How to age gracefully?

[viking22]

I hit 40 this summer. I have a bit of a baby face which gives me a bit of a youthful look and I eat healthy and don't drink too much and exercise.
But I have quite a few white hairs on my chest and my beard along with some expression lines and weathering on my face and I don't have the masculine good looks that benefit from age e.g. Steve McQueen, John Wayne, George Clooney, Jon Hamm etc.

There are things such as retinol, vitamin C serum, moisturizing, Botox etc that women use to stay looking young. But it is expensive and it would be fighting a losing battle.

Other thing I considered was embracing the fact that I am no longer "cute" or "pretty" and trying to develop a more rugged appearance e.g. cutting my hair short, bulking up a bit and packing on some muscle etc. Maybe getting a silver chain or something around my neck. And sporting an all year round tan.

Of course women age faster than men but they have cosmetics and are willing to invest in all the beauty treatments

 

[Bible_Belt]

Get rid of the gray beard.

 

[Slowhandluke]

I hit 40 this summer. I have a bit of a baby face which gives me a bit of a youthful look and I eat healthy and don't drink too much and exercise.
But I have quite a few white hairs on my chest and my beard along with some expression lines and weathering on my face and I don't have the masculine good looks that benefit from age e.g. Steve McQueen, John Wayne, George Clooney, Jon Hamm etc.

There are things such as retinol, vitamin C serum, moisturizing, Botox etc that women use to stay looking young. But it is expensive and it would be fighting a losing battle.

Other thing I considered was embracing the fact that I am no longer "cute" or "pretty" and trying to develop a more rugged appearance e.g. cutting my hair short, bulking up a bit and packing on some muscle etc. Maybe getting a silver chain or something around my neck. And sporting an all year round tan.

Of course women age faster than men but they have cosmetics and are willing to invest in all the beauty treatments

you have too much free time... when in doubt ask yourself what John Wayne would do... or Elon musk (most of the time...)...

when you start fixating on your looks... you are going down a bad path. at a certain age, men are suppose to be the "rock" of their social group... the leader... if you aren't, ask yourself why.

 

[Scaramouche]

I hit 40 this summer. I have a bit of a baby face which gives me a bit of a youthful look and I eat healthy and don't drink too much and exercise.
But I have quite a few white hairs on my chest and my beard along with some expression lines and weathering on my face and I don't have the masculine good looks that benefit from age e.g. Steve McQueen, John Wayne, George Clooney, Jon Hamm etc.

There are things such as retinol, vitamin C serum, moisturizing, Botox etc that women use to stay looking young. But it is expensive and it would be fighting a losing battle.

Other thing I considered was embracing the fact that I am no longer "cute" or "pretty" and trying to develop a more rugged appearance e.g. cutting my hair short, bulking up a bit and packing on some muscle etc. Maybe getting a silver chain or something around my neck. And sporting an all year round tan.

Of course women age faster than men but they have cosmetics and are willing to invest in all the beauty treatments

Hi Viking,
Be like your namesakes....Live fast,die young and make a beautiful corpse!

 

[Westminster]

I hit 40 this summer. I have a bit of a baby face which gives me a bit of a youthful look and I eat healthy and don't drink too much and exercise.
But I have quite a few white hairs on my chest and my beard along with some expression lines and weathering on my face and I don't have the masculine good looks that benefit from age e.g. Steve McQueen, John Wayne, George Clooney, Jon Hamm etc.

There are things such as retinol, vitamin C serum, moisturizing, Botox etc that women use to stay looking young. But it is expensive and it would be fighting a losing battle.

Other thing I considered was embracing the fact that I am no longer "cute" or "pretty" and trying to develop a more rugged appearance e.g. cutting my hair short, bulking up a bit and packing on some muscle etc. Maybe getting a silver chain or something around my neck. And sporting an all year round tan.

Of course women age faster than men but they have cosmetics and are willing to invest in all the beauty treatments

Beards make people look older especially when they start to grey (and beards tend to go grey before the rest of your hair), so getting rid of the beard might help. But bulking up tends to make people look a bit older and tanning will age your skin if you do it long-term.

It's a losing battle whatever you do though so I'd just lean into it.

 

[viking22]

I always kept a bit of stubble as it offset my baby face and give me a more masculine look. And used to show off my chest hair for the same reason (and a lot of women over the years have commented how it was a turn on how hairy I am). But yes I can go cleanshaven and trim the chest hair so the strands of white hair (it is only about 5-10%) are less noticeable.

Part of the reason I am concerned is that at 40 I get filtered out based on age range by most attractive women on the dating apps. So usually knock off about five years off my age. I've been getting away with it as I am youthful looking aside from the tells I mentioned.

But maybe I just need to accept that on dating apps I have fewer options and focus my attentions on women in my age range and the minority of younger women open to dating a man 5-10 years old.

Of course most women by their mid 30s have grey hairs that they dye and their skin usually ages faster than men and therefore a lot are using Botox, retinol, more make up, and endless moisturisers.

Some seem to just embrace it and while I admire them for that hypocritically I find it a turn off.

 

[AmsterdamAssassin]

I don't get the obsession with youth, must be an American thing.

 

[Gamisch]

-keep working out. Better: work out even more. You still have the energy while your metabolism is slowing down.

- stay lean. Watch what you eat.

- dye your hair/ beard. Especially beard

-consider some surgical treatments

-keep.your wardrobe fresh. Not childish, but yet fresh.

I don't get the obsession with youth, must be an American thing.

Nope it's a human thing.

 

[Kiranel]

I totally get where you're coming from. I hit 40 a little while ago, and I’ve started noticing similar changes—some gray hairs, a few lines, and the whole “not as youthful” thing. I’ve thought about trying to fight it with stuff like skincare or even Botox, but I think I’m leaning more toward embracing the change. I’ve been hitting the gym more, cutting my hair shorter, and actually playing with the idea of a more rugged look. I’ve also found that focusing on feeling confident and comfortable with my appearance has made a huge difference.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Part of the reason I am concerned is that at 40 I get filtered out based on age range by most attractive women on the dating apps. So usually knock off about five years off my age. I've been getting away with it as I am youthful looking aside from the tells I mentioned.

But maybe I just need to accept that on dating apps I have fewer options and focus my attentions on women in my age range and the minority of younger women open to dating a man 5-10 years old.

You absolutely can date much younger women.