Hostility among men

hostel

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How do you deal with other dudes who see you as a threat or competitor?

There is something in me that I'm worried about other men (who are jealous or see me as a threat or competition). Most guys they are okay but some are really nasty.

What are your experiences? When would you try to befriend the guy (even he shows disrespect towards you) versus ignoring him completely?
 

Murk

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Lift weights and be dominant, be prepared and unphased to escalate any confrontation to violence. This is the upbringing I had, I'm 33 now and mellowed, and have too much to lose, but I will not be made a fool of in public or intimidated by anyone.

It's funny because I was tested a lot when younger, I was too kind for my own good, that turned into aggression and I nearly went to prison for 2 years (I got a suspended sentence and tag/ankle bracelet for a year) for fighting.

Some people just need a slap, in this generation, everyone talks tough, and we need to normalise low-level physical violence in response to disrespect. You will soon have people acting right.

I've spoken about this before and I'm aware most of the forum disagrees with me on this. I've even had women argue with me when they are barged into or pushed when I'm with them, I can't allow things like that to go unchecked for my own mental health.
 

corsica

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A friend will admire your success. A foe will be jealous of it.

Trying to befriend a foe will not change his jealousy and he will take the first opportunity to stab you in the back (figuratively). Stay away.
 

Hal9000

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Why would try to befriend someone who obviously doesn't like you, regardless of their reason?
 

The Duke

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The only type of guys I ever have issues with are insecure.

Two incidents stand out...I was at a crowded bar with a Brazilian HB8 $tripper I was dating. She was very exotic looking so she drew a ton of attention. I was holding her hand as we tried to navigate thru the crowd. Some random meathead rams his shoulder into me for no reason. It was all about jealousy. Here I was way smaller, and not as attractive as this tool and I had the hot girl. Typical insecure try-hard meathead lacking confidence. I just ignored him.

Another meathead was working out at my gym with his HB9 girlfriend. They had 3 different machines tied up. After waiting several minutes I walked over to the one they weren't using and ask the girl if I can use it. She says yes and moved her bag then he goes ballistic on me. Accuses me of hitting on his girl. The gym manager heard all of this and walked over. I said my piece then got on the machine while the meathead continued to argue with the gym manager. His girlfriend was totally embarrassed and apologized to me.

Always best to ignore without being weak, but don't escalate these situations.

One other situation where I did escalate...I was at a bar standing in the drink line and some rich/old guy cut in front of me and several others. There were two hot blondes watching me. I called out the old guy and told him to go to the back of the line. He got angry, and wanted to fight. I told him I wasn't interested and he just needed to have some manners. Eventually he goes back to his table. He sends his daughter up and gives me a $100 bill and says her dad was sorry. I refused at first but then accepted. I turned to the two hot blondes and told them drinks were on the azzhole, order whatever you want. They were impressed how I handled the situation. We got our drinks, and these girls hung out with me the rest of the night. From the start I knew they were attracted to me and played them both like a fiddle. Didn't let them know which one I really wanted until the end of the night. Ended up going home with the younger one. That was the only time in my life I ever bought drinks for a girl!
 

Veréngárda

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Lift weights and be dominant, be prepared and unphased to escalate any confrontation to violence. This is the upbringing I had, I'm 33 now and mellowed, and have too much to lose, but I will not be made a fool of in public or intimidated by anyone.

It's funny because I was tested a lot when younger, I was too kind for my own good, that turned into aggression and I nearly went to prison for 2 years (I got a suspended sentence and tag/ankle bracelet for a year) for fighting.

Some people just need a slap, in this generation, everyone talks tough, and we need to normalise low-level physical violence in response to disrespect. You will soon have people acting right.

I've spoken about this before and I'm aware most of the forum disagrees with me on this. I've even had women argue with me when they are barged into or pushed when I'm with them, I can't allow things like that to go unchecked for my own mental health.
This.
 

Epicwinguy

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Everyone is competition for something. Most other guys want what you want regarding women.
 

Hamurabimbi

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How do you deal with other dudes who see you as a threat or competitor?

There is something in me that I'm worried about other men (who are jealous or see me as a threat or competition). Most guys they are okay but some are really nasty.

What are your experiences? When would you try to befriend the guy (even he shows disrespect towards you) versus ignoring him completely?
I can’t relate. most men tend to be nice & friendly or indifferent.
 

Pierce Manhammer

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Well the easiest way to keep the peace - especially if you go out with a hot woman on your arm is to be jacked.

Look fierce, look like the ex-Army Ranger, the guy that’ll tear your throat out if you look at him sideways.

I’m 5’10” but I cultivate that look, and am in outstanding muscular shape for my age. I simply don’t get fncked with.

The look on my face tends to say it all. I’ve been told by gals that I look scary-hot like I’m dangerous, then to discover I’m sweet and kind ;-) which I am.

Anyway I’ve had much bigger guys try to AMOG me in front of my gal before - once the interaction starts they decide I’m not worth the trouble - mostly because they know I’ll fnck them up even if I lose.

Be sprung, look dangerous.
 

2Rocky

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This is like asking if you should pack a pistol or bear spray when you go in the woods.

You need to be aware of your surroundings and don't aggravate the local wildlife. Develop your social circle so that you are a known entity. "Dude, Rocky is a cool guy. People like him."

You sure as hell don't walk in a new place and shout "Yo where da bishes?"

No, you get there early enough to talk to a few of the guys watching the game on the TV because they are getting away from their girlfriends and they will introduce you when new folks roll in...

You gotta get the feel of a place no matter if you are 5'6" or 6'4 and jacked. it is a matter of social skills...
 

Pierce Manhammer

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Go to a boxing gym and learn how to throw em, the hell with lifting weights.
I do what works for me, you should do what works for you bro. My ground game is good I’m by no means a meat head.
 

Murk

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Go to a boxing gym and learn how to throw em, the hell with lifting weights.
I already advised a guy who pm’ed me to join a boxing gym.

Lifting weights is important to avoid the hostility even transpiring. I’m 6’2 and when I packed on muscle I noticed a huge difference in interactions (or lack thereof) from men in public.

I don’t really advise learning to box to start fights with people, it’s not necessary (you can learn to punch at home with pads/heavy bag and YouTube vids) and you can really hurt someone.
 
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