I need advice here, i NEED to stick to a decision.

nousername

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Hey guys.

I posted here the other day about my depression and i was on the verge of suicide etc. Them feelings have subsided now and i have been working out everyday and feeling a lot happier with myself, although in that state, I left out important parts that i need to quickly get off my chest and need the answer to this question.
Backstory in point form:

1. Younger brother dated girl, lets call her Mia. Broke up with her and got a new GF, she did the same.

2. Our father passed away, brothers ex-GF family took me and my brother in.

3. Brother moved out, Mia dates me, at the time i was very muscly, probably the most popular guy at my school, very jock-like, arrogant, jerk etc. But honest about intentions with woman, didnt use for sex and lead on.

4. Me and Mia began falling harder and harder. She's younger than me and looks up to me, shes practically IN LOVE with me because shes dating one of the most popular guys in school, and my constant happiness is fun to be around. But i keep the relationship a secret because i dont want to upset my brother.

5. After a while she gets jealous that i still get a lot of attention from woman, and angry at the fact that we aren't telling anyone about the relationship. I start getting angry back at her.

6. It turns into one of them ON-OFF relationships. I "verbally cheat" on her with other girls, she talks to my mates behind my back.

7. The jealousy continues and it comes to the point where i stop working out, stop making myself look good, in order to not get attention from girls, to make her happy.

8. She starts talking to my guy friends behind my back more and more.

9. I get angry at her and we fight more and more. More breakups, more jealousy, getting back at each other.

10. I finally end it when my jealousy gets too much but still cant stop contacting her. Find out she's been talking to my brother again and infact ad sex with him, i get depressed almost kill myself.

11. I get over the feelings, but still miss her, she texts me crying for me back. I tell her not to contact me, but then we both fail, meet up again and have continuous sex.

12. Just tonight i ask her again to come over, she makes an excuse about peroid pain and stomach cramps etc. After she said yes a good 30mins before hand. I know something is up. Call her and say. "I don't care that you're not coming to see me, i just want honesty, just say NO, im seeing someone else, don't be scared to hurt my feelings. Don't disrespect me."

13. She denies it until she tells me my brother is at her house again. I say okay then i will leave you to it, just be honest with not only me but EVERYONE on the future and maybe people will respect you. She is crying to my brother on other end, probably ****ing him.

14. Brother calls me saying that i need to leave her alone because I've hurt her enough. I agree and make him promise me he will be there for her. She lies to him in the background saying she never did anything wrong to me, (we both did wrong.)

15. I send her a final message, being polite asking her not to contact me and to stay positive, my brother will be there for her.

16. No reply as of yet. Although i did ask her to not contact me again and to respect my wishes.




Serious question. I broke up with her, because i feel she was too scared to do it to me, because she was too insecure. Because if she wasn't she still wouldn't come around and have sex after i did it right?

My question. Should i seriously just go NC on her? She's only young, 17, as am i, but i don't want her to go all suicidal and ****.

I need opinions. I fvcking care about her, and to not talk to her would seem VERY hard to do. It's almost impossible it seems, because she always keeps running back to me!

Remember, i have treated her bad, and apologised for it all, and she's never apologised to me, for what she's done.

I need to go through with this NC but it's VERY hard.
 

nousername

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If you can see things start to go wrong when i respond to her jealousy of me talking to other girls etc and make myself look less better, in order for her to feel happier..

Is this where i started giving her power and showing no self-respect? I think i stopped acting like an alpha. Because before hand i resembled the care-free attitude of Brad Pitt in Fight Club.

In the future with other women, should i just say something like:

"If me looking good and getting attraction from other girls, is making you jealous, then you need to sort out these feelings because I'm not making myself any worse to keep you happy."

I feel like maybe i should have taken this route, my instincts were telling me at the time, but i was also depressed as-well. Maybe she unknowingly took advantage of that. She's only young, 17.
 

nousername

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I'm making excuses for her now. **** i just need a good slap to the face.
 

RagingBalls

Senior Don Juan
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You need to fix yourself dude. You're unsure of what you want. You liked her and she's desperate to be with you. The point here is you liked her. If you didn't, you wouldn't ask for any advice. Same with women, for all they care if you castrate yourself to death if they don't like you either. Don't be a hypocrite and lie to yourself... you miss her

What's worse than a girl who knows what she wants but can't have it, is a man who doesn't know what he wants...yet can have it.

Dumping a girl thinking she can't do it for herself is an epic gargantuan stupidity on your part. Why? because there's no such thing.


You really need to fix yourself and get your brain checked.
 
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