How can I get to know her better ? And become funnier ?

[SpoonJedi]

Hi guys
Yesterday went to a birthday party of a friend of mine, there were like 7 guys there and 4 girls. I basically spent 4 hours there, and only spoke to the girls in the last hour. Made some stupid jokes with a friend of mine that is black (the most racist guy I've ever met) and some other stupid stuff with a shrimp that kinda made people laugh (altough I was having fun at doing so, so yeah not doing that to amuse them).

Basically I shared a few words with one of the girls, a blonde HB, 7-8, one year younger, best friend of my friend's girlfriendn I think I made her laugh, but seriously don't remember. I've added her on fb but she hasnt accepted yet. The thing is, I was talking to my friend and he said that she was pretty hard to get. And given that my social skills are a bit.. well not trained. My chances are probably not the highest. Some friends of mine, girls, even joke I know tons of people but never get anything done.


But I wanna try my best with this girl, I've been talking to other one in fb but she hasnt said anything in like 2 days and I'm sick of being a puppy (altough I dont think I'm much of a puppy). I don't wanna look desperate, but I just enjoy talking to new people, otherwise I get bored. And I can't stand being bored, so I want to have fun.

So I'm planning on greeting her tomorrow with a kiss in the cheek if I see her at school, but I don't really know how to go from that, if she's with friends I shouldn't take too much time right? If she's alone should I, like, put conversation ?! My friend told me to: "1º make her like u, 2º she has to enjoy to spend time with u and 3º make her laugh and 4º kiss xD", but this seems not helpfull at all. I'm either a guy that goes crazy mode and doesn't even think about what are the consequences or simply, think too much (most of the time).
I'm afraid I'm not funny (when I make girls laugh its mostly by teasing) or that my humor isn't that appropriate (the only humor I'm normally good with is dark humor, not that appropriate when metting girls ), do u have any tips to become a little more, "funny" ?

Thx dudes !

 

[Anima]

This isn't my most experienced field, but I can tell you to address her friends if she's with them. You need to make them like you do they don't try to convince her you're bad news.

 

[Aspiring Don Juan]

The number One thing I use to make girls laugh is by teasing them. I learned this maybe a year ago, and I've gotten so good at it that I can have girls laughing for the whole conversation. Just pick on funny things that they do; like if they mispronounce a word, I pick on them for it, or if they drop something, I call them clumsy. You get what I'm saying? Watch your boundaries though, and avoid actually criticizing her, and make it very clear you're joking

 

[SpoonJedi]

Thanks for the quick answer guys.
I really need to be funny, the girl seems like a real nice one and I dont wanna miss any opportunity I might have, if the situation gives me chance I'll tease the best I can, I guess I can be funny that way if in a good day.
About the friends, I'm fearful of that situation, if she's with my friends girlfriend I can try to adress the party were I met them, otherwise I fear I'll just go there say hi and kiss on the cheek and then run away ._.

 

[Anima]

The number One thing I use to make girls laugh is by teasing them. I learned this maybe a year ago, and I've gotten so good at it that I can have girls laughing for the whole conversation. Just pick on funny things that they do; like if they mispronounce a word, I pick on them for it, or if they drop something, I call them clumsy. You get what I'm saying? Watch your boundaries though, and avoid actually criticizing her, and make it very clear you're joking

I do this, too, and can vouch for it. It works great. This, and playful imitation. If they pose a certain way or do something, do the same and tease them about it. Mimicry is the "flirting" of nature; you can see it in tons of different animals and mating rituals.

Summary: teasing works really well. Just make sure you're teasing and not criticizing.

 

[SpoonJedi]

To be funny use your environment, what she says, and what she does. Never tease her about decisions she makes, because then you're criticizing her judgement which is a big no-no.
Being funny takes lots of practice. You have to read people, figure out their sense of humor, and learn when to and when not to make a funny comment. It's not easy but it will come with practice. The more you put yourself out there and don't care what others think, the more funny you'll become. Let's say you tell a semi-dark joke that some uptight people might be "offended" by. If you say it with a ****y little smile and a light-hearted face, they'll probably laugh. Be confident that others will laugh when you tell a joke.

Also, a kiss may not be the best way to go about this ESPECIALLY if she's in a group of friends. You need to introduce yourself to each and every one of her friends before you start a conversation with her. Make them feel included and good about you. They will then help persuade her that you're a good guy. The power of peer pressure is real, and if you don't introduce yourself they'll dislike you and persuade her not to like you. She'll feel social pressure to stay away from you then and you'll lose all hope.

Just say hi, nice to meet you all I'm (name). Maybe shake a few hands, be charismatic, charming and friendly. It will go a long way.

Thanks, that really is insightful
Just a thing, should hi shake hands with her friends or just kiss them all in the cheek (if they are only girls) ? I'm thinking on going like, Hi, kiss her in the cheek and her friends (if she's with friends) and then ask her if she as seen my friend (the guy at whose party I met her) and then politely go away, I'm not sure I can handle a full conversation if she's with her friends.
If she's with friends (girls and guy) do the same but handshake the guys (kiss in the cheek might not be the best in that situation ahahah) and ask the same thing ?

I only fear I get nervous and when I do I can't say anything decent :/

 

[SpoonJedi]

The fear is also like, not be wanted there when making a conversation, but I guess I must ignore it, do whatever feels good and if I see I'm losing then say I gotta go meet someone and run like I never ran before ahahah

Thanks for the tips Ruler, it was a great help !

 

[SpoonJedi]

Kinda failed today, didnt see her ... so I will try tomorrow and worst case scenario day after tomorrow, I do want her to remember me from the birthday party and hopefully my shrimp comedy session. In other news, 2 other guys that went to the party are after her, and I think they got to talk more with her in the party :/ (not from my school, but bad anyway). And worst news, she kinda didnt accept my fb invite. I'll do it anyway because I really like to get over the awkward, and it's all about numbers right ?

 

[Highschoolkidzz]

Hey I actually wrote up an article about how to be funnier. Check it out maybe it will help
How to be funny