girl at work

[wildleopard]

hey everyone!

i just havta ask you all for advice.. there's a girl thats been stealing glances from me at work.. im new there.. and for the past 2 days she profusely smiles and blushes when she catches me looking at her..
well finally we bumped into each other and said the usual hello etc.. and introduced ourselves and asked about our depts in the company.. i actually followed her down the lift and then she said she has to go as soon as the lift opened.. which actually disappointed me..
now its a large company and our breaks dont match so its real difficult to meet her..
i have searched for her email thru the comp database.. but i dont know how to actually start the convo and how to eventually ask her out.. im sure i wud be able to ask her out once i break the ice and we start meeting and once i get her mobile num etc.. i just dont know a good idea to do it without looking like a stalker coz she didnt give me her email herself..

please please help.. i want her by my side this christmas..

thanks

mark

 

[JJMcLure]

As a general rule, avoid dating at work.

That said, if you do want to proceed, next time you see her and have a brief convo, leave with a parting comment about you have to go do X, Y, Z but perhaps you could continue your conversation at lunch. So, ask her straight up to join you for lunch - if there's a work cafeteria that would be a low risk option (it's non-threatening and less 'serious' than going outside). e.g. "I am planning to get lunch today at 12:30pm in the cafeteria, would you like to join me". Then use that opportunity to build rapport and take it from there.

 

[Effington]

Yep, next time you see her tell her that you two should do lunch, and get her email and phone extension (if she has a company line). A lot of people say to avoid the coworkers, but honestly it happens all the time, the only times I've ever seen problems is if you worked closely together.

 

[PlaysToWin]

What exactly do you want our help or advice on?

Whether to ask her out? I'd say if you are in different depts and don't see each other as a rule then you're grand. Go for it.

When to ask her out? In person, at the next opportunity, without hesitation. "Fancy a coffee after work?" or similar.

What date to suggest? Coffee or bite to eat after work is a simple suggestion.

Whether to ask for contact details? You can ask for phone number but there's no rush since you can wander over to her desk easily enough. Maybe just after your coffee date if you get on fairly well. Maybe use the xmas break as an excuse to need the phone number, if you even need an excuse.

 

[Mr. Wolf]

Wildleopard, you are screwed this Christmas.. Women want dirty sex on the down low. You working there with her, it's not possible..

If you start a thing with her it could end up bad and you can end up ending your career..


Though, the way to get her is to be cool with her, none stalker, none dependent beta.. Just cool.. Don't call her, don't follow her.. She comes around, fine, but still be cool. Don't have to say much, just convey that you're cool and won't tell anyone..

 

[delta545]

As a general rule, avoid dating at work.

That said, if you do want to proceed, next time you see her and have a brief convo, leave with a parting comment about you have to go do X, Y, Z but perhaps you could continue your conversation at lunch. So, ask her straight up to join you for lunch - if there's a work cafeteria that would be a low risk option (it's non-threatening and less 'serious' than going outside). e.g. "I am planning to get lunch today at 12:30pm in the cafeteria, would you like to join me". Then use that opportunity to build rapport and take it from there.

Yeah man. As much as possible, avoid dating at work. It would cause some tension. But the next time you see her just make small talk. Good luck!

 

[My Name is Nobody]

I recently banged a girl at my work but she has given me the LJBF line. She gives mixed signals though because we banged one more time after the LJBF line. But after that 2nd bang she is not trying to hang out anymore.

I have been chasing her for the last month texting and calling and she always replies to me but that was a mistake because it didn't work and now I REALLY feel like I am in the friend zone.

I should have ignored her this past month and see what happened. I have a feeling if I went this route I'd be hitting it again.

So I vow right now as of this post I will never contact her again until she starts chasing me. Sometimes I sit in the cubicle right across from her too.. hehehe.. doesnt bother me... except for the fact I miss her bad and she knows it.

I didn't play my hand properly and I'm paying the price.

 

[Derek Flint]

Sorry dude, but your post is creeping me out, so imagine how she feels.

1) Don't date women from work. I could write a book why it's not a good idea.

2) You probably don't have other options if you are so obsessed with this chick from work. It says you don't get out much and don't know or date other girls.

3) As stated above, your post gives off a stalker, creepy vibe so imagine the vibe you are giving off in person. This relates to #2 above.

It seems like you haven't progressed at all since you first posted here over 4 years ago:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?p=332150#post332150

hey everyone!

i just havta ask you all for advice.. there's a girl thats been stealing glances from me at work.. im new there.. and for the past 2 days she profusely smiles and blushes when she catches me looking at her..
well finally we bumped into each other and said the usual hello etc.. and introduced ourselves and asked about our depts in the company.. i actually followed her down the lift and then she said she has to go as soon as the lift opened.. which actually disappointed me..
now its a large company and our breaks dont match so its real difficult to meet her..
i have searched for her email thru the comp database.. but i dont know how to actually start the convo and how to eventually ask her out.. im sure i wud be able to ask her out once i break the ice and we start meeting and once i get her mobile num etc.. i just dont know a good idea to do it without looking like a stalker coz she didnt give me her email herself..

please please help.. i want her by my side this christmas..

thanks

mark

 

[Rebound Material]

hey everyone!

i just havta ask you all for advice.. there's a girl thats been stealing glances from me at work.. im new there.. and for the past 2 days she profusely smiles and blushes when she catches me looking at her..
well finally we bumped into each other and said the usual hello etc.. and introduced ourselves and asked about our depts in the company.. i actually followed her down the lift and then she said she has to go as soon as the lift opened.. which actually disappointed me..
now its a large company and our breaks dont match so its real difficult to meet her..
i have searched for her email thru the comp database.. but i dont know how to actually start the convo and how to eventually ask her out.. im sure i wud be able to ask her out once i break the ice and we start meeting and once i get her mobile num etc.. i just dont know a good idea to do it without looking like a stalker coz she didnt give me her email herself..

please please help.. i want her by my side this christmas..

thanks

mark

Wow, your situation is very similar to mine except for the fact that Im sure I didnt come off as a stalker following her around. We also dont work the same shifts(she works day and I work nights) so when im coming in to work, she's on her way out(working together is rare). I also had a chance to get her number the cheaters way and thats by looking at the employee contacts list, but it just didnt feel right so I didnt. But this all changed about a week ago when I was asked to work a morning shift and she happened to be working also. They say that you should take it slow, stay as mysterious as possible and most importantly to NOT DATE CO-WORKERS, but since we hardly see eachother for lenghty periods of time and the fact that working together was totally rare I took a total risk and broke all of those rules. In the 6 hours we worked together, I did what I call my "drive-by's"(going up to her every now and then and completely flirt with her neg-hit style/make her laugh and LEAVE her laughing). She gave off the obvious IOI's like light punches on the arm, being a bit excited/nervous around me, smiling alot, breaks eye contact first while smiling/giggling etc. I ended up getting her number and facebook/myspace pages at the end of the day. We've texted/called eachother this whole week(She initiated half of them) and yesterday I asked her to join me for some gelato(which I posted a thread about) on friday and she agreed. Im pretty sure Im moving quite fast paced and that my intentions are out there, but in situations like ours where communication time is scarce I say YOU HAVE to make a significant advancement on them like getting their number or some form of contact because you never know when you're gonna get another chance. And if you wait too long some other fcuker could have snatched her up already.