I have a phobia, im scared of heights! HELP!

[bigshot]

Fellow DJ's,

I have been the dj bible for a few weeks now, Im 18 and I am at the stage of my training where i hang out with chicks regularly, nothing serious but im taking one step at a time.

Now when it comes to hanging out, there are several places to go, one of them being theme parks, it has been recommended by many people as it is a good place to have fun).
However i'm fvckin sh!t scared of heights, so im too afraid to go on any high rides.
Its embarassing as i want to be the alpha male and i dont think i will get that image if people see that i have a weakness. I don't go on high roller coasters, or even sky diving when a group of friends ask me. I want to go to a theme park and have a good time just like anyone else but this phobia prevents me.


Any advice on how i can tackle this or even how i can eliminate it altogether so i can no longer be afraid of heights?
Any advice from someone who has been cured from another phobia would be most welcome too.

Thanks for reading this!

 

[bigappledj]

Don't go to the theme parks. At 18 you want to act at least 30. The girls you are dating would prefer a 30 year old guy over 18. They want a man, not a boy. The flying saucer ride won't cut it. If you were 35 and dating an 18 year old you might want to try stuff like that. At 18 you want to demonstrate your maturity. If not you are still a little boy while she desires a man. I have never known an 18 year old who likes being thought of as an 18 year old. If you tell an 18 year old that you thought they were 22 they are as elated as a turd who has just signed up for a new dj course.

If you are friends with her friends I would dump her and start fresh. You want to distance your life from her life. People want what they think they can't have. If you are just another boy in her pack she will always be looking to find something new and fresh.

The only reason those books mention theme parks is because most wannabe dj's can't carry a conversation. If that is you I think you should start reading more and exploring a wide variety of interests. Her focus should be on you, not the slip and slide at the park.

 

[Mr.Positive]

I think theme parks are good dates. I prefer action dates myself.

I used to have a huge fear of heights. You have to challenge your fear to over come it. Skydiving, for the most part, cured that fear. I still had a fear of ledges though, so I then took up rock climbing. After a few crazy climbs, I can honestly say I have no fear of heights whatsoever.

Challenge your fears Bigshot!! Just challenge them as safe as possible..

 

[pickupsticks]

The instinctive part of your brain is convinced that riding the roller coaster will kill you. The only way to convince it otherwise is to ride the roller coaster and prove it wrong.

Take it step by step, and focus only on the step you are at. First, go to the park. Then get in the line. Then sit in the seat and put on the restraints.

During this whole process you will be having a conversation with yourself inside your head. Tell yourself over and over that nothing bad will happen because everyone else has survived this ride. Tell yourself that you need to overcome this fear in order to accomplish your goals. We evolved the capacity to reason so that we could overide instincts. This is how we tamed fire and built civilization.

You may also experience some physical reactions to fear. Remember to take deep breaths to get the oxygen to your brain that you need to focus. Your muscles may be clenched. Relax them, physical soreness only adds to the discomfort. There is usually a weird feeling in your chest and stomach too. Just deal with this one. You may also have to go to the bathroom. Go before you get in the line so you don't have to deal with it mentally later. Your body is trying to make itself lighter so it can escape predators. It is important to understand your body's natural reaction to fear, for later when scary life things happen that can actually hurt you.

It took me around 30 jumps from 14,000 ft to get over my fear of heights. I was scared ****less every single time until then. Remember that no matter what your body is telling you, you are the one who decides what to make it do. It is a duty of men to confront their fears.

 

[penkitten]

you could say you have heart problems and can not go on those rides.

 

[bigshot]

Don't go to the theme parks. At 18 you want to act at least 30. The girls you are dating would prefer a 30 year old guy over 18.

Although you maybe right, theme parks are a fun and enjoyable date and is a normal place to go to have fun for pretty much all ages. A woman would prefer a confident, out-going guy.

Challenge your fears Bigshot!! Just challenge them as safe as possible

That was very motivational! Thanks!

Take it step by step, and focus only on the step you are at. First, go to the park. Then get in the line. Then sit in the seat and put on the restraints.

This will be the hardest part as the ride itself will be over in less than a minute but the waiting and fighting the fear will take absolutely ages.

you could say you have heart problems and can not go on those rides.

Haha, believe me i have used that excuse before, and many others too. i just felt like more of a wally using them, now i have recently started telling people straight-up that im scared of heights. But i know this may not work to my advantage with my peers, i just thought fvck it, everyone else has fears so why do i have to keep lying?!

 

[dot]

The instinctive part of your brain is convinced that riding the roller coaster will kill you. The only way to convince it otherwise is to ride the roller coaster and prove it wrong.

Take it step by step, and focus only on the step you are at. First, go to the park. Then get in the line. Then sit in the seat and put on the restraints.

During this whole process you will be having a conversation with yourself inside your head. Tell yourself over and over that nothing bad will happen because everyone else has survived this ride. Tell yourself that you need to overcome this fear in order to accomplish your goals. We evolved the capacity to reason so that we could overide instincts. This is how we tamed fire and built civilization.

You may also experience some physical reactions to fear. Remember to take deep breaths to get the oxygen to your brain that you need to focus. Your muscles may be clenched. Relax them, physical soreness only adds to the discomfort. There is usually a weird feeling in your chest and stomach too. Just deal with this one. You may also have to go to the bathroom. Go before you get in the line so you don't have to deal with it mentally later. Your body is trying to make itself lighter so it can escape predators. It is important to understand your body's natural reaction to fear, for later when scary life things happen that can actually hurt you.

It took me around 30 jumps from 14,000 ft to get over my fear of heights. I was scared ****less every single time until then. Remember that no matter what your body is telling you, you are the one who decides what to make it do. It is a duty of men to confront their fears.

except people always get ****ed up at theme parks. The latest thing was a girl and her foot gettin chopped off.

I've been scared of heights my whole life. It does get better though. You know how you get up real high, wait a while, and it's a lot better? Same thing happens. When I was young I used to even be scared and dizzy when I was at the top of the stadium/arena (granted it is steep, but still). Now I can go to the same arena and I won't be scared. I've only been there 5 times maybe.

I went on 4 rides or more when I went to Six Flags, I didn't feel any better. After I went on the "scariest" one (only the drop above the highway and parking lot was scary), I still didn't wanna go back on it.

 

[bigshot]

I've been scared of heights my whole life. It does get better though. You know how you get up real high, wait a while, and it's a lot better? Same thing happens. When I was young I used to even be scared and dizzy when I was at the top of the stadium/arena (granted it is steep, but still). Now I can go to the same arena and I won't be scared. I've only been there 5 times maybe.

Yeah thats the same for me, when i was a kid i wouldnt go on cable cars or the 'london eye' but now its ok im not afraid although the thought is always at the back of my head. Now i've got to conquer roller coasters, sky diving & parasailing.

 

[KarmaSutra]

Fvck that. I too used to be horrified of heights. So bad I would not drive over the Sunshine skyway bridge to hit up St. Pete.

But, like any learned behaviour, I had to force myself to accept it and defeat it. I started out with only minor heights like the top of Tampa International parking garage. I went to the ledge and forced myself to look over the edge for 15 minutes until the sickly, drained feeling washed over me. Then I walked over the Howard Franklin bridge in Tampa. Now I don't have too much of an issue with heights.