Good Questions to Ask Right After the Opener in the First 5 Minutes?

Nu Vision

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I was in a mall this past Wednesday and saw this hot babe walking towards me. Followed the 3 second rule and just went for it. I asked her: "Hey, I'm looking for a shoe store. Is there an Aldo store in this mall? Do you know? She said she didn't think there was one but said I could look in Forever 21. I said thanks and then my mind went blank for a few seconds and it felt awkward. She noticed it. Then I ask if she lives nearby and comes to the mall often. She said no. From there I kind of didn't know what to say. It was too early to ask rapport building questions. Maybe I could have done some CF then? What are some good questions to ask in those first couple of minutes? This is where I struggle most.

I once was able to carry through a conversation through all the stages but this was with someone I knew from high school so it was easy to talk with her. We had things in common to talk about and reminisce.
 

El Payaso

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It's probably better to open with an open ended question. Something like "Wow. That's a very unique necklace. What's the story behind it?" Basically, anything that gets her talking for a while.

Asking her if she knows where something is located is a close ended question because once she's done, you have nothing to go off of.

With an open ended question, you can use a technique called "nouning".

Take the example I gave above. Let's say she starts talking about how she got the necklace. She talks about how it's a family heirloom and how her great, great grandma brought it here from Ireland or whatever.

Ireland is a noun. When she's done you just bounce off it. You get her talking about Ireland or whatever noun she mentioned. It could be her grandmother or the animal skin it's made of. You get the point.

There's nothing most women or people in general love talking about than themselves especially when they have an audience.

After talking for a while you can close out with the question in your OP. "Hey, I have to go now. Do you know where so-so store is located?" She tells you. You thank her and close out by asking for her number so you can conversate with her sometime.
 

void957

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Nu Vision said:
I was in a mall this past Wednesday and saw this hot babe walking towards me. Followed the 3 second rule and just went for it. I asked her: "Hey, I'm looking for a shoe store. Is there an Aldo store in this mall? Do you know? She said she didn't think there was one but said I could look in Forever 21. I said thanks and then my mind went blank for a few seconds and it felt awkward. She noticed it. Then I ask if she lives nearby and comes to the mall often. She said no. From there I kind of didn't know what to say. It was too early to ask rapport building questions. Maybe I could have done some CF then? What are some good questions to ask in those first couple of minutes? This is where I struggle most.

I once was able to carry through a conversation through all the stages but this was with someone I knew from high school so it was easy to talk with her. We had things in common to talk about and reminisce.

the key to dominating any conversation is eye contact.

Ask yourself this: how well did you keep eye contact throughout that conversation? also ask youself : was it dominant eyecontact or was it the "looking for approval" eyecontact?

So before you work on any conversation , work on being the one in control of the conversation. Because if YOURE not in control then SHE is in control. It is as simple as that.

If she is the one asking you questions, then laughing at your stupid answers, mate, she is in power.

Watch Russel Brand, even if you dont agree with his views, notice how he dominates every conversation he ever has on TV by he charm and his dominant eyecontact that no interviewer can handle.


Ok, so now youve worked on your eye contact it is time to move on to the conversation.

Here is one thing i would do:
I just start with Hey, and look em right in the eye, wait for response, if it doesnt come, I'll just say " My name is X , what is your name?".
I say my name first because there have been many occasions when the girl wouldnt ask me for my name after i ask her for hers (signs of LOW IL), so i cant afford for that to happen, so i just introduce myself ANYWAY. Also, if you want to say the whole " hey my name is X whats urs", make sure to keep a break betwwn the hey and the rest, just a short pause, watch Barack Obamas speeches, he is a master at drawing in his audience, same with the girl, you want her to anticipate what youre going to say, so a quick pause with eyecontact can go a long way.

Obviously each girl will have a completely different response to what you say. But after your opener Ask them a few questions, because the truth is, they dont even know, you have to give, in order for them to give back. So ask a few Qs dominantly. The key with any conversation is dominance and i cannot stress that enough. dont end your sentences with a high pitchhhh. Make your volume go up then at the last word of your sentence go down.

so instead of "oh reaaallyyyyyy" you say " oh really", your volume must drop, otherwise youre displaying false interest. As a side note avoid buffers, i only used this as an example. dont be going "reallyyy", "omomgomg" , when she tells you something. Because youre just trying to fill space and truth is , if u are doing that, youre not incontrol of the convo.

let me know what you think so far and if you want me to into more detail.

thanks for readin bros and sorri for the grammar and shvt, typed 2 much 2day
 

LMFAO

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Just use Roosh's method out of Day Bang.

Approach based on some observation, for example she may be holding an iPad, and ask a question about that object. Just chit chat for five minutes, let her do most of the talking just ask a couple of open questions, and get towards the close stage.

To close you can use GALNUC and it directs the conversation towards her.
G - Are you half German?
A - Age
L - Where abouts do you live
N - what's your name
U - what do you Usually do for fun
C - well, you seem cool. We should meet up sometime and do X so we can talk more <get her number>
 

Nu Vision

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El Payaso said:
It's probably better to open with an open ended question. Something like "Wow. That's a very unique necklace. What's the story behind it?" Basically, anything that gets her talking for a while.

Asking her if she knows where something is located is a close ended question because once she's done, you have nothing to go off of.

With an open ended question, you can use a technique called "nouning".

Take the example I gave above. Let's say she starts talking about how she got the necklace. She talks about how it's a family heirloom and how her great, great grandma brought it here from Ireland or whatever.

Ireland is a noun. When she's done you just bounce off it. You get her talking about Ireland or whatever noun she mentioned. It could be her grandmother or the animal skin it's made of. You get the point.

There's nothing most women or people in general love talking about than themselves especially when they have an audience.

After talking for a while you can close out with the question in your OP. "Hey, I have to go now. Do you know where so-so store is located?" She tells you. You thank her and close out by asking for her number so you can conversate with her sometime.
Thanks for the tips man.

Don't know if it's me but the question "what's the story behind it?" Is kind of weird I think. I guess if the girl is wearing something really unique/vintage then it makes sense. Truth is I was so preoccupied with what to say I didn't pay any attention to anything she was wearing. For the most part I kept giving her eye contact like recommended here but then looked away when I didn't know what to say.

I'll start using this tip you gave me. Looking back I could have asked if she likes the neighborhood and what she likes in particular and take it from there. But I froze.
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Nu Vision

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void957 said:
the key to dominating any conversation is eye contact.

Ask yourself this: how well did you keep eye contact throughout that conversation? also ask youself : was it dominant eyecontact or was it the "looking for approval" eyecontact?

So before you work on any conversation , work on being the one in control of the conversation. Because if YOURE not in control then SHE is in control. It is as simple as that.

If she is the one asking you questions, then laughing at your stupid answers, mate, she is in power.

Watch Russel Brand, even if you dont agree with his views, notice how he dominates every conversation he ever has on TV by he charm and his dominant eyecontact that no interviewer can handle.


Ok, so now youve worked on your eye contact it is time to move on to the conversation.

Here is one thing i would do:
I just start with Hey, and look em right in the eye, wait for response, if it doesnt come, I'll just say " My name is X , what is your name?".
I say my name first because there have been many occasions when the girl wouldnt ask me for my name after i ask her for hers (signs of LOW IL), so i cant afford for that to happen, so i just introduce myself ANYWAY. Also, if you want to say the whole " hey my name is X whats urs", make sure to keep a break betwwn the hey and the rest, just a short pause, watch Barack Obamas speeches, he is a master at drawing in his audience, same with the girl, you want her to anticipate what youre going to say, so a quick pause with eyecontact can go a long way.

Obviously each girl will have a completely different response to what you say. But after your opener Ask them a few questions, because the truth is, they dont even know, you have to give, in order for them to give back. So ask a few Qs dominantly. The key with any conversation is dominance and i cannot stress that enough. dont end your sentences with a high pitchhhh. Make your volume go up then at the last word of your sentence go down.

so instead of "oh reaaallyyyyyy" you say " oh really", your volume must drop, otherwise youre displaying false interest. As a side note avoid buffers, i only used this as an example. dont be going "reallyyy", "omomgomg" , when she tells you something. Because youre just trying to fill space and truth is , if u are doing that, youre not incontrol of the convo.

let me know what you think so far and if you want me to into more detail.

thanks for readin bros and sorri for the grammar and shvt, typed 2 much 2day
I think I started with good eye contact but if I someone had recorded the short convo I'm almost sure my eye contact turned to a shy approval seeking one when my mind went blank.

Will watch some Russell Brand videos. I think this could help. I've always been a shy guy and not good at making jokes or being humorous. To help me in that department I've recorded many episodes of bill maher show and some comedy acts like Louie.

I hear you about not talking with a high pitch. In my case since I'm shy the times I've had good conversations with girls I've had to up my voice and be louder than normal. Sometimes I've said hello to people in such a shy way that I wonder if they've even heard. Sucks I know ... I got lots of work to do.

Yesterday I was talking to a coworker and decided to really listen and give her eye contact throughout. I dominated the interaction and she was the one looking away at times when the eye contact got to be too much. But it was uncomfortable for me too but I just forced myself.

Where should I look to pause eye contact? The surroundings? Or should I really try to keep eye contact throughout. I think that can be too much.
 

Nu Vision

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LMFAO said:
Just use Roosh's method out of Day Bang.

Approach based on some observation, for example she may be holding an iPad, and ask a question about that object. Just chit chat for five minutes, let her do most of the talking just ask a couple of open questions, and get towards the close stage.

To close you can use GALNUC and it directs the conversation towards her.
G - Are you half German?
A - Age
L - Where abouts do you live
N - what's your name
U - what do you Usually do for fun
C - well, you seem cool. We should meet up sometime and do X so we can talk more <get her number>
There gotta be some questions that make it easier for the convo to flow lightly. Say I see a hot babe with good fashion game. I stop her and say "hey, out of all the girls I've seen today you have the most unique style." She says thanks. I follow with complimenting her shoes and asking where she got them. Then I can follow that up with a question about the particular style of the shoe and does she prefer that style over others.

See ... to me this would feel like an interview. How can I make the convo feel more casual and like I'm being friendly. What are the open ended questions that will make her give you a ton of details but that are not the ones asked in rapport building phase.

One thing I gotta work on is my mindset. I'm always thinking that if I approach a girl her radar will be up and she will automatically think I'm trying to pick her up which is true. It's my programming that's messed up. How have you guys dealt with that mental barrier?
 

Nu Vision

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Other questions I need help with ... I read Anti-Dump's posts and mr. Fingers. I get that you shouldn't show too much interest early on but at the same thing let her know you like her so you don't end up in the friend zone. How much kino would you do in the first interaction? Would touching her shoulder/hand once be enough to let her know of your interest or should more be done. What's the one thing one can do to instantly let her know you are not just looking to chit chat and make a new friend. I guess asking if she has a boyfriend would do it.
 
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