I did a half assed approach today

[flipflip]

So after walking around the mall for like 30 mins I saw a girl by herself and I complimented her on her hair style. She said "awe thanks" and I said yep no problem and walked away lol. There was another woman I wanted to approach but I bitched out bc she looked a lot older than me (mid 30's) and I'm too much of a ***** to do a direct approach for some reason. I also saw lots of girls with a friend but idk how to approach them.

 

[StacksHitEmUp]

So after walking around the mall for like 30 mins I saw a girl by herself and I complimented her on her hair style. She said "awe thanks" and I said yep no problem and walked away lol. There was another woman I wanted to approach but I bitched out bc she looked a lot older than me (mid 30's) and I'm too much of a ***** to do a direct approach for some reason. I also saw lots of girls with a friend but idk how to approach them.

If you’re shy/nervous you can open with something innocent like asking where something is or where to get something and then proceed from there based on her reaction.

 

[flipflip]

If you’re shy/nervous you can open with something innocent like asking where something is or where to get something and then proceed from there based on her reaction.

I really want to be able to walk up to a girl and tell her she's pretty. I watch videos online and it seems so easy but it's so much harder when I'm outside and actually have to do it lol

 

[StacksHitEmUp]

I really want to be able to walk up to a girl and tell her she's pretty. I watch videos online and it seems so easy but it's so much harder when I'm outside and actually have to do it lol

You shouldn’t tell them they’re pretty. Unless she’s an absolute monster she probably hears this all the time. Make yourself stand apart, just straight up strike up a small conversation and end with asking number. If you feel ballsy you can just walk up to her, introduce yourself and ask her for her number. It’ll feel scary at first and you’ll be terrified but afterwards you’ll feel great for having the balls to do this. Don’t let fear guide you, fear is the worst advisor you can listen to.

 

[flipflip]

You shouldn’t tell them they’re pretty. Unless she’s an absolute monster she probably hears this all the time. Make yourself stand apart, just straight up strike up a small conversation and end with asking number. If you feel ballsy you can just walk up to her, introduce yourself and ask her for her number. It’ll feel scary at first and you’ll be terrified but afterwards you’ll feel great for having the balls to do this. Don’t let fear guide you, fear is the worst advisor you can listen to.

I've only done a few approaches in my life but usually I just compliment them on their hair or clothes or something like that. My idea for telling them they're pretty is just a back up plan incase I can't think of anything on the spot.

 

[Charm2K]

So after walking around the mall for like 30 mins I saw a girl by herself and I complimented her on her hair style. She said "awe thanks" and I said yep no problem and walked away lol. There was another woman I wanted to approach but I bitched out bc she looked a lot older than me (mid 30's) and I'm too much of a ***** to do a direct approach for some reason. I also saw lots of girls with a friend but idk how to approach them.

Every cold approach is worth 100 times more than using an app. Keep going.

 

[flipflip]

Every cold approach is worth 100 times more than using an app. Keep going.

Thanks, I plan on it! It's so much harder than it looks though lol

 

[9-3enthusiast]

I've only done a few approaches in my life but usually I just compliment them on their hair or clothes or something like that.

That's a smashing blouse you're wearing... Tell me, do you use Timotei..?

Sorry - Couldn't resist....

 

[2Rocky]

Making conversation with strangers is pretty intimidating until you do it a few times. It's always easiest when you catch their eye and then just introduce yourself.

"Hi there I'm Rocky..."
And then I usually make some sort of reference to the reason we both are there. You know she has to be wondering "Why is this guy talking to me?"

Grocery store "Do you think these avocados are ripe?"
Mall. "Killing time before a lunch meeting"
Airport Headed to x city....got a work meeting/conference/seminar/speaking engagement there. Or Headed to some adventurous vacationa at the mountains/lake/river etc....

 

[flipflip]

Those hit and runs. Thats good. You do 2-3 of those and you will get in a groove. Good job for taking innitiative

Thanks I actually kinda felt like **** because I expected to do more but maybe I'm just being too hard on myself

 

[9-3enthusiast]

Thanks I actually kinda felt like **** because I expected to do more but maybe I'm just being too hard on myself

Yeah... Don't beat yourself up about not being successful straight off the mark, with very little experience behind you.
Try to get into the habit of randomly speaking to people around you - anyone - men and women... all ages... the women you like, AND the women you're not interested in.
I do it all the time, and when you're used to doing it, it makes things much easier (less intimidating) when you're talking to a woman you are interested in.

If I see a woman I like the look of, I look for eye contact, and if I get it I'll say something casual about whatever's happening around.
As Rocky said - The produce in a store/etc...
I've actually picked up a woman in a store - she was looking at guitar strings with a note in her hand, seemed puzzled - I helped, and after a little back-and-forth conversation, arranged a coffee date - Back at my place on the 2nd date and we were together casually for a few months.

You don't have to be startlingly witty - just open up with something casual - if at any point she seems uninterested just go about your business, no harm done - If she does seem interested, keep it going a while. Keep it short, then try for her number, or at your age maybe link up on social media... Occasionally you might even be able to arrange a meet-up there and then.

If you're nervous, it's all about volume, and desensitisation - The more new people you speak to, the easier it'll get.

 

[Striker_93]

Who cares, good job for trying.
I'm 28 years old and if there's one thing I learned in life is to stop taking yourself so damn serious, give yourself a pat on the back, chill, try again next time, learn to laugh at yourself.

Approaching gets easier and easier