I KINDA Cheated...

[Daniel1099]

Me and this girl started talking and we were definitiely into each other...

at first we were cool with not having that title of being Boyfriend Girlfriend....

so i was like ok...

i had a party at my house...i started making out with a girl. suckin tities, she gave me head...this girl is her friend...

people start finding out...now im SCREWED

So now i feel guilty because i really like the First girl...

i meet up with her, and tell her the truth before it came from someones elses mouth...

now she wont talk to me, and is REALLY mad....i want to fix things.

WTF should i do? wait?

 

[Warrior74]

Me and this girl started talking and we were definitiely into each other...

at first we were cool with not having that title of being Boyfriend Girlfriend....

so i was like ok...

i had a party at my house...i started making out with a girl. suckin tities, she gave me head...this girl is her friend...

people start finding out...now im SCREWED

So now i feel guilty because i really like the First girl...

i meet up with her, and tell her the truth before it came from someones elses mouth...

now she wont talk to me, and is REALLY mad....i want to fix things.

WTF should i do? wait?

You are a dater, not a PUA, not a DJ, not a Player, mack or pimp. I won't stoop so low as to call you an afc. Daters date one girl at a time and feel guilty about being with more than one.

You didn't cheat, she's not your girlfriend.

Why are you confessing? Let her hear about it...it might up her interest, it might lower it, but confessing is weak man behavior. Do you think a mob boss would confess to his wife he cheated, or bill clinton, or any man of power? She's not talking to you because you slept with someone else,she's not talking to you because you are weak.

There is nothing else to do but grow a pair, learn from this and next time keep your women separated. If you would have handled this like a player you could have denied it and her friend would have denied it to spare her feelings.

What to do. Nothing. Move on. Let her call you (she probably won't) go date some other women. Good luck.

 

[mothballs]

I'll take the other road...

Next time keep your **** in your pants.

 

[Daniel1099]

if i care about this girl im not just going to move on...

i ****ed up and she was GOING to find out.

im not going to lie to her face. what would our relationship be if i did?

im going to play this girl if i really like her...

playing is easy if you dont care about the girls...

yes i could of denyed it and whent on. but what would be the point??

i want her to forgive me and give me another chance...

if she did this **** to me, i would DEF next her ass....

How would you guys handle this if you still want the girl?

bill clinton is a fukin idiot who probably has a ****ty marriage,

mod bosses have morals that are so fuked up its not even funny

 

[TheBucketOfTruth]

You weren't in a relationship so there should be no reason for you to feel guilty or confess anything. The fact that you came crying to her about what you had done only gave her license to be angry since you clearly saw something wrong with it. You screwed up.

I know you're trying to proceed from this point, but I have no advice for you. You can say "Look I was drunk at a party, and we weren't in a relationship. If you want me all to yourself, then try and make that arrangement." It's tough for you to say something like this after how you already approached it though (it would be completely incongruent). Any other type of pleading, begging, or apologizing isn't going to get you anywhere. You'd be better off just not trying to initiate contact with her in any way at all.

PS: As for the "lying" comment, not mentioning something is not the same thing as lying. I am all for honesty, so if she asked you about it you would be honest. Bringing it up in the first place, unsolicited is what I have a problem with.

 

[Daniel1099]

no she asked me what i did at the party...she knows i made out with a girl and that was it...she didnt know who or what...
but people were starting to talk about the whole thing and i didnt want her finding out through someone else....

just because we dont have a title doesnt meen were not in a relationship...

 

[drak_ool]

agree with what Warrior say

I would emphasize the aspect of "deny till you die." You can admit something vague (a girl wouldn't get off me, or something along those lines) but only after she questions you. You can always contradict what other pple are saying, and if she points out to you her friends said otherwise you bring up the "who do you believe more?" discussion, and then act mad at the thought that she even dared to doubt you

Now the power is back in your hands...

 

[Frog X]

If you dont have a title, then there is no exclusive relationship.

To me that means when Im around her Im with her, but when Im not, Im free to do what I want.

I think you should have let it play out then deny deny deny.

 

[Daniel1099]

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[Daniel1099]

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[Daniel1099]

SHEEEIITT!!

hella true Frog....its just **** get outs. and i ****en hate denying.

but i guess DENY TILL YOU DIE.

cuz i got this other girl thats just as cute talking to me...and im def thinking about hookin up with her...

i just dont know if that would be the right thing to do if i really like this other girl

nah meen?

 

[Captain]

Me and this girl started talking and we were definitiely into each other...

at first we were cool with not having that title of being Boyfriend Girlfriend....

so i was like ok...

i had a party at my house...i started making out with a girl. suckin tities, she gave me head...this girl is her friend...

people start finding out...now im SCREWED

So now i feel guilty because i really like the First girl...

i meet up with her, and tell her the truth before it came from someones elses mouth...

You have a chump mentality. You did nothing wrong. It's not cheating if you haven't agreed to be exclusive.

now she wont talk to me, and is REALLY mad....i want to fix things.

Totally the wrong mindset to have, that's a chump mindset. You did nothing wrong, you have nothing to fix. Ignore her, and if she is attracted to you, she will be back.

 

[playerone]

I can understand what you're thinking, Daniel. You just feel that you really like this girl, and you don't want the fact that you made out with another woman behind her back to affect your future with her. But you must realise that you are not committed to her yet. And before you have made your decision to be committed to her, you can do whatever you want out there. If i were you, I wouldn't have confessed. If you feel that you want to go into an actual relationship with this girl, then go ahead. You have done nothing wrong as this was all done before you two were in a relationship.

 

[DonGorgon]

welcome to doing what 99% of humans do.. you will be ok and do it many more times..lol

 

[Daniel1099]

im agreeing with Captain.

i will ignore. if she is still into me. then she will hit me up.

if not. il shoot her a text in a month and see whats up.

 

[Vypros]

Me and this girl started talking and we were definitiely into each other...

at first we were cool with not having that title of being Boyfriend Girlfriend....

so i was like ok...

i had a party at my house...i started making out with a girl. suckin tities, she gave me head...this girl is her friend...

people start finding out...now im SCREWED

So now i feel guilty because i really like the First girl...

i meet up with her, and tell her the truth before it came from someones elses mouth...

now she wont talk to me, and is REALLY mad....i want to fix things.

WTF should i do? wait?

Ok, here is the deal....

There is not such thing as "kinda" cheating. You either cheated or you didn't. Now I'm not going to speculate on it, because I have no idea based on what you've said whether you were exclusive or not. It SOUNDS to me like you were exclusive, but she just didn't like the phrasing of "bf/gf," but that really makes no fvcking sense so....lol

My point? The first thing you need to do is decide if you were exclusive or not. If you need help, maybe you should get with her and discuss it and tell her that you didn't think you were exclusive (i.e. instead of asking us, go TALK TO HER).

You need to be honest with yourself though. Whatever you decide will dictate what you should do. But get that idea of "kinda" cheating out of your head. You either did or you didn't. Make that determination first. Then come back to us and tell us what you got.

 

[Daniel1099]

It SOUNDS to me like you were exclusive, but she just didn't like the phrasing of "bf/gf," but that really makes no fvcking sense so....lol

thats exactly how it is.

we may not have been OFFICIALLY exclusive.

but she still feels like she has been betrayed and i feel guilty...which is what happens when someone cheats on someone else in an OFFICIAL relationship...

 

[Warrior74]

thats exactly how it is.

we may not have been OFFICIALLY exclusive.

but she still feels like she has been betrayed and i feel guilty...which is what happens when someone cheats on someone else in an OFFICIAL relationship...

Okay. I see you are a good boy. Nothing wrong with that. Some of us are not. Oh wait, you cheated...your not a good boy are you?

If you cared about her so much, why did you fvck her friend? HER FRIEND? You should know to never sleep with a woman's friends. That's game 101. I mean you seriously thought that would have no consequences? Gonna blame it on the alcohol? You've done the deed man. You can't undo it. All you can do is proceed with either strength or weakness and we know which one you chose.

LAW 28 - ENTER ACTION WITH BOLDNESS

If you are unsure of a course of action, do not attempt it. Your doubts and hesitations will infect your execution. Timidity is dangerous: Better to enter with boldness. Any mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity. Everyone admires the bold; no one honors the timid.

Think about this. How could you have presented this to her in a way to make her feel something different? Think off all the things, that are true that you could have said to her. If I could give you an assignment I would have you write out what else you could have said to salvage this. Because honestly you could have, but you did it wrong at the point of confession. Remember this always...women don't have sympathy for weak men. A woman would rather you be a heartless bastard who warms up and changes for her than a spineless bastard who begs and pleads to her...she can't respect a man who is on his knees begging her for forgiveness. You put yourself below her, which is why she walked.

 

[DJDamage]

if i care about this girl im not just going to move on...

i ****ed up and she was GOING to find out.

im not going to lie to her face. what would our relationship be if i did?

im going to play this girl if i really like her...

playing is easy if you dont care about the girls...

yes i could of denyed it and whent on. but what would be the point??

i want her to forgive me and give me another chance...

if she did this **** to me, i would DEF next her ass....

How would you guys handle this if you still want the girl?

bill clinton is a fukin idiot who probably has a ****ty marriage,

mod bosses have morals that are so fuked up its not even funny

You already fvcked up twice. There is no "kinda cheated", you cheated because you wanted too. So the reason you spilled your guts to this girl was because you believed she was going to find out, PLEASE SPARE ME THE MORALISTS LECTURE. Also you could have stopped anytime when you frisked her best friend but you didn't, so don't call Bill Clinton a scum after you basically did the exact same thing.

As Warrior already said "grow a pair". This chick didn't satistfied all your needs so you wanted to mess around with another girl, big fvcking deal.

Now the worst thing you could have possibly done at that point was confess before she could have accused you. Now you made yourself look like a weak grovelling child instead of playing it cool and denying everything until she accuses you or find some hard evidance. If she does then you go to plan B and blame it on her for your cheating and tell her that you are disgusted by her accusations and you are going to be leaving her unless she appologizes to you and then walk out.

Yes it may sound immoral and it may be dirty but that advice I gave you was the best advice to keep your relationship going. You think she won't hold it against you if she accepts you back when you acted like a b1tch?! forget about it.

The best advice I could give you right now for your situation in which you won't listen is that you dump your girl and move onto her friend.

 

[CatB]

You guys kept your relationship so fuzzy and undefined that there's nothing but trouble that's going to come of it.

You have now set the definition as "you are not important enough to me to be monogamous with".

Girls can take that sort of thing - really, we can - but we get super pissed when the definition comes in the form of you getting head. From a friend of ours.

That makes us feel cheap in your eyes.

It also makes you look weak. Why didn't you have the balls to set boundaries or freedoms earlier? Were you afraid that she was going to see another guy? Or were you just not man enough to know what you were looking for?

If (when) she finds out, she'll probably get angry / sad / mortified or some combination. If she walks out then and there, I can't say I'd blame her.

But it's not because you 'cheated'. It's because you didn't act like a man.