Gorgeous chick at work! What should i do??

AAAgent

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There’s this new girl at work, atleast I think she’s new. Either that or she’s here from a different office but I think she’s new to the company. She’s gorgeous and I see her always staring at me. I went to the gym with my co-worker and he told me to ask her out. He said my company is laxed about those things and on top of that he noticed her blatantly checking me out. Today I happened to be walking behind her while walking back to my desk and she turns around makes direct eye contact with me and turns back around quickly (it was fvcking obvious but she didn't smile or anything). My general play is normally don’t let chicks know I’m interested until I approach them.

It’s probably not going to work out because I always fail in these situations but I got to do something about this. I will regret this one for sure.
 

sesshoDevrim

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AAAgent said:
There’s this new girl at work, atleast I think she’s new. Either that or she’s here from a different office but I think she’s new to the company. She’s gorgeous and I see her always staring at me. I went to the gym with my co-worker and he told me to ask her out. He said my company is laxed about those things and on top of that he noticed her blatantly checking me out. Today I happened to be walking behind her while walking back to my desk and she turns around makes direct eye contact with me and turns back around quickly (it was fvcking obvious but she didn't smile or anything). My general play is normally don’t let chicks know I’m interested until I approach them.

It’s probably not going to work out because I always fail in these situations but I got to do something about this. I will regret this one for sure.

I love how I almost literally just made a new thread about this (with the exception of not ever being within visible distance of her), I think I'll just wait for a response on this one. I think the solution to your problem will help me out.
 

5string

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Come on AAAgent....you can do it! Don't fear a possible rejection. Ask her out for a drink. Confidence man, confidence.
 

Audiophile

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AAA, I've seen you give some good advice on these forums, I'm surprised you actually have to post a thread about this. You seem like you already know what to do. According to your co-worker, your company is lax about these policies, so there really isn't any excuse not to even go talk to her.

Just say "Hi, I've noticed you're new around here, my name is XXXXX, where do you work (or any question)." You don't need to play these silly games about "Don't let chicks know I'm interested"... etc. EMBRACE your sexuality! Go for what you man, you can do it.

And remember, REJECTION IS BETTER THAN REGRET
 

Iceberg

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Audiophile said:
AAA, I've seen you give some good advice on these forums, I'm surprised you actually have to post a thread about this. You seem like you already know what to do. According to your co-worker, your company is lax about these policies, so there really isn't any excuse not to even go talk to her.

Just say "Hi, I've noticed you're new around here, my name is XXXXX, where do you work (or any question)." You don't need to play these silly games about "Don't let chicks know I'm interested"... etc. EMBRACE your sexuality! Go for what you man, you can do it.

And remember, REJECTION IS BETTER THAN REGRET
Agreed. This is the most typical of scenarios. Actually, this is easier than most situations because he works with the girl, so he can actually spend a few days gauging or building her interest. Day 1, a quick stop-and-chat. Day 2, "how are you settling in?" Day 3, "I think we could use a drink. Happy hour?"
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

AAAgent

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I get spurts of confidence. They don't last long and don't come often.

Truth is i know exactly what i should do, what to say and how to say it. I can already forsee reactions to different types of approaches i would do in my mind and i think i know the best ones. At least out of the options i have in my head, the best choices.

The problem is, even though i know all this and i know i approach correctly and say what i need to say it should work out well I can't get myself to do it. I'm hoping some of the comments and advice here can give me a kick in the arse to propel me into motion.
 

Audiophile

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AAAgent said:
I get spurts of confidence. They don't last long and don't come often.

Truth is i know exactly what i should do, what to say and how to say it. I can already forsee reactions to different types of approaches i would do in my mind and i think i know the best ones. At least out of the options i have in my head, the best choices.

The problem is, even though i know all this and i know i approach correctly and say what i need to say it should work out well I can't get myself to do it. I'm hoping some of the comments and advice here can give me a kick in the arse to propel me into motion.
Just read what you posted on "I need a break, seriously". I can see why you have spurts of confidence. But the most important thing is that you overcame all of that bvlls*it and are now a stronger man because of it.

You just gotta grab life by the fvcking balls and make it yours. Try to do things that you enjoy, you already work out so that's already helping! Remember man, you're the goddamned prize, this bvtch should only be so lucky to have a chance with you!

ONLY DOUBT HOLDS YOU BACK :rockon: :rockon: Be a man of action!

http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/courage-wolf
 

PDubb75

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AAAgent... you miss 100% of shots you don't take.

You say this woman is gorgeous. What if it works out?? Think how thankful you will be you sucked it up and pushed through the nervousness.

If it doesn't work out? Rejection is never as bad as you think it will be. Nobody else cares if you get rejected, especially if the girl looks as good as you say. If anything, they may think more of you for trying.

You've been here a while... I know you know all of this. Stop trying to think of all those scenarios in your mind ahead of time. That is just gonna create the uneasy feeling you are getting.

Tell us how it goes.. don't let us down here. If anything, make that the reason for trying the approach. I'm seeing so many threads of people giving up... show them how it's done.
 

Naughty Ninja

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AAAgent said:
There’s this new girl at work, atleast I think she’s new. Either that or she’s here from a different office but I think she’s new to the company. She’s gorgeous and I see her always staring at me. I went to the gym with my co-worker and he told me to ask her out. He said my company is laxed about those things and on top of that he noticed her blatantly checking me out. Today I happened to be walking behind her while walking back to my desk and she turns around makes direct eye contact with me and turns back around quickly (it was fvcking obvious but she didn't smile or anything). My general play is normally don’t let chicks know I’m interested until I approach them.

It’s probably not going to work out because I always fail in these situations but I got to do something about this. I will regret this one for sure.

All you have to do when she looks at you is smile while walking past her and ask her if she's having fun. (It's work. I like saying that to people. They open up about the new job from there.) Then tell her "Hi my name is XXX. When did you start here?" And go from there. I do it all the time with new hotties at my second job. They are people too. If she's a playette or a moron you'll find out quickly enough.

Simple. No DJ Ninja kung fu tactics needed.
 

PectoralisMajor

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Ok, heres what to do;

play it cool & walk over to her desk, unzip your pants and plonk your d1ck on her desk.

if she sucks it, she likes you right?
 

AAAgent

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Hey you only live life once. It can't get worse than dying, so i'm not too worried about bad consequences. I have enough confidence in myself to get another job if i needed and the perseverance to do so.

Well, I don't think she's a new hire. I think she's from another office since she talked to the owner of the company like they were familiar. A new hire definitely wouldn't.

Anyway, i'm ashamed and disappointed in myself. I think today's her last day in the office and the fact that i'll probably never see this chick again and i can't even talk to her i feel pretty pathetic. I'm fiending for a cigarette right now because of this stress but i can't even smoke one because i quit and going back on my word is weakness which i won't accept.

I'm not expectating anything out of approaching her, i just know i'll regret it and the fact that i can't do it while i still have time left...I feel nothing but pathetic. What is wrong with me.
 

PDubb75

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I'm sure everyone here goes through stages where you just can't find the confidence you usually have. This stuff can get pretty heavy over time.

It's an even better situation if today is her last day. Now you don't need to worry about any awkwardness if she does turn you down. Just do it, you seriously have nothing to lose.

You are already beating yourself up. What can this ONE woman do to you that is any worse?
 

AAAgent

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its not about what the outcome is, i can't get myself to approach. I'm not worried about the outcome.

I have the actual anxiety of approaching.
 

Pimp-sicle

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AAAgent said:
I get spurts of confidence. They don't last long and don't come often.

Truth is i know exactly what i should do, what to say and how to say it. [B]I can already forsee reactions to different types of approaches i would do in my mind and i think i know the best ones. At least out of the options i have in my head, the best choices. [/B]

The problem is, even though i know all this and i know i approach correctly and say what i need to say it should work out well I can't get myself to do it. I'm hoping some of the comments and advice here can give me a kick in the arse to propel me into motion.


The part I made stand out above is your main problem aside from lack of confidence.

YOU TALK YOURSELF OUT OF IT!!!


Ever heard the saying YOU think its a lot worse than it really is.... in regards to just about anything? Well this DEFINITELY APPLIES HERE.


I'll give you an example from a while back when I was in college pretty much in the same scenario as you right now.


On my morning break in college I would always go sit in the student union with a either a group of friends or by myself. One day I noticed this extremely hot girl (I rate harder than anyone I know) 8/10; light brown hair, incredible body, great ass, stunning green eyes on very sun drench tan skin. I looked at her and she looked back at me. She was probably sitting 15 ft away. I held my stare and she looked away.

Well I started noticing this chick was suddenly almost always around on my break now and her stares became more and more obvious and longer in duration.

Now I gotta admit, I didn't have any approach anxiety then or now (already went through that phase), but I mentally masturbated on "the best way to approach her" or "the right opener to say in my head" because I wanted to get this girl.

All the while this chick would stare at me, just literally STARE at me to the point where you could feel her presence from your perphiral vision.

What I realized is every time I saw her in the student union I would have time to basically over think something that was so simple. Simple in the sense that ITS OBVIOUS this woman WANTS TO be approached. If she's constantly staring she LIKES WHAT SHE SEE'S! So there's no need to say something elaborate or perfect, just go talk to her. However I still didn't approach her for at least a solid month.

Then randomly one day I saw her walking on campus, I didn't even think I just decided to fuvkin' talk to her because she was hot and I knew she was interested.

So I caught up to her, tapped her on the shoulder from behind (which is suppose to be a no no when approaching) and simply said:

"Hey I see you all the time, and I wanted to meet you." LOL----- fuvkin' lame, retarded blah blah blah..... Guess what??


She said: "I KNNNNNOOWWW!!! I STARE AT YOU ALL THE TIME IN THE STUDENT UNION BUT YOU NEVER COME UP TO TALK TO ME!!"

She smiled and I knew it was on..



Seriously THAT SIMPLE!



I get that this chick is someone at your work so its a little more complicated than that. But seriously bro, just go talk to her about anything, you don't have to formally introduce yourself, just GO TALK TO HER PERIOD. Chances are she'll be excited to meet you, probably give off a slew of IOI's and give you the chance eventually to go out with her if you grab your ballz.



Good luck




PIMP
 

Pimp-sicle

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AAAgent said:
its not about what the outcome is, i can't get myself to approach. I'm not worried about the outcome.

I have the actual anxiety of approaching.

This is a contradiction in itself dude.

People get anxiety if there's something they fear or makes them nervous BECAUSE they are not sure of how the outcome will be AND they care too much about what others think of them.

Kill your fear and your girl getting ability will sky rocket because rejection and or failure won't phase you.

You have to learn not to take rejection or failure personally in general, I always learn from my failures and it just makes me that much better.






PIMP
 

backbreaker

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There is a reason you don't **** women you work with. Because when the relationship ends, and it will end, as all relationships do, once the new car smell of the relationship wears off, you are left with a divided office. His side and Her side. One of you will go, and it's usually the guy.


Think with the big head and not the little one. ****ign women you work with should never, under any circumstances, be an option.
 

Vice

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Go for the approach dude.

Because if it goes bad, you'll still have the adrenaline high that comes with taking that risk. Ride that momentum out of the workplace and go look for another girl.
 

AAAgent

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i'm not scared of what the girl will say, i'm scared of the reactions from my surroundings. In school it was people that may see me that i may know, now its my co-workers, boss's, etc.
 

PDubb75

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Just talk to her.. you will get a sense if she has interest or not. I doubt your coworkers would find it odd that you are simply talking to someone. You are just trying to make excuses.

If your co-worker's reactions are making you that uncomfortable, it's gonna show, so try to isolate her a bit so you aren't the center of attention in the office. Maybe catch her as shes leaving, break room, etc...
 
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