No kiss on first date is never a good sign. You are not escalating properly or she isnt attracted to you. I usually eject if there is no kiss after the second date and it has to be a kiss thats passionate and she has to be amazing. There are plenty of other women I could be spending my time with that want to kiss me. How passionate are your kisses? Is it full blown make out where she cant keep her hands off you or just a peck? Have you touched her in different areas of the body?
You guys have been friends for two years?! Most women would jump at the chance to "finally" bang him out if she was sexually interested. Sounds like she is using you until Chad comes along. I would pull back, dont ask her out on anymore dates, let her chase you, eventually fit her into your calendar one more time and escalate, grab a drink, go for sex, no dinner bs. If it doesnt happen, its never going to. Put her right back into friendzone and let the bish chase.