I’m watching marriages blow up left and right. It’s depressing.

[logicallefty]

Are the vows just empty from the beginning? Sorry it’s late and my mind is drifting.

I won't go into details as I have posted about this before, but I think I got the top story on empty wedding vows. I married a woman who I later found out was a bigamist, already married to TWO other dudes in TWO other States. So in 2012 under Illinois law where I am I had our marriage annulled instead of divorced, retro active our wedding day in 2009. So we were presumed as married for just over 3 years, but in the end we never were. I think she knew our marriage was invalid but figured I would never find out.

Had I KNOWN our marriage was null/void/fraud, I would not have stuck it out with her as long as I did. My respect for the vows I said were the only thing that kept me with her. Otherwise I would have ended it long before I did.

Moral of the story? Marriage vows not only don't mean anything anymore, but they may not even be valid to begin with..

My thought now.. FVCK MARRIAGE AND THE HORSE IT RODE IN ON..

 

[Trump]

Great post. No problem man. I have had a girlfriend for nearly 10 months now, so I don't do much ruminating like I did a year ago. Every once in awhile those feelings appear and I process them and move forward. I will not see my ex-wife again, unless it's through facebook, as I we live over 2 hours apart now. She'll most likely get divorced again anyways. She's that bad.

My new girlfriend wants to get married. But 10-12 months is way too quick of an engagement so I'm giving it a few years to really make sure we are right for each other. I see no hurry in this at all, in fact, I want to extend what we have now (trips, hot sex, late nights, etc) for as long as I can because it's very happy period for us. Thanks.

Bro sounds like you are still in love with the ex...

Hate to say but it sounds like your new girlfriend just wants to get married so she can tell her girlfriends and society she has value. Marriage is rarely above love nowadays, it's about how society sees you. If the love, trust, and feeling is there, what's a piece of paper going to do?

Everything is charade, corrupt and fake. It's all about emotion and feeling now.

 

[expos]

Bro sounds like you are still in love with the ex...

Hate to say but it sounds like your new girlfriend just wants to get married so she can tell her girlfriends and society she has value. Marriage is rarely above love nowadays, it's about how society sees you. If the love, trust, and feeling is there, what's a piece of paper going to do?

Everything is charade, corrupt and fake. It's all about emotion and feeling now.

Not in love with her - but definitely hurt by her. I was in love with her after the divorce but those feelings are gone. She is not capable of love and I needed to realize that. She just wanted to get married and took the guy with the highest value to her which was me at the time. Then she quit on the marriage about 6 months into it. She's even worse now. She's fat, she's marrying a co-worker, and they all live with his mom. SMH.

I've dated and banged a few girls after her anyways. SHE'S GONE!!! lol.

My new girl is a massive improvement over the wife. Much smarter and respectful, devoted to me, attractive (Bradd80 has seen her), and has her own place. We rarely fight, and there are no sh!t tests. I just know better this time and to not commit to marriage so quickly. I bought the married man sex primer book and No More Mr. Nice Guy, I post here, and I'm doing everything in my power to drive this relationship the right way. If it doesn't work out, then at least I can say I was PREPARED this time around.

Marriage not be the future for me, but the work I've done since the divorce and during this relationship has really got me to a good place regardless.

 

[abe0]

I am a little older but I was happily married for 25 years and together for 31 years till my wife had a mental breakdown and diagnosed with severe bipolar of which she tried to kill herself 4 times. Unfortunately, she fried her brains and became a different person refusing to take medications. If not for that....I still be a happily married man.
Happy good marriages are still out there....but there are fewer and fewer. I do not think I will ever get married again because it is so difficult to find that right person....besides I am having fun with a lot different women at this time.
BTW...the stats are even worse than you think. In the olden days every one got married and with a fewer divorce rate. Now ...fewer and fewer people get married so now you are talking 40% staying married of a much smaller pool.....That means a very large group either are divorced or never get married to begin with.
Consider yourself a lucky man if you find that right person....a good woman... and you can make it work. When it works...it is a wonderful experience. When it doesn't....it can be HELL ON EARTH! Abe

 

[PeasantPlayer]

That's the stupidest thing I ever read. All laws and rules are a social construct. Should we do away criminalizing theft, murder, pedophilia, rape etc? Everything but anarchy is a social contruct. Feminism and a cad society is a social contruct. What social contructs benefit you as a man?

Your reply is retarded? proof read next time. You are posting from a place of your beliefs and opinions not facts. No the law for murder should not be removed.....not everything humans made up is a good thing. Some are......jesus

 

[PeasantPlayer]

What is the point of marriage? What purpose does it serve for the 2 people?

 

[Stagger Lee]

Your reply is retarded? proof read next time. You are posting from a place of your beliefs and opinions not facts. No the law for murder should not be removed.....not everything humans made up is a good thing. Some are......jesus

But it is just your beliefs and opinions not facts of which things "humans made up" are good and which are bad. Most of the evidence points that most social and law changes since the 50's and certainly the 70's and on were not good.

The problem with marriage isn't marriage per se. It's feminism corruption of not just of marriage but many things in society-dating market, family, child custody etc.

What is the point of marriage? What purpose does it serve for the 2 people?

See your ignorance? Not much now but before feminism, marriage served many purposes. Basically for most every man the ownership of a woman worth being married to who was a caregiver to the entire family. The best enviroment generally for your children (back when having kids was a possibility without being ruined by anti-male/father laws). For the woman safety, security and provisioning (now the state provides that with welfare, child support, alimony, affirmative action/EEO etc), being seen as a respectable woman in society.

I think it's valid for someone to say, they would never want to be married or have children under any circumstance. There's always been men who chose to be bachelors. But to castigate the concept of marriage and having a family, and claim you didn't want that anyway when the real reason is because of feminism, is misplaced.

In a nut shell, marriage served the purpose of eliminating a lot of social problems prevelant in the recent past and getting worse today.

 

[Stagger Lee]

But but but......where are all of the good men???


LOL, agree with pretty much everything in this thread so far.


Women demand the right to chase careers, let them have careers.
Women demand the right to fvk like men, let them be treated as men.
Women demand the right to say no to sex with their husband, let them say no.


Men can say no too. That is the fly in the ointment.

Women wanted a hookup culture, to be free to sleep with who they wish and in whatever numbers they wish, give them exactly what they asked for......let them realize on their own it wasn't what they wanted.

I hear you. Although playing it by women's rules everyone loses, but most all men still lose more. It's still women having what they (think) they want. It's playing by females rules, which they can and do change all the time. It's still not what a man generally wants. It may be the only practical solution men have, but certainly not idea or the best.

 

[sylvester the cat]

What really is unsettling is going back and looking at some their wedding photos on Facebook and seeing how incredibly big and wonderful these events were and how happy everyone looked.

i half suspect the reason people get married these days is just so they can post it on facebook and show everyone how happy and 'normal' they are.

then come the obligatory baby pics.

i guess divorce is the only thing left after that to post on facebook to fulfill their need for drama.

 

[abe0]

What is the point of marriage? What purpose does it serve for the 2 people?

True companionship where you consider your spouse..."this is my best friend". It may be cliché....but we completed each other....we were one. Enjoyment in life where the first thing you think about when you are doing something you like...that the enjoyment would be so much more if you had your partner with you. Protection of your family and children. Having a sense that there is more to life than just yourself alone...it is of giving of yourself to another in a way you never have before and an understanding and faith that that person will always have your best interest and that your back will always be covered. It is the feeling you get that without that person something in life is missing.
I do not know what other ways I can convey the point of marriage....but I had that once and it is a very powerful thing to have in your life. That it is why it is so devastating to go through a divorce because it is as if a part of you dies along with it.
Is it worth the risk? It was for me......and I still would be happily married if it were not for my wife's mental illness.
Best, Abe

 

[jurry]

What is women "abiding by the social contract"?

 

[JoeMarron]

I'm married. I decided to go ahead and give it a try while I'm young instead of waiting until I'm 30 and jaded. I've done the work. I screened for a woman who comes from a good home with good morals, isn't crazy, isn't a raging wh0re, isn't gonna piss me off in a few years, etc. and I believe that my wife fits those parameters. I have a fail safe in place just in case I'm wrong, she makes more money than me and we don't plan on having kids for quite some time. If she pulls any bullsh!t I can pull the plug without screwing myself over. However, of course that'll change when we get more established and start having children. Monogamy gets one chance from me. If this fails then women may just be relegated to sex toys in my mind. There's just too many emotions and investment involved to go through one failed relationship after another.

 

[Mr Wright]

If you look at average guys who haven't found game, most of them fall into relationships to have sex...and then get duped into getting married because they have no other options. I can see my friends my own age going the same way, I'm trying to get them to realise what's really going on but it's up to them. I'll still turn up to their special day, drink their booze and hit on their new sister in law. At the end of the day, marriage was always a way of keeping each other in check and because of the freedom that we all have today, it's gone to shït.

I'm married. I decided to go ahead and give it a try while I'm young instead of waiting until I'm 30 and jaded. I've done the work. I screened for a woman who comes from a good home with good morals, isn't crazy, isn't a raging wh0re, isn't gonna piss me off in a few years, etc. and I believe that my wife fits those parameters.

Out of interest, why did you choose marriage rather than a long term relationship? I guess you're lucky that you have little to lose if does go downhill but what else was it?

 

[zekko]

If you look at average guys who haven't found game, most of them fall into relationships to have sex...and then get duped into getting married because they have no other options.

Yeah, the problem with marriage is that there is no risk for the woman - unless she is a rich heiress or something. She basically wants a guy to give her children and pay for the children. She doesn't need to stay married to the guy to get that. In fact, if she can repeat the process with a few different guys, that gives her multiple streams of income. Meanwhile, the guy has to limp on through the rest of his life financially crippled.

In marriage, the man assumes all the risk, and frankly there is very little incentive for the woman to live up to her end of the bargain.

 

[In2theGame]

This thread is depressing but not because of the "negative" vibe about marriage but because i feel like this too and see a growing number of Men opting out of ever wanting to get married and/or get married again. I then think why is this?... I think about all the horrible stories of Girlfriends/Fiances/Wives cheating or being manipulative as well as the court system in high favor of women. I myself, as i have posted before, have a deep emotional/mental scar from what my ex girlfriend did at the end of our 5 year LTR and i can no longer trust a Woman. Even the thought of developing "Love" feelings for another Woman gives me anxiety and i never want to go through what i went through again. I have no idea how in the world a Man makes it through a divorce in which his Wife takes his Money, Children, House etc away from him. That must be the most heart wrenching thing and me personally would want to go strangle her.

Like I have mentioned before, i was almost Married twice. First serious girlfriend i did everything for her and she took me for granted, plus cheated on me twice until i couldnt take the emotional stress anymore. Second serious girlfriend, i was scared of getting hurt again and i wanted to make sure this one was for me, for 5 years she was a great girlfriend and i was set on making her my wife. Soon after i discovered she was cheating on me and left me to get engaged to another Man 2 months out of the breakup. I wasnt the perfect boyfriend but i truly loved her even though she got somewhat fat and a bit saggy, I really didnt care because she was still beautiful to me and was like my best friend. The ironic thing is she called me a fat-azz while she was packing her panties to wear for someone else along with a lot more hurtful things she did and said. I have to be thankful to God i didnt have to go through a Divorce but either way, it hurt really bad. It's been 3 years since the breakup and i STILL have anxiety/flashbacks that i still deal with that makes me have a massive shield up against ALL women getting close to me.

I have absolutely no problems getting Hot women but as far as letting anything develop, i fight it to avoid getting hurt and that makes me feel as if i will avoid Marriage. Its funny how these women think now a days, Its almost unbelievable. I wish i could show you guys the texts but the other day my closest female friend texts me to catch up and say hey, We get into this convo about me having loads of dates and hooking up with multiple women. She tells me when i will find that Special girl. I said i dont trust women. She goes on a rant about how all women are not like that and that many women out there are great. Whats the catch? This advice is coming from someone who is Married and has cheated on her husband with a coworker behind his back. When i put her on the spot about it, she says "We're not talking about that right now" lol incredible. Anyway... I would like to get married to a beautiful women i could truly love again openly and start a family but Women today are just too whacked out of their minds and too emotionally messed up from all the feminism garbage. Like i have said over and over again... Man was made to lead Woman and be submissive to their Husbands but feminism teaches "I dont need a man and i can do whatever i want".

 

[Zarky]

What I don't understand is the hand-wringing about it by men. I'm absolutely thrilled that marriage sucks and is to be avoided. I never wanted to get married anyway, even if it were fully biased toward men. I can't imagine what guy would want to vow to only bang one woman for the next several decades.

So, to me, this is a great time for men. Women are sluttier, most (or at least many) of them pay 50%, etc. It's far easier for the average shmuck like me to have MLTRs than, say, it was in 1955.

IMHO men should be rejoicing. Marriage is, and always has been, for women. The fact that it is crumbling is the best thing to happen to men.

 

[jurry]

Not really understanding the argument there danger.. Many women can and do still act as housewives who nurture the family and do not work. Also, more women now work and you have families with two working parents, many of which where the woman may make more than the man. If she is making more than it would be reflected in the divorce settlements, same as if he was making more.

The sexual component of it is not new, women could always withhold sex (and generally dominate) her husband in many ways. If you get married to a conniving manipulative slut, whose fault is that? Dont do it in the first place.

I like the old random dig at socialism though, you might notice some of the most "socialist" countries (highest equality, strongest welfare systems) are some of the richest countries on earth (scandinavian countries for example).

In short, you all sound like a bunch of butthurt whiny pvssies complaining about getting dominated by women. If you dont trust this woman with your life and your love after years of being together and instead just jump into a marriage, you got no one to blame but yourself. There are many happy long term relationships (married or otherwise) out there.

 

[jurry]

What I don't understand is the hand-wringing about it by men. I'm absolutely thrilled that marriage sucks and is to be avoided. I never wanted to get married anyway, even if it were fully biased toward men. I can't imagine what guy would want to vow to only bang one woman for the next several decades.

So, to me, this is a great time for men. Women are sluttier, most (or at least many) of them pay 50%, etc. It's far easier for the average shmuck like me to have MLTRs than, say, it was in 1955.

IMHO men should be rejoicing. Marriage is, and always has been, for women. The fact that it is crumbling is the best thing to happen to men.

Right on!

 

[Trump]

Not really understanding the argument there danger.. Many women can and do still act as housewives who nurture the family and do not work. Also, more women now work and you have families with two working parents, many of which where the woman may make more than the man. If she is making more than it would be reflected in the divorce settlements, same as if he was making more.

The sexual component of it is not new, women could always withhold sex (and generally dominate) her husband in many ways. If you get married to a conniving manipulative slut, whose fault is that? Dont do it in the first place.

In short, you all sound like a bunch of butthurt whiny pvssies complaining about getting dominated by women. If you dont trust this woman with your life and your love after years of being together and instead just jump into a marriage, you got no one to blame but yourself. There are many happy long term relationships (married or otherwise) out there.

We are not complaining, we are telling it like it is.

Of course the man is dominated, we are living in a society where the feminist agenda rules all. We have to cater, protect, pay for, and serve woman at all times because it a free country. What man can fight a woman who has the court and state on her side? Even if she makes more money, the women can fabricate a story like abuse and it will ultimately be believed because she is the weaker sex and our job is to believe them, whether it's true or not, whether it benefits society or not.

If you don't think a woman can change their mind on dimes notice depending and how she feels, you are naive. Woman are in it for money and kids, they don't and won't care about the man if they don't need to.

 

[jurry]

Woman are in it for money and kids, they don't and won't care about the man if they don't need to.

Sorry you feel that way, its a miserable and callous attitude to go through life with.. There are many many great beautiful women out there that will do anything for you in a relationship and be loving and loyal partners. The backlash and hatred towards women that i see in threads like this seems like the collective frustration of men who just havent found one yet.