Hairy Mary

[Fruitbat]

So, is a man within his rights to expect a woman to trim her “sanctuary”?

Said woman comes from a culture where this is not practiced and seen as unlucky if you trim it!!

She has tried the razor and it gave her spots and skin issues.

I don’t expect p0rn completely shaven, just not completely o-natural.

I find it quite off putting.

I’m considering buying trimmers and doing it myself. She spends half of her life thinking about skin care but seems not to care about looking like a cavewoman.

Just a few notes:

- please don’t skim read to find a chink in the armour to then make some macho ballsy statement about how women fawn at your feet freshly shaven, how you would dump a girl for 1mm over regulation pubic hair etc

- there is no wider comment about the relationship to be made so please don’t start talking about your “frame”

 

[ubercat]

I used to love that pomme expression like a rag man's coat you guys really do filth well

Mate that is a delicate one. I suggest positive reinforcement. I.e. her bits are so wonderful that you want to see them a bit more. Obviously not a discussion more a little ego boosting dirty talk in bed. And she's pretty young. If she hasn't successfully trimmed before she might not know how to do it. maybe buy her a deluxe spa package which includes a bit of lawn maintenance. if it gives her a bit of confidence down there it will be well worth the money. Of course if she does do it you are going to have to go down there and spend some serious time worshipping the goddess you need to give her the best oral of her life

Tread very carefully you don't want to nag. one of the many delightful things about Asian ladies is they generally don't have hangups about sex you don't want to give her one. But they're normally are really into pleasing their man and if you can get her to think it's the normal done thing in England maybe get some other girls to talk to her about it that would go a long way

 

[Billtx49]

Use a lube if you haven’t before. If she asks why the change, tell her your shaft is getting irritated by some excess bush…

 

[ubercat]

@BeExcellent, @AJ84, @sazc this thread could badly do with a woman's perspective.

 

[AJ84]

Sounds like she tried with a razor but didn’t like the result. Maybe a different kind of razor or even a small pair of scissors.

I like Uber’s suggestion of making it more of a playful thing. Maybe as part of foreplay she can let you trim it for her. Maybe she can trim yours too.

 

[fmnoos]

I like this sounds)

 

[sazc]

So, is a man within his rights to expect a woman to trim her “sanctuary”? NO

Said woman comes from a culture where this is not practiced and seen as unlucky if you trim it!!

She has tried the razor and it gave her spots and skin issues.

I don’t expect p0rn completely shaven, just not completely o-natural.

I find it quite off putting.

I’m considering buying trimmers and doing it myself. She spends half of her life thinking about skin care but seems not to care about looking like a cavewoman.

Just a few notes:

- please don’t skim read to find a chink in the armour to then make some macho ballsy statement about how women fawn at your feet freshly shaven, how you would dump a girl for 1mm over regulation pubic hair etc

- there is no wider comment about the relationship to be made so please don’t start talking about your “frame”

Neither sex is within their rights to expect their partner is going to change to perform to their expectations. When you set out to change who a person is, you will fail.

You're dating someone whom has beliefs that her luck will change if she trims. That's going to be difficult to overcome.

You say she's already tried to use a razor and ended up with skin issues. Was the razor brand new or used? It really needs to be brand new, esp if she's going to shave without trimming first. She can always wax or use a depilatory, but that's not going to address the bushiness of the situation if her intent is to clean it up only.

If she's fully against it (which it doesn't sound like she is) there's not much you can do except adjust your expectations, or bail.

 

[BeExcellent]

This is your wife Fruitbat. If you are getting lost in the thicket there are a couple of things I would suggest.

1. Approach this as something that would please you. She has already used a razor down there so she appears willing to consider manicuring the landscape so you (and in return she) is happy.

2. Beard trimmers are your best friend here. Use a #2 guard and do her mound. This will give a neat trimmed look. Remove the guard to trim closer around the outer labia. Be careful. She can learn to trim herself this way. It doesn’t take much time & it keeps things neat.

3. Regular bikini waxing to take care of the sides. If she wears a bikini bottom to the waxing salon they can clean up the sides & top borders very neatly. They can also remove hair from the back door which she isn’t going to be able to groom or remove herself.

Shaving to me is last resort. It can get irritated and the hair tends to ingrow and stubble come in thicker. Hair removal creams are messy and can irritate skin. Waxing may irritate a bit too, but it calms down in a day or so and lasts for a couple of weeks.

In my opinion bush maintenance is as important a part of grooming as nails or skin. It feels sexy to be well groomed in the bikini area.

It isn’t terribly expensive to wax once or twice a month. I like going to the salon to get girly.

See if those suggestions gain traction.

Beard trimmer. 2 guard. That’s your go to.

 

[sazc]

If she's superstitious and believes that trimming is bad luck, suggesting any sort of "trimming" isn't going to go well.

What about suggesting she shave it all off? Technically that's not a "trim"

You married her knowing she was like this. Not sure why you're getting bunchy over it now....?

 

[RickTheToad]

If she's superstitious and believes that trimming is bad luck, suggesting any sort of "trimming" isn't going to go well.

What about suggesting she shave it all off? Technically that's not a "trim"

You married her knowing she was like this. Not sure why you're getting bunchy over it now....?

I've heard of many ladies do a lot of things until they get da ring. Once they secured da ring, things slowly start to change. Remember, men just hope things stay the same, ladies usually hope for things to change. Usually, both are disappointed unless both people can somehow meet in the middle. Usually, the ladies wear masks to make them appear to be like the lady the dude wants her to be (in her head). Once the rose colored glasses come off, the real person appears. I am sure this can happen to dudes to, but I've not dated a dude, so I do not know.

 

[sazc]

I've heard of many ladies do a lot of things until they get da ring. Once they secured da ring, things slowly start to change. Remember, men just hope things stay the same, ladies usually hope for things to change. Usually, both are disappointed unless both people can somehow meet in the middle. Usually, the ladies wear masks to make them appear to be like the lady the dude wants her to be (in her head). Once the rose colored glasses come off, the real person appears. I am sure this can happen to dudes to, but I've not dated a dude, so I do not know.

Yea, idk @Fruitbat, was she a hairy monster before you married her?

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

This is your wife Fruitbat. If you are getting lost in the thicket there are a couple of things I would suggest.

1. Approach this as something that would please you. She has already used a razor down there so she appears willing to consider manicuring the landscape so you (and in return she) is happy.

2. Beard trimmers are your best friend here. Use a #2 guard and do her mound. This will give a neat trimmed look. Remove the guard to trim closer around the outer labia. Be careful. She can learn to trim herself this way. It doesn’t take much time & it keeps things neat.

3. Regular bikini waxing to take care of the sides. If she wears a bikini bottom to the waxing salon they can clean up the sides & top borders very neatly. They can also remove hair from the back door which she isn’t going to be able to groom or remove herself.

Shaving to me is last resort. It can get irritated and the hair tends to ingrow and stubble come in thicker. Hair removal creams are messy and can irritate skin. Waxing may irritate a bit too, but it calms down in a day or so and lasts for a couple of weeks.

In my opinion bush maintenance is as important a part of grooming as nails or skin. It feels sexy to be well groomed in the bikini area.

It isn’t terribly expensive to wax once or twice a month. I like going to the salon to get girly.

See if those suggestions gain traction.

Beard trimmer. 2 guard. That’s your go to.

“Lost in the thicket”. LMAO!

-Augustus-

 

[backseatjuan]

I don’t expect p0rn completely shaven, just not completely o-natural.

There is plenty of good hairy p0rn. Try looking for french hairy anal.

 

[sazc]

Me thinks he bought the bushy goods and now wants to change her....

@Fruitbat ?

 

[Spaz]

Offhand/indirectly tell her its the in thing now and very fashionable for many women in the US, that all your friends find it incredibly beautiful...sexy when their wives took to the latest fashion trend in health care.

At the same time let her know that you find her cute (don't say beautiful) with her unshaven pubes and you're fine with it.

Don't push, just frame ur sentence to lead her in the direction you want her to go but let it be her decision. You just plant the seeds, let her water it etc. without offending her in the process.

 

[logicallefty]

I would say you may have a leg to stand on if her tvvat area stinks and you have cause to believe that if she trimmed it up it may smell better. I would take your side if that were the case. Short of that though, or some other health related reason, then I would say you are out of bounds for trying to force her to do that or anything to her body.

 

[Fruitbat]

Sorry it’s been a while.

She used to trim when we were first dating. Although her culture says it’s bad luck, she is modern generation and I don’t think it’s a massive issue, but on the other hand, I’ve never known a western woman who would be happy with her “arrangement”. All my previous GF always trimmed and would be embarrassed showing it untrimmed. She doesn’t have that.

So, I’ve actually gained 12 pounds since we married so I can’t say I haven’t relaxed a bit since marriage! However, I laid it out recently and basically said our sex life would be a lot better with a trim.

We’ve gone a week or two without bumping uglies at points (fat no help libido) so she said she stopped at that point. I kind of said it’s a viscous circle. I mean, who wants to go down on a rug? It’s not attractive, it’s off putting.

So I kind of said I am boycotting sex until it’s sorted which she accepted and she has now agreed to trim.

Where the ladies can help me out?

- she said she is scared of trimming as she thinks it will grow back thicker (It can’t BE much thicker. Asian girl garden is very thick anyway)

- I also pointed out she is in her prime. We are trying for kids. If now is not the time to trim it up, when? Why is she bothered about how it will be a bit thicker when she is 45?

- I’m not even sure this is true - shaving - yes, but a beard trimmer? I don’t think that makes it thicker.

I bought her a trimmer.

I trim mine and always have. I actually feel better with a trim, with full bush it doesn’t look good! And I’m a guy who shouldn’t give a shyt.

Sounds harsh but I just kind of said it’s non-negotiable if you want a full sex life. Otherwise, I’m kind of feeling very “in and out” and certainly don’t feel like going down and chewing on a glove.

I have absolutely no rules or expectations of her appearance other than this. I don’t care about her hair, skin nails, I don’t even want Hollywood bald....just trim away the 2 inch fluff. Looks like someone’s gran!

 

[AJ84]

Sorry it’s been a while.

She used to trim when we were first dating. Although her culture says it’s bad luck, she is modern generation and I don’t think it’s a massive issue, but on the other hand, I’ve never known a western woman who would be happy with her “arrangement”. All my previous GF always trimmed and would be embarrassed showing it untrimmed. She doesn’t have that.

So, I’ve actually gained 12 pounds since we married so I can’t say I haven’t relaxed a bit since marriage! However, I laid it out recently and basically said our sex life would be a lot better with a trim.

We’ve gone a week or two without bumping uglies at points (fat no help libido) so she said she stopped at that point. I kind of said it’s a viscous circle. I mean, who wants to go down on a rug? It’s not attractive, it’s off putting.

So I kind of said I am boycotting sex until it’s sorted which she accepted and she has now agreed to trim.

Where the ladies can help me out?

- she said she is scared of trimming as she thinks it will grow back thicker (It can’t BE much thicker. Asian girl garden is very thick anyway)

- I also pointed out she is in her prime. We are trying for kids. If now is not the time to trim it up, when? Why is she bothered about how it will be a bit thicker when she is 45?

- I’m not even sure this is true - shaving - yes, but a beard trimmer? I don’t think that makes it thicker.

I bought her a trimmer.

I trim mine and always have. I actually feel better with a trim, with full bush it doesn’t look good! And I’m a guy who shouldn’t give a shyt.

Sounds harsh but I just kind of said it’s non-negotiable if you want a full sex life. Otherwise, I’m kind of feeling very “in and out” and certainly don’t feel like going down and chewing on a glove.

I have absolutely no rules or expectations of her appearance other than this. I don’t care about her hair, skin nails, I don’t even want Hollywood bald....just trim away the 2 inch fluff. Looks like someone’s gran!

Why not make a deal with her that if she trims her bush and keeps it that way you will lose 12lbs. You said your libido is low because of your weight gain so in reality your sex life would be better if you lost weight and she trimmed her bush. Both of you working together on improving something. Especially if you are trying for children.

 

[sazc]

Did I read that correctly? You told her this was non negotiable? Is this really a hill you want to potentially die on?

 

[Fruitbat]

Did I read that correctly? You told her this was non negotiable? Is this really a hill you want to potentially die on?

Haha, luckily I am the catch and that gives me special powers unknown by lesser men!