Got contacted by a girl I had oneitis for

[Lexington]

This girl I used to have the WORST case of oneitis for a few years ago sent me an e-mail yesterday. She was basically just asking how I was doing and updated me on what was up with her. I came to realize that there is still a small tender spot there.

It took several months to get this broad out of my head....she constantly haunted me for a while. It was however something that I needed to go through. Only after that experience did I fully embrace many of the fundamental principles we accept on these forums. That experience helped to catalyze some major changes in my life... and not just in "the game."

It's funny because since that time, I've been with several different girls....most of whom are more attractive than she is. She isn't even all that attractive. I've been rejected many many times since then, and I thought nothing of all those rejections. But this was a little bit like a ghost from the past.

Anyone ever experience anything like that with an old oneitis?

With this broad, I sent a very short e-mail back basically telling her I was doing fine. This was in contrast to her really long one. She gave me her number, but I don't have any intention of ever calling. Why dig up those painful memories? No good can come of it.

 

[Knight's Cross]

Ego Boost. I had a ex that I could count on contacting me every 6 months to year. The thought that went thru my head every time was,"some guy somewhere has grown tired of her crap, and has taken the garbage to the curb". She's probably had that same thing happen to her and is contacting you for her ego which has been damaged. Women cannot stand to be dumped, or otherwise not appreciated as special flowers. You did good. If she was really a problem for you keeping any contact short was a good idea, as well spinning plates was your best solution. Keep going!
KC

 

[Jitterbug]

Don't get back in contact with her.

I had a girl I was obsessed with a while ago. Not exactly oneitis, we did fvck, and it was the best I'd ever had. She dumped me & got into a relationship with another guy shortly after. I was really incensed by that. About 2-ish years went by, then she got in touch again out of the blue. She broke up with him. I thought, what the hell, let's meet up. What I saw was like one of those hottie to fattie transformations you see on cracked.com! She wouldn't get off my back for months, was almost everywhere I went socially, and ****blocked me on quite a few occasions. It took a lot of clever tricks & help from a female friend to get her to leave me alone.

Nothing good can come from it. Move on.

 

[st_99]

Yeah, its happened to me also. Girl I had what I would call "extreme" oneitis for got back in contact with me after about 6 months, I just replied with a short friendly indifferent response, no response 6 months later. So, i don't know.

I always try to put myself on the other side of the coin. If a girl really wanted me bad and I knew it but decided not to date her because I wasn't into her for whatever reason but decided to email her months later why would I do it?

Well, maybe boredom, maybe I was thinking about her and was feeling nostalgic, maybe I was thinking about her and thought, "she was kind of cute, that was dumb", whatever the reason, she left enough of an impression for me to contact her again months later.

I can tell you there are girls that I've been with and rejected that I would NEVER consider contacting so at a minimum, it's a compliment.


And yes, my oneitis wasn't exactly a 10 either, plenty of girls way more attractive than her but she really got me hooked with her personality and things like that. Its not always about looks, there are other things I think we are drawn to for whatever reason.