I think that the average assessing skills of the average man greatly increased recently

[Fortune_favors_the_bold]

The guys they don't want already know it would be a waste of time to go to a 'singles event', while the guys they do want don't need to go to a 'singles event'.

I believe this comment nailed it.

I was invited to an event like that recently and after seeing the location, the time and the cost I politely came up with an excuse not to go.

It was a bad idea from any possible point of view wheter we consider the entrance fee, the mental health lost, the wasted time to drive and park and the fact that the incentives and deterrents were hard to distinguish given the demographics.

For those that dont know me, I'm in my late 30s and most women my age or close to it that attend those places are the richer and more annoying version of those annoying high school teacher we had as teens.

Btw talking about mass surveillance, that video came as a suggestion after I searched on google how those events work.

 

[Solomon]

I'm in my late 30's and can't tell you the last time I've been to a club, heck this summer I haven't been at a bar past 6 pm
I always thought it was cringe to see that 45-year-old guy with a pot belly at the club trying to talk to hot 20-year-olds and he is buying them drinks. I rather be watching videos and doing research on crypto videos lol

On another note cold approaching in 2023 is risky unless you get an IOI, 10 years ago it was still acceptable but now you're a "Creeper" it's a weird time we live in

 

[SW15]

We have a thread about structured singles events.

Are Structured Singles Events a Waste of Time?

Mostly every unattached person has dealt with this. The potential invitation to a "singles event" or "singles mixer". It is a chance for unattached people to meet. It's not a general night out at a bar, which has unattached people interspersed with attached people. Everyone here is unattached by...

www.sosuave.net

Normie range men don't want to go to a typical structured singles event because the quality of women at structured singles events is abysmal. They aren't good on either looks or attitudes. Desirable women don't show up to structured singles events but desirable women will show up to bars on regular, unstructured nights.

Women, especially White, American women, operate by what's cool. Structured singles events are not cool, so the most desirable, fit women won't go.

In the video, the first structured singles event was all Black women. Most non-Black men aren't interested in Black women. There'd never be a structured singles events with all physically attractive Hispanic women or all physically attractive White women.

Structured singles events that I've attended are mostly subpar to mediocre White women chasing top tier men.

 

[SW15]

On another note cold approaching in 2023 is risky unless you get an IOI, 10 years ago it was still acceptable but now you're a "Creeper" it's a weird time we live in

It depends on looks. If you're attractive, you're not a creeper for making approaches without an IOI. If you're normie range on looks, it can go either way. If you're subpar looking, then it is considered creepy.

 

[IamtheAlphamale]

It depends on looks. If you're attractive, you're not a creeper for making approaches without an IOI. If you're normie range on looks, it can go either way. If you're subpar looking, then it is considered creepy.

Even if you don't have initial interest or are even attractive you can just do the under the radar, indirect approach.

Takes a little while to develop a connection with women.

 

[The Duke]

Has anyone here actually been to a singles event? How was it?

 

[SW15]

Has anyone here actually been to a singles event? How was it?

I have been to singles events and have found that it brings out a weak talent pool of women, mainly no one above a 6. Also, the 5-6s act entitled AF. Many boring types come out, like female accountants and some careerists too.

 

[Slowhandluke]

Has anyone here actually been to a singles event? How was it?

I've been to a speed dating one aprox 4 years ago. Actually, it was held at the same time a comic convention was going on. I was actually going for that event. The organizers didn't have enough men and they saw me (the stud that I am in my antman costume They asked if I wanted to be involved. I said, "sure." They then said it was $15. I was like, "I'm not sure if I'm interested. Can I peak inside to see if the vibe was for me?"

I looked inside. It was a bunch of older women (mid-30's??). Maybe 25 women total? Not very attractive. I told them, "I'm good". They were sad.

I don't remember seeing any men at all... but I'm sure there must of been a few. Ever since, I'm very weary of singles events.

 

[I_have_BDE]

I've been to a speed dating one aprox 4 years ago. Actually, it was held at the same time a comic convention was going on. I was actually going for that event. The organizers didn't have enough men and they saw me (the stud that I am in my antman costume They asked if I wanted to be involved. I said, "sure." They then said it was $15. I was like, "I'm not sure if I'm interested. Can I peak inside to see if the vibe was for me?"

I looked inside. It was a bunch of older women (mid-30's??). Maybe 25 women total? Not very attractive. I told them, "I'm good". They were sad.

I don't remember seeing any men at all... but I'm sure there must of been a few. Ever since, I'm very weary of singles events.

Match llc does them in big cities. Like i get the emails saying women sold out lol. Reviews for their events as are dull. Maybe like 9 people show up. Someone on here posted about going to a match llc one and said it was small, few awkward women, and odd men on the spectrum. Waste of time. I supposed if you go to one and there actually IS a decent woman there you'd do okay if the other guys are weirdos.

 

[sangheilios]

@Fortune_favors_the_bold and @The Duke

I went to a speed dating event back in the spring of 2019. I wanted to try out something new that I thought would be fun and I was honestly looking forward to it. It was around $20 and honestly not all that difficult to get to or far for me, so that wasn't really an issue.

Anyway, when I got there though I very quickly got a very bad feeling about it. Many of the other men there were incredibly awkward looking and I felt very out of place. There was one guy that had these crutches on his arms like Jimmy from South Park lol. I actually had this feeling that I should have walked out but I decided to stay and see how the event would play out.

There were about a dozen or so women, all of which were normal tier women, ranging from some that were overweight or slightly unattractive and others that were just average in attractiveness, so what I was honestly expecting. There were 2 women that were actually enjoyable to talk to and added to the interaction/conversation we were having. However, the rest of the women were terrible to be quite honest. There were a few that were just very difficult to talk to that just didn't really say much or add to the interaction. There were a few that were blatantly rude and disrespectful to me during our interaction. One made this comment in a snarky tone about something I said, which I found slightly annoying. There were 2 that through their body language were incredibly off putting, I don't really know how to describe it through writing.

Anyway, I left the event and honestly regretted having gone and just felt angry about my experience there. A version of me today would NEVER consider going to an event like that not because of rejection but just not wanting to be interacting with women that can't even behave themselves for a couple minutes in an environment that is ultimately supposed to be a fun and enjoyable experience. I think the biggest issue with these events is that the people going, both men and women, are more often than not there for a reason. As a man, you are highly likely to end up interacting with women that are incredibly awkward, have poor social skills, stuck up/snotty or some combination of these traits and others along a similar spectrum. I believe that the experience I had is a reflection of this and would be a reasonable expectation that other men should have if they were to attend an event like that. It's kind of unfortunate because it's actually a neat idea and with the right people could be a very fun night out.

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Thanks for the description I have never done one of these and have no interest.

As a recovering entrepreneur my mind goes to the organizers missing an opportunity. Before the meet and greet begins segregate the men and women into groups with a motivational speaker that softens them up to what’s about to occur. Provide some advice and some levity to loosen the people up a bit and maybe teach them a thing or two before they interact. They could charge a few more bucks for this…

When you provide a product or service you want people to feel better not worse for having purchased it.

@Fortune_favors_the_bold and @The Duke

I went to a speed dating event back in the spring of 2019. I wanted to try out something new that I thought would be fun and I was honestly looking forward to it. It was around $20 and honestly not all that difficult to get to or far for me, so that wasn't really an issue.

Anyway, when I got there though I very quickly got a very bad feeling about it. Many of the other men there were incredibly awkward looking and I felt very out of place. There was one guy that had these crutches on his arms like Jimmy from South Park lol. I actually had this feeling that I should have walked out but I decided to stay and see how the event would play out.

There were about a dozen or so women, all of which were normal tier women, ranging from some that were overweight or slightly unattractive and others that were just average in attractiveness, so what I was honestly expecting. There were 2 women that were actually enjoyable to talk to and added to the interaction/conversation we were having. However, the rest of the women were terrible to be quite honest. There were a few that were just very difficult to talk to that just didn't really say much or add to the interaction. There were a few that were blatantly rude and disrespectful to me during our interaction. One made this comment in a snarky tone about something I said, which I found slightly annoying. There were 2 that through their body language were incredibly off putting, I don't really know how to describe it through writing.

Anyway, I left the event and honestly regretted having gone and just felt angry about my experience there. A version of me today would NEVER consider going to an event like that not because of rejection but just not wanting to be interacting with women that can't even behave themselves for a couple minutes in an environment that is ultimately supposed to be a fun and enjoyable experience. I think the biggest issue with these events is that the people going, both men and women, are more often than not there for a reason. As a man, you are highly likely to end up interacting with women that are incredibly awkward, have poor social skills, stuck up/snotty or some combination of these traits and others along a similar spectrum. I believe that the experience I had is a reflection of this and would be a reasonable expectation that other men should have if they were to attend an event like that. It's kind of unfortunate because it's actually a neat idea and with the right people could be a very fun night out.

 

[SW15]

I have been to singles events and have found that it brings out a weak talent pool of women, mainly no one above a 6. Also, the 5-6s act entitled AF. Many boring types come out, like female accountants and some careerists too.

I went to a speed dating event back in the spring of 2019.

Waste of time. I supposed if you go to one and there actually IS a decent woman there you'd do okay if the other guys are weirdos.

Speed dating events count as a structured singles event, though a sub-variant of singles events in general.

Speed dating events are a nice idea in theory, but atrocious in practice. I went a long ago time, much longer ago than when @sangheilios went. I don't think there's ever been a time (to my knowledge, speed dating started coming up in the 1990s) where a speed dating event hasn't been awkward. The men that go to speed dating events are either normie or subpar on looks and usually not great on social skills/lack a social network in that city. It's not a great talent pool of men. The men most women want aren't at speed dating events. The women aren't usually impressive either. The women on average typically aren't great either. They have better social skills on average than the typical man, but their looks aren't there (mainly no one above a 6) and most have expectations out of line with their own market value. They might be a 5 but they are expecting a man who is at least an 8-8.5.

At speed dating events, most men are thirsty and will indicate a willingness to match to nearly every woman on the speed dating card they fill out at the end of the night. This is the lower tech equivalent of swiping right on mostly everyone. The women will typically reject all the men on their speed dating card. No matches are made, and no real first dates happen. Both men and women leave upset, frustrated, and disappointed in the experience.

Singles mixers/single events with open mingling at a venue are as bad as speed dating. The talent pool is nearly the same as the speed dating talent pool that I described above. The main difference in an open mingling situation is that men will ask for a date and women's numbers on the spot. Some men will get numbers and a date agreement, only to often have women flake out before the date actually happens. Some men will get rejected either harshly or softly in the moment when they ask for a number. Some men will look at the talent pool, realize it is so bad, and ask no one out. The ask out scenarios I described above are usually men asking out a woman who is typically a 4.5 - 6 on looks.

Any sort of structured gimmick that puts single people together is bound to be a disappointment in the real world. Desirable women do not show up to structured singles events of any kind. There's no reason for a man to show up if desirable women aren't going to be there. At the same time, the top tier, most elite that women want and think that they deserve based on unreasonable expectations aren't typically attending those events.

It is good that men are finally realizing that these structured events are total crap. I think men are finally realizing this because these events have been bad for 25+ years and multiple generations of men have shared their lousy experiences on the internet.

Regular nights out at the bars are way better than structured singles events, despite the challenges of the regular nightlife scene. Participating in a co-ed sports league to try and get laid is even a better idea than a structured singles event. Swipe apps and sending DMs on Instagram offer the convenience of being able to sit at home and be dressed in comfortable clothing. There's nothing good about structured singles events in-person.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

Every 'structured singles event' has been shunned by men since the beginning of church socials. I'm sure these women can come up with other ways to drag single men into relationships.