And she swore it was me!
Well, you were the one looking at porn on her computer weren't you? Who else could it be?
We have been broken up for exactly a week now Here is what happened...
Ah, the old blame, fight, and break up routine. One of the classic moves a chick does when she wants to break up with a boyfriend but doesn't how to tell him. It's her perfect excuse, and the perfect way for her to get out of it, while she turns the tables and blames the guy for the break up. Just like we see here. She is losing interest in the guy, and wants out so she has a big fight with him, accuses him for something he does, she gains control, he is explaining and pleading, then she breaks up with him, and places the blame on him, while she looks innocent when she really isn't. If a girl really liked and cared about her boyfriend and got in a fight with him, she wouldn't be so quick to break up with him that fast. They would talk over things and make up. She wanted to break up. She was waiting for a time that there would be a fight and she goes through with it. It was planned and there were 4 threads just like this during the week.
We are in a LDR of 1.5 years
You mean was in a LDR. There was another guy on here that had his end, just like you, and his was a year and a half also. LDR's rarely work and hard to manage.
and i came to visit her for a week.
that was very nice of you....in retrospect, that wasn't a such a good idea.
While she was at work, I looked at porn and may or may not have downloaded any files.
Why were you looking at porn on her computer? That was stupid. That is what got you in this predicament in the first place. You know you can get viruses and stuff and you did it anyway. Anytime you use other people's things, a lot things can go wrong, and now you know that. Instead of looking at porn on her computer, you should of waited until she got home from work, and then banged her. That's what I would of done. That's a lot better than looking at porn isn't it?
So a few days later while im napping, she runs her 3 virus scanners and it picks up on a keylogger. Her computer is new and i'm the only other person who has ever used it, so she put 2 + 2 together. Everyone knows how often porn sites get hacked, and i told her this but she just woudnt believe me.
Which was stupid for you to do since you know that. Not to speculate but, kind of ironic that after you use her computer, she runs the virus scans and you get blamed for it. Maybe she knows you look at porn and wanted to check. Or maybe she knew that you would go on it, and have the keylogger excuse to dump you. I heard of a chick who used the same excuse to dump her boyfriend.
The next morning she kicked me out and drove me to the train station, making me pay $80 to get back home.
That was quick wasn't it? She didn't even hear what you had to say. She didn't even listen. She just kicked you out and dumped you. You let her disrespect you and let her take control. Doesn't sound like a caring, loving, reasonable girlfriend to me. She wanted you out and the relationship over. Here you're nice enough to come visit her and you let her do that to you. My question to you is....why did you let her humiliate you like that? Stand up and be a man and put her in her place. You should never let a chick kick you out, you walk out, you don't get kicked out.
I pleaded with her for us to talk this out
You just broke one of Elmer's Laws. Never plead or beg with a chick. It makes you look weak, very weak, just like you did. You will lose control of your relationship and give her control, and the power, and she will make all the decisions from that point on, just like she is doing with you now.
I pleaded with her for us to talk this out but she was way too mad and couldnt be convinced otherwise.
Why are you pleading and begging with her? Groveling at her feet like a little man while she humiliates you and gains control of your relationship. You just gave all your power away to her and put her in control. You can never reason logic with an angry chick full of angry emotions with an illogical mind. It doesn't work.
You should of quickly turned things around, and put her accusations and blame on HER for accusing you and put her in her place right then. Told her that she is disrespecting you after you came to visit and you won't put up with her behavior. Told her that she has no right to accuse you when she knows that sites carry viruses and keyloggers. Tell her you wont put up with that behavior and walk out. Lot better than begging and pleading with her and getting kicked out isnt it? That way it would of been on YOUR terms, not hers. Then she would be at fault and you would be in the driver's seat to make your own decisions and keep control.
So i go NC for 3 or 4 days and while i'm looking at Windows Defender, i discovered that the scanner picked up on a keylogger that was installed a few weeks ago; how ironic! I then send her a picture of the scanner log to show her that my computer almost had one on mines as well, but still not convinced.
of course she wasn't, she is in control, and doesn't need this relationship. why did you contact her after she dumped you?
So we've been talking regularly now for a few days (through texts),
Let me ask you a question...why are you still talking with her? After she humiliated you, accused you, dumped you, kicked you out, made you go home, and now doesn't trust you? She is still in control, she dumped you. Why do you want to go back for more? Things won't get better after this and next time it will get worse.
and it pretty much feels like we're back together,
How is that? From a few texts? she still doesn't trust you, she never got back together with you. so how does it feel like you're back together?
but she is still saying shes not 100% sure about us because she says she cant be with someone who she feels doesn't trust her (mainly cuz i read her journal about 6 mos ago).
of course she says that, she needs an excuse on why YOU cant be together. that is why she blamed you and used the fight routine to break up. she looks innocent and is making you out to be the bad guy. Why did you read her journal?
So my question is do I go NC again or do I maintain the contact we've been doing at this point?
your relationship is over, finished , done. she doesn't respect you anymore and still blames you. she humiliated you, kicked you out, and made you go home. why would you still want to talk to her or be with her? why go back for more abuse? why should you talk to a chick who totally disrespects you and doesn't think much of you. Why should you plead to be with her? Don't even talk to her anymore, because she has made up her mind she doesn't trust you. She said that. Quit playing games with her.
She's slowly starting to trust me again, but if after another week she's still saying 'she doesn't know',
LOL she slowly trusts you, then doesn't know. She is playing games with you and stringing you along. Quit playing her games and after she humliated you. Why do you have to prove yourself to her? she still says she doesn't trust you because she is using it as an excuse for the reason for keeping the break up going. Stop playing her games because each week she will still say the same thing.
then i wouldn't know what to do.
I know what you should do. How about finding a new chick that respects you, doesn't accuse you, wants to be with you, and that lives closer to you. Sounds like an easy solution to me. You should tell this chick off, quit playing her games and stop talking to her, and ignore her, that is what you should do today.
