Has boyfriend, is interested in me, but rejected my advances

[Sofomore]

Summary: Girl is way into me, just doesn't want to be labeled a slvt for hooking up with me while still in a relationship. Do I try again in a week or so, or do I break contact for good?

Met a sexy girl a week ago (lives down the street). She flirts like crazy with me and talks to me about what she likes to do in bed etc. Lots of big IOIs but she is at the end of her 4 year relationship at 20 years old.

Now last night she comes over to my house with her friends and we playing drinking games. We swap stories and everyone is having a great time, lots of touching. We then head to a party where I flirt with a bunch of different girls. I was the life of the party.

Fast forward, I tell her I am heading out but she can tag along if she wants. She is down, and we start walking back. She brings up all of this sexual stuff, about how she loves handcuffs and watching porn. Now I am thinking she wants my nuts. I make her stop, pull her closer and go for the kill.

Typical rejection: :nono: "You know I have a boyfriend"

I guess here is where my frame of mind shifts and my AFC tendencies came out. I started talking to her about how i just got out of a relationship and she explains that she wants out but doesnt know how to end it. Really stupid of me bringing it up. We talk about why its hard for people to leave, and that its a fear of putting yourself out there.

I tell her to let me know when she's single. She agrees and she heads inside.

Now I am looking for advice on this situation.

Should I continue pressing, acting like she doesn't have a boyfriend? Or should I back off and go with no contact?

 

[iwanttofight]

Dude back off bro, trust me on this one. Im not into sloppy seconds if you know what I mean, and Im sure your not either. You don't want to bang this chick when she banged her boyfriend the night before. You already told her that when she's single come find me, you left the ball in her court, which was smart, now its up to her to play.

 

[perseverance]

she explains that she wants out but doesnt know how to end it.

I can't believe you brought that, hook, line and sinker. If a girl wants out of a relationship, she'll find a way out.

She either wanted attention from you (which she got) or she does want you, or maybe she wanted both. You'll probably have sex with her at some point, develop feelings, try and get with her, she'll either reject you and go back to the boyfriend, or she'll break up with him, run to you, only to go back to her boyfriend and confess everything.

My advice would be to walk away, recently a young man in my town shot his girlfriend and the man she was sleeping with. You never know what you're getting yourself into in these situations, so I'd stay away. If she becomes single then it's a different matter entirely.

 

[Sofomore]

Good points. I am cringing just thinking about it now. Just deleted her number so I don't even bother.

 

[Mike32ct]

I can't believe you brought that, hook, line and sinker. If a girl wants out of a relationship, she'll find a way out.

She either wanted attention from you (which she got) or she does want you, or maybe she wanted both. You'll probably have sex with her at some point, develop feelings, try and get with her, she'll either reject you and go back to the boyfriend, or she'll break up with him, run to you, only to go back to her boyfriend and confess everything.

My advice would be to walk away, recently a young man in my town shot his girlfriend and the man she was sleeping with. You never know what you're getting yourself into in these situations, so I'd stay away. If she becomes single then it's a different matter entirely.

^This.

The "I'm going to break up with my man" is the oldest lie in the book. Never believe that one. Plus, you avoid a lot of drama by just walking away.

 

[backbreaker]

if a girl is "interested in you" but rejecting your advances, she isn't interested in you as much as she is interested in the attention you give her. there is a difference


actions, not words. As rollo has said before, a woman will climb past a barb wire fence while taking enemy fire, then go solid snake when she gets in the building up to your room to **** you if she likes you enough.

 

[Marvin Gaye]

As rollo has said before, a woman will climb past a barb wire fence while taking enemy fire, then go solid snake when she gets in the building up to your room to **** you if she likes you enough.

whooooo my ribs will hurt for a while after laughing at this.

 

[floydb25]

if a girl is "interested in you" but rejecting your advances, she isn't interested in you as much as she is interested in the attention you give her. there is a difference


actions, not words. As rollo has said before, a woman will climb past a barb wire fence while taking enemy fire, then go solid snake when she gets in the building up to your room to **** you if she likes you enough.

Everything this man says is true. Unfortunately, a lot of guys try to prove they're better than the boyfriend, try to pursuade her into leaving, etc. Bad idea.

 

[Die Hard]

Never mind... I posted a question but already know the answer.

 

[nismo-4]

This thread title is an oxymoron. Open and shut case here.

A woman with a boyfriend and rejects your advances is not interested in you. If she were, she wouldn't reject you. Actions speak louder than words. See Backbreaker's post.

Just walk away. Don't try to prove you're better than her bf. The fact is that women choose just how far you'll get with them from the start. She decided to diktease you. Damn glass ceilings.

Alas, your princess is in another castle.

Case closed.

 

[ArcBound]

Your response to "You know I have a boyfriend" was the wrong one.

Instead of talking about mundane sh!t about relationships on a whole, and "feelings" and talking about why she can't leave her boyfriend;

You should have pushed. Should have said he'll never know. Should have said he isn't there. Or even just ignored that statement completely.

A girl who is all touchy feely with you, goes to your house with her friends (WITHOUT her boyfriend), plays DRINKING GAMES with you, and talks about SEX with you is about all the signals you can get without her signing a statement she wants your dvck.

On a side note never try to kiss while walking with the girl outside it never works IMO(especially if she has a boyfriend and is afraid of her friends seeing), you should have invited her over to your place with some pretense or tried to go to hers and then you could have done whatever you wanted with her.

 

[Aaron B]

power play

if she earns some of your time and attention in the future, reward her with it

otherwise, don't

she's trying to have her cake and eat it too

 

[Sofomore]

Lots of interesting points. I can tell she definitely likes the attention, big case of having the cake and eating it too.

I am going to ignore her for now/ forget about it.

 

[Sofomore]

power play

if she earns some of your time and attention in the future, reward her with it

otherwise, don't

she's trying to have her cake and eat it too

What do you mean by rewarding her?