Goofy behavior

[ShinerDog]

So,

Sometimes I just like being a goofu s.o.b, doing silly **** or whatever, I haven't seen much info about how that is perceived by women, I'd assume it makes you seem like a fun person, however I can see how some may find it non DJ or child like and non sexual....any opinions on this? Is it ok to not always be serious or in DJ mode, or is this a hindrance?

 

[Biggie]

I've found that it's ok to joke around and be funny, but to be the joker or clown is not attractive. If you joke around too much people will never take you seriously. From the other end, I've met girls who i thought were hot, and they turned out to be so goofy that it just turned me off. I was happy to be their friend, but they did stuff that just wasn't attractive because it was so goofy.

 

[ARrocket]

There is a time and a place for everything.

I have found that when in a large group setting, this is the ideal time for being "goofy." You instantly stand out, and are seen as a fun guy. Goes a long way with the ladies, and people in general; you're likable.

Obviously, being likable and being sexually attractive are two different things. So, as another poster astutely pointed out, you don't want to be a clown. So use in moderation.

 

[runner83]

There is a time and a place for everything.

I have found that when in a large group setting, this is the ideal time for being "goofy." You instantly stand out, and are seen as a fun guy. Goes a long way with the ladies, and people in general; you're likable.

Obviously, being likable and being sexually attractive are two different things. So, as another poster astutely pointed out, you don't want to be a clown. So use in moderation.

This.

Use in moderation and don't fall into the trap of becoming the entertaining monkey.

 

[Hakuna]

You can be funny in a dominant frame OR in a submissive frame.

submissive = funny to gain attention, look for approval, qualify yourself, entertain others for social proof

dominant = funny because you like laughing, negging, ****y/funny, etc

You have to be really good at judging yourself unbiasedly to catch yourself in a submissive frame. Most guys I know who are entertainment monkeys rationalize it by saying they are being stupid because they WANT to be stupid, but in reality it's simply a ploy for attention.

 

[ShinerDog]

I was just speaking in terms of while i'm out with friends, and I can also be goofy at work just to break up the monotony, but always get back on task quickly. I'm not necessarily trying to impress anyone, it is just part of my personality when I get too bored. I can be quite serious at times as well, just didn't know this played into the whole mind set that most of us are working towards on this forum.

Thanks for the input

 

[Brighty]

I've found that there is a distinct line between being goofy and being completely irresistible to girls (although this is moreso for going out to parties/clubs/bars). One of the most attractive things a guy can be is "fun" and having a good vibe about him. From my experience:

Goofy
- Consistently does embarrassing things, clutzy
- Makes people laugh at his own expense
- Laughs at his own jokes
- Tries to be the center of attention, tries to get people to laugh
- Someone busts their balls and he goes along with it
- Awkward
- Asexual, doesn't have a ****.


Completely irresistible
- Smiles a lot, none of that closed mouth crap, a big confident smile. Girls fall in love with that ****.
- Laughs a lot, pumps other people up throughout the night (cheering on your buddy, etc.), energetic, enthusiastic
- Makes people laugh, typically by poking fun at something relevant, but doesn't go out of his way. "I say what's on my mind because I find it funny, not because I want people to accept me."
- Projects the vibe "**** trying to get some, **** the bar game, I'm just here to get ****ed up and have a good time."
- Someone busts their balls and he quips right back with something even funnier
- Sexual, and isnt afraid to remind you of it


I guess maybe it has a more powerful effect for people like me who use the weekends to unwind and who are normally more serious during the weekdays... but I think this is applicable to pretty much anyone.

And man... once you get in that kind of feel-good state, the club literally revolves around you and bends to your whim. You guys would not believe the ridiculous **** I've pulled and gotten away with when I really get into the "completely irresistible" state.

I used to think that making an ass out of myself on the dance floor (I dont mean like being all over the place and doing ridiculously stupid moves, I mean just not being afraid to dance and be the center of attention... or trying to... im white) was a bad thing, but I've found I get a lot of more positive attention from girls when I did. Something about just being confident enough and "fun" enough makes for a winning combination. Sure, there may be some bronze, perfect greek god by the bar looking all pensive and like he's too cool for the club, but by the end of the night he's usually scratching his head as I end up going home with the hotter girl. There's no secret behind it: girls go out to have fun. If you look like you're a lot of fun, well then that's where they're going to flock to.

 

[ShinerDog]

I get what you mean Brighty, I had always heard self deprecating humor was a way of showing you are comfortable with yourself but It appears that's not the way to go. When I'm out with friends, we are always busting each other balls, I will be more aware of myself in the future.

 

[Brighty]

I get what you mean Brighty, I had always heard self deprecating humor was a way of showing you are comfortable with yourself but It appears that's not the way to go. When I'm out with friends, we are always busting each other balls, I will be more aware of myself in the future.

I might have been a little misleading - I don't mean the ball-busting thing too literally so that you should always return fire.

Me and my friends bust each others' balls all the time, even in front of girls. Obviously its okay to laugh at yourself (my friends all give me **** about how I can't dance worth a damn) if you're among good friends and its over something insignificant. Just make sure it isn't just all one-sided and that you guys are spreading the love. You don't have to always have a comeback for every single time.