Gay Friends

[ANIRBAN]

HiDJ,

My last nite date was older than me and she told me that she has a lot of gay friends and infact she only hangs around with gays and therefore she has no boyfriend..when I asked why..she told me that gay treat women betetr than staright men..but I ddi not hiit her too much cause I am her client..she is working for my office documents. WI kind of like her..but after this Gay friends thing..I was really turned off. She also has a restaurant of her won and her apaftmentin the same builaind ..aan when we were having some ice cream two of her gay friends cam to see me out of curiosity and they started teasing her and passing comments..ina positive way...I felt kind of uncomfortable.

She seems to be enjoying this gay attention. Why she has so many gay friends...and she even told me that straight guys dont approach her for this reason of hanging out with gay friends..

Please give me some feedback...i am noew into this gay thing..I think I should next her. Is she lesbian or something or she is digin this gay guys..how to check..is there some test...help!!

 

[matius]

Please give me some feedback...i am noew into this gay thing

I'm totally and utterly confused by your post. Are you now into this gay thing or what? Man, instead of trying to get these people e-books on sex, there should be a listing for dictionary's. Getting sick of wading through jibberish.

 

[MrNiceGuy]

by the sounds of it, you're freaked out because this girl has gay (i'm assuming male friends) and you never come across anything like it before.
Well, as for her reasoning shes right, some gay men and girls tend to get on better. I guess the girls dont see them as a threat at all, plus some gay men act more effeminete and they can gossip all they want about boys. She has gay friends because she likes the gay people she's met and they've become her friends, I think concluding shes a lesbian because she has gay male friends is a bit of a leap of logic.

I'm guessing you're slightly homophobic and feel uneasy that if you go out with this girl you might meet (and possibly even have to talk to!) some gay people (shock, horror! ). So its up to you, do you like this girl enough to try an overcome your fear of gay men?

 

[ANIRBAN]

Homophobic

Hey,

Man ..first I am sorry for making so many errors on my post.I typed that in a hurry during office time . yeah, I am kind of homophobic..but what if some of her friends are bisexual and they like Men and my "date" as well..the last thing I want is to get beaten up by these people and also get popular in the gay community

Guess I will try to take her out somewhere in my area. Is it okay if I tell her that I am not comfortable with her gay friends and I prefer only the two of us on a date...hope she doesnt feel insulted.

Thanks!!

 

[boost]

Originally posted by ANIRBAN
HiDJ,

betetr than staright men..but I ddi not hiit her too much ... WI kind of like her... She also has a restaurant of her won and her apaftmentin the same builaind ...

i am noew into this gay thing... Is she lesbian or something or she is digin this gay guys...

If the girl owns a restaurant and apartment, I don't think you will be dating her for long. But what the hell, take a shot anyway.

 

[matius]

boost- why do you say this?

Is it okay if I tell her that I am not comfortable with her gay friends and I prefer only the two of us on a date

hey man, are you saying she brought her gay friends with you guys on a date? i don't understand that part.

Well, I personally wouldn't put it like that exactly. Just go with the second part, 'I prefer only the two of us on a date.' Even though I understand - I wouldn't want to hang out with the cast of Queer as Folk - you definitely don't want to come off sounding like you're insecure.

 

[( . )( . )]

what i deciphered was this chick has alot of gay friends.

so what? lotsa chicks do , this is normal.

She seems to be enjoying this gay attention

and?.... gay or not its male "attention" and always a good thing for her.

straight guys dont approach her for this reason of hanging out with gay friends..

I find this strange, if shes a great girl and these "straight" guys are comfortable with themselves, what in hell does her gay mates have to do with anything?
unless these "straight" guys are infact a tiny bit crooked (if you know what i mean) i cant see how it would be a problem.

Is she lesbian or something or she is digin this gay guys.how to check..is there some test...

huh? how did you come to this unreal conclusion?
test.. yes there is one i know of:
if she enjoys phucking men then chances are she isnt.

 

[es_mer8]

IMO, gay friends to her are probably the equivalent of female friends. I don't see that as really a big deal. I'm not sure if gay men are 100% gay but if she treats them as friends, they are in the friend zone anyway most likely so you're probably set. As for her being a lesbian...wtf? What made you come to that conclusion? Unless she enjoys that bi-stuff with other attractive ladies in which in that case, you got a winner.

 

[CyranoDeBergerac]

My best Friend is Gay. I've gone with him to predominantly gay restaurants and met some of the most gorgeous, sexually liberated women out there who thought I was all the more attractive for my easy going manner and my comfort in such a place 'despite' my heterosexuality. That alone has gotten me more than an empassionaed kiss and a heated moment with a beautiful woman. If anything, gay friends are a positive for so many reasons... not the least of which is that they're great wingmen at best, and great social proof at least.

Take my friend Brian for instance. A fellow pisces, and thus the soul of romance incarnated, he spent all of his high school years earning money getting his straight friends laid. He used to plan dates and set up hotel rooms for his friends when they brought their dates back, resplendent with sultry music, rose petals, and tons of candles. He had a 99.999% sucess rate, and that's only because one of his friends took out a girl who was mortally afraid of losing her virginity. If I remember the story correctly, she kept chanting "Room for Jesus, room for Jesus..." Lol. Brian liked to joke that it took an act of god to break his record... To this day, he mixes a mean drink and throws the best parties...

Then there's my friend Matthew. He used to work at club Paradise (the premiere gentleman's club in Vegas) and besides being the best wingman I've ever had/been with/or seen, he gets free drinks from half the bars in Vegas... benefits? I would say so, yes.

But to answer your post..you are involved with what is commonly known as a 'fag hag'. She hangs around with gay men because not only aren't they threatening, but they're more fun and less likely to back-stab her than most of her female friends are I'll wager.

One other thing I notice about why women like gay men is that they are always lavishing compliments on them...

"Honey, you look fabulous."
or
"I want you to know that I love everything you're wearing and I am furious that I didn't find those shoes/glasses/ that top first!"

Illustrating my point, Rosanne bar once quipped,"Why did god make gay men? Because otherwise fat women would have no one to dance with!" (and one could add 'or to tell them they're beautiful')

Sometimes its just nice to get away from the sexual politics...

other than that, if it bothers you that she has gay friends, there is nothing keeping you there. Find a fem that isn't fag friendly...

-CyranoDeBergerac

 

[ANIRBAN]

Thanks !!!

Thanks...I learned a lot from you experts. God bless the Gay men. I will start DJing her soon.

 

[Shiftkey]

My last GF has a lot of gay friends. I always thought they were kinda funny, and she'd laugh at all of the jokes I would make about them (as long as you're not cruel - be careful here).

 

[Oscar Wilde]

I read an older thread on this forum which I can't find since, but basically it was about DJs feeling threatened, or homophobic, or something.

I think going out with gay guys is great, because you can have fun with them messing, and they have no problems giving you compliments. The girl(s) will see that you're confident and comfortable with your sexuality, and that these guys think you're a good looking guy or whatever. And they won't try and steal your girl! Perfect!

Also, you can find out a lot of useful information from them - they know a lot about fashion & how you should dress (colours etc) - use them to advise you.

 

[TheCloser]

Any girl that says I only have gay friends has deeper problems...trust me when I say NEXT HER

 

[drZaius09]

Gay men tend to be extremely primiscuous (sp) sexually, so she may hang with them to have a community of friends that widely accept her as a sl*t. For instance, if this girl *is* a major wh0re, she can hang out with her gay buddies (who pork each other in the ass at the drop of a hat) and her loose, sl*tty behavior goes by relatively unnoticed. Whereas that same behavior will get her labeled as a wh0re by other straight girls. As a point of order, I've never met a girl with mostly gay friends that wasn't a huge sl*t and a bi-sexual to boot. I would bet solid cash money that your girl is the same: a wh0re and a bi-sexual. This may not be true, that's just my experience (and I have a LOT of experience with these types). Good luck.

 

[A1SteakSauce]

gay friend angle

i've never had any gay friends. however, i was at a cafe a month ago and i made some. i was there to meet chicks but they showed up and started chatting me up. so i was friendly and before i knew it i knew everyone's name. however, i skipped that place ever since b/c i can't say that they weren't hot for me!!

so how do i tell them i'm straight and turn them into wing-um-"men"

A1

 

[CyranoDeBergerac]

Re: gay friend angle

Originally posted by A1SteakSauce
i've never had any gay friends. however, i was at a cafe a month ago and i made some. i was there to meet chicks but they showed up and started chatting me up. so i was friendly and before i knew it i knew everyone's name. however, i skipped that place ever since b/c i can't say that they weren't hot for me!!

so how do i tell them i'm straight and turn them into wing-um-"men"

A1

Repeat after me," No thanx, I'm straight."

They tend to dispute the fact at first because there are a number of 'striaght' guys who go to places with gay men and have an affair or two. My best Friend Elijah has had two of these experiences where a 'straight' guy has best right in the middle of sex with him and said," You know this doesn't make me gay right? I'm only doing this until I find a girlfriend". Hmmm

But once they're convinced of your actual hetero-ness, they usual drop it and think its so fabulous that you're so confident in your masculinity. Next thing you know they're talking about all the girls they know who would be so cute with you... (or at least, that was the case with me, and even if it isn't, refer to my last post)

-CyranoDeBergerac

 

[A1SteakSauce]

Alright, wtf, I'm gonna hang out at that cafe again b/c I liked it and there were plenty of women there. Maybe I'll end up making some gay friends, too, and, bonus, meeting their women

A1