Greetings and a question:

[Nick11]

Hey all. I'm new here. Really like the site so decided to sign up here. I'm 16 btw.
Anyway, for a long time I've been trying to get things straight with my situation with the ladies. I went crazy during the summer over one girl who I asked out in July (big step for me). Turned down, got upset blah blah. Of course it was really hard for me to get over. I'm still recovering even. But now, I'm happy with the fact that there's no girl that I'm going crazy over, since when it does, I get really depressed about it since I know I have trouble approaching girls. But there is a girl now at school who I think is rather cute and I'd like to get to know. Here's my question: How do I approach when there's nothing brining us together except for the fact that we're in the same building? She's a grade younger and we don't know eachother. People have told me to just go up and say hi, but something tells me it won't work...at least with todays society. Random "hi's" tend to create strange feelings. I DO know people who know her though...perhaps they can help with it. Any ideas?

 

[DonCharlie24]

oh man, heres something i do all the time when i have no connection with a girl, like if she is in none of my classes, what you do is, find out her name, and make a note! but not and ordinary note
Only write one thing in this note, "Hi" thats all, fold it up and do the "from:blah to:somegirl" make sure hi is pretty big, but not to sloppy, maybe a smiley face, works wanders bro, really breaks the ice for the next time u run into her

 

[Microphone Fiend]

notes? are you kidding me? notes are for 14 year olds and....oh....


Original poster, you need to say Hi, stop trying to blame it on today's society, Hi does work well regardless because gurls are waiting patiently for you to say anything to them

 

[Nick11]

So just like walk up to her and say "hi?" She wouldn't find that strange?
(we do have the same lunch, providing oppourtunities for talk..so i dunno...that seems to give me some advantage. just need to figure out how to harness that advantage.)

 

[NotaGoatLover]

Originally posted by Nick11
She wouldn't find that strange?

You have to start working from the inner game to outer my friend.... (Be confident, deal with all your insecurities etc etc)

 

[Nick11]

Originally posted by NotaGoatLover
from the inner game to outer my friend....

Hmm..I'm not sure what you mean by that.

 

[Sir Lancelot]

Hi is probably the most universal opener. You could also ask her for her opinion on something. You could make an observation about your guys' environment and see if she gives any kind of a favorable response.

 

[Nick11]

Alright. I'll keep these ponts in mind. Thanks a lot. I guess my main problem here is just getting over the fear of approaching girls I don't know. But I guess that's something I'll just have to make myself change.

 

[Microphone Fiend]

yea, jsut walk up and say hi. You are noticing that you have the same lunch, so yea, jus say you saw her around and she seemed kinda cool. Just ask her normal stuff, go with the conversation. As for being afraid to talk to strangers, everyone is from time to time, but once you do it often enough the fear goes away. That;s the only way to get better, not thru meditating, not thru affirmations not thru 'harnessing your inner game'

 

[Tedward]

heh. I was just about to post a topic with almost the same exact question. Girl i like in school, year younger, never talked to her, see her once or twice a day in the halls. But these guys are right, nothing wrong with going up and saying hi. Whats the worst that could happen? She is a little surprised at first, then relaxes when she realizes how cool you are.

You're 16, so probably a junior. So you have less than a year and a half left in school. After that you will never see 99% of those people ever again. I'm a senior now, havent really started taking action with girls till this year, and i regret all the time i wasted. So don't wait, take a chance.

 

[Nick11]

SUCCESS!!

The other day, my friend who knows them offered to start some conversation up/hanging outness between her and I. It went so well! We're now comfortable with talking and the day after I just went right up and started talking to her and her friends. Awesome. I feel so good. Next step is email I guess. That and getting her to come to me instead of me going to her. But yeah, if I can keep things up, then kickass!