How do you cut loose a friend without hurting him?

Swoop

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When you have a friend that starts to become toxic to you life, how do you cut him loose without hurting him?
 

reyalp

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tell him that next time you guys hang out you're going to invite your preacher friend over to share the good word with him.
 

Scrumtulescence

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If he's truly a "friend" and not just some acquaintance you hang out with, have you tried helping him first before ejecting him from your life?
 

Swoop

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Originally posted by Scrumtulescence
If he's truly a "friend" and not just some acquaintance you hang out with, have you tried helping him first before ejecting him from your life?
He is a friend. We kick it almost every night. We had fun but I have grown. I am no longer into the wild life anymore. He is still into it. I tried to make him grow with me. But you can't help someone who doesn't want to be help. He loves this type of life style. I am moving on to brighter and better things. So now, it's hard to say no to him when he calls me up to go out. I even told him I am giving it up. But he doesn't understand. He thinks I am just going thru some phase and tries to get me back in it. He doesn't understand I really have move on. He is very stubborn He won't listen until he figure things on his own. And lately, he has been making things difficult on me. I value our past but if he doesn't want to grow with me but actually holding me back, I came to the conclusion, I have to cut him loose. But I don't want to hurt him as he has been a pal to me ever since we met.
 

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ObieJuan

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Honestly, it doesn't really matter. I had a friend like this a while ago. This guy was a momma's boy and a loser. I tried everything to get him to attend school, get a decent job and gain some respect...none of which he ever did. He even used to want to borrow things and also smashed my window while drunk one night arguing with his g/f- turns out he felt he shouldn't have to pay in any sort of way since I had sold the car later on afterward. Later on I found out his girl was trying to get back at him by cheating on me. I even told him what's up and invited her over after he said in a number of words he didn't care. The day after he changed his mind...but I already did the damn thing. He finds out, and asks how I can do this to him, blah blah blah...then stops talking to me for a while. Now every now and again he'll try to contact me but I have no respect for him since he got back with that girl- it demonstrated exactly what I needed to prove to myself he would never be a true friend. On top of all this he lies to people, including me- his so-called "best friend".

All I'm saying is you'll have to find your own reasons. Good luck bro.
 

StrangeButTrue

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There's no way to do it without hurting him. I've cut loose my share of friends since I began to shed my AFC ways.

One way is no better than the next. Next time he does something ****ty to you, make a big deal out of it to piss him off.

Don't talk to him a lot, avoid hanging out with him. You guys will drift apart.
 

Chillisauce

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I'm a master at burning bridges, i'm not even sure there is a way to leave a friend without cutting them up.

Mayb try cutting back on the amount of time you spend with him bit by bit each week until eventually you only see him once a fortnight.
 

Kerensky

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Let him do the work for you. Your only task it to say no and make up excuses to not hang out with him. Slowly he will hate you and want to cut you off.

good luck soldier
 

Swoop

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thanks for the tips. Yea I am gonna go with the drift apart method. I haven't hang out with him for almost 2 weeks now. He still calls me up but he's started to doubt I'll be available to hang out since I have been shooting him down lately. But my reasons are solid ones. We'll see how it goes..
 
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