I need to get my head out of my a$$!

[STR8UP]

Anyone else have this problem?

You're out and about, going about your business. You are talking to a woman (waitress, cashier, someone you are doing business with, whoever) but the last thing on your mind is trying to pick up women, when out of the blue, the woman you are talking to throws you a curve and starts to hit on you.

I've never been good with situations like this, and it happened to me twice in the last few days. One was a hottie I was showing a condo to. The other was the cashier at the liquor store today that I started talking to about how I liked the store and would be visiting often She started talking about how she had to work an 11 hour shift today and was ready to go home, then right as I was leaving she says "If I didn't have to work such a long shift I'd be getting your address" (implying that we would have some drinks with the liquor I was buying, I assume). Then she says "Just kidding, hehehe!" and we both laughed as I said goodbye and walked toward the door.

When I got outside I was like "Daaaammmmnnnn....I can't believe I let that sh!t go right over my head!" Chick was joking about wanting to come over (half of every joke is the truth!) and all I could do was laugh it off.

Anyone else have the problem of getting caught off guard and not being able to follow through in this kind of situation?

 

[Throttle]

i can preach it better than live it, but the best advice would be to go straight to the close, everytime. get her phone number. make it a reflex. who cares if you never plan to call?

 

[Vulpine]

Yeah, there's been a few of us around here that have missed some signals.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=13316

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Yo Str8up,


No matter how "hot" you say these chicks were to you in retrospect, I would bet that IF they really were YOUR type of "hot", there would be no way on earth you would miss them giving you buying signals.

Sure, every woman has at least SOMETHING about her that is attractive---if we're willing to look for it. But it's only those women that REALLY suit our tastes that COMMAND our undivided attention.

At least, that has been MY experience.

So, to me, the very fact that you weren't paying attention enough to notice these chicks flirting with you is strong evidence that in your mind, at least on a sub-conscious level, these chicks did NOT register as PRIORITY PURSUIT type chicks.

I'm betting that they were "second choice" chicks at best. But only YOU know for sure.

Think about it...

 

[STR8UP]

Yo Str8up,


No matter how "hot" you say these chicks were to you in retrospect, I would bet that IF they really were YOUR type of "hot", there would be no way on earth you would miss them giving you buying signals.

The first one was hot. And I didn't really miss her signals. Her and her friend were pretty flirty right from the start, you know how you just get a vibe that they are diggin you. Then she started asking if me helping her move was part of the transaction and stuff. I "got it" with this one (I wasn't caught totally by surprise like the other one) but to be honest, with this one she was a prospective tenant so I had to be careful. She called back the next day and left a message saying she WASN'T going to take the property, VERY unusual for someone to do that, so I could probably have called her back and set something up. Probably would have if I had any time available.

The second one had an attractive face but I wasn't paying attention to the body behind the counter and I wasn't gonna give her a head to toe inspection the second she hit on me!

Sure, every woman has at least SOMETHING about her that is attractive---if we're willing to look for it. But it's only those women that REALLY suit our tastes that COMMAND our undivided attention.

Eh, I hate to say I'm not too picky, but fact is that unless I'm looking for something serious I might not even notice that I might be attracted to her unless she makes a move. Then things change and I HAVE to assess my interest level.

So, to me, the very fact that you weren't paying attention enough to notice these chicks flirting with you is strong evidence that in your mind, at least on a sub-conscious level, these chicks did NOT register as PRIORITY PURSUIT type chicks.

I'm betting that they were "second choice" chicks at best. But only YOU know for sure.

Think about it...

You are exactly right. And that's what's appealing to me. I don't have the time, energy, or desire to pursue ANYONE right now. If it's not a "gimme", it ain't happening.

 

[grinder]

Don’t kick yourself too hard. Even though these were obvious most noobs would never notice in the first place.

Now, imagine how many of these slightly more subtle come-on’s we miss and then you really need to kick yourself.

My favorite is when I have the presence of mind to realize the come on and I’m still there with her but my mind is totally blank. The caption balloon over my head is a Marque that reads “I got nuthin…..I got nuthin……I got nuthin….”. LOL

 

[violator]

For me, I have to be in a proper state of mind to pick up on a signal and run with it. If I am to caught up with something, worried, depressed, etc., then I will just blank out.

For example, I remember recently, I was at a check out line in a supermarket when a really hot girl behind me commented on some items she noticed in my basket and said, "Oh, that looks really good" kind of line. I kind of suspected that she was throwing me an opening pick up line. What did i do? Like a schmuck, I just smiled and said nothing. But then, I was having a bad day and just was not in the right mood to sarge. Another time, an equally hot chick offered me a piece of gum alone in an elevator. Again, I was too worried about something that day to run with it and I just said "no thanks" and walked away. Both very hot chicks and two wasted opportunities. They both probably thought I was gay.