i dont get how you guys get flaked on so much?

[garruk]

i dont close as many numbers as you guys, maybe 3 or 4 a month. basically 1 a week because i generally only go out on weekends.


but every time i get a number. I almost ALWAYS get a resulting date during the week.

typical routine for me:
1) go out with my co-workers or college friends on the weekend. meet new girl at club/bar or meet a girl brought along by said co-workers/friends

2) hang out with said girl during the night, and try to upgrade if there is a better girl out there. first chance to upgrade...take it and hang out with cuter girl asap.

3)i dont bother switching girls after 12, becuase i usually go home at like 1:30 and i feel like i need at least an hour to get physical (kino or dancing) and have a decent conversation

4) text or facebook the next day, something incredibly neutral. she always replies. tell her im busy and that ill call her later.

5) call to arrange a date on monday or tuesday. usually happy hour after work, but last week i met a girl on friday and then we went hiking on sunday.

6) i almost always have a second date for thursday or she comes out with me again the following weekendin which case i f-close at least 85% of the time.




i dont see where the flaking is coming from? i htink you guys maybe arent spending enough time with them when you meet them? sometimes i meet a girl on friday, and she comes out with us on saturday and i can f-close then.

 

[n00bPimp]

In my case, I get a lot of flakes because I usually go for girls that are out my league. When I'm out sarging my mindset is: Does she intimidate me? if the answer is yes then I drag my self and open her. If the answer is no I leave her alone.
When I used to go for girls that were at my level I barely got flakes.

 

[PokerStar]

In my case, I get a lot of flakes because I usually go for girls that are out my league. When I'm out sarging my mindset is: Does she intimidate me? if the answer is yes then I drag my self and open her. If the answer is no I leave her alone.
When I used to go for girls that were at my level I barely got flakes.

out of your league? dude you are in the majors. there is no higher league to the one you are playing right now.

 

[PDubb75]

I asked myself this same question recently. I then changed my thinking to "maybe I'm just not approaching as much as I should".

However, so much of my time has been taken up by girls I've met through my social circle recently. I wouldn't have time to add in anyone else. At least not if I continue with other hobbies (gym, sports, etc). The problem here is, my social circle is gonna dry up eventually. It can't keep bringing me good catches forever.

But to go on to your question, I think a lot of guys try for the number MUCH quicker than you seem to. So many guys (and I'm not saying it's a bad thing) will make their approach and try for the number within a couple minutes. This, of course, is going to yield fewer positive results, but also allow for more chances. You may end up getting the same amount of dates, in the same time invested, but your percentage will be higher.

 

[Alex DeLarge]

Only times I've ever been flaked on are for stupid things that were completely my fault, or things completely out of my control Such as..

1. Being too needy (AFC days) - This was right around when I first found this site. Met a girl at a bar, then two days later I'm in her bedroom getting freaky. We had about two dates then she just stopped talking to me out of nowhere. I got kind of drunk one night and called her up saying something like "I'm not the kind of person you just lead on blah blah" She said she was freaked out.. Called back 10 minutes later apologizing pathetically. She hits me up time to time when she's drunk still lol.

2. Being too much of a ****y assh0le - Met another girl right after previously mentioned one. Like it says I was too much of a ****. It can be funny time to time but when you act that way all the time the girl just gets sick of you.

3. Getting a friend's number - Met a girl at a club and she gave me her number.. She was definitely down to fvck that night too. She had a hotter friend and I started flirting with her and got her number. I saw the other girl crying with her guy friend and they all left. I just felt like a **** and went home early that night. Didn't bother contacting her friend.

4. She had a boyfriend - I was out of state for a day to see some friends.. We wound up roaming around his neighborhood and found a college party. I met this really cute girl there and we talked for a bit. She gave me some really heavy eye contact smiling and all that. We went for a walk and she dropped the boyfriend card on me. I could tell she was super attracted to me so I said to her "Well let me get your number anyways, you seem like a really cool person and I'd like to get to know you".. She gave me her number and I texted her about 2 days later. No reply, I figured she gave me a fake number. I wasn't bummed and figured that was great of her to stay loyal to her boyfriend. About 2 months later I got a text from the number and we had a long conversation. She had broken up with her BF lol.. Never talked to her after that cause I figured it wasn't worth it.

 

[garruk]

If you're not getting flaked, I sincerely doubt that that interacting with the number of women you claim. Women flake; men do, too.

Women get bored with men.

Men get bored with women.

You mean to tell me that you're sincerely interested in nearly 100% of the women's phone numbers you collect?

If so, I'm not impressed because you're not very picky.

And, in my opinion, "3-4 numbers a month" is actually a lot of numbers; certainly a LOT higher than the average guy.You're collecting as many as 52 phone numbers a year, which, according to you, means that you're dating 52 women a year.

And you've plyed all of 'em. Haven't settled with a single one of 'em.

You sure about those numbers?

i think 3-4 refers to me being single. i got 3 numbers so far this month, all with resulting dates, 1 with resulting f close, 1 with kiss close, and i see the third girl this weekend.

i got another 3 numbers last month (july) all with resulting dates and 1 with resulting f closes. the one that got away moved to grad school in a different part of the state. kiss closed all 3.


prior to that i was in a relatively monogomous relationship from march to the beginning of july and when i went out, she was almost always with me. but before that i was averaging the same numbers.

so yeah, im definetly not meeting and screwing 52 girls a year but i dont think that feat would be impossible either.

 

[garruk]

out of your league? dude you are in the majors. there is no higher league to the one you are playing right now.

to be honest i disagree with this. to an extent, yes they are all in your league but that doesnt mean the cleveland cavaliers are going to beat the lakers in the championship.


to pdubb, i think the best way to handle girls out of your league is not to approach them but work on yourself so that 2 years down the line, those girls are in your league.

 

[PokerStar]

to be honest i disagree with this. to an extent, yes they are all in your league but that doesnt mean the cleveland cavaliers are going to beat the lakers in the championship.


to

i see what you are saying. but it still means that the cavaliers can make a game, no not game. they can make a series go 7 games.

and maybe adding a few key players(tools) to your arsenal can make you that much better.

 

[garruk]

^^ yeah, i mean the cavaliers can still win, just like pdubb can still get a number and if hes lucky maybe he can get himself an f close. but in terms of securing an ltr... pretty unlikely.

you are right in the sense that you probably shouldnt tell yourself that they are out of your league though. thats a self defeating attitude and you probably lost before you started.

 

[PokerStar]

you are right in the sense that you probably shouldnt tell yourself that they are out of your league though. thats a self defeating attitude and you probably lost before you started.

Thats what im talking about.

Always think positive!!

 

[garruk]

^ lol thats not my point. im saying that EVERYONE here can be flakeproof too.

im not doing anything that you guys wouldnt be able to do either. im sure if i just went to the mall, talked to a girl for 10 minutes and then asked for a number, she would probably flake on me too.

edit: I was responding to espi

 

[PDubb75]

to pdubb, i think the best way to handle girls out of your league is not to approach them but work on yourself so that 2 years down the line, those girls are in your league.

just like pdubb can still get a number and if hes lucky maybe he can get himself an f close. but in terms of securing an ltr... pretty unlikely.

garruk, I don't see where this came from. I didn't say anything that has anything to do with this...

But, in response to it, I disagree. I've dated 2 girls that would probably be considered "out of my league" and I ended both relationships. Would have never happened if I didn't approach (well, at least 1 of them). Same thing with my newest plate. She's for sure "out of my league" but I approached her and found out she had a thing for me, too. You never know what girls want. No reason to stop approaching them while you work on yourself.

But again, not sure why I was brought into this...

 

[r0cky]

to be honest i disagree with this. to an extent, yes they are all in your league but that doesnt mean the cleveland cavaliers are going to beat the lakers in the championship.


to pdubb, i think the best way to handle girls out of your league is not to approach them but work on yourself so that 2 years down the line, those girls are in your league.

You must face your limitations if you want to improve. A girl that you consider out of your league means that you have limiting beliefs that impede you from being confident around those type of girls. The only way to get rid of that is by getting shot down time after time by them until you dont give a **** and can be confident around them. This is how you work on yourself, not by approaching lesser women.

 

[SamTheHobit]

garruk, I don't see where this came from. I didn't say anything that has anything to do with this...

But, in response to it, I disagree. I've dated 2 girls that would probably be considered "out of my league" and I ended both relationships. Would have never happened if I didn't approach (well, at least 1 of them). Same thing with my newest plate. She's for sure "out of my league" but I approached her and found out she had a thing for me, too. You never know what girls want. No reason to stop approaching them while you work on yourself.

But again, not sure why I was brought into this...

Exellent point. After all isnt it just a numbers game? I mean aproaching 3 chicks, your odds are dramatically decreased instead of aproaching 20.

 

[Deicide]

^ lol thats not my point. im saying that EVERYONE here can be flakeproof too.

im not doing anything that you guys wouldnt be able to do either. im sure if i just went to the mall, talked to a girl for 10 minutes and then asked for a number, she would probably flake on me too.

edit: I was responding to espi

Cool, what do you recommend for someone like me that does Day Game almost exclusively? My flakes just consisted of girls not answering texts from me. I occasionally get flaked on for dates. I do indirect game typically, and most of the women end up walking away from me when I approach them in stores after a certain time(30 seconds or so). Maybe it's me, or maybe it's the logistics of being in a small town where most people are in relationships? Either way, I continue to approach, though I may need to change my strategy.

 

[garruk]

garruk, I don't see where this came from. I didn't say anything that has anything to do with this...

But, in response to it, I disagree. I've dated 2 girls that would probably be considered "out of my league" and I ended both relationships. Would have never happened if I didn't approach (well, at least 1 of them). Same thing with my newest plate. She's for sure "out of my league" but I approached her and found out she had a thing for me, too. You never know what girls want. No reason to stop approaching them while you work on yourself.

But again, not sure why I was brought into this...

haha whoops I meant to respond to noob but when I glanced up to read the username I must have looked at yours instead. sorry for the confusion haha.

 

[garruk]

Cool, what do you recommend for someone like me that does Day Game almost exclusively? My flakes just consisted of girls not answering texts from me. I occasionally get flaked on for dates. I do indirect game typically, and most of the women end up walking away from me when I approach them in stores after a certain time(30 seconds or so). Maybe it's me, or maybe it's the logistics of being in a small town where most people are in relationships? Either way, I continue to approach, though I may need to change my strategy.

to be honest I'm not sure how the small town thing plays out because I live in the middle of West Hollywood. I think the biggest cause of flaking is just a lack of an emotional investment so to say. basically for me, my first encounter is generally almost a pseudo-first date.

a good friend of mine is a ski instructor up in tahoe and he nails more girls than anyone I know. while that's partly becuase the girls he meets are all on vacation, I think a good part of it just has to do with the ski/snowboard lesson serving as an almost pseudo-first date. then it's a breeze for him to get the number and arrange to meet at night or for the next day.