I Want A "Guy," With "Goals," and "Ambition"

[Maximus Rex]

The other day I was in that alternate reality known as Yahoo! Abortion Chat 1. Anyway, I asked the question, "Why is it considered inappropriate to ask a women her weight or age? I know the answer, I was just curious to see what "The Room Think," was on this particular topic. Of course I got the typical misandrist hyprocritical reposnses. Then I made the comment that a woman should never ask a man what he does for a living. I told The Room that I felt that asking a man what he does for a living is the equivalent to asking a woman her age, weight, or rack size. The blanant hyprocrisy that promulgates in this room never seizes to amaze me.

Even the biggest of AFC's Nice Guys and Clueless effs know that the "occupation question," is a sh*t test and a qualifer. When I asked why do you need to know what a guy does for a living? The ladies responsed with, "I want a guy with "goals," and "ambition." I can back with, "so you want a guy with money?" Of course they responded with the typical, "No it's not about money answers. "Money isn't important." I'm "independent," and I can support myself." I then asked this question, "So the guy working at McDonald's has a shot with you? Only one chick gave a halfed a$$ed honest response. She said "No. I want to know if a guy wants to do something with his life." These chicks tend to gossip and put their whole life story in the chat room, so I know a little about their personal lives. When babygirl said that, I replied, "Yeah, you need somebody that would be able to support you and your two daughters." Responses like this is why O.M.R. is so villified and deeply loathed in Abortion Chat 1. When I hold up the mirror as I often do, these b*tches don't like the reflection. Homegirl went on to tell me the same nonsensical and hyrocritical b.s. that money wasn't an issue. The kicker is this one stupid b*tch that actually had the audacity to say the reason why she asks what a guy does for living is so "she knows what he does with his day?" Can you believe that sh*t? What bearing does "knowing what a guy does with his day" have to do with how he treats a woman and whether or not a chick would enjoy his company.

It's quite possible that a guy with not personal goals or ambition could be a great guy in a relationship. Just because he's content with working at McDonald's, being a mechanic, working at Jiffy lube, or the comic book place doesn't mean he would be a bad boyfriend. Hell, he might be the best thing for the lady in in question. The point is that whether women admit it or not, they equate a man's ability to make money and provide with his masculinity. The more money he makes, the more stability, security, and opluence he can put in babygirl's life. At least initally anyway.

Like I said what kills me is the blantant hyprocrisy and the excuses that are made for it. Yet instill these "ladies," constantly lambaste and scorn me for my brass and direct honesty. Yes, I want a hot chick and I expect her to put out after three dates. Yes, if I can afford it I want my wife to be a housewife. Yes, I wouldn't enter into a relationship with a single mother, Yes, I wouldn't enter into a relationship with a woman with male "friends." I put it all on the table for ole Rex hides nothing. Either you can except my terms or you can engage in a relationship with somebody who'll kiss your ass and entertain your delusions of ganduer. In the end we'll both be extremely happy.

Part of the reason I frequent Abortion Chat 1 is that I'm utterly fascinated by women and they're f*cked up thought patterns and rationale. These women would plan a trip to from New York to Miami. Get on I-80, instead of I-5, then wonder why five days later why they're in S.F. as opposed to Miami. That's how f*cked up they're thinking is. These gals truly Cannot Understand Normal Thinking and I find it stupefying to say the least.

Go to www.yahooregs.com to see these chicks. You'll quickly find out that that most of them have one thing in common.

 

[Vulpine]

And people wonder why guys loathe the "dating scene".

It's this unrealistic "hypocrisy" that, for any man with a brain or spine (or DJ apprentice), is heinous and obnoxious once understood. Afterwards, there is nothing for a man to feel but pity for these women; for these women have counter-productive attitudes, beliefs, and expectations. Of course, the next action is disassociation from these women. (i.e. "If you can't beat 'em... change the game or stop playing.")

Lately, my attitude has been: "Screw 'em. Maybe one of these days I'll just randomly bump into a chick that isn't a retard. And when I do, I'll surely know it - then maybe it's game on. Meanwhile, 'why can't I find a good man?' is a funny, funny joke to me. (The answer to that question is: because you aren't a good woman)"

Maximus, do a search for a post of mine regarding "women's collective logic". I'm sure you'll get a chuckle out of it. Dude, don't flagellate yourself with women's stupidity - just disassociate.

 

[Latinoman]

I could not find the actual thread in which this was discussed.

But I did find this http://www.yahooregs.com/meeting.html

Take a look at them...and you will see why they are the way they are.

 

[( . )( . )]

You guys are meandering into a dead end, giving thought to this destroys the soul and halts progression.

Be careful.

 

[jonwon]

I love threads like these there are the main reason i keep coming back here and get rather addicted to this site.

Most guys just dont see this shi* i find it refreshing when some guys do.

boob man is right though.

I recently started posting in a discussion about why women want a man to be able to drive, i was sick of the feminine BS around the ideal and the one sided expectaions and BS spreading from each and every one fo them, that the AFC kiss boys where pandering up-to, so i posted a response of the true reason most women would only date a guy with a car and that was it is a representation of value in society, even though the debate was washed with world ideals and the fact cars are fuc*ing the environment up.

I simple left it on a note, of dont drive for women drive for yourself, dont pander to the female collective! If she is testing you for value and material wealth in 5mins of talking to her, well she in my book is most probably not worth keeping around.

Rich men are all too familier with this side of women, thats why most use them like the cheap toys they are, flash guys dont become easy players for a reason!

Drive up in a ferrari to most bars and your most probably guaranteed a fuc*!

Drive up on a push bike and you can forget all that.

But all this tirade is met with scorn from women, the guys who know wont post in case there value in the women eyes are lowered and the AFC boys simply say what ever they feel the women wants to hear.
Women are the true masters of manipulation instead of pulling them on this shi* it is far better to accept what they are and use it against them.

It is all about! well you know what its about, i aint going to waste forum space preaching to the converted

 

[insanity]

i don't know what happened to my woman cause she is nothing like her mother. when i first met the mother, i was in university taking psychology. when the subject came up about what were my goals and i said i was thinking of changing degrees and maybe pursue a teaching career her mother looked disgusted. she said why would i want to do a stupid thing like that. psychologists make more money. i said life isn't about money, it's about what makes you happy. she then said that she almost left her husband because they were poor and she had to work too. i said, i think women should work if the opportunity is necessary. well that didn't fly over to well but hey i'm not there to please her.

arguing with women is like talking to a brick wall....they just don't get it.

 

[joekerr31]

1) sometimes when women ask you what you do for a living its just out of curiosity. sometimes its just to satisfy themselves that you some bum whose looking to freeload off some chics. sometimes its to find out if you have a lot of money. dont assume you know why shes asking this question.

2) there is nothing wrong with money being on the table as an appealing trait about a man. you find nice t*ts and *ss appealing right? that has NOTHING to do with who she is as a person. being turned on by a fat wallet is no more lame than being turned on by t*ts and *ss - although a lot of men have a problem with that because society has trained us all to see women who get turned on by a guy with money as prostitutes. with all do respect, looking at woman you dont even know and thinking 'man she has a nice *ss, i'd love to f*ck her" is JUST as sinful. but we accept that kind of behavior from men because it IS NOT ever going to change. haha. whereas with women theres enough variations (ie. women who dont care about money) that we therefore feel justified ripping on the money wh*res.

3) just playing devils advocate in all this. if I were a woman i'm not so sure that i wouldn't see money as a good indicator of the quality of man i'm dealing with. perhaps not in ever respect. BUT, it does tell me enough - it tells me that his genes are such that he's been able to be successful in this world. and if i plan on having kids i'd want them to be able to be successful in this world. so a man with money already suggests that he's got SOME of the things id be looking for in a mate to reproduce with.

4) women know expressing that they are with someone because of money isn't PC - so don't ever expect them to admit it.

5) sometimes a woman doesnt actually care about the money in the way you think. sometimes she only cares about it as a trophy. just like a guy may not NEED the hottest woman out there, but having one makes him feel like a big swinging d*ck with his social circle. women are 10000 times worse in terms of caring about what others think - and having a successful man is a nice bonus. then they can chat up all their girlfriends about how they took a vacation in the bahamas and how frank just bought her diamond earrings.


now, all of the above is just devils advocate and basic truth.

personally, i make a fair amount of money. although ironically i invest it all, so you'd never know how well off i was.

hey, in this world anyone can buy a nice suit and decent watch and shoes and look like they make a million bucks.

what I've found in life is that fake people attract fake people, and real people attract real people. And if your REAL then you can spot the money wh*res a MILE away.

really all this is a non issue in my mind. ive got money but because im real i only develop relationships with women who are real and who aren't with me because ive got money. and i know this because my life hasn't changed at all between when ive had money and when i didn't - at least with women it hasnt. they find themselves interested in me, not my money.

i argue this is further true because i dont spend money on them. haha. IM CHEAP!

hmmm spend 5k on a growth stock that might return me 25-50% in the year OR take a trip to the bahamas.

at this point in life i pick the stock. IF anything they find it annoying that i have money but live well beneath my means. they damn well better be enjoying ME, because they aren't getting anything from me financial.

point to all this is that money IS NOT the deciding factor.

and also that a woman asking what you do does not mean she's qualifying you for rejection. i have the same level of success / failure with women before as i do now (broke before, well off now - but no real difference).

but look, IF its a big issue for you just joke about it. say something like "Hmmm, I'll tell you what i do on our fourth date."

you've done 2 great things. 1) you've just build mystery (which is always good) and 2) you've now got her working on making sure you like her so that she can find out more about you.

 

[lee36044]

Money may not be the deciding factor but you better believe there are more money wh0's than real women out there. And Status Wh0's! And Securty Wh0's. and on and on!

Good point about not assuming a woman means anything by any question or comment they may make. It bears repeating. Assumption = probable error. Even if they do have a motive in the asking ... your assumption probably isn't the correct one.

Regards

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Yo JoeKerr,


Good point about the whole money thing. And you are right when you say that a lot of guy's go for a woman physically, while a lot of women go for guys materially.

But I STILL think we guys get the short end of that whole deal. Why? Lets say something bad happens, like a tragedy of some sort. And each party loses what it is about them that makes them THE MOST attractive to the other.

The reason I say WE usually are on the losing end of a deal like that is because:

"It's easier to separate a fool from his money than it is to separate a chick from her ASS..."


LOL!

 

[jonwon]

joker nice points.

But ask this question:
Why is it men have to post the situation and reply, where as women dont see it as the norm?

Also from my experiance men openly admit they prefer a women with a nice rack, where as women DO NOT openly admit they want status and security as a pre-quisit, due to double standards of being labled! Still does not detract from the motivating factor.

No wonder men get confused with 'what do women want' since women wont for the life of them tell you what the fuc* they want, men have to rely on other smarter men to suss that shi* out.

Admittingly women may be polite and asking about your social status, but men as a norm dont really ask those type of question on meeting a women for the first 5 MINUTES, women dont even take the chance as a MAJORITY and not a MINORITY of knowing what a man is like past is social worth!

There is proof everywhere even if women play it down.

There are execptions to every rule, but we are talking about the normal way things work and not the exception.

women marry up normally! Not down and if she does marry down you can bet your ass she will be trying to make you slot more in society money idea.
Women are far more materialistic then men, see shopping e.t.c.
Women value far more then men social interaction with there own gender, men can be happy sat at home playing games or watching the latest match with nacho's, women need it to be a social affair, normally.

Women are more social and want a man to be able to make sociaty work for him i.e going back to the animal drive of instincts in the form of security for there unborn kid to put it into its smallest term.

The fact is women dont admit that shi* above, they openly deny it but as the rule most men come to learn dont judge women by there words judge by there actions and actions for women to me = social worth as a MAIN POINT, granted all fine and well, but its about time the biatches fuc*ing admitted it.

Also joker posting about money, makes me wonder if you really see the oppositte side of the spectrum, like the part i said above.

Drive around in a ferrari or look sharp, easy player.

Drive around on a push bike with bike clips, you better be one fuc*ing Hunk, thats all.

Yes women want social proof, but the point is women swear blind they DONT.

Hence the hypocrisy when a real men puts is balls out there and tells it how it is and what he wants without bowing down to the female BS that is paramount, to the ones that see it.

most effective seduction is centered around social proof, it is the main topic in most of the stuff pumped out by gurus as they know women can be manipulated with this shi*.

Coming out and telling a women how rich you are, makes her feel your trying to impress her granted, but dropping it in the converstion works like a fuc*ing silver bullet, i know i see it alot, mates that have flash cars and there own business play on this.

 

[WaterTiger]

If a guy is still in High School or working his way through college and he's working at Burger King or making sandwiches in the local deli, I think it's great. They are wonderful starter jobs. But I don't expect him to have that job for ever. By the time he's in his late 20's he should have a career that doesn't involve asking "Do you want fries with that?". Maybe work his way up to Manager or Regional Director?

But when men get to be in their late 30's, early 40's and have a job flipping burgers (unless they own the place)....I see that as a major problem in their life. Lack of goals and ambition is a severe lack of DJ-ness. No desire to improve themselves, their life, their career or anything. Just float through life with no direction or purpose. Now why would ANY woman want to be with a guy like that? Would you date a woman like that?

 

[jonwon]

If a guy is still in High School or working his way through college and he's working at Burger King or making sandwiches in the local deli, I think it's great. They are wonderful starter jobs. But I don't expect him to have that job for ever. By the time he's in his late 20's he should have a career that doesn't involve asking "Do you want fries with that?". Maybe work his way up to Manager or Regional Director?

But when men get to be in their late 30's, early 40's and have a job flipping burgers (unless they own the place)....I see that as a major problem in their life. Lack of goals and ambition is a severe lack of DJ-ness. No desire to improve themselves, their life, their career or anything. Just float through life with no direction or purpose. Now why would ANY woman want to be with a guy like that? Would you date a woman like that?

If she had a nice rack, yep i probably would.

All men need to get off there arse* and get what you described, women are hardly going to change, but at least some men know what women want without the added vail of manipulation and feminine BS.

When you understand what women are attracted to, it is a good motivator for one to get off his ars* and improve his life.

We can get piss*d at it, but we wont change it, we can only do what we can to shift it in our favour.

but there are also men out there that are happy with there life, life does not equal social worth to alot of guys, in fact alot of guys are more about finding who they are and not finding who they are as in a slot in society.

Granted it may seem losser-ish but then again as long as you can survive, live happy and be content, who is to judge?

Thats the point! Men cant be happy working in BK on flip duty simply due to society wont let them be.

what about the budding artist on zero cash, he gets results since an artists is consdered a social norm or an attraction, but he is fundimentally a bum none the less, its not technically about money but it is about how you are in the social order.

Drug dealers for example are attractive to women that go down those routes and the hottest drug dealer with the best connection will get the hottest fuc*ed up chick, or find it easier.

Society and there interaction in it, social worth in many contexts is attractive to women, period.

 

[Latinoman]

Sometimes they might ask what you do for a living to truly know if you have a career or are studying or are independent or are selling drugs or unemployed or simply out of curiosity. Or sometimes to have an idea of how much $$$ you are making.

I ALSO ask women what they do for a living. And I would disqualify MANY from "relationship material" based on that answer.

My experience is that if she only wants to phuck? She won't care what you do. But if she wants a POTENTIAL relationship...then she is going to care. And she should. I know I would care too.

 

[kyphan]

I love these threads because I can relate them to my life and people I know.

My first sales manager is about 40 years old and has been married for a little over a decade now. He's the perfect example of a less-than-studly DJ in my book. He's constantly joking around with everyone, very friendly, and sticks to his guns. When he and his wife got married he was making a decent paycheck as an experienced forklift mechanic, probably a little more than the average person. At the time I believe she made as much if not more than him. Thing is, he wanted to be more than a mechanic. When they had their first child she stopped working and he finally made that big move - he started up a new department in his company and began selling. Except he made HALF as much as he used to in the beginning. Now 10+ years later he makes six figures easily and she is a stay at home mom.

How is their financial situation? Great, actually. They discuss all major purchases in advance, and he still has the ability to do what he wants with the money he earns as long as it's feasible.

What the heck is my point? If you are a man, a DJ if you will, you SHOULD be ambitious in your career and you SHOULD pursue your dreams. When a woman asks you what you do and where you want to go in life you should be damn proud of your answer, too. Ask them what they do. It will tell you A LOT about their motivations in life. Make sure you philosophy on money is practically the same. Some girls need to be pampered and some do not. Never take the "What do you do for a living?" as a bad sign.

 

[Vulpine]

3) just playing devils advocate in all this. if I were a woman i'm not so sure that i wouldn't see money as a good indicator of the quality of man i'm dealing with. perhaps not in ever respect. ------>BUT, it does tell me enough - it tells me that his genes are such that he's been able to be successful in this world. and if i plan on having kids i'd want them to be able to be successful in this world. so a man with money already suggests that he's got SOME of the things id be looking for in a mate to reproduce with.

Ok, devil's advocate: :moon:

So, $$$ = quality man? $$$ = good genes? ($$$ = No history of Asthma, cancer, hair loss, diabetes, etc. in the family?) $$$ = success? Let me ask you then, does $$$ also = stable, caring, happy family unit? For that matter, does $$$ = happiness at all, really?


You are trying to use "Women's collective logic" here. Lots of bad logic does not equal a little good logic.

T!TT!ES tried cutting you off before you sounded like a retarded woman.:crazy:

Money is money, nothing more.

Q: How do you keep your girlfriend from seeing the lipstick on your collar?
A: Hold out a few hundred dollar bills in front of yourself.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Men typically could care less what a woman earns or what she does to earn it - it's simply not a factor in attraction for us - we don't take a woman's status or wealth into consideration, all she has to be is hot. That is a guy's one condition for intimacy, physical attraction. She's gotta be hot - whether she makes six figures or is in the pit of poverty is irrelevant in attraction. Oprah and Star Jone's husbands still have to get aroused, and all the money in the world wont be any better an aphrodisiac.

Status, wealth and the other rewards that result from 'professional' life are conditions women have for MEN in attraction. That's not to discount men being physically attractive or other conditions, but women have far more conditions for their intimacy than men, and these conditions are predicated on characteristics that prove a man as a good provider for her and any future offspring's security. These male characteristics (or sometimes just the prospects of a man attaining them) are defined by women as having value and are therefore attractive - attractive enough to make a man with these qualities one to be competed for with other women. Women define what is masculine, they define what male traits have value for their investment of intimacy. Men define what is feminine, they define what female traits have value for their investment of their provision of security and meeting the condition criteria women place on them for their intimacy.

Women would love the conditions for attraction to be predicated upon their professional status (wealth), individual merit and/or aspects of their personal integrity, and a whole list of esoteric qualities, but they still fight against men's basic impulses - she's-go-to-be-hot! If a woman is attractive a man is more than happy to have her foot the bill regardless of comparative incomes, it's just icing on the cake for us, but this is analogous to a woman who marries a rich guy who also happens to be good looking.

On the flip side of the argument, most professional men are AFC Nice Guys, due to the fact that the demands of becoming a professional, educated male with talent, abilities, skills, tends to require him to sacrifice his personal life, development of social skills and the ability for an honest estimation of his own worth with regards to women and what their own motivations are for different stages of their own lives.

What you're experiencing in these forums is a very common feminine social contrivance. It's simply an attempt to change the game to better suit their innability to play it. It's a feminine double standard - they know damn well that a man's one criteria for intimacy is physical attraction, it's been conditioned into them since they were 5 y.o. But in order to deal with this they'd rather change the game than actually try to play it better (that would mean physically improving themselves). So they foster the idea that men "ought" to be attracted to their personalities; it's what's on the inside that counts right? So logically they must bear this up in their own self-image and deny the otherwise supeficial list of prerequisites they actually demand for their own intimacies. And if even attractive women can be taught to reinforce this shame into men they level the playingfield tha much more for themselves.

When a woman asks what you do for a living, be a mystery: tell her you're a disposable lighter repairman with a wink and a ****y smile.

 

[Latinoman]

Men typically could care less what a woman earns or what she does to earn it - it's simply not a factor in attraction for us - we don't take a woman's status or wealth into consideration, all she has to be is hot. That is a guy's one condition for intimacy, physical attraction. She's gotta be hot - whether she makes six figures or is in the pit of poverty is irrelevant in attraction. Oprah and Star Jone's husbands still have to get aroused, and all the money in the world wont be any better an aphrodisiac.

I don't disagree with this at all.

In my particular case...I don't care if it is simply for sex or FWB status. But I do care if it is for a relationship.

The reason is...why would I want to be involved in a SERIOUS LTR relationship with a woman that I know is with me because of my $$$ or a woman that does not work or a woman that career is stripping or a woman that is over 30 and is working as a waitress or as a cashier in Waltmart? Nothing wrong with either one of them...but, I can afford to be selective.

I don't care how much a woman make ($$$). I care that she is SEXY and that she is INDEPENDENT, among other things.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

In my particular case...I don't care if it is simply for sex or FWB status. But I do care if it is for a relationship.

True, but you don't get to the relationship stage unless she's attractive to you in the first place. This is the primary condition men have. Women want physically attractive men too, but this is one of many conditions for their intimacy that change in priority depending on their ability to attract them.

How to spot a rich guy

 

[Drum&Bass]

Jonwon, said:

but there are also men out there that are happy with there life, life does not equal social worth to alot of guys, in fact alot of guys are more about finding who they are and not finding who they are as in a slot in society.

Granted it may seem losser-ish but then again as long as you can survive, live happy and be content, who is to judge?

Why would you consider this loser behavior ??

I think this is a level that all people should strive for.

When you understand what women are attracted to, it is a good motivator for one to get off his ars* and improve his life.

Nice, we should all start living our lives based on what women are attracted to..very trendy !

We can get piss*d at it, but we wont change it, we can only do what we can to shift it in our favour.

Or we could just leave women to their own vices and not worry about trying to one up them in some sort of weird game.

what about the budding artist on zero cash, he gets results since an artists is consdered a social norm or an attraction, but he is fundimentally a bum none the less, its not technically about money but it is about how you are in the social order.

I don't understand this statement.

And people wonder why guys loathe the "dating scene".

It's this unrealistic "hypocrisy" that, for any man with a brain or spine (or DJ apprentice), is heinous and obnoxious once understood. Afterwards, there is nothing for a man to feel but pity for these women; for these women have counter-productive attitudes, beliefs, and expectations. Of course, the next action is disassociation from these women. (i.e. "If you can't beat 'em... change the game or stop playing.")

Lately, my attitude has been: "Screw 'em. Maybe one of these days I'll just randomly bump into a chick that isn't a retard. And when I do, I'll surely know it - then maybe it's game on. Meanwhile, 'why can't I find a good man?' is a funny, funny joke to me. (The answer to that question is: because you aren't a good woman)"

Maximus, do a search for a post of mine regarding "women's collective logic". I'm sure you'll get a chuckle out of it. Dude, don't flagellate yourself with women's stupidity - just disassociate.

- Vulpine AGREED !!!

 

[Latinoman]

True, but you don't get to the relationship stage unless she's attractive to you in the first place. This is the primary condition men have. Women want physically attractive men too, but this is one of many conditions for their intimacy that change in priority depending on their ability to attract them.

How to spot a rich guy

She MUST be SEXY. Doesn't have to be a "HB-10" by societal standards (some HB-10 lack the sexual appeal and some HB-8 has sexual appeal). But she MUST be DESIREABLE.

That is my primary condition. After all, I NEVER approach any woman for the purpose of developing a LTR. That tends to happen later.

Very good points RT.