How to convince a plate to hit the gym?

Fortune_favors_the_bold

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I'm currently dating a sweet pretty girl who happens to think that we're a couple despite I made it clear countless time that we are not.

She is in good shape and would probably be in the top 20% in western europe already now yet she doesnt do any sport which is a pity cause her body frame and genetics are very good and only few months of training and proper eating could easily make her fitness model tier.

I told her that, exactly as I wrote here in the second paragraph and she said she would if we would go together however we dont live in the same neightbourhood and the gym is my mental therapy even before my physical one so I only train with few like minded fellas.

What would you in my place?

ps, jealousy doesnt work cause she knows that I'm dating other girls despite knowing she is the main one.
 

HaleyBaron

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"You can lead a ho to water, but you can't make her think."

 

BillyPilgrim

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I'm currently dating a sweet pretty girl who happens to think that we're a couple despite I made it clear countless time that we are not.

She is in good shape and would probably be in the top 20% in western europe already now yet she doesnt do any sport which is a pity cause her body frame and genetics are very good and only few months of training and proper eating could easily make her fitness model tier.

I told her that, exactly as I wrote here in the second paragraph and she said she would if we would go together however we dont live in the same neightbourhood and the gym is my mental therapy even before my physical one so I only train with few like minded fellas.

What would you in my place?

ps, jealousy doesnt work cause she knows that I'm dating other girls despite knowing she is the main one.
This girl is acting possessively and feels like you owe her to begin with, so imo you'd have to leave and then come back for this to work.
 

Fortune_favors_the_bold

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This girl is acting possessively and feels like you owe her to begin with, so imo you'd have to leave and then come back for this to work.
You're correct, she has a toothbrush and a pair of slippers in my flat and she told me not to let the other girls use them.

Regarding the leaving and coming back what you mean exactly? you mean emotionally of physically?

Cause often times if I have stuff to do I Ieave the city for weeks and basically chat to her seldom on whatsapp.

Is her not going to the gym why she is still a plate? Or are there other reasons?
That's an interesting question, the reasons for which she is just a plate are many but the gym thing is among the most important.
There is too much difference in terms of life style and at my age the desire to compromise is very low, even lower than the one to commit.


Tell her to put on her 'big girl panties' and go by herself or with a girlfriend, why does she need YOU to go with her?

It's the gym for heaven's sake.:rolleyes:

How old is she?
That's what I told her, she is 28.
 

EyeBRollin

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That's an interesting question, the reasons for which she is just a plate are many but the gym thing is among the most important.
There is too much difference in terms of life style and at my age the desire to compromise is very low, even lower than the one to commit.
If you don’t plan on promoting her, why are you trying to change her? She’s just a plate….
 

Fortune_favors_the_bold

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If you don’t plan on promoting her, why are you trying to change her? She’s just a plate….
Cause it may work if she does, everything else is a green flag and altought we're far from passion it seems like a good choice for a ltr.
 

Stanley

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ARE YOU BODY SHAMING A WOMAN YOU BIGOT?!:mad:

lol

I wouldn't bother trying to change someone who doesn't want to change. Is a shame, but what can you do aside from what you've already said? Blows my mind if the genders were flipped and a woman told you to get in shape that's fine, but a man telling a woman to do the same is often seen as controlling shallow behavior.
 

EyeBRollin

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Cause it may work if she does, everything else is a green flag and altought we're far from passion it seems like a good choice for a ltr.
You just said the opposite though:
There is too much difference in terms of life style and at my age the desire to compromise is very low, even lower than the one to commit.
Which is it? Do you plan to promote the girl if she starts working out?
 

pipeman84

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If she was really into you, she would go to the gym, considering that you lead by example and you told her that the gym would benefit her.
Furthermore, she doesn't sound that smart or has some issues:
I'm currently dating a sweet pretty girl who happens to think that we're a couple despite I made it clear countless time that we are not.
 

Fortune_favors_the_bold

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You just said the opposite though:


Which is it? Do you plan to promote the girl if she starts working out?
There are too many difference in terms of life style cause she DOES NOT hit the gym and follow such path, if she would then those difference wouldnt be there.

If she starts working out her chance of being promoted will drastically increase.

Regarding my desire to commit being low, it's overall not related to her in particular.
 

LTG71

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You can’t convince someone to do what they don’t whole heartedly want to do. The gym for you is like therapy like you said, it is a positive place that you value. She doesn’t have this same mindset. Some people are lazy and don’t make fitness a part of their life style. I workout in some form everyday while the rest of my family (20+ ppl) doesn‘t do anything at all. The rest of them are all over weight and some obese. I do it because it makes me feel good, mentally and physically.

Any woman that you have to convince to appreciate this aspect of life is a lost cause. I know a woman that used to have a ridiculous body 12 years ago, but she was too lazy to workout and today she feels miserable because her once chiseled a$$ has doubled in size and now she rambles the “body positivity“ rhetoric. How about a body positive mindset before you end up like Lizzo? I know another woman in her 50’s, post four kids, runs everyday rain or shine, has a smoking body for her age and a great attitude because she looks and feels good. She has the mindset you want to be around.

You wishing she would tone up is like wishing a fish could climb a tree. Gonna have to accept how she is or find another plate that is already in the gym doing the work. It gets old too having to drag women along to do things. One woman I know can’t do anything without someone by her side. OMG, like dealing with a toddler. Fuk that!
 

Divorced w 3

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I'm currently dating a sweet pretty girl who happens to think that we're a couple despite I made it clear countless time that we are not.

She is in good shape and would probably be in the top 20% in western europe already now yet she doesnt do any sport which is a pity cause her body frame and genetics are very good and only few months of training and proper eating could easily make her fitness model tier.

I told her that, exactly as I wrote here in the second paragraph and she said she would if we would go together however we dont live in the same neightbourhood and the gym is my mental therapy even before my physical one so I only train with few like minded fellas.

What would you in my place?

ps, jealousy doesnt work cause she knows that I'm dating other girls despite knowing she is the main one.
Why can’t you work out with her? Does the idea of endorphins and the resulting monkey sex turn you off? My ex wife was not a gym rat at all. She went to a kickboxing class once and she couldn’t get out of bed later that afternoon. Give her a taste of it and casually discuss friends with her that she could potentially go with. If she doesn’t keep going you should probably just accept who she is and make a determination.
 

BackInTheGame78

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I'm currently dating a sweet pretty girl who happens to think that we're a couple despite I made it clear countless time that we are not.

She is in good shape and would probably be in the top 20% in western europe already now yet she doesnt do any sport which is a pity cause her body frame and genetics are very good and only few months of training and proper eating could easily make her fitness model tier.

I told her that, exactly as I wrote here in the second paragraph and she said she would if we would go together however we dont live in the same neightbourhood and the gym is my mental therapy even before my physical one so I only train with few like minded fellas.

What would you in my place?

ps, jealousy doesnt work cause she knows that I'm dating other girls despite knowing she is the main one.
Be careful what you ask for...

You'll push her to start working out, she will get in better shape and start having higher tier men hit on her...and perhaps push her right out the door to them.
 
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