How to cope with depression after breakup?

[RickyBobby83]

It's been about 2 months since my ex of two years moved out of my house. Since then I haven't been sleeping well, am starting to hate my job (even though I haven't had any sick days), am feeling lonely because I live alone, and don't want to watch movies/TV/sports at home because it feels like I need to get out of the house.

I have a funny feeling my ex-girlfriend just started having sex with a new guy and it makes me feel like crap. I've been on a few dates recently but I feel depressed and the women i've meet are not the hottest.

Anyone have any advice?

 

[vinkoch]

you'll get better. you can talk yourself into all this all that moving on letting go stuff but only time will make it better. best thing to do is find yourself a hobby or a project. do something for yourself. just don't get in that mental place where you're thinking you've lost the perfect female. not true.

 

[Slickster]

Get revenge! Not real revenge, but use this break-up as a stepping stone.

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=34509

 

[evan12]

I was depressed and lonely lately , but registering in some college courses took my depression .
The best way is to be with another woman , but if that hard then try the first one .

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Ricky,
Go to Dancing lessons,Yoga or tech courses...try smiling and laughing as much as you can...feeling good makes you do that and it works in reverse,a little....stay around other people as much as possible...Libraries,hardware stores,Asian groceries.... just strike up conversations...One can never kill any emotional issue only sublimate it,you just gott'a get back up on the saddle!

 

[Tictac]

Hit the gym - 4 times a week minimum.

Do 30 minutes cardio each session.

 

[gov87]

Hey buddy, it's good you came here for support. You can trust the guys here to steer you in the right direction.

As for getting back on track and getting rid of the depression, you need to focus on youself... first, with small things. Think of it like this, wake up and say that you're going to do one thing good for yourself that day- whether it be working out, paying a couple bills, cleaning out your vehicle, or doing some laundry, etc. No matter how small, it's a step forward.

I highly encourage exercising even if it's a quick 10 minute run or 30 minute lift. Also, remind yourself that there are tons of other guys going through exactly what you are, some of which are way worse. But, have compassion for yourself and make those small strides. They'll slowly accumulate and you'll find yourself feeling better.

Talk here when you need and offer advice to others on their situations, that helps even more. Hang in there dude, you'll come back better than before. Trust me.

 

[Wraithe]

These guys are spot on, focusing on yourself is the only way to not feel like ****..

Nose to the grindstone in all your work and hobbies. Lift weights and do cardio. Read/listen to motivational audio books. Meet new women. Understand that all is temporary and you're in the next chapter, a better one, now.

You'll be off the couch, you'll feel great and sleep like a baby.

 

[Slickster]

I was depressed and lonely lately , but registering in some college courses took my depression .

This great advice as well.

It doesn't matter the subject, I always feel my best when my mind is expanding and learning new things.

 

[ladiesgod]

How do you get to the point where you feel this depressed over a chick? Sheesh.

Sounds like you made this chick your reason to live. Now that she's gone all you have to live for is work to survive. Freaking sad.

1. Rearrange your mind frame. I've been with mine for 4yrs. If she leaves then **** it. I'm always ready for that. Only thing guaranteed in life is DEATH. Make her number 3 or 4 priority. Women don't respect being #1 in any man's life.

2. Get yourself more women. About 3. You will quickly forget about her. You've been out of the game and your head is still shoved up this chicks ass so it will be tough but fucc some fat pof hoes to get your mojo back up.

3. Trust me dude. Change your mommy I need a hug attitude and you'll realize you're about to start having real fun. You live alone...get some *****es over. Use the free chatlines like live links. Alwqys easy hoes on there. Quit acting like a b1tch.

 

[scrouds]

I'm not the biggest fan of doctors or drugs, but if you feel like you can't handle it, it's too much, it's too hard to cope, then seek professional help.

 

[SoSuave666]

You need a complete re-hash on the way you are thinking. Stop thinking about YOUR life in terms of HER. Let me help:

Beta: "She is starting to sleep with someone else."
Alpha: Either "I'm fvcking someone else" or "I plan to fvck someone else and here is how I'm going to do it."

Beta: "I feel lonely because she is not here."
Alpha: "I have too many girls in my life right now"

Beta: "I hate my job because she broke up with me"
Alpha: "I need a new passion to follow because my current job is not satisfying my needs."

Beta: "I don't want to be at home and watch tv because I need to be out of the house to be productive and take my mind off her"
Alpha: "I need to get out of the house and accomplish my goals"

Beta: "The women I have met with do not compare to my ex"
Alpha: "These chicks out here are not doing it for me--time to step my game up and get hotter ones"

A few more you may be thinking:

Beta: "I can't focus because she tore my whole world apart when she left me."
Alpha: "This sh!t I'm doing right now is boring and my mind wanders. What can I do to improve?"

Beta: "She doesn't love me anymore."
Alpha: "I don't love her anymore."

Beta: "I will never find someone as good as her."
Alpha: "I have the opportunity to meet someone better than her."


Go out and meet new people. You are past the mourning stages of this breakup. That means you have stopped crying, you can have normal conversations with people, and you are feeling better. Be proud of yourself, hit the gym, and go out on dates with LOADS of women. Do it.

 

[The_411]

There's no time table. However, the best way to get speeding that time table is to work on yourself.

Get to the gym, get social, improve your career. Clean up your diet, find your triggers and find ways to counteract your sadness. Set up daily challenges weekly challenges short term goals, intermediate term goals and long term goals and go for it don't half ass it or quit.

It's not easy but you can waste time wallowing or spend the time well building

Today is Wednesday get in the gym and get started. Go out on Friday even if it's by yourself with the aim of experiencing and having fun don't put any expectation on the night.