Friend told me to post my situation here

[xxjswxx]

So here goes:
I'm caught up in a weird situation with this girl. I met her about a month and half ago and about two weeks after that she started dating this guy from her hometown...but he's currently stationed in iraq at the moment so the only communication they ever have is if he calls her, mail or AIM. Now I don't normally do the whole girlfriend stealing thing but this guy literally just beat me to the punch.
As of the past couple weeks, we've been spending a lot of time together, she sleeps at my place a lot...even has her own toothbrush as of a few days ago...This girl is always flirting with me, biting me, grabbing me, teasing etc... and I'll do it back. She even dropped $60 on dinner last night when we went out because I only had my debit card on me and she insisted she pay.

Guys hit on her all the time, she works as a bartender/server. I won't make a move and kiss her because I'm unsure of her intentions considering she still does have this bf...Something that has made me real uncomfortable is her talking to her bf in my presence...but when we were in bed one night she def. was feeling on my junk and knows when I get a hard on. As far as me talking to her less, I don't call her, I let her call me...or I'll see her at work and ask if she's coming over when she gets off, my buddies like to all hangout, drink, and play pool there. I've tried making her jealous, I'd make napkin roses for the other girls at the bar, if I talk to somebody online she asks if its a girl, or she asks how I know these girls who's pictures she sees. How do I get this chick to drop the other guy already because I'm tired of her mind games etc... Sorry bout the long read, I could have added more but I stopped myself.

 

[Spook]

It's not normal that I would say don't go after another guy's girl...BUT, this guy is in Iraq fighting for this country. Back off. There are plenty of chicks out there, and hooking up with them isn't hard at all. Back off of this one out of respect for yourself.

 

[xxjswxx]

k I did take that into consideration, and normally I wouldn't do that...believe me, but this situation deems a tad different than the norm to me

 

[nishbuk]

I agree with spook 100%. This guy is a soldier, fighting for his life. Let him have the piece of mind that there's a cool girl that cares about him back home. Don't steal his girl, it's just not right. Think about what it would be like if you were in Iraq, could die at any moment, and your girlfriend wants to break up with you for some other guy? Let it alone, for no other reason, than the man is a soldier. I'm not asking you to have respect for the war on Iraq (I'm anti war), but you should have the highest respect for those men that are over there fighting for their lives (I'm pro soldier).

 

[xxjswxx]

I have a very high respect for the soldiers, you have no idea. I didn't want to make this a debate about the morals of what I'm doing because he's a soldier either...
but just like any other relationship, they arent married, its been less than a month, etc...
Can we please just bypass the fact that I have told you what he has chosen to do.

 

[Spook]

That's the crux of the issue, though. It shows that you lack any hint of self-control if you choose to pursue this relationship. I'm embarassed for you.

I won't help you, that's for sure. But, there might be others on the board that will help you if you make it a bit more clear what you're asking for.

 

[Poppa3]

Not to defend you or anything, but would you want to be with a girl that would cheat on her man fighting for our country? Doesnt seem like she can be trusted..... I do not know who would be worse..you or her

 

[typical]

Listen to these guys bro, poppa layed it out right, and go watch jarhead bro, it may knock some sense into you.

If you can steal her off him then anyone else could steal her off you.

And there is a ocean out there go fishing for others, you dont need this chick !!!

 

[DoTheDew]

Alright man....i see what you are saying and where you are going, the way you word this makes it alittle hard to understand, but i understand lol. Let me see if im getting this right....

she sleeps at my place a lot...even has her own toothbrush as of a few days ago...This girl is always flirting with me, biting me, grabbing me, teasing etc...

This right here makes me think shes into you or shes a crazy wack job/teaser

we were in bed one night she def. was feeling on my junk and knows when I get a hard on.

TEASING YOU.....if she feels your junk in your bed!!!...shes fair game!!!!! i dont give a flip if her bf is in the army,navy,etc...hell you said they've only been together for like 2 weeks.. how serious can THEY be if shes sleeping in YOUR BED!

but...if you think shes toying with you. then call her out! say something like " hey do you know what you are doing??!?" or simply kick her ass out of your bed and tell her she needs to make up her mind.

if I talk to somebody online she asks if its a girl, or she asks how I know these girls who's pictures she sees.

yeah this is jealousy....all girls can have this, weither she likes you or not...i have friends that are girls that get jealous of other girls i hang out with. so thats kinda a shot in the dark.even though yes IT COULD mean she likes you.

How do I get this chick to drop the other guy already because I'm tired of her mind games etc... Sorry bout the long read, I could have added more but I stopped myself.

well you cant get her to do anything.....she has to drop the guy herself. If you are tired of her mind games then maybe you should move on..seriously man shes getting to your head. This babe has got your **** in a vice it seems like. I honestly like girls that play games, but there is a line that if crossed I ditch the ***** and move on. Some girls love the attention so much they will do whatever it takes to get it, even if it means breaking your wittle heart! sorry bro...

 

[brucevangeorge]

It would be disrespectful if you did take his girl. Don't dishonour the man. That is just despicable and weak.

Plus, if I were a soldier and someone like you did such a thing.... you would be in for it. Not for the girl.


For the principle.

 

[DoTheDew]

It would be disrespectful if you did take his girl. Don't dishonour the man. That is just despicable and weak.

Plus, if I were a soldier and someone like you did such a thing.... you would be in for it. Not for the girl.


For the principle.

yeah...and if i was a soldier i wouldnt start dating a girl 2 weeks before i left for IRAQ. I just love making girls WORRY to death!

Thats just not the honorable thing to do.

 

[Wubbman]

It's not normal that I would say don't go after another guy's girl...BUT, this guy is in Iraq fighting for this country. Back off. There are plenty of chicks out there, and hooking up with them isn't hard at all. Back off of this one out of respect for yourself.

+1 Don't turn into Jody.

 

[Spook]

Whether or not the girl is honorable or not (she isn't) isn't relevant.

If you pursue this girl, it's an admission that you're a weakling who sacrifices basic honor and self-respect for a piece of tail. It's embarassing for you and goes well beyond whatever kind of relationship this girl has with the soldier. This is a matter of principle and a matter of acting like a man.

The fact is, you're pathetic if you do this to a soldier (who's not in-country to stand for himself on the matter). You've basically shown your complete weakness and your inability to control yourself. Rather, you've let a random woman control you - everything this board is against.

 

[( . )( . )]

So at the moment your her girlfriend, a cuddle b!tch for her sleepovers?

"Oh Noo dont dishonour the soldier" Jesus wept.

Either tap it or throw it away, cause I tell you once she tires of your timidness shes going to drop you like a hot rock mate, this going gaga over the b!tches toothbrush and because she dropped a dime on you has got to stop, and check out the DJ bible while your here.

 

[diplomatic_lies]

Actually, this reminds me of this funny news story about the US soldier who caught his girlfriend with another man, so he goes and cuts the guy's head off.

Well, it might not be funny to you, but I find it hilarious.

 

[( . )( . )]

Well, it might not be funny to you, but I find it hilarious.

You would ya fuggin weirdo. :crazy:

I can just see you, when your not fighting for womens rights or yapping on about slavery your masterbating like crazed monkey over rotten.com

"What! a guy gets his face blown off? ARE YOU SERIOUS???"

*reaches for a new box of tissues*

 

[Scrumtulescence]

Just take her. It's not like they have a real history together (they went out for a few weeks?), and if she's so willing to hook up with you, then obviously this guy doesn't have such a sweet girl waiting for him at home anyway. Just keep that aspect of her character in mind if you get serious with her yourself.

Now if they were in a real relationship, then that would be a different matter, and you'd be a ***** for going after a soldier's actual girlfriend while he's off at war. But then again, what kind of 'loyal' girlfriend would have sleepovers at another guy's house, heavily flirt with him and feel up his junk?

 

[backbreaker]

Every guy has a set of morals that he lives and guides by.

I have slept with women that had BF's.

I have slept with women that were married.

One thing I could, under no circumstances bring myself to do is sleep with a man's girl, when the man is over fighting a war.

Just can't do it.

I have had 2 different opprotunties. Didn't even think twice about it. HOw could you?


That's as heartless, spinless and desperate as it gets.

It's not that this girl is THAT GREAT. It's that it's probably your only option right now.

That's what happens when you get desperate and you feend for a womans attention.

I mean for gods sake, you must not have any family members fighting in the War. I have 3 and I feel bad enough for them as it is. Two are married. One Girl and One Guy, both Cousins of mine.

I would kick their spouses in the ass and let them have it if I found out personally that they were doing something behind my cousins back while they were out fighting to make the heads of the country richer (couldn't resist)

And I am against the war. It's just the princapal at hand.

That principal goes back to thousands of years ago.

you don't **** around when your husband is fighting for the country, you just don't

I don't care if she is giving you a runway with neon lights leading to her cat, you turn and go the other way.

You ahve to grow a set. If not for you, for the fact that her BF might make you eat your balls when he gets back.

But you should do it out of resepct for your fellow man.

 

[BlahBlah]

Wow...


I always find it extremely amusing whenever I see people on this site complaining about what someone else is doing is "just not right" or proclaim "have some morals for God's sake!"

The same people giving you sh*t for wanting to get with this chick are the same ones, as one of them has even admitted openly in this very thread, that will willingly and consciously have sex with married women, accumulate as many girlfriends/****buddies/etc. as possible, use other women solely for the purpose of obtaining more, and so forth.

But try to get with the 2-week girlfriend of a man who will be overseas indefinitely and suddenly an onslaught of objectors come in here to make you feel guilty for thinking about getting with a female that has shown you several signs of interest.

Perhaps if this were a site filled with, you know, ethical people I could at least understand how people are finding this objectionable.

Perhaps if there were a mandatory draft causing this guy to be forced into the military and sent to Iraq against his will rather than the actual situation: a man getting assigned to Iraq as a part of his previously-known obligation/occupational duty as an employee of the U.S. Military Service. I suppose if this guy cheats on this girl while in Iraq (and believe me, it'll happen if he ends up being stationed there long enough), no one here would raise an objectionable finger.

Perhaps if this guy was actually married to this girl and in Iraq (rather than their highly-committed 2-week-long relationship ) I would raise objection... not because of him being in Iraq, but because of... *gasp*... marriage.

Hell, perhaps if this site were not filled with tips of toying with women's emotion's to make them susceptible to further mind games designed to make the "HB's" more likely to f*ck you regardless of how much of a sleeze you may or may not actually be, and other forms of basic manipulation... maybe then I could understand where everyone is coming from with the value-judgements.

Long Rant Short: We all know why we're here, so get off your high horses *******s.

-------

In regards to the actual question at hand, I'd say she's made it more or less evident that she has, at the very least, some interest in you.

However, as previously mentioned in this thread, this chick probably isn't girlfriend material, so only pursue if you're looking for easy sex. If not, at least always carry that debit card so you can snag a few more $60 dinners before she catches on haha

 

[diplomatic_lies]

You would ya fuggin weirdo. :crazy:

I can just see you, when your not fighting for womens rights or yapping on about slavery your masterbating like crazed monkey over rotten.com

"What! a guy gets his face blown off? ARE YOU SERIOUS???"

*reaches for a new box of tissues*

I know you love me, but we're not meant to be. I'm straight, you see. Sorry, hon. I'm sure theres a guy out there for you.