Help Interpret This Txt Message

[Jmac]

Ok so this girl had been really wanting to chill with me for a while now. So I ran out of excuses and said hey why not, plus I was promised a kiss.

The other night we were in the car making out. It was ok I guess but for some reason I really didnt feel into it and I sensed she didn't either. Made out some more, talked a lil then she drove me back.

I decide to text her the next day and it goes exactly like this...

Me: Hey
Her: Hey! Whats up?
Me: Nm just chillin, u?
Her: Im at the mall with my sis... taking her shopping
Me: manter mall?
Her: Yup
Me: Oh being a good sister huh
Her: Yuppp. She's going to Florida and I'm not going to see her before I go back to school.
Me: I see. Brb
Her: Ok

Come back 30 mins later..

Me: Back
Her: Yay
Me: Gotta do mad **** smh
Me: Last night was nice btw
Her: Haha im glad you had fun
Me: Yea.. did u?
Her: Yeah. It was cool.
Me: Cool. We should do it again sometime
Her: I'll have to squeeze you into my busy schedule again.
Me: Right...
Her: Im sorry I workout too much
Me: All good. We really dont have to
Her: Nooo Im not saying that. I just have to be already doing something and I'll just stop by.
Me: Iight, we'll see then.
Her: Okay
The End (Sorry its a bit long)

What do you guys think?

 

[SeymourCake]

Why did you text her "brb"?

Anyways, it sounds like she's waiting for more options to fill up her "busy schedule". The only way you can chill with her again is if she doesn't have much going on because a true Don Juan/Alpha Male would be on top of her "to do list" on her schedule.

 

[Jmac]

Why did you text her "brb"?

Anyways, it sounds like she's waiting for more options to fill up her "busy schedule". The only way you can chill with her again is if she doesn't have much going on because a true Don Juan/Alpha Male would be on top of her "to do list" on her schedule.

Cuz I was actually doing work at the time so I couldn't text.

Yea I figured that and now im assuming she's trying to push me to the side or something. Next time she txts me to hang out im going to decline, good move?

 

[Iceberg]

Cuz I was actually doing work at the time so I couldn't text.

Yeah, but it's texting. So why not just stop responding when you're busy, and then respond again when you're free. Ah whatever....that's just a side issue.

I just hate seeing guys getting into these boring "So, what ya doin?" text conversations. Text with purpose and then get off the phone.

Yea I figured that and now im assuming she's trying to push me to the side or something. Next time she txts me to hang out im going to decline, good move?

It sounded like she was joking....until you made it serious. No one says "I'll have to squeeze you into my busy schedule again" with a straight face.

For most guys, that's the point when you say something like "Wait a minute. I thought I was squeezing you into MY schedule."

Anyway, it just sounds like you're unfamiliar with the concept of humor. Or maybe you needed her to send that text with a smiley face or something. I don't know.

 

[Jmac]

Yeah, but it's texting. So why not just stop responding when you're busy, and then respond again when you're free. Ah whatever....that's just a side issue.

I just hate seeing guys getting into these boring "So, what ya doin?" text conversations. Text with purpose and then get off the phone.



It sounded like she was joking....until you made it serious. No one says "I'll have to squeeze you into my busy schedule again" with a straight face.

For most guys, that's the point when you say something like "Wait a minute. I thought I was squeezing you into MY schedule."

Anyway, it just sounds like you're unfamiliar with the concept of humor. Or maybe you needed her to send that text with a smiley face or something. I don't know.

Thats true, I texted her to hang out again shouldn't have beat around the bush.


Lol it was probably a joke but at the same time she is a D1 athlete so she actually does have somewhat of a busy schedule. I was just thinking too much that she may have been using this as an excuse. Another mistake...
I felt a built guilty about what happened that night.

 

[Upside]

I just hate seeing guys getting into these boring "So, what ya doin?" text conversations. Text with purpose and then get off the phone.

Okay, then what if the girl is initiating these "what are you doing/how are you?" all the time. Not to derail the topic, but sometimes I get into these predicaments where the chick will always text about fluff everyday. If you ignore it they will get upset thinking you don't like them (if you ignore them too much, not once in a while). If you respond, it leads to an unproductive and banal back and forth. If you go for the c & f, you'll eventually run out of material or positive responses. Right now I have a girl texting me everyday "how are you" at around the same time and I just want to throw the phone at her.

 

[DonJuanabe]

"Me: Last night was nice btw
Her: Haha im glad you had fun
Me: Yea.. did u?
Her: Yeah. It was cool.
Me: Cool. We should do it again sometime"

That should never have occurred. Last night was fun? WTF? Do not text her that she should be telling you that shyt. You came across as weak and needy. She can sense she is in control; you gave her the leash and said I'm your dog, walk me. Go no contact and let her ask you when she can next take you for a walk. Then get your balls back in your sack.

 

[marmel75]

You should have offered to have her come over after a workout when she was "in the area" and you could give her a nice massage to help her sore muscles. Say something like "I give the best massages, but you have to promise to keep your clothes on..."

You all know what happens once the massaging starts...you get to start in one area then quickly move to much better areas... :>

Girls love massages, at least if she has any plans to fuk you she would...

 

[Jmac]

"Me: Last night was nice btw
Her: Haha im glad you had fun
Me: Yea.. did u?
Her: Yeah. It was cool.
Me: Cool. We should do it again sometime"

That should never have occurred. Last night was fun? WTF? Do not text her that she should be telling you that shyt. You came across as weak and needy. She can sense she is in control; you gave her the leash and said I'm your dog, walk me. Go no contact and let her ask you when she can next take you for a walk. Then get your balls back in your sack.

I figured this out the hard way... I should have trusted my instincts. Im not gunna contact her at all until she contacts me and then Ill see if we can hang out. Ive definitely lost it. Last year I was a lil ****y (more like very self confident) and some people told me that so I changed, now Im really becoming a ***** and I hate it. I need to trust my instincts

You should have offered to have her come over after a workout when she was "in the area" and you could give her a nice massage to help her sore muscles. Say something like "I give the best massages, but you have to promise to keep your clothes on..."

You all know what happens once the massaging starts...you get to start in one area then quickly move to much better areas... :>

Girls love massages, at least if she has any plans to fuk you she would...

Yea another good idea, but of course I was being AFCish and didn't think of it. Theres gunna be another time and I will redeem myself.

 

[Jmac]

Is there a way to recover from this?

 

[flashpoint]

Is there a way to recover from this?

the ball is in her court. chances are the more you are trying to fix this the more you ruin it. just forget about it and dont do it again. and try to become more honest about what you feel and think etc.

I mean the makeout sucked. you know it, she knows it. denying this leads to this:
"Me: Last night was nice btw
Her: Haha im glad you had fun"
and that is almost embarrassing. so avoid that in the future. I'd rather tease her about being a sucker at kissing or something like that (never a mistake to put the blame on her ). or you just wanted to say that you enjoyed being with her and want to see her again. I'd rather say that before trying to spin reality.

So stick to NC until she contacts you again. then keep it light. no pressure. if she comes up with some plans to seeing each other, fine if not I'd say i have to work now and i' ll call her later. then dont. that should get her back into chasing mode.

at least this is what i would do. no guarantees.

 

[Jmac]

Thats like the worst part to swallow is how she was all on me chasing me. I messed up now she has control for no reason. Now I have to actually wait to see if we can hang out again, I feel like a bit ch. I cant make the same mistake twice. But heres some of what happened while we hung out.

I got in the car, talked for a lil, she asked me where do you want to drive to? I said idk wherever. So we drove to this spot close by. We made out a bit in the front, but I cut it short and said lets move to the back this is mad uncomfortable.

We got to the back and she came on my lap started making out for good while then stopped and got off. I said "eh that was alright" (because she told me she was a great kisser) so she said "alright?? Wow ok" & then I said "lol yea it was pretty good, round 2?"


She smiled and said " yea but u have to come to my side" & I was like nah u come over here. We argued it for a lil and she said "when ur having sex do u like the girl on top" and I said "yea" *thought about it* then I said "hold on thats different". 8 asked "you like being on top?" She says "no, I like being under" & "I was like oh, so im guessing ur not a virgin" she says "no" & I just said "hmm never thought.."

Then she says "yea alot of ppl think im innocent" & im like "I would have never guessed"
Fastforward...

She came on my lap again made out more talked a lil. Then she asked "where do I live". I told her and suggested we go to my house and chill sometime and I got and "yea ill stop by"

She started poking at my abs and was like "hmm" & I said "what".. "just checking if u had a six pack".. "yea of course I do" *felt on her stomach" talked a lil bit. I told her I was getting tired and she said she was too. Made out again. Then she tells me her parents need her to be home by 11:30.

After time was almost done she was like " we have one more minute" & I said "hey u can give me a massage"... "no.." I laughed and just looked away.

She dropped me off, goodnight kiss. That was that.


What you guys think?

 

[SoSuave666]

Thats like the worst part to swallow is how she was all on me chasing me. I messed up now she has control for no reason. Now I have to actually wait to see if we can hang out again, I feel like a bit ch. I cant make the same mistake twice. But heres some of what happened while we hung out.

I got in the car, talked for a lil, she asked me where do you want to drive to? I said idk wherever. So we drove to this spot close by. We made out a bit in the front, but I cut it short and said lets move to the back this is mad uncomfortable.

We got to the back and she came on my lap started making out for good while then stopped and got off. I said "eh that was alright" (because she told me she was a great kisser) so she said "alright?? Wow ok" & then I said "lol yea it was pretty good, round 2?"


She smiled and said " yea but u have to come to my side" & I was like nah u come over here. We argued it for a lil and she said "when ur having sex do u like the girl on top" and I said "yea" *thought about it* then I said "hold on thats different". 8 asked "you like being on top?" She says "no, I like being under" & "I was like oh, so im guessing ur not a virgin" she says "no" & I just said "hmm never thought.."

Then she says "yea alot of ppl think im innocent" & im like "I would have never guessed"
Fastforward...

She came on my lap again made out more talked a lil. Then she asked "where do I live". I told her and suggested we go to my house and chill sometime and I got and "yea ill stop by"

She started poking at my abs and was like "hmm" & I said "what".. "just checking if u had a six pack".. "yea of course I do" *felt on her stomach" talked a lil bit. I told her I was getting tired and she said she was too. Made out again. Then she tells me her parents need her to be home by 11:30.

After time was almost done she was like " we have one more minute" & I said "hey u can give me a massage"... "no.." I laughed and just looked away.

She dropped me off, goodnight kiss. That was that.


What you guys think?

This girl was prime while you were in the car. This girl also overtly told you she isn't "innocent." A.) Could be a red flag, especially so early on. B.) If you're in a stage in your life where you believe that 20-something year olds aren't out having secks and are virgins, you got a lot of growing up to do.

As for texting, Iceberg is right you can't have conversations with these girls. You end up trying to banter too much back and forth and wind up just sounding like a couple of girlscouts bickering at each other about who sold more cookies. Then you talk yourself into a situation where no one wants to be the one to initiate a meetup because they will "lose the upper hand."

You should always just open up with a simple text, say something witty, then get out by asking to meetup. Nothing more or you ruin your mystery and become her little pet. It's amazing these days how one little mistake with a girl you're trying to date can flip the whole script. Why add texting to the mix, especially if you aren't good at it.

 

[Jmac]

This girl was prime while you were in the car. This girl also overtly told you she isn't "innocent." A.) Could be a red flag, especially so early on. B.) If you're in a stage in your life where you believe that 20-something year olds aren't out having secks and are virgins, you got a lot of growing up to do.

As for texting, Iceberg is right you can't have conversations with these girls. You end up trying to banter too much back and forth and wind up just sounding like a couple of girlscouts bickering at each other about who sold more cookies. Then you talk yourself into a situation where no one wants to be the one to initiate a meetup because they will "lose the upper hand."

You should always just open up with a simple text, say something witty, then get out by asking to meetup. Nothing more or you ruin your mystery and become her little pet. It's amazing these days how one little mistake with a girl you're trying to date can flip the whole script. Why add texting to the mix, especially if you aren't good at it.

She recently turned 19. I suspect all girls are having secks but I just felt like seeming surprised.
The texting was definately a bad idea, at the time I was thinking dont even contact her but instead of listening to my instincts I chose the AFC way and ended up txting her. Didnt work well now I gotta prove my worth.

As for this whole situation, I think I can reverse it. Make her chase me again.

We both follow each other on twitter and just by me talking to other girls might just make her jealous.

 

[TRSX]

Bee Bop Bee Bop. Initiating TRSX text conversion beta 1.0a.....

SEQUENCE INITIATED.

Me: Hey
Hi, I have nothing to do so im bothering you.
Her: Hey! Whats up?
Hey, makeout guy, this is my nice response back, im still kind of interested.
Me: Nm just chillin, u?
I have no good responses just wanted to chat.
Her: Im at the mall with my sis... taking her shopping
Please say something interesting..
Me: manter mall?
Irrelevant Questions are fun! But she'll bite!
Her: Yup
Yup
Me: Oh being a good sister huh
See, I can carry this convo a little bit, check out my witty self!
Her: Yuppp. She's going to Florida and I'm not going to see her before I go back to school.
Okay at least he can make a little bit of a jab, starting to like again..
Me: I see. Brb
I see, listen I need to put my phone down, but dont run off. LOL because that would be CRAZY LOL.
Her: Ok
The fvck?

Come back 30 mins later..

Me: Back
Hey, did you go anywhere?
Her: Yay
Oh god, how do I get rid of this
Me: Gotta do mad **** smh
Me: Last night was nice btw
There are not many girls in my life right now that I can maul with my tongue. My mom still kisses me goodnight and tucks me in though, so I guess if you count that.. Oh man, I wish you were here so I could kiss you and hold you. XOXOXOXOXO.
Her: Haha im glad you had fun
Yeah... this guy is not a challenge.
Me: Yea.. did u?
I need to make sure she had as much as fun as I did.. LOL because if she didn't that would be CRAZY LOL.
Her: Yeah. It was cool.
Yeah, no.
Me: Cool. We should do it again sometime
She said yeah! SHE REALLY LIKES ME. Starting scrapbook from this moment.
Her: I'll have to squeeze you into my busy schedule again.
I wont have time because an alpha male is going to be penetrating my pvssy by tomorrow.
Me: Right...
Right...
Her: Im sorry I workout too much
I'm sorry, I need a huge dong, not a needy puppy.
Me: All good. We really dont have to
Its cool, I'm going to switch to bad ass now and act like you're whatever with my weak response.
Her: Nooo Im not saying that. I just have to be already doing something and I'll just stop by.
You're a NICE guy and I don't want you to start crying, stalking, or doing anything beta towards me. Hope you don't find the pictures of me sucking your cute friends c0ck later LOLTTYL
Me: Iight, we'll see then.
Yeah, she wants me.
Her: Okay
Yeah, please go away.

You went total beta, not sure if you can recover from this one. Just learn from your mistakes and move on. Remember, a girl is NEVER a priority - she needs to feel like she has to earn your time and respect.

Goodluck my friend

 

[Jmac]

Bee Bop Bee Bop. Initiating TRSX text conversion beta 1.0a.....

SEQUENCE INITIATED.



You went total beta, not sure if you can recover from this one. Just learn from your mistakes and move on. Remember, a girl is NEVER a priority - she needs to feel like she has to earn your time and respect.

Goodluck my friend

This is the sad truth. What makes it worse is that I realized I was being beta too late. Im going NC but she follows me on twitter. What should I do about that?

 

[Purefilth]

get rid of twitter! personally i think its pointless anyway a bunck of needy bvtches whining about their lives, like anyone really gives a fvck anyway?
Twitter sucks, ditch it

 

[Jmac]

get rid of twitter! personally i think its pointless anyway a bunck of needy bvtches whining about their lives, like anyone really gives a fvck anyway?
Twitter sucks, ditch it

I felt this way at first until I got addicted to using it. Plus its filled with hoes, thats gunna be hard to pass up lol. Actually hooked up with a few thru twitter alone.

 

[Skalioppe]

You're way too keen and your texting has no purpose, it comes across as needy, Omega male-like and if I'm honest, lame as fvck. Always text with a purpose, to secure situations (dates, get her to do something for you, escalation into sexting, arrange s3xy times etc.). If I'm honest, it sounds like you're slipping into her friend zone at an alarming rate.

Here's how you should've play it (after waiting a day or so, to build her longing and make her feel like you have options and are busy doing other things).

You : Hey <her name>! How are you this sunny day, chilling I hope? The other night was a laugh, so let's hook up again, how's 8pm Thursday looking for you? I hope you realise I'm risking my job here....

Understand the formula for a good text, let me break that down for you....
Hey <her name>! = Addressing her properly (women like that), with overtones of positive energy all thanks to the "!"
How are you this sunny day, chilling I hope? = Being considerate (women are emotional spazzos) / a question which encourages her to answer
The other night was a laugh = Congruence, you shared a good time
so let's hook up again, how's 8pm, Thursday looking for you? = Alpha confidence as YOU'RE taking control, framing, having purpose, women fvcking love that sh1t.
I hope you realise I'm risking my job here.... = Something mysterious (women are nosey b1tches) / dangerous (Alpha) / she won't be entirely sure what you meant but will probably think it's about her and feel special, but will want to validate that and also know what you meant.

From my experience, she'll have probably replied like this:
Her : Hey! Yeah, lovely day, I'm shopping with my sis at the mall. 8pm sounds good, I'll pick you up! What did you mean lose your job?.. x

If she couldn't make it Thursday, you'd've then chucked her another couple of options, but if she couldn't do them you'd remain gracious and unaffected then NC her arse until she re-contacted.

 

[Jmac]

You're way too keen and your texting has no purpose, it comes across as needy, Omega male-like and if I'm honest, lame as fvck. Always text with a purpose, to secure situations (dates, get her to do something for you, escalation into sexting, arrange s3xy times etc.). If I'm honest, it sounds like you're slipping into her friend zone at an alarming rate.

Here's how you should've play it (after waiting a day or so, to build her longing and make her feel like you have options and are busy doing other things).

You : Hey <her name>! How are you this sunny day, chilling I hope? The other night was a laugh, so let's hook up again, how's 8pm Thursday looking for you? I hope you realise I'm risking my job here....

Understand the formula for a good text, let me break that down for you....
Hey <her name>! = Addressing her properly (women like that), with overtones of positive energy all thanks to the "!"
How are you this sunny day, chilling I hope? = Being considerate (women are emotional spazzos) / a question which encourages her to answer
The other night was a laugh = Congruence, you shared a good time
so let's hook up again, how's 8pm, Thursday looking for you? = Alpha confidence as YOU'RE taking control, framing, having purpose, women fvcking love that sh1t.
I hope you realise I'm risking my job here.... = Something mysterious (women are nosey b1tches) / dangerous (Alpha) / she won't be entirely sure what you meant but will probably think it's about her and feel special, but will want to validate that and also know what you meant.

From my experience, she'll have probably replied like this:
Her : Hey! Yeah, lovely day, I'm shopping with my sis at the mall. 8pm sounds good, I'll pick you up! What did you mean lose your job?.. x

If she couldn't make it Thursday, you'd've then chucked her another couple of options, but if she couldn't do them you'd remain gracious and unaffected then NC her arse until she re-contacted.

Ok I know what I shouldve done now. The question is, what do I do after messing up like that?