Ok here we go again... The cousin that I broke off as much contact as possible with is being relentless. This one, of course, for those know my history.
So whenever I see her at family get-togethers or parties, she shows up, full make-up and everything, without her boyfriend. I say Hi to her, sometimes make trivial small talk ("Hey, how's life?", "Any plans now that you've graduated high school?", etc.). I try to keep it as down low as possible. I limit the interaction to the bare essentials, then eject. Nothing wrong with that.
But every time we hang out, and other people are around, she brings up past topics that she KNOWS will affect me. She knows I have tried to chase her friends, but, being an AFC drunk f***-up, I obviously f***** them up. For example, one time, while I was with her and my other cousin, she constantly talked about her friend, who I had a crush on, and all the dates she's gotten from different guys, and how that girl's having trouble weeding out who's good from not. This girl had removed me from facebook before, and completely rejected me. Other times, she will find ways to bring up her other friend, who I had extremely strong feelings for but had to cut off because of low interest, and pop that girl's name into conversation whenever possible, even if it's not really relevant to what she's talking about. She'll make fun of the people who my other cousin (her brother) and I hang out with if we mention them.
I'm sick of this sh**. Many of you guys told me that I've shown interest too strong for her, which pushed her away, but the vibe and tension I feel everytime I'm around her reeks of "vengeance" in a way. She still wants me. I am quite certain of this. Trust me. But I've moved on.
I just want things to be the old way, say like a year ago. We were really good friends, connected really well, and I valued her as a sister, especially since I've been an only child my whole life. That was until she touched my d*** and started showing sexual interest in me. Being the AFC I was, I couldn't resist flirting with her. Hell, I even fell in love with her maybe. But for my, her, and society's sake, I stopped that sh** before it hit the fan. I went almost no contact, and found other girls to talk to. I did the right thing.
But it affects her. She'll find any opportunity to put me down, keep me at her level, etc., whenever she gets the chance to see me. After reading this extremely insightful thread, I realized EXACTLY why she was acting the way she was. She has a boyfriend whom she's unsatisfied with and is subsequently "jealous" that I won't show interest in her. She doesn't want to find me one day with a hot girlfriend. She wants me to be single and miserable.
I was thinking of bringing her aside the next time I see her, and ask her "Yo, what's up? Why don't we really talk to each other anymore? Have I upset you? I'm your cousin. Let's be honest." Anything to give her unofficial closure and make her stop acting like a resentful b*tch would be good...
Thoughts?
So whenever I see her at family get-togethers or parties, she shows up, full make-up and everything, without her boyfriend. I say Hi to her, sometimes make trivial small talk ("Hey, how's life?", "Any plans now that you've graduated high school?", etc.). I try to keep it as down low as possible. I limit the interaction to the bare essentials, then eject. Nothing wrong with that.
But every time we hang out, and other people are around, she brings up past topics that she KNOWS will affect me. She knows I have tried to chase her friends, but, being an AFC drunk f***-up, I obviously f***** them up. For example, one time, while I was with her and my other cousin, she constantly talked about her friend, who I had a crush on, and all the dates she's gotten from different guys, and how that girl's having trouble weeding out who's good from not. This girl had removed me from facebook before, and completely rejected me. Other times, she will find ways to bring up her other friend, who I had extremely strong feelings for but had to cut off because of low interest, and pop that girl's name into conversation whenever possible, even if it's not really relevant to what she's talking about. She'll make fun of the people who my other cousin (her brother) and I hang out with if we mention them.
I'm sick of this sh**. Many of you guys told me that I've shown interest too strong for her, which pushed her away, but the vibe and tension I feel everytime I'm around her reeks of "vengeance" in a way. She still wants me. I am quite certain of this. Trust me. But I've moved on.
I just want things to be the old way, say like a year ago. We were really good friends, connected really well, and I valued her as a sister, especially since I've been an only child my whole life. That was until she touched my d*** and started showing sexual interest in me. Being the AFC I was, I couldn't resist flirting with her. Hell, I even fell in love with her maybe. But for my, her, and society's sake, I stopped that sh** before it hit the fan. I went almost no contact, and found other girls to talk to. I did the right thing.
But it affects her. She'll find any opportunity to put me down, keep me at her level, etc., whenever she gets the chance to see me. After reading this extremely insightful thread, I realized EXACTLY why she was acting the way she was. She has a boyfriend whom she's unsatisfied with and is subsequently "jealous" that I won't show interest in her. She doesn't want to find me one day with a hot girlfriend. She wants me to be single and miserable.
I was thinking of bringing her aside the next time I see her, and ask her "Yo, what's up? Why don't we really talk to each other anymore? Have I upset you? I'm your cousin. Let's be honest." Anything to give her unofficial closure and make her stop acting like a resentful b*tch would be good...
Thoughts?
