How to juggle FOMO with Productivity?

[BPH]

Weird question, sure, I don't really know how to word it better.

Basically, I'm in a s***y financial situation so I spend most of my time not working, working. I live in Delaware, am still at home with my parents, don't make much money, and work a job where I don't really have any facetime with people my age.

Aside from the gym, the only places I see or meet women my age is through dating apps and bars.

I would say I'm a very good-looking guy, but I still strike out quite a bit. It's not until now, when it's been a month since I last got laid, that it starts to feel kinda crappy to be on a dry spell. Lately, I've built up a pretty good relationship with most of the staff at this local college bar to the point where most nights the only things I pay for are parking and Ubers if I've had too much to drive. Unfortunately with me being 28 and most of these girls being 21-22 I've started to have my age be the dealbreaker, but anyway that's beside the point, I just wanted to put together some context for my question here...

So, Thursday, Friday, and sometimes Saturday I'll go out, my drinks will be free, and I'll be around a bunch of cute college girls. If I stay in I DEFINITELY don't meet women and as the weeks go on and on and on it starts to feel lame that I'm not getting laid. BUT, if I stay in I get to spend time working and building toward improving my situation where I can move out and be around hotter women at nicer bars with a place to myself and won't be the "old guy" at a college bar.

I don't really know what I'm expecting from this post, but I'm wondering what some of you guys would suggest as far as balancing these two parts of my life.

 

[Velasco]

I live in Delaware, am still at home with my parents, don't make much money, and work a job where I don't really have any facetime with people my age.

Was in a similar situation. Have you thought about going back to school and starting over? This time prioritizing a career where there will be a lot of facetime with girls around your age

 

[BPH]

Was in a similar situation. Have you thought about going back to school and starting over? This time prioritizing a career where there will be a lot of facetime with girls around your age

More student loan debt doesn't really appeal to me.

 

[Velasco]

More student loan debt doesn't really appeal to me.

K. keep on keeping on then

 

[Murk]

The question is, are you ACTUALLY improving your situation financially by staying home Thursday, Friday, and Saturday night?

There's nothing you can't do Monday to Friday and still go out Friday night and Saturday. If you're not spending money and it's just time, you can always find the time, we have lot's of it if used wisely.

I used to lie to myself too. I work 16 hour days sometimes, It's 7:50am on Sunday, I've been up since 6am, been for a run and I'm sending work emails and making a plan of action for next week. Then again I'm 33 and I've done all my partying, there's no FOMO here. I will advise you to get right financially ASAP.

How much of a fulfilling relationship, how much fun can you have with a woman while living with your parents and being broke? Not much, I've been there. The real issue here is you are saying going out 1-2 nights a week is impacting your ability to improve, which is a lie you're telling yourself.

There are 168 hours in a week, 56 for sleeping, you expect me to believe you have 112 hours per week to improve your life and a few hours in the evening is impacting that? Dig deeper my friend, be honest and get productive with your time. 28 is still young, but you'll be 30 soon and life gets a bit sticky if you're still a bum at 30+.

 

[Dr.Suave]

How to Beast made a video about this recently. You need a job to get by, sure. At the same time you should take one of those six months courses to become a programmer and I have heard that pays a lot better. You can decide what to do next from there.

 

[BPH]

The question is, are you ACTUALLY improving your situation financially by staying home Thursday, Friday, and Saturday night?

There's nothing you can't do Monday to Friday and still go out Friday night and Saturday. If you're not spending money and it's just time, you can always find the time, we have lot's of it if used wisely.

I used to lie to myself too. I work 16 hour days sometimes, It's 7:50am on Sunday, I've been up since 6am, been for a run and I'm sending work emails and making a plan of action for next week. Then again I'm 33 and I've done all my partying, there's no FOMO here. I will advise you to get right financially ASAP.

How much of a fulfilling relationship, how much fun can you have with a woman while living with your parents and being broke? Not much, I've been there. The real issue here is you are saying going out 1-2 nights a week is impacting your ability to improve, which is a lie you're telling yourself.

There are 168 hours in a week, 56 for sleeping, you expect me to believe you have 112 hours per week to improve your life and a few hours in the evening is impacting that? Dig deeper my friend, be honest and get productive with your time. 28 is still young, but you'll be 30 soon and life gets a bit sticky if you're still a bum at 30+.

Well, I didn't really kick my own a** into high gear until about 3 months ago at the end of July when I came back from vacation and the realization that this mediocre week I spent at the beach was the most fun I'll have until it comes around again...and that pissed me off. So I stopped playing video games entirely and buckled down on learning a skill to try and make myself enough money to escape my low-paying part-time job and move out of my parent's house - and stay out this time.

Originally I dedicated at least 4 hours per day to learning and applying this skill (copywriting), and now I basically invest any free time I have into this when I'm not at work, the gym, or going out. Last night I re-upped my server training so I could try to get a job as a bartender and turn those weekends into income.

But I get your point, the "lying to yourself" thing. The way I see it, most weekdays I get up at 9am and I stay up until 4am. I don't work Fridays so I essentially have a 3-day weekend where those hours don't have to go towards my job and can be spent on what I'm doing to try and escape my situation. The difference it makes with going out is the time I spend getting ready, going out, getting back drunk, and going to bed early/sleeping in late as a result make me think I'm wasting that time.

It probably wouldn't feel AS wasteful if I had some women to show for it, but as I mentioned my dry spell is about to hit the 1-month mark so it's starting to suck a little bit, I want to smash something new so I don't feel bogged down by the thought that I'm having more difficulty than I should with these chicks for another few weeks.

How to Beast made a video about this recently. You need a job to get by, sure. At the same time you should take one of those six months courses to become a programmer and I have heard that pays a lot better. You can decide what to do next from there.

I'm not familiar, if you think it's valuable information to watch do you happen to have a link?

 

[Dr.Suave]

Well, I didn't really kick my own a** into high gear until about 3 months ago at the end of July when I came back from vacation and the realization that this mediocre week I spent at the beach was the most fun I'll have until it comes around again...and that pissed me off. So I stopped playing video games entirely and buckled down on learning a skill to try and make myself enough money to escape my low-paying part-time job and move out of my parent's house - and stay out this time.

Originally I dedicated at least 4 hours per day to learning and applying this skill (copywriting), and now I basically invest any free time I have into this when I'm not at work, the gym, or going out. Last night I re-upped my server training so I could try to get a job as a bartender and turn those weekends into income.

But I get your point, the "lying to yourself" thing. The way I see it, most weekdays I get up at 9am and I stay up until 4am. I don't work Fridays so I essentially have a 3-day weekend where those hours don't have to go towards my job and can be spent on what I'm doing to try and escape my situation. The difference it makes with going out is the time I spend getting ready, going out, getting back drunk, and going to bed early/sleeping in late as a result make me think I'm wasting that time.

It probably wouldn't feel AS wasteful if I had some women to show for it, but as I mentioned my dry spell is about to hit the 1-month mark so it's starting to suck a little bit, I want to smash something new so I don't feel bogged down by the thought that I'm having more difficulty than I should with these chicks for another few weeks.



I'm not familiar, if you think it's valuable information to watch do you happen to have a link?

 

[Murk]

This is exactly why I'm working 16 hour days and weekends, it's all about to come crashing down. This is why I made the recession thread in the other sub forum