Girls that were abused / abandoned / raped
- Thread starter REPEM
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giantmecharobotnerd
Don Juan
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they deserved it
Mr Wright
Master Don Juan
Yeah, about a year ago there was this girl in my school who was 2 years above me. I had been trying to get her for years but it was too weird for her or something but i knew she was kinda into me. Anyway i invited a girl round to my house who i was interested in, we started making out and then she started to suck me off. Then out of no where she started shaking and just totally clamming up and i was so confused, naturally i tried to ignore it but i realised there was really something up. Then she started crying. Turns out that a few weeks before on Valentines day her ex boyfriend invited her up to her uni halls, locked her in his room, tied her to his bed and him and his friend systematically raped her all night and it was the first time since she was getting intimate with someone. I was about 17 at the time and didnt have a clue what to do, i comforted her and we're just friends now, as you can probably appreciate.
Also one of my old fuk buddies got abused when she was about 12, and she was nearly raped. Shes like my best friend and we totally trust each other but sometimes if im too dominate i can see she gets scared and it brings back horrible memories for her. We dont talk about it much even though we talk everyday, its just one of those things that doesnt get brought up until something catastrophic happens.
Last one i promise, this one is the one im not proud of. I went on a first date with a women, she was about 24 and i was just testing some stuff out. The fact that at 17 i got a date with a 24 year old is beyond me! Anyway, we met up and got talking about general rubbish and somehow within about 20 minutes we got onto the topic of this woman being abused by her dad when she was a kid. Then we were just walking in this wood and i just decided to kiss her, then she sucked me off in a bush there and then. I left and i havent seen her since.
Actually I guess I have one last story, its a personal one which i have only told a handful of people. Most of my friends would tell you that i am one of the most sexual people they know, but what they dont know is why. I place one of the reasons why im so sexual on the fact that i had my first sexual experience when i was ridiculously young, i was about 5-6 years old when i first had sex. (dont even ask, just trust me it happened and i tried to forget about it) and then when i was 13 i did it again, and tried to forget about it. Then i got to 14 and started to enjoy it and here we are today.
Overall, i'd say all of those girls were pretty sexual but mentally, they really need looking after. Personally, i dont seek out these women but you never know whats happened in someones past.
Also one of my old fuk buddies got abused when she was about 12, and she was nearly raped. Shes like my best friend and we totally trust each other but sometimes if im too dominate i can see she gets scared and it brings back horrible memories for her. We dont talk about it much even though we talk everyday, its just one of those things that doesnt get brought up until something catastrophic happens.
Last one i promise, this one is the one im not proud of. I went on a first date with a women, she was about 24 and i was just testing some stuff out. The fact that at 17 i got a date with a 24 year old is beyond me! Anyway, we met up and got talking about general rubbish and somehow within about 20 minutes we got onto the topic of this woman being abused by her dad when she was a kid. Then we were just walking in this wood and i just decided to kiss her, then she sucked me off in a bush there and then. I left and i havent seen her since.
Actually I guess I have one last story, its a personal one which i have only told a handful of people. Most of my friends would tell you that i am one of the most sexual people they know, but what they dont know is why. I place one of the reasons why im so sexual on the fact that i had my first sexual experience when i was ridiculously young, i was about 5-6 years old when i first had sex. (dont even ask, just trust me it happened and i tried to forget about it) and then when i was 13 i did it again, and tried to forget about it. Then i got to 14 and started to enjoy it and here we are today.
Overall, i'd say all of those girls were pretty sexual but mentally, they really need looking after. Personally, i dont seek out these women but you never know whats happened in someones past.
squirrels
Master Don Juan
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By itself, it's not a problem.
What you want to look for is any way that it affects the dynamic of the relationship. For example, if she seems uncomfortable during intimacy because of it, cries at random, or even something more subtle like getting upset when you aren't around or being very possessive and controlling.
If she ever tries to use it DIRECTLY to manipulate your behavior, i.e. tries to get you to do something/not do something for her by talking about how hard her life has been and how she "deserves" something...then you need to find a way out from under her as quickly as possible.
What you want to look for is any way that it affects the dynamic of the relationship. For example, if she seems uncomfortable during intimacy because of it, cries at random, or even something more subtle like getting upset when you aren't around or being very possessive and controlling.
If she ever tries to use it DIRECTLY to manipulate your behavior, i.e. tries to get you to do something/not do something for her by talking about how hard her life has been and how she "deserves" something...then you need to find a way out from under her as quickly as possible.
Quoted for TRUTH. The fact that a woman tells you about it is the beginning of the manipulation not the end.squirrels said:
I've dated 3 "rape" victims. Each time I heard about the rape was when they wanted me to do something major (commit, stop seeing other girls, move in together). Each time I listened to their story and still refused to do what they wanted. Each time they broke up with me soon after and started dating soemone else. Call me cynical but this is what life has shown me.
I know a couple of girls who have actually been abused and raped and they do not broadcast it, in fact its a badge of shame for them. They don't want people to know about it. These are my experiences.