Gf going to hang out with ex

[emelec]

well i was suppose to hang out with my girl tom but cant due to work. she is going to hang out with her ex instead who moved back to the city. anyways it got me really mad and i tried not show jealous but i lost it and got mad with her and started yelling.then after a while I calmed down and told her I was fine with it that i had to get it off my chest. that i had flashbacks of me in hs when i messed up relationships. but i trusted her and go have fun. she was in love with this guy a while back but he played her. couple of weeks ago she showed me an email he sent her in which he declared his love for her. she said hes a good guy he knws about me and he wouldnt try. idk i trust her but its still gonna bother me right now and the whole day tommorow.

what should I do?

 

[( . )( . )]

what should I do?

You like porn?

i trust her

Oh so your the sort of guy I feel a tinge of guilt over while my c@ck is in her mouth?

 

[sprint]

holy crap! dude why does she want to hang out with him?

if she respected you she wouldn't do that. Seriously, this is something you just cannot accept, especially after he sent her an email and said he "loved" her. did she respond? i bet she did.

but yeah, DO NOT let her think you're cool with it. she's just going to walk all over you. don't trust that guy. you're insane if you do. plus now you'll know if she really likes you. if she decides to go then drop her. otherwise she'll just dump you in the future for him. it's your call but i would say not to let her go thinking it's OK. Let her know it's not acceptable behavior.

also, try telling her you're going to go and hang out with one of your exes. just see how she responds.

 

[Maurizio 2.0]

This is a ****ty situation. If your GF was really into then you wouldn't be faced with having to take one of three bad options.

1) You tell her you're not ok with her seeing this guy. You come of as insecure, weak and controlling.

2) You let her go and see this guy. When people think about their pasts they will recall all of the positive traits and neglect all the sources of conflict, so you you can bet she will feel nostalgic for the good times that she and the ex felt together.

3) You can walk away now and try to save face. She will be left with the perception that you're throwing a hissy, overreacting, and use this rationalization to comfort herself without you. We already know she can, and probably will, rebound off of you with the ex.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

As the others said here, GF + visiting her ex + ex still has feeling for her = trouble:trouble: :trouble:

Here's how this one is going to work. You're either going to tell her how you feel or you're going to walk away. She will not be visiting your ex as long as ou two are together (since it's not ok with you).

Maurizio brings up a good point in that you sound weak and insecure if you protest, but I think sounding confident and eloquent here will not show this. Say something like this to her:

"Look [gf's name]. I know I'm going to come off as a little overbearing here or w/e, but I am not ok with you seeing your ex, especially after he professed his love for you. Too many times I've heard stories of this situation and seen this sorta thing first hand (the latter may be stretching the truth),, and oftentimes it does not end well for the relationship. I trust you - make no mistake about that, but I do not trust your ex. Call me insecure and call me jealous, but the bottom line is I am not comfortable with you visiting an ex who still has feelings for you."

This takes the form of Eminem's rap at the end of 8 Mile. You basically already throw out anything she can call you (jealous, insecure, etc.) without even really saying you are those things! More importantly, if you say this with confidence and dignity, she will need to make a decision on the spot. See the ex, or tell him no? If she says she's still visiting the ex, you walk away. Yes it's a little drastic, but it states a point that her actions cannot be tolerated, and if she still really likes you then you will be getting a call very soon. If she says she cancelled seeing the ex, then you know she still likes you. However, if she jumps to go "hang out with him," you will see her true colors; action speaks louder than words.

 

[penkitten]

i agree with the comeback kid.

 

[rapidfire]

danger will robinson. this is never a good sign.

forget coming across as 'insecure'...do you think she would be okay if you said to her "I am planning on hanging out with my ex girlfriend"? of course she wouldn't, she would flip out, so why is this any different?

Tell her you are not comfortable with her hanging out with her ex. You are boyfriend and girlfriend and any guys she dated before should be a thing of the past and she should not be hanging out with them. If after this she still tells you she will still see him, tell her that is alright and you won't be forcing her against her will, but she shouldn't call you her "boyfriend" anymore.

If she respected you, do you think she would even bring this up? It's just like those women that get fat before their boyfriends/husbands eyes..do you think if they respected tehir men they would let that happen? No, they wouldn't let themselves go because they want to keep their men happy and have them remain faithful. It's a matter of self respect. You have to nip the problem at the bud before it blooms. By telling her this you run the risk of her wanting to break up, but look at it this way, what happens if you don't do anything? She could hang out with this guy, cheat and eventually break up with you anyway. You got to put your foot down on stuff like this. One thing I have noticed is if you don't, women slowly begin to walk all over you. They constantly, constantly try to push the envelope to see what they can and can't get away with.

 

[DJsparky]

You like porn?



Oh so your the sort of guy I feel a tinge of guilt over while my c@ck is in her mouth?

Dude why are you trying to act cool to a bunch of guys dedicated to improving their game?

Anyways aside from the douchebag comment. I have been in your situation many times. You can say this is a test. Although tests are never usually concious anyways, so she wont realize she's doing it. But the more you get jealous the worse it will be for you.

The less you show your jealousy and go distant on her, the more she'll see you as high value. I suggest sending her a text "Off to Stacys, talk to you later" Dont reply, dont tell her who stacy is, just do it and dont talk to her for a day.

Trust me she'll be thinking about you all day.

 

[brian123]

I've been in the exact same situation. Would you do the same to her? Of course you wouldn't. You deserve better.

Go with what the kid says.

 

[Metaphysical]

Put it this way:

This guy played her and broke her heart. She was still in love with him but she couldn't get him at the time because he was playing the game properly (LIKE YOU SHOULD BE DOING).

So the girl ends up falling in love with him and obsessing over him for the next few weeks/months or whatever. Now that he is back in her life, she lights up again and has hope it will work out.

She is going to hang out with him, she is already infatuated and obsessed by the guy and probabily doesn't care if you stay or if you go. She is using you as a refueling station. This is something i have done to women many many times ago, using them as my backup.

She is playing you royally and you are not even seeing it.

When the bad boy will get bored with her, he will probabily dump her again and she might come crawling back to you. But in the end, he will always be the one that she is in love with, while you are just the backup.

That's the life you are heading towards unless you make some major changes in your attitude and your life.

 

[PectoralisMajor]

number 1 - NEVER EVER loose your cool with your lady.

number 2, if you think she is being unreasonable, and let me tell you she is BIG TIME with this, twist it back onto her and say - 'would you be happy if I met up with my ex?'

if she is putting you in this situation she clearly doesnt care much about your relationship buddy. been here and done this - in her mind she will think its OK, but if you were to do it then there would be WORLD WAR 3 incoming.

listen to the advice here. and above especially.

 

[decades]

I don't know? You could order them take out? Maybe see if you can bring them a cool DVD?

Dude, your GF is PLAYING you like you just woke up from a 12 year NAP and don't know wtf is going on. Dump Her!

 

[In2theGame]

Just reading the topic is enough to tell me, your gonna get played. Use common sense, Your Girlfriend+Ex B/f+possible emotion= You getting played and your "g/f" Cheating on you with him. Come on man, Seriously,..think about this.

 

[In2theGame]

Oh so your the sort of guy I feel a tinge of guilt over while my c@ck is in her mouth?

lol

 

[BlackJackal]

The girl will play you. No woman in her right mind would even make a delimma like this possoble if she respected you. Key word respect. Dont let her play that whole innocent act on you. I'd drop her like a bad habit, and save myself the drama. It doesnt matter how she veiws you if you next her. She's not truly thinkin about you anyway.

 

[KontrollerX]

Topics like this and the fvckin AFC symps on here still question why I promote the Tom Leykis show so much?

Anyway yeah I obviously agree with T!ttyman and persistant exaction.

Put a stop to this sh!t immediately and if she disagrees you and she are done.

She is going to get fvcked by this guy if she goes to see him.

Chicks that still want to associate with their ex without a good reason for doing so like say them sharing a kid together are bad bad news.

(Note: Though you shouldn't be involved with a chick with a kid anyway)

They are still hung up over their ex and want to go ride the ex's c0ck again and ride away in the sunset with that ex far away from you if possible.

 

[DonGorgon]

well i was suppose to hang out with my girl tom but cant due to work. she is going to hang out with her ex instead who moved back to the city. anyways it got me really mad and i tried not show jealous but i lost it and got mad with her and started yelling.then after a while I calmed down and told her I was fine with it that i had to get it off my chest. that i had flashbacks of me in hs when i messed up relationships. but i trusted her and go have fun. she was in love with this guy a while back but he played her. couple of weeks ago she showed me an email he sent her in which he declared his love for her. she said hes a good guy he knws about me and he wouldnt try. idk i trust her but its still gonna bother me right now and the whole day tommorow.

what should I do?

Dont worry about what she is doing ... you go and hang out with some hot chicks...

 

[Solomon]

well i was suppose to hang out with my girl tom but cant due to work. she is going to hang out with her ex instead who moved back to the city. anyways it got me really mad and i tried not show jealous but i lost it and got mad with her and started yelling.then after a while I calmed down and told her I was fine with it that i had to get it off my chest. that i had flashbacks of me in hs when i messed up relationships. but i trusted her and go have fun. she was in love with this guy a while back but he played her. couple of weeks ago she showed me an email he sent her in which he declared his love for her. she said hes a good guy he knws about me and he wouldnt try. idk i trust her but its still gonna bother me right now and the whole day tommorow.

what should I do?

How old are you? I was in a similar situation when I was 19 (5 years ago)
It's a lose-lose situation, but I +1 comeback kid, if that aint work, then keep it moving, the whole "off to stacy's thing..." won't work and is lame, trust me, its her game and if you play it you gonna lose, unless you take the ball back in your court

-Solo

 

[In2theGame]

Topics like this and the fvckin AFC symps on here still question why I promote the Tom Leykis show so much?

Anyway yeah I obviously agree with T!ttyman and persistant exaction.

Put a stop to this sh!t immediately and if she disagrees you and she are done.

She is going to get fvcked by this guy if she goes to see him.

Chicks that still want to associate with their ex without a good reason for doing so like say them sharing a kid together are bad bad news.

(Note: Though you shouldn't be involved with a chick with a kid anyway)

They are still hung up over their ex and want to go ride the ex's c0ck again and ride away in the sunset with that ex far away from you if possible.

I agree with Kontroller, especially about the part where she might get F*cked because thats whats on the Ex's mind guarenteed.

BTW, Kontroller Where the F do u get these quotes in ur location describtion? lol whats next? "Preparing to invade AFC's across the globe with DJ ammunition"? nice quotes though.

 

[Relationship-Buddy]

It spells only problems and trouble.

Esp. since he says he still has feelings for her - why in the world would she go see him then? To say "lets be friends, Mr. Ex" (?)

You shouldn't allow this to happen, and if she gives you problems then:

Let her go and meet him, but (the kicker is that) you go with them.

Good Luck!