i just lost my sh!T - scarcity mindset

[Packers2010]

i met this girl who worked at a coffee shop last year sometime. she gave me coffee while i worked a few shopps down. she was cool, so one day i got her number. we texted a bit and i found out she is pretty much a **** tease.

so i just left it at what it was. so the other day i was on a dating site and saw her on siad dating site.

so got a convo going with her and reminded her who I was. we started to talking and i said something i forget what, though her answer was. " oh it's ok i'm just happy with my guy friends"

at this point i just lost my ****, i was like. why the **** am i talking to you then? like honestly it was like a slap in the face. it was like " i have better option then you. i have guys drooling over my loose pVssy and so i don't need your beta ass"

i just started yelling at her. it really got under my skin.

the thing is. i should have seen this coming, i mean. lately i have been so stuck in the scarcity mindset, that it's fooking up my game ( if i even had any)

so my question is how do you re-frame the scarcity mindset?

I've been having trouble getting my head around the idea that, your there to get the skills and not the girl but I've been so horny as of late that i just want to **** something ( that's why i joined the dating site) but it's not happing fast enough. ( which i know it shouldn't) i just need some words of wisdom to help me overcome this.

 

[JumpOff]

i met this girl who worked at a coffee shop last year sometime. she gave me coffee while i worked a few shopps down. she was cool, so one day i got her number. we texted a bit and i found out she is pretty much a **** tease.

Red flag #1 in bold.

so i just left it at what it was. so the other day i was on a dating site and saw her on siad dating site.

so got a convo going with her and reminded her who I was. we started to talking and i said something i forget what, though her answer was. " oh it's ok i'm just happy with my guy friends"

You didn't leave it at that. She obviously got to you with said "**** tease", so you contacted her to try and get your ego back.

at this point i just lost my ****, i was like. why the **** am i talking to you then? like honestly it was like a slap in the face. it was like " i have better option then you. i have guys drooling over my loose pVssy and so i don't need your beta ass"

Why the fvck are you talking to her? Are you trying to be another one of her "guys friends"?

i just started yelling at her. it really got under my skin.

Ouch. She got to you that bad? If you where doing what you were supposed to be doing, you'd dead this girl and move on to the next one.

the thing is. i should have seen this coming, i mean. lately i have been so stuck in the scarcity mindset, that it's fooking up my game ( if i even had any)
so my question is how do you re-frame the scarcity mindset?

You re-frame the scarcity mindset by going out there and making YOURSELF less scarce. Woman are out there. Everywhere. Beautiful, intelligent woman waiting to be fvcked. Approach. Fail. Approach again. The law averages will eventually be on your side.

I've been having trouble getting my head around the idea that, your there to get the skills and not the girl but I've been so horny as of late that i just want to **** something ( that's why i joined the dating site) but it's not happing fast enough. ( which i know it shouldn't) i just need some words of wisdom to help me overcome this.

If your just looking to fvck, then find a "slump buster". If your looking for a quality woman to fvck, then it SHOULD and WILL take some effort. As you've heard a million of times on this site, a woman ALWAYS has options. An attractive QUALITY woman has an almost INFINITE number of options. It's up to you to distinguish yourself from the other guy's who are vying for her time.

 

[Packers2010]

Why the fvck are you talking to her? Are you trying to be another one of her "guys friends"?

no, i've just become really desprate of late. plus i was just seeing what she was up too.

Ouch. She got to you that bad? If you where doing what you were supposed to be doing, you'd dead this girl and move on to the next one.

it's more the fact i am desperate. not that it was HER

thanks for the advice man. i do need to get out there a lot more.

 

[synergy1]

You re-frame the scarcity mindset by going out there and making YOURSELF less scarce. Woman are out there. Everywhere. Beautiful, intelligent woman waiting to be fvcked. Approach. Fail. Approach again. The law averages will eventually be on your side.



If your just looking to fvck, then find a "slump buster". If your looking for a quality woman to fvck, then it SHOULD and WILL take some effort. As you've heard a million of times on this site, a woman ALWAYS has options. An attractive QUALITY woman has an almost INFINITE number of options. It's up to you to distinguish yourself from the other guy's who are vying for her time.

I myself am/was in a similar situation where the scarcity mindset was a game killer. It makes you pursue women that one would ordinarily not, and subsequently puts them on a pedestal. Game over once a women becomes a focus of attention.

Think of it this way, a women has options because she doesn't really want to pursue any one option. If a brad pitt came along, she would shut those options down or at least distance herself from said options. However, this isn't going to happen but she will be under the guise that it could. Its the same mentality that keeps poor people believing that they will somehow be better off by doing what they have been doing. Remember, a women is just as frustrated as as a guy in the sense that they do not have the options that they want, just as a guy might not be able to attract the kind of women he wants. Women do not take initiative as often, so they must live with their options whereas a proactive guy has a say in his destiny.

Its as the poster said , there are women out there. Once you realize this, than your scarcity mindset will go away. Toss in some patience, and preserverence, and you'll be on your way to have some success. Divorce your desire to have sex a little bit as this will ease the desperation factor, and go out there and have fun. This above all else (at least for me) is how I get the most positive attention from women. Its not about focusing on game, aesthetics etc, its about being a fun person who isn't desperate for women's attention. Once women realize it must be them who should qualify to you and not the other way around, you'll have more success.

In summary:

1- women aren't scarce.

2- a women with options is as desperate as a man without options in certain situations

3- get out there and own life, and women will follow.

 

[Buddha_Mind]

Lol I don't blame you on snapping some self-absorbed cvnt. Yeah sure she has no problem having 10+ AFC satellites -- anytime she wants a bang or some attention she's got her pool of dudes.

Block that bish. Forgive yourself for flipping out. Next time screen them better. I feel you on scarcity...it can poison the mind...make you desperate...lead to habitual masturbation and a sort of self-placation...agghhhh


The way I re-frame the scarcity mindset is this;

-- Focus on what you can be doing now to elevate yourself. To empower yourself. A degree, going to the gym, a new skillset--anything that will broaden your LIFE options. The focus now should be BUILDING YOURSELF. You can then move anywhere in the world. So view this as a TEMPORARY time -- focus on your GOALS and soon you'll be somewhere else. That's how I see my current place. This isn't the place I'm meant to live for 5-10 years. This is a place I'm meant to grow and move on from. There will be a new place where I land where women will be plenty. Right now is about ME so that I'm READY for them when I get there!

See what I'm sayin?

Women aren't the prize. Living your life happy is the prize. The woman is the addition and will make it that much better. Focusing just on the puss is going to leave you at the bottom of the barrel. Get yourself where you want to be and the puss will be there. Maybe even someone who cares for u more than just sex. (because look at all you've done with your life by then, right?)