Broadband
Don Juan
This report is horribly outdated however I am just now browsing these forums again and thought I'd post. There isn't much insight beyond the tried and true concept of ****y funny and shooting at your hip. Hopefully this will engage some of you to expand your comfort zones.
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Every May there is a Portland Rose Festival which consists of excited children along with their families sitting along miles of city block watching an evening parade. This has been tradition for years and I just so happened to find my inner child and come down to the festival.
The look of astonishment on the crowd's face was amusing had we paid any attention. Instead my friend and I were passing around a 1 liter of vodka lemonaid and cracking jokes that the hot girls performing were likely jailbait which was extremely depressing to my 35 year old friend. The festival was like any other with a beginning and an end and fortunately for us we were reaching the end. You see the the mixture of alcohol and sitting on cold pavement do not make great friends and we were antsy to head into a welcoming pub with even more welcoming beers.
As we finally headed towards Kel's I noticed something in a doorway of a building and like a cat just had to see what it was. What i found was a discarded nay abandoned piece of perfectly good cardboard that was once a sign owned and even operated by a begger. It was ripped in such a way that it barely resembled a shape and scribbled on it was the phrase, "I bet you a dollar you'll read this sign." Unable to hide my heritage as a member of the 5 finger family I just had to swipe it and make it my own. As soon as my friends saw me proudly displaying it for the world to see they equated the action to me burning in hell for all eternity. Since I was damned I might as well enjoy the fruits of my labor.
As we walked on I proudly displayed my sign with the response of laughter by many. I guess they haven't seen many 6'9" clean shaven and well dressed bums, but I made it my mission to distort their reality or atleast entertain them. Funny enough by the time we made it to the bar I had netted over $3 thanks to this sign from unsuspecting bystandards including an elderly couple.
To the dismay of my friends instead of throwing the sign in the trash I insisted on bringing it with me even though I had no clue where it had been.
Well with all the attention I had been getting with this little piece of flair I decided to lay it on even thicker. I started walking up to tables standing behind someone conspiciously and remaining completely silent while they read it. As soon as they laughed I knew they read it and then promptly demanded they pay me for losing the bet. This was an amazing opener as it was ****y, funny and everyone at the table wanted....nay, NEEDED to hear the story behind how I acquired this.
By the end of the evening I walked away with several numbers and more importantly I gave everyone a good laugh.
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I haven't tried this approach since as the opportunity to acquire another sign hasn't presented itself. Here is an idea for some of you to try. The next time you walk by a bum with a particulary funny or entertaining sign begging for money, offer to barter. Pay him a few dollars for his sign and then carry it with you and see the laughs you get. You can also tell this story when people ask you how you got it.
"I was walking downtown and this homeless man started bugging me for money. I told him I didn't have anything but he was admiate and then offered me a trade. $5 for his sign. Now since I believe that you should get rewarded for your work I just couldn't turn away the offer. I mean this could be considered art to someone and now I own a origional print from Harry the Hobo."
I'm sure you could come up with a more creative story.
Hope you all enjoyed!
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Every May there is a Portland Rose Festival which consists of excited children along with their families sitting along miles of city block watching an evening parade. This has been tradition for years and I just so happened to find my inner child and come down to the festival.
The look of astonishment on the crowd's face was amusing had we paid any attention. Instead my friend and I were passing around a 1 liter of vodka lemonaid and cracking jokes that the hot girls performing were likely jailbait which was extremely depressing to my 35 year old friend. The festival was like any other with a beginning and an end and fortunately for us we were reaching the end. You see the the mixture of alcohol and sitting on cold pavement do not make great friends and we were antsy to head into a welcoming pub with even more welcoming beers.
As we finally headed towards Kel's I noticed something in a doorway of a building and like a cat just had to see what it was. What i found was a discarded nay abandoned piece of perfectly good cardboard that was once a sign owned and even operated by a begger. It was ripped in such a way that it barely resembled a shape and scribbled on it was the phrase, "I bet you a dollar you'll read this sign." Unable to hide my heritage as a member of the 5 finger family I just had to swipe it and make it my own. As soon as my friends saw me proudly displaying it for the world to see they equated the action to me burning in hell for all eternity. Since I was damned I might as well enjoy the fruits of my labor.
As we walked on I proudly displayed my sign with the response of laughter by many. I guess they haven't seen many 6'9" clean shaven and well dressed bums, but I made it my mission to distort their reality or atleast entertain them. Funny enough by the time we made it to the bar I had netted over $3 thanks to this sign from unsuspecting bystandards including an elderly couple.
To the dismay of my friends instead of throwing the sign in the trash I insisted on bringing it with me even though I had no clue where it had been.
Well with all the attention I had been getting with this little piece of flair I decided to lay it on even thicker. I started walking up to tables standing behind someone conspiciously and remaining completely silent while they read it. As soon as they laughed I knew they read it and then promptly demanded they pay me for losing the bet. This was an amazing opener as it was ****y, funny and everyone at the table wanted....nay, NEEDED to hear the story behind how I acquired this.
By the end of the evening I walked away with several numbers and more importantly I gave everyone a good laugh.
------
I haven't tried this approach since as the opportunity to acquire another sign hasn't presented itself. Here is an idea for some of you to try. The next time you walk by a bum with a particulary funny or entertaining sign begging for money, offer to barter. Pay him a few dollars for his sign and then carry it with you and see the laughs you get. You can also tell this story when people ask you how you got it.
"I was walking downtown and this homeless man started bugging me for money. I told him I didn't have anything but he was admiate and then offered me a trade. $5 for his sign. Now since I believe that you should get rewarded for your work I just couldn't turn away the offer. I mean this could be considered art to someone and now I own a origional print from Harry the Hobo."
I'm sure you could come up with a more creative story.
Hope you all enjoyed!