I feel like I can be replaced at any moment

[flipflip]

So I dated a girl last year and every date was great. We made out and she seemed to really like me. She was just average looking but I was thrilled to be dating her. And then out of the blue she pretty much just ghosted me. I didn't do anything to scare her off. It really sucked bc I really liked her. Even though I'm average looking I don't have much confidence with women bc on tinder and IG the only girls who liked me were either ugly or overweight.

I'm not really sure how to proceed. I feel like these days the best course of action would be to just plate women but I dont really enjoy that. I used to think I wanted to hook up with lots of women but after doing it twice it felt like I was just using their body to masturbate. I'd really like to be in a relationship but women have so many options I feel like it could all just end at any random moment. I don't want to give up but its a lot of work just to find a girl and then its depressing af when she just leaves for no reason.

 

[flipflip]

Most people here are in the same boat. You get used to it. Its a little shocking compared to the past because it was the men doing what the women are doing now.

I'm just not sure how to proceed. Going mgtow is lonely but peaceful. Dating can be like I'm on a high one moment and an extreme low the next.

 

[flipflip]

Keep dating but invest less it any one outcome

Yeah this is probably the best answer but it's easier said than done. I tend to fall in love really fast lol (not by choice)

 

[Dr.Suave]

Just chill. Stuff like this will happen, its part of the game. Keep meeting girls until u find someone that not only you like a lot, but she likes u even more so she wont ghost u. U still very young little bro.

 

[flipflip]

Just chill. Stuff like this will happen, its part of the game. Keep meeting girls until u find someone that not only you like a lot, but she likes u even more so she wont ghost u. U still very young little bro.

The thing that messed with me was this girl seemed to really like me. She seemed just as excited as me to hang out. As soon as I'd call or text she'd be down. Also the way she looked at me too seemed like she really liked me which made no sense when she ghosted

 

[flipflip]

Scarcity mentality

True but I don't get any matches with women I'm attracted to online. I have better luck with cold approach but it's a lot harder than just messaging a girl online

 

[Modern Man Advice]

So I dated a girl last year and every date was great. We made out and she seemed to really like me. She was just average looking but I was thrilled to be dating her. And then out of the blue she pretty much just ghosted me. I didn't do anything to scare her off. It really sucked bc I really liked her. Even though I'm average looking I don't have much confidence with women bc on tinder and IG the only girls who liked me were either ugly or overweight.

I'm not really sure how to proceed. I feel like these days the best course of action would be to just plate women but I dont really enjoy that. I used to think I wanted to hook up with lots of women but after doing it twice it felt like I was just using their body to masturbate. I'd really like to be in a relationship but women have so many options I feel like it could all just end at any random moment. I don't want to give up but its a lot of work just to find a girl and then its depressing af when she just leaves for no reason.

I have said this before, and I will not stop saying this, but if you are looking to meet quality women on these platforms, you are in for a heck of a ride. Likewise, if you are looking to build confidence in yourself and in your "game" you are also wasting your time on these platforms.

OLD make men lazy, some women entitled, and cultivates the wrong mindset about intergender dynamics. Not sure how else to paint it but some men do realize this and avoid it. It would help you start doing the same.

These types of toxic behaviors are extremely common in OLD. Why? Because simply put, OLD highlights a Bonobo masturbation society. Do not take it personally, this is simply a reflection of her mindset. A mindset cultivated by OLD.

Now, if like some members here, you simply want sex (and you are p***y whipped) then go ahead and continue using OLD. But do not expect much more than just a Bonobo masturbation (masturbating with someone else's body) interaction.

Hope this makes sense.


Modern Man Advice

 

[SargeMaximus]

You actually did do something wrong that she sensed: you felt lucky to be dating her. Pedestalizing

 

[roaming shark]

All of us have been rejected by someone we like a lot. Welcome to the game.

 

[kavi]

So I dated a girl last year and every date was great. We made out and she seemed to really like me. She was just average looking but I was thrilled to be dating her. And then out of the blue she pretty much just ghosted me. I didn't do anything to scare her off. It really sucked bc I really liked her. Even though I'm average looking I don't have much confidence with women bc on tinder and IG the only girls who liked me were either ugly or overweight.

I'm not really sure how to proceed. I feel like these days the best course of action would be to just plate women but I dont really enjoy that. I used to think I wanted to hook up with lots of women but after doing it twice it felt like I was just using their body to masturbate. I'd really like to be in a relationship but women have so many options I feel like it could all just end at any random moment. I don't want to give up but its a lot of work just to find a girl and then its depressing af when she just leaves for no reason.

Why are you thrilled to be dating her? Is it validation?

For most men and guys the problem seems to be that they dont really ENJOY spending time with women or going through any of this process, but it is all about outcome dependence, validation and proving oneself. When men take the latter approach they do not learn to enjoy spending time with women and womens company. When you enjoy spending time with women and their company you learn to bring value to the table, and are less likely to be ghosted. If you learn to enjoy spending time with women then if you lose one you just go into the presence of women to seek that out again (socialising, dating, maybe cold-approaching, etc).

This society and cultural set up is just a manipulation of men. For the average man is superior to the average women in most ways naturally, only society manipulates him into being by way of seeking validation, so it is always a benefit to a woman to be spending time with a man on her level, but the man sees as it as a win for himself, seeing the woman as a prize that validates him.

Learn how to enjoy interaction and time spent with women. Learn to recognise you superiority over them, they will try to hide that part of your masculinity that they recognise as superior to themselves, they will 'game' you to make you believe they are above you, but learn to see beneath that frame and then you can see how you are superior to them, then that thing you will recognise more and more and cultivate it.

Then you know that msculinity within you that women secretly value, you can build it up over time as you grow older and it just a case of being in the presence of women and getting some acknowledgement of that which will make you happy. Everything else will follow naturally.

 

[EyeBRollin]

OP you have to build yourself up to a position where you are superior to most women. They have to admire and respect you. That means get rich (or at least a 6 figure income.. pretty much the bare minimum expectation for women in 2022), get fit, and get a sense of style. Confidence comes naturally with those three. Then women will view you as a primary option rather than a backup. Right now you are their backup.

As for looks that really is just a function of height, fitness, hygiene, and clothes. The latter 3 are all within your control.

 

[flipflip]

I have said this before, and I will not stop saying this, but if you are looking to meet quality women on these platforms, you are in for a heck of a ride. Likewise, if you are looking to build confidence in yourself and in your "game" you are also wasting your time on these platforms.

OLD make men lazy, some women entitled, and cultivates the wrong mindset about intergender dynamics. Not sure how else to paint it but some men do realize this and avoid it. It would help you start doing the same.

These types of toxic behaviors are extremely common in OLD. Why? Because simply put, OLD highlights a Bonobo masturbation society. Do not take it personally, this is simply a reflection of her mindset. A mindset cultivated by OLD.

Now, if like some members here, you simply want sex (and you are p***y whipped) then go ahead and continue using OLD. But do not expect much more than just a Bonobo masturbation (masturbating with someone else's body) interaction.

Hope this makes sense.


Modern Man Advice

I met the girl who I dated and then got ghosted by in person

 

[Genetic Error]

Honestly dont know what to do either. Even the below average woman has so many options

 

[Modern Man Advice]

I met the girl who I dated and then got ghosted by in person

Thanks for the clarification. In that case, my advice would be to simply try to be present so you can fully enjoy whatever experiences you get to be part of. Nothing lasts forever. And this is especially true for dating (intergender dynamics). OLD def highlights it, but it is a reality regardless. Some people simply have lost the courage to follow through and commit if that is something you see value in.

Being present allows you to enjoy the moment for YOU sake and take from it as much as the experience allows. And like I said before, never take anything personally. That is one of my mantras. Be firm in your beliefs, in the path you walk on, in who you are. Do not BE for the sake of validation and acceptance. BE for the sake of self-fulfillment and self-mastery.


Modern Man Advice

 

[Hamurabimbi]

It’s so variable. I’ve had girls who’ve dumped me & vanished from my life. To girls, who even years and years after our break up, refuse to let go and want to ‘try again’. This V-day. Already got text/Snaps from a few ex-s. I’d say. There’s no hard & fast rule. But, if you give her good dvck, she’ll become addicted.

 

[MatureDJ]

You deal with it by being stoic and hardening your heart.

 

[MatureDJ]

True but I don't get any matches with women I'm attracted to online. I have better luck with cold approach but it's a lot harder than just messaging a girl online

Have you thought about going after fat chicks?

 

[flipflip]

Have you thought about going after fat chicks?

I'm not gonna be with someone I'm not attracted to lol

 

[corrector]

The worst part is these women just move on quickly.

 

[zekko]

I'm not really sure how to proceed. I feel like these days the best course of action would be to just plate women but I dont really enjoy that. I used to think I wanted to hook up with lots of women but after doing it twice it felt like I was just using their body to masturbate.

I agree the plate spinning route can be unsatisfying. The alternative is the LTR, which can get a little boring, but is more satisfying IMO. I prefer the latter. Otherwise you're just on a never ending treadmill.