How To deal With A Flakey Plate?

[soulforge]

Don't be upset. Just take charge.

"Your change isn't good for me. Next time."

Then leave it for a week and contact her when you would normally see her.

Getting upset is falling into her games and chit testing. If you take charge she will realise she can't chit test you. Right now she is stretching the boundaries too see what she can get away with

I know your saying leave it for a week... but she is messaging me in the mean time...

Her - can i get back massage next weekend? WTF

Her - are you not talking to me?

So i suppose i will have to respond, with simple answers.. i need to stay distant, but not completely distante...


Defo a certain amount of boundaries being tested here...

If i let her flake with no consequences, then just re arrange on her terms, i would be setting myself up for a fuk up

 

[soulforge]

Don't be upset. Just take charge.

"Your change isn't good for me. Next time."

Then leave it for a week and contact her when you would normally see her.

Getting upset is falling into her games and chit testing. If you take charge she will realise she can't chit test you. Right now she is stretching the boundaries too see what she can get away with

Ignoring her completely will make me look butt hurt..

She will see through that... best to keep distance, but not completely

 

[soulforge]

She has you rattled man. Do you really care if another guy is in the picture? If you do then walk.. ignore her for weeks until you truly don't care. If you stay with her.. even if its non-exclusive it sounds like she is going to mess with you emotionally.

ALWAYS LISTEN TO YOUR GUT. Your gut says something is up! PEACE OF MIND IS EVERYTHING.

NEXT HER.

This is true... something isn't right... why would a bich go from i want to fuk you every day of the week, because she has free time, as not at work...

To she will see me at the weekend... defo some suss ****..

To be fair i don't care if there is another dude in pic.. i'm just banging her..

Just don't like my time wasted and flaking thats all

 

[QuadDeuces]

What you do is, you do nothing and go live your life and surround yourself with people who respect you, and don't give attention to people who do not respect you.

 

[soulforge]

What you do is, you do nothing and go live your life and surround yourself with people who respect you, and don't give attention to people who do not respect you.

Wise words man... to be fair she aint always been disrespectful...

But fuking with my precious time, i even double checked with her if we where still on, and she said yes...

Then she flake last minute.. she may have valid reason, but still kinda disrespectful..

And not considered my time... can't let chit like that slide man

 

[finality]

This is true... something isn't right... why would a bich go from i want to fuk you every day of the week, because she has free time, as not at work...

To she will see me at the weekend... defo some suss ****..

To be fair i don't care if there is another dude in pic.. i'm just banging her..

Just don't like my time wasted and flaking thats all

Flaking doesn't matter. That's not what this is about. Its not about respect or frame or any of that other stuff.

This is about your GUT telling your SOMETHING IS WRONG. You need to eject. Especially since you are still jaded from your last break up.

You are in this state because you have received a message and you are not listening to it. If you fight this feeling.. and cave to quick gratification you will regret it.

NEXT HER!

The universe will reward you if you do.

 

[QuadDeuces]

Wise words man... to be fair she aint always been disrespectful...

But fuking with my precious time, i even double checked with her if we where still on, and she said yes...

Then she flake last minute.. she may have valid reason, but still kinda disrespectful..

And not considered my time... can't let chit like that slide man

Judge by actions and not by words.
Women/People are usually non confrontational, meaning they will not tell you to your face that they are losing interest. But their actions will show it to you.
Just let her go and see if she comes to you, if she doesn't it's fine, if she does it's also fine.
Just don't go chase her and ask needy questions because that is gonna spoil it and make her run away that she won't come back.

 

[soulforge]

Judge by actions and not by words.
Women/People are usually non confrontational, meaning they will not tell you to your face that they are losing interest. But their actions will show it to you.
Just let her go and see if she comes to you, if she doesn't it's fine, if she does it's also fine.
Just don't go chase her and ask needy questions because that is gonna spoil it and make her run away that she won't come back.

Well she is still trying to confirm if i will be seeing her this Friday

Maybe she wants to try some new dik out up untill the weekend, and keep me on the hook if it doesn't workout with him.

Your right tho.. I don't think ignoring her completely will achieve anything... pulling back and distancing myself is probably the way forward...

I also get what QUADDUECES is saying.. you never ignore the GUT man... you know deep inside when something does not feel right... or something feels dodgy...

Only been banging her just over 2 months, coming intp 3r month.. so not a huge loss...

Will see how this plays put.. if she stays fair enough, if she walks then fuk her..

This plate I met on PoF and fuked me within two hours on the first date... you know these permiscuues chick, always spell trouble

 

[finality]

You'll be posting again about this chick. 100% certain.

 

[bigneil]

My last girl tried this crap. I ended the relationship and had a new girl within 5 days.

 

[wolf]

Long story short, she wanted to come over to my house tonight for secs.. she is off work for a week, so she kept telling me she wants to come over for regular secs, as much as possible.. and how horny she is..

we arranged for tonight... then she starts dropping hints about having to leave early from my house, in order to look after her niece.

then she tells me, if she can come over next week (Friday) instead, so she can pick her niece up...

something's that are not making sense here...

01. Why leave it so late in the day to flake, I could have made other plans?

In my opinion and experience. It's to ensure that she minimises the chance of you calling up another one of your plates (should you have any to her unbeknown knowledge) when she isn't around at your beck and call. We all know that not many women who are sitting around at 9pm in their pj's are gonna throw on makeup and lingerie at the last minute to come see you. It's about control and i highly doubt she ever intended to turn up that night anyway for whatever reason. If she flakes a few hours before then this gives you the opportunity to hook up with your plan B.

She is a Manipulator. Is she really worth the headache?

 

[wolf]

Whats fuked me off is I double checked With her and she said she was good to meet, then flaked last minute..

I don't see why I should re arrange for a day that suites her, after she has not taken my precious time into consideration..

I don't want to give the message out, that flaking on me is fine..

Been there, done that and owned that t-shirt. This girl has you riled up. That's something i would never tolerate ever again!! The power of Pu$$y...

 

[soulforge]

You'll be posting again about this chick. 100% certain.

You know what.. i am pretty certain i will be...

This is why I will be distancing myslef from her..

 

[darksprezzatura]

Look at how you are talking about her man.

Calling her names like b1tch and cvnt or devaluing her logically will NOT kill your attraction to her.

You are pissed at her because you think she's playing with your heart. But you are letting her play with it, which is making her disrespect you even more by chit testing harder.

A woman chit testing you means that she's attracted to you or she'll just ignore you because wtf can you do?


There are girls who I know who text me by saying 'Let's meet but we aren't having sex tonight'.

I've been called 'crazy, @sshole, douchebag'

Just 15 minutes earlier my main girl texted 'You are a psycho b1tch'

I mean cmon man what do you think chit tests are if they are all hopping on my c0ck and smiling afterwards?

She's flaking and not meeting you because you are needy and butt hurt and need to grow some balls.

Get a damn life man. I won't apologise for tough love.

Do that and she'll come to you. But if you do that with the intention of making her come to you, you are done.

So when us guys tell you to next her, we don't want you to lose pvssy, we want you to get a life and not focus on her so you can get her.

A man's attraction is fairly consistent and doesn't end by using logic.

On the other hand, a woman's attraction is fickle that's why they chit test, if you pass they'll hop on you, if you fail they'll actually be sad.

Women want us to win and that's why I love them all.

Except uglies.

 

[soulforge]

My last girl tried this crap. I ended the relationship and had a new girl within 5 days.

There could be genuine reasons here... she did mention last week, that she would have to look after her grandaughter on day...

But she said Thursday morning...

What is odd is... she texted me earlier today (midday) and mentioned that she will leave my house early in the morning, so she can be back in time for her grandaughter.

I sent her a text, and just asked, are still planning to come over or not?

She responded.. yes i do, why?

I said.. ok just checking so i can sort my day out...

Later she asked me, if i was working the weekend, told her no i am off work...

I could tell by now a flake was coming... she then text saying can i meet you Friday instead..

My response.. you should have made me aware a little earlier, but its cool not a problem


Her - i will come down, if we are going to fall out over it.

Me - its cool, its not a problem


So i don't know man, she may have valid reason...

What is odd is.. why she is leaving it till weekend..

She has rest of the week free, and been telling me how horny she is, and wanting lots of sex

 

[AJ84]

Whats fuked me off is I double checked With her and she said she was good to meet, then flaked last minute..

I don't see why I should re arrange for a day that suites her, after she has not taken my precious time into consideration..

I don't want to give the message out, that flaking on me is fine..

I agree you don't want to give out that message. But she is a plate, like you said, so how invested or considerate do you want her to be if she knows she's just a plate. Why should she care that much? I'm not trying to be snarky I'm just stating that she's not someone you're invested in if she's a plate so, maybe flaking is to be expected.

 

[bigneil]

You need to take a week off and kiss the lips of another woman.

 

[soulforge]

Look at how you are talking about her man.

Calling her names like b1tch and cvnt or devaluing her logically will NOT kill your attraction to her.

You are pissed at her because you think she's playing with your heart. But you are letting her play with it, which is making her disrespect you even more by chit testing harder.

A woman chit testing you means that she's attracted to you or she'll just ignore you because wtf can you do?


There are girls who I know who text me by saying 'Let's meet but we aren't having sex tonight'.

I've been called 'crazy, @sshole, douchebag'

Just 15 minutes earlier my main girl texted 'You are a psycho b1tch'

I mean cmon man what do you think chit tests are if they are all hopping on my c0ck and smiling afterwards?

She's flaking and not meeting you because you are needy and butt hurt and need to grow some balls.

Get a damn life man. I won't apologise for tough love.

Do that and she'll come to you. But if you do that with the intention of making her come to you, you are done.

So when us guys tell you to next her, we don't want you to lose pvssy, we want you to get a life and not focus on her so you can get her.

A man's attraction is fairly consistent and doesn't end by using logic.

On the other hand, a woman's attraction is fickle that's why they chit test, if you pass they'll hop on you, if you fail they'll actually be sad.

Women want us to win and that's why I love them all.

Except uglies.

I hear what you are saying man... but to be honest, i'm not much bothered that i am not banging this plate tonight

I just don't like having my time wasted man... last minute flake, is pretty disrespectful and lack of respect for my time...

But your right man... just gona get on with chit... might hook up with her at the weekend... or may not...

I will take lead, and decide when.. other than that... i'm working on getting other plates!

 

[AJ84]

That would be great man, but it's not long since i come out of a LTR so i am currently working on that..

I this one plate, who flaked on me tonight.. I have another plate, but she is long distance, i only see her once every two or so..

Still working on more plates... worse thing is, I was horny as fuk today.. haha

Its weird, she has a week off work, she kept asking me that she wants to spend as much of it as possible coming over for secs...

She then flakes, and wants to re arrange for next week..

Something does not add up, she has all this week free...

Possibly another dog in the yard lol... fuk her, will distance myself and just **** her on my terms only...

If she walks, then her loss!!

Well, if she's a casual hook up for you chances are she's a casual hook up for other guys as well. I mean, plates aren't exactly the kind of girls who are exclusive are they? Why would they be?

 

[wolf]

I hear what you are saying man... but to be honest, i'm not much bothered that i am not banging this plate tonight

I just don't like having my time wasted man... last minute flake, is pretty disrespectful and lack of respect for my time...

But your right man... just gona get on with chit... might hook up with her at the weekend... or may not...

I will take lead, and decide when.. other than that... i'm working on getting other plates!

Have you ever heard of intermittent reinforcement? Because that is what she appears to be doing to you. It's a Hallmark of Narcissism . If she was a constant and reliable women then she would drop down in your estimation and become option B or C and she knows it so she is keeping you thinking about her and causing you to post threads on sosuave. Her job is complete.