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FiRsT fRienD ThEn GIrLfrieND? or GF from the start?

apvcovenman_79

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that is the question ....to be or not to be ...
what is your experience fella? .... if you have a female friend you really DIG but she is actually with a B/F ... meanwhile you keep meeting other women at dance clubs ....but all of a suden she (your female friend)dumps her B/F ....
what would you prefer or what is better in a LTR ?.... meet a chick on a dance club ....ask her out(first date you see and feel she has high IL she kisses you ) ....but on the other hand you have this female friend ....that is available ....And she invites you to see a movie at her house.....you try to kiss her and she WELCOMED your nice long lingering kiss ....and you also feel that she has high IL in you.....which one would you choose??
 

Kodiac

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Both, date em both :)
 

Julian

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^^werd
 

b's nuts

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i would say it depends on what you are looking for. if you are looking for an LTR, go for the friend. But if you aren't interested in an LTR, definately hit 'em both.
 

becker

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Originally posted by b's nuts
i would say it depends on what you are looking for. if you are looking for an LTR, go for the friend. But if you aren't interested in an LTR, definately hit 'em both.
Very insightful, long, thought out post there, b's nuts. heh heh :) j/k.

Anyways, I'd go for the friend since she likely has more qualities that you enjoy being around. It is also for this very reason that I think making friends with a girl is also the way to go if you're looking for a lasting relationship. Again, the hard part is selling her to the idea that you two should become more than friends after a while (see my other post below about "friends" debate). What you have to do is tell her that she shouldn't think about the possibility of losing a friendship, but rather gaining a great relationship.

Anyone trying to do this, it's sort of like you want to convince her to live in the present and not look so far into the future, because nobody knows what the future holds, and you need to learn one day at a time.
 

squirrels

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Is there any particular reason you would need to be immediately exclusive with your friend?

You may feel more attached to the friend, but remember, up until now, she was just a FRIEND. You're just STARTING to experience her as a woman. That's a whole new dynamic.

You're also just starting to experience this other girl.

Date a little while and see where you want to be. Then make the call. Don't rush into an exclusive relationship...in all truth, she's probably not ready for one just yet either if she just broke up with her man.
 

apvcovenman_79

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Originally posted by b's nuts
i would say it depends on what you are looking for. if you are looking for an LTR, go for the friend. But if you aren't interested in an LTR, definately hit 'em both.
the point is that I am 27 ....one of 'em is 29 , the other 20......with the 29 chick i feel kinda' ....don't know... may be the age ?....the 29 gal asked me on the second date how many children I wanted to have in the future.... with which I felt kinda pushed... is she more interested in finding a husband than in me?...she called me last night and asked me if I were religious and if I agreed with the idea of ..virgin till marriage..to which she said she did not.....thank god!
this doesn't happen with the 20 gal it is not that I do not want to get married but ... those type of questions are way to fast for me ...I think that we first have to get along a while before getting into marriage stuff...
 
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