Girlfriend gained weight

[DJ SO STEVE]

Instead of reviving an older thread I decided to make a fresh one.

We all know weight can't be based on location alone it must also be based on ethnicity as well. For example, oriental women are usually petite and are generally slim. If they are 5'5 and start off at 110 lbs and gain 15-20 lbs it is very noticeable. My gf gained this type of weight and although she wants to go to the gym and play tennis with me, it seems food is more important to her than her weight. She is oriental and so am I.

We don't eat much junk food, but it's the portions that are more of a problem. I'll have the amount I usually eat and she will have less however when I'm still eating she'll want to have some of mine. Then she'll say she over ate.

She's very comfortable in the relationship of almost 4 years with me now. When I met her I myself was 165lbs , now I'm 175lbs but the highest I ever weighed was 189 when I was with her. I've been keeping the same weight for about 1 year now going as low as 170lbs, it fluctuates.

Do you guys have any tips on how I get get her to slim down?
It doesn't look like she's gaining more weight, she's just maintaining her current weight and that's what I don't like. She says she wants to lose weight but no action on her part is being taken.

The sex has slowed down to once a week because I'm just not as attracted to her as I use to be. A fit body really gets me going, not a chubby one. She sometimes asks why I don't initiate intimacy, I just tell her it's not like that.

I'm all ears.

(This was meant to be posted in the Mature Man section but all advice is welcome)

 

[piranha45]

She sometimes asks why I don't initiate intimacy, I just tell her it's not like that.

I'm all ears.
)

If you're too cowardly to lay down the law and inform her she's getting fat, then there's a relationship problem on YOUR end.

You need to be upfront and straightforward with her about what her priority is, and her priority needs to be being a slim and trim girl. And you need to LEAD BY EXAMPLE.

Throw all your crap food out of the house. BOTH OF YOU need to get on a proper diet, and you personally will have to take the initiative on this.

If she doesn't follow, or seems like she diet-cheats behind your back, you leave her. You're too good to be hanging around non-submissive chubbos.

But you will not have success pushing her onto a weight-loss program, if you do not make your goal clear and lead by example.

 

[archon8692]

What does her mom look like?

 

[DJ SO STEVE]

I will get back to my 165 and will start today.
And to answer the question, her mother is super slim and goes to the gym every day. Eats well and is very fit like no fat no chub nothing.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

I will get back to my 165 and will start today.
And to answer the question, her mother is super slim and goes to the gym every day. Eats well and is very fit like no fat no chub nothing.

You are pretty much going to have to tell her to that she needs to start losing weight to so she can be healthier and your attraction will be high. If she refuses than dump her lol. Remember, fat ugly women have orbiters too, so they will not really receive consequences for gaining weight.

My gf was gaining weight and I didn't tell her she was fat, but was pretty much on wrong path and it would affect her future very much. I guess she started eating better because she was skinnier last time I saw her lol.

 

[El Payaso]

Tell her she's getting fat and needs to start exercising. Point blank. If you're too scared to tell her, you have bigger problems on your hand.

 

[backbreaker]

you don't tell her anything. just start commenting on random hot skinny women. she'll get it.

 

[DJ SO STEVE]

you don't tell her anything. just start commenting on random hot skinny women. she'll get it.

I can just imagine getting a slap in the face if I do that in front of her. Isn't there a different way than being straight up blunt like that?

 

[piranha45]

I can just imagine getting a slap in the face if I do that in front of her. Isn't there a different way than being straight up blunt like that?

dude. seriously? You accept that sort of attitude in a woman? You're willing to call this woman yours?

You have bigger problems than just having a big woman. You still embrace the beta male mentality. "Oh ok honey im sorry for being rude, ill sleep on the couch tonight "


I looked at your post count and time on here and figured you had the basics down. But you don't...

Its obvious this chubbo you call your woman can willfully ignore you and you'll be willing just slink away in shame. You don't lead the relationship... I assumed in my first post that you did.

I suggest you take a shot at grabbing your balls out from her purse and read the DJ bible. You need the basics. And you need to accept that this relationship is probably hopeless and you'll probably need to leave her because she's so used to your submission that she won't accept drastic change.



...Unless you want to just be another chump living with a fat dominant female. It's a sad truth that most guys ARE willing to do that. If that's your thing then great, but this board is not the place for betas who are unwilling to make the change to alpha.

 

[Peña]

Have her buy bigger clothes. :crackup:

Are you not the man who is supposed to lead? You are scared to bring it up to her worried about being slapped in the face. That is beta. Both of you should lose some weight. Go walking, jogging, tennis, racquetball, go to the gym together. Do activities that she is doing more excercise than eating. She will get the hint. Sounds like you are embarrassed of her and can not get no one better.

 

[bigneil]

Tips:

*First thing in the morning (after a glass of distilled or reverse osmosis water) she should drink the juice of a fresh-squeezed grapefruit.
*Soft boiled organic eggs for breakfast.
*Take Spirulina and Chlorella daily (Health Ranger Select brand is best).
*Avoid processed foods, artificial colors and flavors, and wheat gluten.
*Only choose organic, bone-in cuts of meat like whole chickens or beef shank from grass fed beef (I order mine at Burgundy Pasture Beef who delivers).
*Grow fresh organic Alfalfa sprouts, the most nutrient-dense food on Earth.
*Grow Heirloom Blue Lake Pole Beans, Squash and Cilantro in your garden if possible.
*Make fresh salsa (tomato, onion, pepper, lime, garlic, cilantro, cayenne, cumin, coriander, olive oil, raw cider vinegar and sea salt) and serve with organic sprouted chips.
*Mix salsa with avocados for the best guacamole.
*Don't listen to thatfeel who claims that GMO food is wonderful and that organic food is part of a conspiracy. She obviously has stock in McDonald's or something.
*If she won't take diet advice, dump her sorry expanding arse (I don't mean thatfeel, but that too).

I just got my gf on the same diet as she started gaining weight also. It happens around age 21-22 with most women.

 

[Peña]

Blood work and thyroid, get that checked, if she can't lose weight. I spend 3y with a chubby women she was not my type at all, and it was 3y of hell when i dumped her sold the house and all everything became normal again.

I am very active, am losing weight right now getting back in shape, and if i ever date another women she is not going to be over weight.

Thanks for everything guys ( leaving the board)

My time is done here

Still posting here? I thought you were leaving the board.

 

[SmooveMooves]

If you want her to be in shape, you must be in shape as well. Hit the gym. Start a routine. Once you start slimming down your market value increases she'll have to do the same or lose you.

Like another poster mentioned, you have to LEAD by example. As a man, a Don Juan, you are the leader in the relationship.

 

[DJ SO STEVE]

Hey Guys,

Thanks for all the advice, I have changed my diet since yesterday and made working out my second priority aside from my diet. Yesterday I was 179.2, this morning I am 178.4. I have lost 10 pounds in 1 month exercising 4 times per week while having a healthy diet. I'm counting my calories and already can feel the difference.

I will lead by example and if problems still persist I will leave the relationship.

I will keep you all posted on my progress through this thread.
I will also read the DJ Bible fully this time around.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

If you want her to be in shape, you must be in shape as well. Hit the gym. Start a routine. Once you start slimming down your market value increases she'll have to do the same or lose you.

Like another poster mentioned, you have to LEAD by example. As a man, a Don Juan, you are the leader in the relationship.

This is a myth, most american women are spoiled and entitled. They don't need a man anymore, they just want **** from an alpha male.

 

[Voice]

Any update? I'm currently having the same problem with my gf. Been with her for 3 years and she is the heaviest she's ever been. When we first started going out she was thin 5'4 about 110. She's now about 135-140. She doesn't eat healthy and doesn't exercise anymore. I straight up tell her that she needs to eat healthier and go to the gym but she always has some excuse. She won't do any exercise with me because she insists I'll make fun of her.

She straight up doesn't look good naked anymore. I don't want sex with her nearly as much and I'm constantly looking at other chicks. Part of me feels bad because she is always very stressed out and busy because she's in law school.

 

[pyros]

The real issue here is that she A either thinks OP will never dump her, so she doesnt care, or B she just doesnt carea about OP at all, I mean, she's not in love with him anymore.

Its either A or B

I would play some dread games with her for a couple of months so she gets the hint. If after this she still doesnt lose weight ---> she is just not interested in OP anymore.