I have developed a really strong presence in almost all situations; I'm quiet but I faked confidence for the past two years and after a year it led to serious physical and mental self-improvement which led to real confidence. Anyway my confidence is building but there is still something missing.
I made plans with a girl from class, she was always smiling and looking at me so I approached her and invited her to join me to a performance at a local park. I didn't get her number (saw no point) and told her to meet me at location X, after our classes. My rationale was if she was going to flake she would have to stand me up since she couldn't contact me so I thought this was a way of flake-proofing her since I have learned some girls will flake.
Of course on the day-of this girl tells me she has to go do something after class and that I should call her when I want to meet. At this point I am not feeling hanging out with her anyway so I agree to do this. Now before this I was pretty sure she was into me, so I almost feel like this is a way of her testing my ability to control a situation, to see if I add up (I have given this girl a lot of commands previously). As she gave me her number I realized this was her flaking. However she seemed really interested in me and the plans, and she is quite beautiful, so is crap like this some sort of test? Like am I giving off a vibe that says I may not be the real deal?
My original plan was to call her and say I couldn't make it, but as soon as I called she got apologetic and gave me an excuse to which I simply said "ok." She then apologized some more, and I said "you should give me a better time" to which she told me she could do lunch this week but otherwise wasn't free until next week. I don't know my schedule so I just told her we'll figure it out the next class day.
So fast forward to next class day. I'm outside the classroom and she comes to talk to me. We talk about some random crap, I am exhausted, and she casually mentions a boyfriend for the first time in passing conversation. I ignored it and continued the conversation. My gut told me to try and catch her after class and try to ask her out again, but I was so tired I just went home since I didn't think I could actually handle a conversation at that point.
Part of me feels like these are tests, part of me feels like she is just uninterested. I have some serious social ineptitude so I would appreciate feedback.
What leads to women actually testing you? I could be reading too much into this, like if I give off a signal that I may be faking something or not as be dominate as I appear to be will that instigate things or kill her attraction? How does one really become more grounded and more masculine?
I made plans with a girl from class, she was always smiling and looking at me so I approached her and invited her to join me to a performance at a local park. I didn't get her number (saw no point) and told her to meet me at location X, after our classes. My rationale was if she was going to flake she would have to stand me up since she couldn't contact me so I thought this was a way of flake-proofing her since I have learned some girls will flake.
Of course on the day-of this girl tells me she has to go do something after class and that I should call her when I want to meet. At this point I am not feeling hanging out with her anyway so I agree to do this. Now before this I was pretty sure she was into me, so I almost feel like this is a way of her testing my ability to control a situation, to see if I add up (I have given this girl a lot of commands previously). As she gave me her number I realized this was her flaking. However she seemed really interested in me and the plans, and she is quite beautiful, so is crap like this some sort of test? Like am I giving off a vibe that says I may not be the real deal?
My original plan was to call her and say I couldn't make it, but as soon as I called she got apologetic and gave me an excuse to which I simply said "ok." She then apologized some more, and I said "you should give me a better time" to which she told me she could do lunch this week but otherwise wasn't free until next week. I don't know my schedule so I just told her we'll figure it out the next class day.
So fast forward to next class day. I'm outside the classroom and she comes to talk to me. We talk about some random crap, I am exhausted, and she casually mentions a boyfriend for the first time in passing conversation. I ignored it and continued the conversation. My gut told me to try and catch her after class and try to ask her out again, but I was so tired I just went home since I didn't think I could actually handle a conversation at that point.
Part of me feels like these are tests, part of me feels like she is just uninterested. I have some serious social ineptitude so I would appreciate feedback.
What leads to women actually testing you? I could be reading too much into this, like if I give off a signal that I may be faking something or not as be dominate as I appear to be will that instigate things or kill her attraction? How does one really become more grounded and more masculine?
on't fall into this one. When she says give her a call when you want to meet up, don't do that. Give her the time/location right then, on the spot. Make them decide right then, otherwise you could go to all the trouble of turning up and in the meantime something else might 'just come up' for her.
