I think I got rejected through text by an Asian girl, need help?

[Deicide]

Hey, I cold approached a Japanese girl 2 weeks ago, and I got her number. Since I was no longer at college, I decided to try to build comfort with a couple phone calls. I was going to schedule a date last night, but she didn't answer. Then she texted me, and asked if I called. lol I told her yes, asked her how her weekend was, then told her I was going to plan out another meeting between us this Friday after she finished class.
Tonight, I got a text from her saying "Sorry, I can't go with you, I'm busy" I just replied back with Ok, that's fine. Then she texts me with "Oh, are you a college student?" And I just explained my situation. What does this all mean?
I think I've been rejected, but that text she sent seemed to have some interest behind it. I don't know, I've never got past a first date with a girl before. So, what do I need to do with this situation? I think I'll not talk to her for about 2 weeks, then call randomly, and try to set something up then. If nothing, forget her.
I normally wouldn't make a thread about this, but I want to know what I'm doing wrong. Because girls almost always go cold on me after I get their numbers, and always after a first date.

 

[Kirro]

Hey, I cold approached a Japanese girl 2 weeks ago, and I got her number. Since I was no longer at college, I decided to try to build comfort with a couple phone calls. I was going to schedule a date last night, but she didn't answer. Then she texted me, and asked if I called. lol I told her yes, asked her how her weekend was, then told her I was going to plan out another meeting between us this Friday after she finished class.
Tonight, I got a text from her saying "Sorry, I can't go with you, I'm busy" I just replied back with Ok, that's fine. Then she texts me with "Oh, are you a college student?" And I just explained my situation. What does this all mean?
I think I've been rejected, but that text she sent seemed to have some interest behind it. I don't know, I've never got past a first date with a girl before. So, what do I need to do with this situation? I think I'll not talk to her for about 2 weeks, then call randomly, and try to set something up then. If nothing, forget her.
I normally wouldn't make a thread about this, but I want to know what I'm doing wrong. Because girls almost always go cold on me after I get their numbers, and always after a first date.

Well, she didn't provide a counter offer so that pretty much says she's not totally enthusiastic about the idea of spending time with you in person. You can try calling her a week from now but I wouldn't expect much. I'd say this venture is pretty much over.

As for the whole girls going cold on you, could you post some examples of how you talk to girls? What an interaction/conversation with you is like? Could you post a past conversation verbatim?

For now I can only stab at air given the results you've stated.

You say girls go cold on you? You're obviously failing to induce the gina tingles either during the 1st ever interaction or sometime afterward. Maybe you're being too safe, too cautious, too timid, maybe you're afraid not to push boundaries for fear of messing up or coming across as creepy. Its a tough game out there man, we're all playing against each other, to stay in a girl's mind & get in her pants you have to set yourself apart.

I gotta ask, how would you rate yourself physically? Any obvious improvements you think you can make? I doubt you can raise your social status overnight(you're a SS member duh) & I doubt you're rolling in dough(you're a SS member...double duh). So you're gonna have to work on developing some killer charm & make any physical buffs you can.

 

[jax871]

She's not interested. Do your best to stop thinking about it. Even if she was to eventually go out on a date with you again its unlikely it will go anywhere. Invest your time and energy in new girls, dont lose momentum.

Also that whole building comfort idea with a couple phone calls... not good. You make one phone call, talk 20 minutes tops, and set up the next date. Your making yourself to available.

 

[JPlaya]

Next!

 

[Ace_Magnamus]

Hey, I cold approached a Japanese girl 2 weeks ago, and I got her number. Since I was no longer at college, I decided to try to build comfort with a couple phone calls. I was going to schedule a date last night, but she didn't answer. Then she texted me, and asked if I called. lol I told her yes, asked her how her weekend was, then told her I was going to plan out another meeting between us this Friday after she finished class.
Tonight, I got a text from her saying "Sorry, I can't go with you, I'm busy" I just replied back with Ok, that's fine. Then she texts me with "Oh, are you a college student?" And I just explained my situation. What does this all mean?
I think I've been rejected, but that text she sent seemed to have some interest behind it. I don't know, I've never got past a first date with a girl before. So, what do I need to do with this situation? I think I'll not talk to her for about 2 weeks, then call randomly, and try to set something up then. If nothing, forget her.
I normally wouldn't make a thread about this, but I want to know what I'm doing wrong. Because girls almost always go cold on me after I get their numbers, and always after a first date.

did you meet her at a college?

she didn't know you that well at all....you went about this all wrong

you tried to get a date by the phone.....she didnt answer... she texted you.....then you went to text to get your date...she rejected you...you texted back...and she asked you if you were in college.....why didnt she know that?....she doesnt know you well thats why.

you should of never tried to schedule a date that fast over text...you should of tried to build some IL first.

that is why she rejected you....low IL and she didnt know you that well...she wasnt interested.

I dont understand why you would ask for a date when you were trying to build comfort first. she didn't answer...just texted you....that shows lack of interest....so you dont talk to her to build the comfort and you ask for a date thru text? thats why it didnt work.

if a chick misses my call she will call me back...that shows her interest....you just got a text.

so....she didnt answer your call....didnt know that was you for sure who called....texted you to ask that....you texted her to meet up....she rejected....you texted back said it was ok....she asked you about being in college....then you explained....and now have no date

she wasn't interested in chilling and you had no time to build up any IL or comfort with her.

next time make sure you get a convo first before you ask her out and asking thru text isnt good if you never really talked to her before.

try again next time with another chick

 

[phatboi408]

Why are trying to built comfort when you didnt even have attraction??
Get attraction first then qualify then comfort is much later...

 

[Deicide]

did you meet her at a college?

she didn't know you that well at all....you went about this all wrong

you tried to get a date by the phone.....she didnt answer... she texted you.....then you went to text to get your date...she rejected you...you texted back...and she asked you if you were in college.....why didnt she know that?....she doesnt know you well thats why.

you should of never tried to schedule a date that fast over text...you should of tried to build some IL first.

that is why she rejected you....low IL and she didnt know you that well...she wasnt interested.

I dont understand why you would ask for a date when you were trying to build comfort first. she didn't answer...just texted you....that shows lack of interest....so you dont talk to her to build the comfort and you ask for a date thru text? thats why it didnt work.

if a chick misses my call she will call me back...that shows her interest....you just got a text.

so....she didnt answer your call....didnt know that was you for sure who called....texted you to ask that....you texted her to meet up....she rejected....you texted back said it was ok....she asked you about being in college....then you explained....and now have no date

she wasn't interested in chilling and you had no time to build up any IL or comfort with her.

next time make sure you get a convo first before you ask her out and asking thru text isnt good if you never really talked to her before.

try again next time with another chick

I met her after my time at college was done, because I was at the college trying to get my transcripts for grad school. I saw her in a building and started talking to her.
I just opened with "Hey, are you taking summer classes here?" We just talked for a few minutes, and it was mostly me dominating the conversation since she doesn't speak English well. I tried not to qualify myself to her, but I did mention that I had taken a Japanese class. But, she was laughing at a lot of what I was saying, and I teased her about her accent. I got her number, called her in front of her to show her what was my number, then I left. So basically, I don't know how to trigger emotions to start attraction in women. I just had my mind set on asking for a date then, because I felt it was time before she forgot about me. And I know she is meeting Asian men at college that she has more in common with than me. How do I go about qualifying a girl?
The only way I've been able to create attraction is by blindly doing ****y and funny, and giving occasional negs. That's it. Really, I'm still clueless about turning on attraction switches in women.

I will try again with another girl, I'm just tired of this happening all the time with women. It's so frustrating that I struggle to get dates and numbers. I feel lost. I don't see how so many of my friends got into relationships around here.

I'm in good shape but I'm a stocky built guy that is 5'9 and weighs 175. I can get numbers from 6's and 7's, but 8's and above typically don't even want to talk to me when I approach. Here's a recent pic.
http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/121/derekgrad2011.jpg/
http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/52/collegegraduation201105.jpg/

And yes, my face is fuller in the first pic, because exams week, eating out, and a lack of exercise don't do a body good. But, I'm getting back into shape with my boxing classes. I should be down to 165 in no time.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

I say this because I want you to start having success, not to hate.... but you GOTTA do something with your hair bro.... its not as bad as a older guy's comb-over, but it screams "I'm trying to look cool" when it doesn't.

Sorry bro, not trying to sound harsh, but your approaches are solid, its your look you need to work on. There is a lack of attraction from the girls you are approaching and if you work on your hair style and lose some weight I think things will turn around quickly.





PIMP

 

[phatboi408]

Have you ever consider taking training from a pickup coach ??? It will solve alot of sticking points you have right now that would normally take you years to figure out.

 

[Deicide]

Have you ever consider taking training from a pickup coach ??? It will solve alot of sticking points you have right now that would normally take you years to figure out.

Yeah, I actually was on the phone with a Venusian Arts representative about possibly doing a Chicago bootcamp yesterday(I'd like to do it, but I don't have enough money), and I'm trying to set up a 1on1 training session with a PUA in my area. So, I really do need some pick-up training, I'm sure it'd help me a lot. Finances are what is holding me back. I need to save up money.

At Pimp: Thanks for the advice. I need contructive criticism and there is no harm taken from me over it.

 

[vatoloco]

The rest of the guys have already given you good advice but I wanted to comment on what Pimp-sicle has already mentioned.

I say this because I want you to start having success, not to hate.... but you GOTTA do something with your hair bro.... its not as bad as a older guy's comb-over, but it screams "I'm trying to look cool" when it doesn't.

Again, like Pimp, I'm telling you this for your own good, not because I'm trying to be a dick here. You get kudos for putting your pic up but, unfortunately, you exude a "goofy" vibe that's probably turning women off. That hairstyle is killing you. IDK how advanced your thinning is but you might wanna explore a shaved/very short cut along with some facial hair.

Sorry bro, not trying to sound harsh, but your approaches are solid, its your look you need to work on. There is a lack of attraction from the girls you are approaching and if you work on your hair style and lose some weight I think things will turn around quickly.

Put some muscle on, too. You're not an ugly kid (no homo). The proof is that girls are giving you their numbers and agreeing to going out with you (at least for the first date).

However, it seems like the lukewarm initial attraction is being killed somewhere on that first date somehow. You're white so you have an advantage with Asian girls but you need to identify (and correct!) whatever it is you're doing during these first dates in addition to improving your style.

 

[Pimp-sicle]

Yeah, I actually was on the phone with a Venusian Arts representative about possibly doing a Chicago bootcamp yesterday(I'd like to do it, but I don't have enough money), and I'm trying to set up a 1on1 training session with a PUA in my area. So, I really do need some pick-up training, I'm sure it'd help me a lot. Finances are what is holding me back. I need to save up money.

At Pimp: Thanks for the advice. I need contructive criticism and there is no harm taken from me over it.

But are you understanding what I'm telling you? Look these sites and learning to be a confident, fun, seductive guy def works and is a great addition to your life, BUT if you have major flaws in your physical presentation it will be VERY DIFFICULT to start seeing success.

I'm not trying to turn this into a looks matter thread, but what I'm saying is when your currently approaching a girl and chatting her up your doing GREAT! I've seen your field reports, etc etc....however once they realize you are trying to pick them up the alarm bell goes off because of the lack of attraction. Attraction happens on many different levels, but if there isn't ANY sort of physical spark no bootcamp, no special line, no Sosuave dogma is going to help you.

When I look at your pictures I see a good looking guy, but a guy who needs to work on HIMSELF first before he can start having success. You go to a dating coach/guru and they will gladly take $1,000 from you to tell you that you can get laid no matter what you look like etc etc. While that's true, its def the minority, rather than the norm. I'm not saying this is you, but really how often do you see a fat, balding man with a super hot girl? And even if you do, do you REALLY THINK that girl is with him because she's solely attracted to him? No, there's something he has that makes him attractive; money, status, celebrity etc.

When I first started in this game I had the opposite problem; I was a skinny 19 year old kid, I needed braces and def needed a new hairstyle and image. So what did I do?? I spent 2 years working on myself. I got into nutrition and weight-lifting, I got braces at 19, I changed my hairstyle, started wearing more form fitting clothing and just from that; BOOM, my vag-ina factor went from a few looks and to OVERWHELMING attention.

And just like a sports team who starts winning, confidence started to grow from within me. I started realizing that I am a catch, girls want me etc etc.

If I ever ran a PUA bootcamp this would be the first thing I would advise to the guys who needed it. You can start seeing success, but right now your failure to address your outside appearance is holding you back.

Look you like these cute Asian girls right? So when one who isn't so good looking shows you attention, are you interested? Probably not.

Its no different for girls, if they have a choice between a guy they are physically attracted to and a guy they aren't really attracted to, guess who they will choose 10 times out of 10 REGARDLESS of his charm, wit, humor etc? Yup, they will ALWAYS choose the guy they are more attracted to...because when you have some level of physical attraction established, then everything else falls in your favor.

A ****y line will get a smirk and maybe the girl will hit the guy playful on the shoulder.

That same ****y line from a guy who they aren't really attracted to will be interpreted as RUDE and demeaning.....it gives them their excuse for why they aren't into you, when the reality is they just aren't attracted to you.


You might have heard that looks get you the interview, but don't get you the job. Well this is very true.

Right now you don't have any interviews lined up, instead you walking in on them trying to schedule them, but no dice.

I'm telling you bro, this lifestyle requires you to put forth your VERY BEST you. Right now, your not your best in my opinion.

Until you change this, the results will stay the same....






PIMP

 

[garruk]

But are you understanding what I'm telling you? Look these sites and learning to be a confident, fun, seductive guy def works and is a great addition to your life, BUT if you have major flaws in your physical presentation it will be VERY DIFFICULT to start seeing success.

I'm not trying to turn this into a looks matter thread, but what I'm saying is when your currently approaching a girl and chatting her up your doing GREAT! I've seen your field reports, etc etc....however once they realize you are trying to pick them up the alarm bell goes off because of the lack of attraction. Attraction happens on many different levels, but if there isn't ANY sort of physical spark no bootcamp, no special line, no Sosuave dogma is going to help you.

When I look at your pictures I see a good looking guy, but a guy who needs to work on HIMSELF first before he can start having success. You go to a dating coach/guru and they will gladly take $1,000 from you to tell you that you can get laid no matter what you look like etc etc. While that's true, its def the minority, rather than the norm. I'm not saying this is you, but really how often do you see a fat, balding man with a super hot girl? And even if you do, do you REALLY THINK that girl is with him because she's solely attracted to him? No, there's something he has that makes him attractive; money, status, celebrity etc.

When I first started in this game I had the opposite problem; I was a skinny 19 year old kid, I needed braces and def needed a new hairstyle and image. So what did I do?? I spent 2 years working on myself. I got into nutrition and weight-lifting, I got braces at 19, I changed my hairstyle, started wearing more form fitting clothing and just from that; BOOM, my vag-ina factor went from a few looks and to OVERWHELMING attention.

And just like a sports team who starts winning, confidence started to grow from within me. I started realizing that I am a catch, girls want me etc etc.

If I ever ran a PUA bootcamp this would be the first thing I would advise to the guys who needed it. You can start seeing success, but right now your failure to address your outside appearance is holding you back.

Look you like these cute Asian girls right? So when one who isn't so good looking shows you attention, are you interested? Probably not.

Its no different for girls, if they have a choice between a guy they are physically attracted to and a guy they aren't really attracted to, guess who they will choose 10 times out of 10 REGARDLESS of his charm, wit, humor etc? Yup, they will ALWAYS choose the guy they are more attracted to...because when you have some level of physical attraction established, then everything else falls in your favor.

A ****y line will get a smirk and maybe the girl will hit the guy playful on the shoulder.

That same ****y line from a guy who they aren't really attracted to will be interpreted as RUDE and demeaning.....it gives them their excuse for why they aren't into you, when the reality is they just aren't attracted to you.


You might have heard that looks get you the interview, but don't get you the job. Well this is very true.

Right now you don't have any interviews lined up, instead you walking in on them trying to schedule them, but no dice.

I'm telling you bro, this lifestyle requires you to put forth your VERY BEST you. Right now, your not your best in my opinion.

Until you change this, the results will stay the same....






PIMP

this is the absolute truth. everyone thinks you say a few lines and a learn a little theory and you can get dime pieces. but that is soo far from the truth.


looks get you the audition and your game will get you the part.

but you need the audition first and from the way pimpscicle talks about oyu, it looks like girls arent even willling to give you a chance.

 

[Iceberg]

I say this because I want you to start having success, not to hate.... but you GOTTA do something with your hair bro.... its not as bad as a older guy's comb-over, but it screams "I'm trying to look cool" when it doesn't.

PIMP

That's the impression that I got too.

It's like you took a collection of "cool" trends and randomly tossed them on.

I'm mainly referring to the pic of you wearing the Adidas shirt. You look like the guy in the club who's trying way too hard.

And I understand you want to look cool, and you want to be "in". But style is about more than wearing the latest trends. It's about being cool in your own skin. Your style is a representation of YOUR personality. Not a bunch of crap that MTV tells you. If you're outdoorsy, find a stylish way to represent that. If you're artistic, be a hipster. If you're preppy, then rock that look. If deep down, you are nerdy....trust me...there is a way to take some thick framed glasses and rock it.

But right now your personality is telling me that you're just a collection of pop culture trends. I can't see what Deicide is about because it's hidden under "cool" spiky hair and "peacocking" shirts.

Just like Pimp said, you can do this thing. It's just a matter of experimenting and finding out what truly expresses the best version of you. It takes time, and I've gone through the same process.

This is one of my favorite blogs right now. It's called The Impossible Cool, and it's a collection of celebrities new and old, and how awesome they look. But look at how they carry their coolness...simplicity. No bright colors. No wacky trends. Just a quiet confidence. Check it out. Maybe you'll see some inspiration.

http://theimpossiblecool.tumblr.com/

 

[cordoncordon]

Shave your hair down to a 1, that haircut is bad. No offense.

Is red/orange your natural color? If not, stop coloring it.

Grow a goatee or facial hair of some sort.

Start doing a heavy/intensified workout program. P 90 X would do wonders for you because you have a decent body to start with.

.........

..........

............

Since you like Asians...

Profit....by banging something like this, (my gf) > http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/233/rose9b.jpg/

 

[Deicide]

But are you understanding what I'm telling you? Look these sites and learning to be a confident, fun, seductive guy def works and is a great addition to your life, BUT if you have major flaws in your physical presentation it will be VERY DIFFICULT to start seeing success.

I'm not trying to turn this into a looks matter thread, but what I'm saying is when your currently approaching a girl and chatting her up your doing GREAT! I've seen your field reports, etc etc....however once they realize you are trying to pick them up the alarm bell goes off because of the lack of attraction. Attraction happens on many different levels, but if there isn't ANY sort of physical spark no bootcamp, no special line, no Sosuave dogma is going to help you.

When I look at your pictures I see a good looking guy, but a guy who needs to work on HIMSELF first before he can start having success. You go to a dating coach/guru and they will gladly take $1,000 from you to tell you that you can get laid no matter what you look like etc etc. While that's true, its def the minority, rather than the norm. I'm not saying this is you, but really how often do you see a fat, balding man with a super hot girl? And even if you do, do you REALLY THINK that girl is with him because she's solely attracted to him? No, there's something he has that makes him attractive; money, status, celebrity etc.

When I first started in this game I had the opposite problem; I was a skinny 19 year old kid, I needed braces and def needed a new hairstyle and image. So what did I do?? I spent 2 years working on myself. I got into nutrition and weight-lifting, I got braces at 19, I changed my hairstyle, started wearing more form fitting clothing and just from that; BOOM, my vag-ina factor went from a few looks and to OVERWHELMING attention.

And just like a sports team who starts winning, confidence started to grow from within me. I started realizing that I am a catch, girls want me etc etc.

If I ever ran a PUA bootcamp this would be the first thing I would advise to the guys who needed it. You can start seeing success, but right now your failure to address your outside appearance is holding you back.

Look you like these cute Asian girls right? So when one who isn't so good looking shows you attention, are you interested? Probably not.

Its no different for girls, if they have a choice between a guy they are physically attracted to and a guy they aren't really attracted to, guess who they will choose 10 times out of 10 REGARDLESS of his charm, wit, humor etc? Yup, they will ALWAYS choose the guy they are more attracted to...because when you have some level of physical attraction established, then everything else falls in your favor.

A ****y line will get a smirk and maybe the girl will hit the guy playful on the shoulder.

That same ****y line from a guy who they aren't really attracted to will be interpreted as RUDE and demeaning.....it gives them their excuse for why they aren't into you, when the reality is they just aren't attracted to you.


You might have heard that looks get you the interview, but don't get you the job. Well this is very true.

Right now you don't have any interviews lined up, instead you walking in on them trying to schedule them, but no dice.

I'm telling you bro, this lifestyle requires you to put forth your VERY BEST you. Right now, your not your best in my opinion.

Until you change this, the results will stay the same....






PIMP

Ok, thanks for the advice once again. Yes, I understand that I need to work on myself to start getting results with women. And yes, through the years a lot of people have said I'm a goofy person. I'm not sure how to get over that hump. I've said this before, but I hate the fact that I'm balding. I'd like to take something to reduce it or stop it to be honest. I like my face to be clean shaven. I got that Adidas shirt when I was in Spain. I'm not really sure where I need to start to get my style down correctly, but I want something that differentiates myself from most people anyways. My natural hair color is black. Maybe the hipster thing could work, I'm not really sure. The fact that I prefer non-white women may need to be taken into account also(Asians, Latinas, and Middle Easterns preferably). I want to put in the work needed(inner game and outer appearance), even though I know it will be a confusing journey.

Thanks for the picture motivation cordon. I've approached Asians with similar looks.

 

[KarmaSutra]

The blunter (this isn't a fvcking word) you are, the more it sinks in. If I was just to say "oh ya bro, you look good. Just maybe do some stuff do your face" it does not sink in as much as what I said. Take care man.

Retardation aside, this is the most homo-erotically charged post I've read in a long time.

It's gay and funny at the same time. Like a blumpkin from Liberace!

Thank you for the laugh SissyFairy.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Look under your belly if you really want a chuckle.

The chicks you've paid to look all have.

Keep posting man, maybe one day your dark green dots will turn light green.

 

[Fred_Scuttle]

I met her after my time at college was done, because I was at the college trying to get my transcripts for grad school. I saw her in a building and started talking to her.
I just opened with "Hey, are you taking summer classes here?" We just talked for a few minutes, and it was mostly me dominating the conversation since she doesn't speak English well. I tried not to qualify myself to her, but I did mention that I had taken a Japanese class. But, she was laughing at a lot of what I was saying, and I teased her about her accent. I got her number, called her in front of her to show her what was my number, then I left. So basically, I don't know how to trigger emotions to start attraction in women. I just had my mind set on asking for a date then, because I felt it was time before she forgot about me. And I know she is meeting Asian men at college that she has more in common with than me. How do I go about qualifying a girl?
The only way I've been able to create attraction is by blindly doing ****y and funny, and giving occasional negs. That's it. Really, I'm still clueless about turning on attraction switches in women.

I will try again with another girl, I'm just tired of this happening all the time with women. It's so frustrating that I struggle to get dates and numbers. I feel lost. I don't see how so many of my friends got into relationships around here.

I'm in good shape but I'm a stocky built guy that is 5'9 and weighs 175. I can get numbers from 6's and 7's, but 8's and above typically don't even want to talk to me when I approach. Here's a recent pic.
http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/121/derekgrad2011.jpg/
http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/52/collegegraduation201105.jpg/

And yes, my face is fuller in the first pic, because exams week, eating out, and a lack of exercise don't do a body good. But, I'm getting back into shape with my boxing classes. I should be down to 165 in no time.

I'm a little confused. If you met her at college then why would she ask you if you were a college student on the phone? Wouldn't she know you are a student also at the college? She met you there. I don't really think that your approach is all that solid like the other fellow said. There is a big difference being just a funny guy getting women to laugh than a guy who can actually attract them by getting them to laugh and creating real attraction in the process. You're getting them to laugh at what you said. You're joking around with them but you're not attracting them. Making fun of her accent might be funny but that isn't creating any real attraction with her. She probably thought that was funny but she wasn't attracted to you. You come off as a goof ball not a guy who is classy that can attract women. Any guy can walk up and open up a woman to make her laugh if you say the right things. It is not that hard if you are telling funny things or making fun. You need to create a spark with her and get the juices flowing in her to create that attraction that gets her going to want to go out with you. That's what you're not doing. You're just being a funny guy kind of a jokester that women brush off as a goofy guy. She had a hard time with English and probably feels more comfortable being with asian men. You can't get a date when you don't actually talk to her except for a brief meeting. Let me say that when you get her hooked she won't forget about you. Also try for a new hair style and go with a brown color. They see you as a joker with the brushed up orange hair. It's the look that makes the man. You need to look good with nice clothes, combed hair, good posture, good build, good attitude, and a confident walk. That is what attracts the ladies. I wouldn't grow any facial hair. Try talking to women at a setting where you have time to get to know her and with women who can speak english well. You cant expect to get dates or numbers from a brief conversation especially when there is no attraction or spark. Look for women in a gym or a place where you have time to get to know them better. I think you are trying to move too fast. You are going for a date when they have nothing for you.