How Do You Respond to this or Let her Know Your Mad? (Get in here and read this)

[Dante420]

Learning an important lesson.

Dating broke girls isn't worth it, when they consistently ask you to foot the bill. Especially when she's borderline gold digger.

I reacted to following perfecting but here's examples -
- Dating me for less than a week asked me about what I'm getting her for Christmas - then went on to suggest what I get her (she picked a somewhat pricey item
- When she's bored she has no problem asking me to take her out to dinner or do other things requiring me to spend money. One time even asked me to go out and buy her make-up
- We hang out more often the almighty DJ Bible recommends, so her asking me to spend money happens often.

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So here's where the decision to break-up with her comes, she started giving me head today and then stopped halfway through and I asked her if she was gonna get back to that and she said "Nah, I don't wanna" I was just like "You serious?" and then put it away. I left promptly telling her I didn't feel right. She could tell I was mad so if I don't break up with her she'll probably break up with me tomorrow anyway, she said she was gonna call me tonight and not that I care but she didn't call - I'll leave school tomorrow with at least 2 numbers.


How do you respond to this, clearly a very selfish act on her part and shows a complete disregard for my well-being and happiness (although she's great at tending to those last two things outside of the bed). Would you let her know your mad or just react like I did?

 

[ENIGMA16]

So here's where the decision to break-up with her comes, she started giving me head today and then stopped halfway through and I asked her if she was gonna get back to that and she said "Nah, I don't wanna" I was just like "You serious?"

This is a capital offense, and one which should immediately prompt you to eject.

 

[Dante420]

This is a capital offense, and one which should immediately prompt you to eject.

Ya, the thing is this is in a high school so I don't want people hearing "He broke up with her because she wouldn't give him head" that wouldn't sit well with a lot of people.

Nexting a plate would be easy for this but how do you end a relationship for it? Plus she has some of my belongings at her house (including two rented movies from the other thread)

 

[Dante420]

Ok man.. first off you're letting her effect you way too much.

If it were me and she asked what I was getting her for christmas I would've said something like "A date with santa claus" or "A mansion barbie doll house" or "World peace".. and if she asked again I'd respond similarly. When you don't want to answer stupid questions.. take this approach and than change the subject when you can.

Likewise.. when she was giving you head and than stopped I would've said something stupid like "yeah I was kinda thinking about getting some coffee myself". You wouldn't be able to pull this off though unless you really didn't care if she finished you off -- which would only come if you viewed life as a surprise moment by moment rather than expecting her to finish you off. And I do agree, it was a dyke move on her part.. if she respected you should would've gotten you off. So in my opinion, she's at a point where she doesn't respect you and now she's willing to mess with you to see how far she can take it.

As far as ending the relationship goes.. just meet with her in person and end it. Her having your belongings or people hearing you broke up with her for such and such a reason make no difference.. really think about it. And you're not breaking up with her because she stopped giving you head; it's because she clearly doesn't respect you. The man thing to do is to break it off now.. are you going to do the man thing or let her control you more?

Those are great responses to the Christmas wishlist conversation she made, I just joked around and said "I'm gonna get you a kmart gift card and make-up"

Thanks for the advice, I'll be ending that by tomorrow - if she doesn't beat me to it (which I hope she does) - she knows I'm unhappy so she might try to go for it

 

[Dante420]

But wait, am I just gonna be cold towards her when she approaches me in school? No hug?

Then just say, ya "We needa talk, I was happy with the time we spent togeth but respect is one of the most important components to a relationship and I don't think you respect me, so this isn't going to work out"

If that's not the right way, what is? Ideally I'd like her to try to requalify herself

 

[horaholic]

I dont see what the problem would be for you to tell her she's a selfish bytch and you're over it. Its the truth right?

 

[Unbridled_Phoenix]

I don't get all the discussions I see about what to do *after* a girl has disqualified herself. Should I say this, should I act like that?

Who effin cares?!

I don't say or do anything with women who give me sh!t; I get on my horse and ride away. Even before I found SS, I usually knew when it was time to be a rare commodity. Now, I don't think of it like that; it's just time to move on.

 

[Dante420]

Alright a little help with this.

This would only be my second time in a relationship and that means it's my second time breaking it off, so I don't know what to do.

I really need more details on what to do so I can come off looking good, word of mouth means a lot especially in close-nit communities (such as a school).

horaholic where are you?

 

[horaholic]

Just calmly tell her you deserve better, and she's selfish, then walk away. If only looks bad on you, if stalk her, or be creepy afterwards. Dont bad mouth her, but if people ask, just tell them it just didnt work out. There is no way to make yourself look better. She might go around and talk shyt about you, but dont worry about it. Thats our of your control. Break it off like a man, be cordial if you see her, and thats that. Just BE COOL about it.

 

[drak_ool]

I didnt read the other comments, so maybe i m repeating some things, but here we go:

Run for the hills! This girl is not dating you. She s using you for your money. She s manipulating you left and right, taking advantage of your naivity.

Since she s already established a pattern where you are her sugar daddy, there s not much to do for you other than walk away. You won't turn a gold digger into a good girlfriend with just words. And in fact why would you want this girl as a girlfriend anyways?

But if you do walk away now and don't contact her for a few weeks, then her interest level might go up again. In that case, follow the advice given in the million other "no contact" threads: act disinterested, DO NOT PAY FOR ANYTHING, and let her be the one begging you to keep her. But this time around you ll know better than fall for her.

I say at best you ll have her as a f.uck buddy in the future. But for now cut your loses and move on.

 

[Vice]

Dude, who CARES what other people think of you?

Just tell her that she's not what you're looking for and that's that. Don't talk smack about her.

 

[Dante420]

Just calmly tell her you deserve better, and she's selfish, then walk away. If only looks bad on you, if stalk her, or be creepy afterwards. Dont bad mouth her, but if people ask, just tell them it just didnt work out. There is no way to make yourself look better. She might go around and talk shyt about you, but dont worry about it. Thats our of your control. Break it off like a man, be cordial if you see her, and thats that. Just BE COOL about it.

Do I really say that? Shouldn't I just say something like "Your a great girl but this relationship isn't heading the way I want it to"

This is so awkward because she always is trying to meet up with me inbetween classes so I'll have to do this in school. . . . .

 

[WC2]

Dude, who CARES what other people think of you?

Just tell her that she's not what you're looking for and that's that. Don't talk smack about her.

A simple solution to a simple problem.