Having problems...

[nightcrawler]

..and need advice on my next move. I really don't know where to turn to and I'm feeling stressed.

I am a 20 year old college student pursuing a degree in computer science. I am roughly a couple or three semesters away from becoming a junior. The problem I am having is with money.

Basically, I can't afford to fail a class or retake a class. Due to me being an international student I simply can't afford it! It's inevitable that I fail a course I am taking due to a tough teacher and his tests. So basically my college career is over. I also cannot take a student loan, lest have a decent job because I am not a US citizen.

My relationship with my step dad (my provider for school) is in the verge of ending with a fist fight. With my upcoming failure, my relationship with him will get worse and I'm pretty sure it will force me out of the house. As of now all the guy does is throw in my face the Chemistry class I failed last semester, my "ineptiveness", and reminds me what a failure I am every chance he has. Basically put, he treats me like **** and I have to put up with it due to my situation.

Without a college opportunity, no means of getting a decent job, and situation at home I don't know what the **** to do. I think about this **** all day and I can't sleep well, can't concentrate, and I'm constantly worried.

 

[Ken785]

where are you from? why not just go home and pursue a degree there?? it would be much cheaper...trust me, also it will be a lot less stressful too, you dont want to be somewhere you know you cant afford and starve yourself...

and id whoop your stepdad's a$s if i were u...i dont have one but cant imagine having one neither... - KeN

 

[nightcrawler]

where are you from? why not just go home and pursue a degree there?? it would be much cheaper...trust me, also it will be a lot less stressful too, you dont want to be somewhere you know you cant afford and starve yourself...

and id whoop your stepdad's a$s if i were u...i dont have one but cant imagine having one neither... - KeN

The situation is not that black and white.

There is no money to be made back in a latin american country, and for a graduate to get a job there is almost impossible.

My hopes are that by the time I finish school I'm a citizen (which I will be by the looks of it) but with this turn of events finishing school won't happen.

My step dad is the one that provided for me at the moment. If I kick his ass I'll end up in the streets.

I've asked myself often if I'm right or he is..I mean aren't fathers supposed to provide for their kids anyways? all my father does is rub the bills on my face, asks when I will gtfo of the house and makes my life miserable.

Then again...is he really supposed to provide for me? maybe he's right and I should get out of his house and make my own life.

If I were a citizen of the US at the moment I'd gtfo of here, get my student loan, and get that damn degree. But my situation relies on him so much that I can't do it.

 

[Ken785]

worst comes to worst you can always get certified TESOL and teach english overseas and see the world...i think i might do that...right fuzz? *High Five

 

[Bible_Belt]

At the risk of sounding like a man-wh0re, if I were you, I would go sweet talk some naive American girl into marrying me. I am guessing you are Catholic, or at least your family is? If you want to find a wife, the youth groups at the biggest churches you can find are full of silly awkward girls who think they are waiting to be swept off their feet. If you talk a good game, I bet you could have a wife within a month or two. No sh!t. Think about it. I know it's not a perfect solution, but if you are really facing deportation, then you are out of options. I also realize that it is ironic to recommend rushing into marriage with a stranger on this forum, but there is also a thing called divorce, too, and they don't take away the Green Card if you divorce after it arrives. This plan is using your skills with women to get what you want out of life, which is at least dj in that respect. Maybe you're wh0ring yourself out, but everyone has a price, and the payoff you get - the chance to live, work, and study here in the US - is a big opportunity.

 

[KontrollerX]

"I've asked myself often if I'm right or he is..I mean aren't fathers supposed to provide for their kids anyways? all my father does is rub the bills on my face, asks when I will gtfo of the house and makes my life miserable.

Then again...is he really supposed to provide for me? maybe he's right and I should get out of his house and make my own life."

This scumbag should be helping you not putting extra pressure on you that doesn't help you any.

Its a horrible situation you are in for sure but people like him generally get what they deserve later in life.

You will be succesful one day I believe and when he needs help when he gets old or whenever you won't be there for him because he wasn't there for you and showed you how he deserves to be treated by his treating you like garbage.

 

[~attrACTION~]

Everyone else has given pretty good advice. I have a few questions/comments.

First off, where are you currently residing in the US? You mentioned getting a job...have you tried, and why have you not been able to find one?

I know working and doing school at the same time is not easy, but it's definitely manageable. I'm not Computer Science, but I do a lot of freelance web work (which I assume most Comp Sci majors have a general understanding and skill in HTML and other languages, as I used to study Comp Sci at one point). I think if you look on Craigslist, eLance, or ScriptLance, etc. sites, you can easily find side jobs for some cash.

While I understand that you may have a tough teacher, failing a class is not really the teacher's fault. It's always easier to place the blame on someone other than yourself. In order to really solve the problem, though, you have to figure out where YOU went wrong.

If you try those things and still can't figure out to make any money, I have 2 suggestions.

1) You may want to try selling things on eBay. I wrote a free guide on How to Profit on eBay, and you can ask me any questions you may have.

2) Lastly, I am willing to personally help you with your education. Yes, I know I don't know you, but your situations seems genuine. We can work out some sort of repayment plan, as I am sure you will be successful in the future. If you are interested, PM me to let me know. I can loan you $5000-$10000USD, depending on the terms of our agreement.

P.S. You can also try www.prosper.com - it's a website that allows people to loan money to each other. It's almost like p2p loaning, online. A similar site for foreigners abroad is called http://kiva.org/ Check them both out.

 

[Bible_Belt]

lest have a decent job

My ex-wife was an International student. afaik, they can only work student-worker on-campus jobs that don't pay much. Any other employment would be illegal.

 

[~attrACTION~]

lest have a decent job

My ex-wife was an International student. afaik, they can only work student-worker on-campus jobs that don't pay much. Any other employment would be illegal.

True, but who's going to find out if you're just making a website/project for someone and getting paid in cash? Or if you're doing jobs that involve cash transactions?

I also don't think you have to be a US citizen to get a PayPal account. There's plenty of ways to make money other than the 'traditional' types of jobs...especially if you have the knowledge of a Comp Sci major.

 

[Last Man Standing]

Why are you failing in school?

 

[Bible_Belt]

True, but who's going to find out if you're just making a website/project for someone and getting paid in cash? Or if you're doing jobs that involve cash transactions?

True, although illegal, the chance of getting caught is slim. The bigger problem is his visa going out of status. If he overstays his welcome, then the next time he gets stopped by a police officer for something like a traffic stop, he'll go to INS jail and then get deported. Sometimes it takes only weeks to get caught, sometimes decades, but it sucks either way.

 

[nightcrawler]

Thanks for the replies guys...my situation has me stressed because I'm in a situation where I simply have nothing to fall back on.
opportunity.[/QUOTE]

Bible Belt:
I have thought of this as my only way out. I'm also considering in asking some of my family's friends so that they could marry me. Thing is that we somebody that went through that experience and it ended pretty bad.

Still, I'm gonna have a talk with the parents about my next move. If it comes down to this then it will have to be that.

Attraction:
Thanks for the offer. Also the reason that I failed the class was because I started on the wrong foot (along with the other 23 students that left the course already....) I put lots of effort to pass that first test and didn't even make a 50% on it. I feel that I simply cannot pass the course having only 2 other tests to rely on.

I'm sure they will stop paying for the education. The thing that bothers me is the job situation.

Last Man standing:
The first time I failed 1 class was because I was fresh out of high school and wasn't used to the study overload.

A year later I failed 2 classes because I moved in with my grandma for awhile and I will admit I slacked off too much.

And here I am....only needing 2 more maths and 2 more physics courses to get an AA degree.

I'm gonna talk to my parents about this. I'm sure my studies will be done for. The thing that bothers me the most is that I cannot be independent due to my situation (unless I get a job in construction, farming, etc...but that really wasn't my goal in life)..but if it comes down to it I'll have to do it. I don't think I can reside with my dad much longer and frankly I'm tired of his attitude toward me. I've been taking his attitude and insults for 10 years now...I'm tired of it.