Backbencher
Don Juan
- Joined
- May 22, 2006
- Messages
- 10
- Reaction score
- 0
So I have this female friend who I spend a lot of time with. We talk on the phone a lot, go see music shows, have dinner and hang out a lot. I'd say we're close. The only thing that bugs me is that whenever we're at a bar or a club together, she won't dance with me. Say after having spent an evening together, we'll go to a club... She'll dance with other friends, male or female, usually as platonic as me, but not me. Usually I act like it doesn't bother me. She's extremely social and wants to see everyone at the same time. We're not together and it's pretty obvious she isn't interested in me in anything other than a friend, so I don't have any right to make a big deal out of it. Still, it bugs me that she should only see me as this friend you can only talk & do passive stuff with. I'd like her to see me as someone you can also have fun - dancing fun - with.
When I try to dance in front of her on the dancefloor, she moves away or says she has to go to the ladies room or get a drink. When I dance with other people or by myself and wait for her to join me, she never does. A few weeks back I casually let her know her indifference towards me on the dancefloor bothered me, as I don't go out that often and would like to share a few moments with her when I do. She said it wasn't on purpose and told me from now on she'd dance with me so much I'd have to call security. Yet she still doesn't do it. Yesterday we were at a bar on the dancefloor, for the first time in forever she had been by my side for more than 10 seconds, so I asked her as a joke if tonight would finally be the moment where she'd dance with me. She said I was making her feel self-conscious and, of course, moved away.
Obviously I'm not gonna bring this up around her again but I'm wondering what to do. We're pretty confortable around each other and like I said, I want her to see my fun side. The goal in the end is for her to see me as a sexual being. My hopes aren't too high as I know my chances of getting out of the friend zone here are low, but for god's sake I should be able to dance with my female friend withough creeping her out. Nothing else is possible if I can't at least do that. I know I don't necessarily dance very well but neither does she. Other than spinning other plates and moving on (which I'm working on), what should I do?
When I try to dance in front of her on the dancefloor, she moves away or says she has to go to the ladies room or get a drink. When I dance with other people or by myself and wait for her to join me, she never does. A few weeks back I casually let her know her indifference towards me on the dancefloor bothered me, as I don't go out that often and would like to share a few moments with her when I do. She said it wasn't on purpose and told me from now on she'd dance with me so much I'd have to call security. Yet she still doesn't do it. Yesterday we were at a bar on the dancefloor, for the first time in forever she had been by my side for more than 10 seconds, so I asked her as a joke if tonight would finally be the moment where she'd dance with me. She said I was making her feel self-conscious and, of course, moved away.
Obviously I'm not gonna bring this up around her again but I'm wondering what to do. We're pretty confortable around each other and like I said, I want her to see my fun side. The goal in the end is for her to see me as a sexual being. My hopes aren't too high as I know my chances of getting out of the friend zone here are low, but for god's sake I should be able to dance with my female friend withough creeping her out. Nothing else is possible if I can't at least do that. I know I don't necessarily dance very well but neither does she. Other than spinning other plates and moving on (which I'm working on), what should I do?