-Boogerman-
Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2002
- Messages
- 95
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I have tested and tested now for a while what does work in conversation and what do not work in conversation. I have tried this with my friends, my enemies and strangers. Many of my theories have not worked but most of them have. I will share with you the result of these tests. It may seem that you are humiliating yourself, but in the contrary you are humiliating the other person without him knowing.
Section I – General Rules
I think the general rule is that people want to feel that they are bigger, better and smarter than the person they are communicating with, unless o course the person idolizes the other. Feeling superior to another person is logical like everything in the human nature. When we feel superior we feel better about ourselves, we get positive emotions, a better self esteem. Inside all of us there is usually something that we believe makes us better than others in a way or another. Most people look for validation everyday. If you act superior to another then that person will start to hate you or at least dislike you very much. When someone seems just a little more superior than another instant connection is formed; the person becomes attached to the other so it can experience the wonderful emotions again.
Another deep level connector is trust. If we trust a person so much so we reveal what we think inside then we feel very strong connective emotions to that person. Think of sometime you were sad and a person comforted you, didn’t you feel more connected to the person you told what troubled you to? Another example of this can be if someone tells you a secret. You are the only one that will know about this and thus you feel special.
Section II – Techniques for connection
A year ago I didn’t say more than hundred words per day. I was introvert, lived in my own world hoping against hope that my life would change to the better. I watched movies and dreamed about me being a star, while I knew I was ugly, asocial and unwanted. At one point I even wanted to commit suicide since I was always alone and bullied by half of the school. One thing changed this.
I was walking down a corridor and suddenly one of the most beautiful girls in the school said hi to me. I fell in love instantly, the first person who validated my existence. I remember that I stopped in her tracks and from that moment I swore to myself that I would change my life to the better. Since I was such an introverted person I started to look for the meaning of connection and the art of conversation everywhere. All the things I will say are the result of this yearlong learning. This story is a good example of seduction in its most simple forms. Fulfilling a need in the other person. I wanted someone to care about me, and she fulfilled my desire. Seduction is just about that, tapping into another person’s needs and fulfilling them; but on to the techniques.
Lecturing
People have a deep knowledge about something in their life, an interest, a hobby or just experience. They all want to talk endlessly about it if they just can find a person who listens. I am not suggestion you to listen for hours about something that bores you, just listen to what the person has to say about it. Seem like you are learning something from what the person is saying. Ask questions and watch the joy on their faces as they answer them with ease. The trick here is not to ask too advanced questions since their knowledge will seem shallower to them then. If you look down at their interest or hobby and they discover it, they WILL start to hate you. You cannot fix this easy, you are insulting their divine knowledge about their innermost interests and that will lead to destruction of any conversation or seduction. People will banish persons who bring them pain.
Tell about beliefs or own ideas
If a person has a belief to talk about, follow the same procedure here too. Do not criticize their ideas or beliefs since they again are so private and intimate. Listen to their ideas and seem enlightened by the logic in their theories, ideas or beliefs. You must seem to be sincere or you will have to use total honesty to restore the relationship to its basics.
Winning arguments
We all like to be right, right? People like to be the winner of an argument since it is extreme compliment to their intelligence. If you in some unfortunate way get yourself into an argument, play along for a while and then do a total surrender where your arguments seems to have vanished and the other persons logic convince you. If you want to be right and win the argument, people will not listen anyway. The only thing you manage to do is to reinforce their own belief instead of convincing them to yours. You will also stir up negative emotions that will bring them pain. We remember what people do with people that bring them pain! And the most fatal, you are insulting their intelligence and seem superior!
Listening to stories
People love to hear stories about the things they like. If the person like romance, then take her out on a walk in the night where the stars shine and tell them the romantic story about Stozyss and Halbo. You should have isolated the desires of the person so that you can make up a story beforehand that includes all this things. This is EXTREMELY effective in seduction since you can tell the story and describe the environment around you and mirror all the actions in the story to what you do yourself. This will create the sense like they are inside the story! And the brain has hard to differ from pictures of fantasy and reality!
“Halbo looked into her eyes *look into her eyes* and grabbed her hands like this *show her how he did* and slowly said with a gentle voice that is passionate to hear. *look into her eyes and talk gentle with passion* “You enchant me, when I look into your eyes I am transfixed. As much as my heart desire, I wish nothing more than to feel the smooth texture of your lips and the fresh taste of a first kiss.” Then he slowly moved towards her *move towards her* and gave her the most wonderful kiss she has ever been given. *kiss her*” (If she is positive then you can start telling her all matter of things after this. She will listen to every word and associate them to her. For example you can say, “and she just felt that her trapped emotions once again could be reawakened, opening the gates to her heart for a spring after the winter.”)
Pretty simple. Oh, by the way, that story will seem very AFC for the most o you. I encourage you that the term AFC is very different from person to person. If a desperate need of a person involves you to be AFC then it is nothing to worry about, the feelings you stir up will cover this for that time. Remember that you are just doing a roll in a play. You are NOT an AFC if you are only playing.
Total honesty
This involves for the person to barren his soul to another in a real or a fake way. I used this technique to restore trust into my friendship with an enemy and former friend. I was very mistrusted and the only way it seemed was that I wanted to tell about everything in my point of view. So I asked him for forgiveness and said that I didn’t want our friendship to die of just one miserable mistake. The key here is to seam dumb and sincere. Tell them a story, which include everything that has happened, in a VERY dumb way of seeing things. I they do not trust you, here’s the key, tell them that they can ask you anything at all and you will answer honestly to everything said. When they ask questions, then answer as you wish, as long as it seem that you are sincere. Try to believe that you are sincere and you will look sincere. I think this is hard to describe like this. I you have questions about it just ask.
Master the art of fluff words
When you talk, try not to just asking questions. It will seem like a cross-examination. Instead try to add some humor, or a short statement of your own perception of the things the other person said. Or tell a little story (funny if you do not know her needs and desires). Never just ask questions.
Use silence
I read a post about silence on this page and I do not know if this is added to that post. Silence is a great tool to use. It makes the conversation calm and easy. Using silence can be a little tricky though. You should not always wait a little before saying anything. Sometimes think for a few seconds if it is a tough question. If you are discussing something that you both agree on then saying things hasty is only good because it heightens connection.
Be aware of the other persons mood
Always talk in a slightly similar way as the other person whom you are talking with. If they are sad, add some sadness to your voice, if they are happy, add some happiness or perhaps a little natural smile, as simple as that.
Comments are warmly appreciated!
Section I – General Rules
I think the general rule is that people want to feel that they are bigger, better and smarter than the person they are communicating with, unless o course the person idolizes the other. Feeling superior to another person is logical like everything in the human nature. When we feel superior we feel better about ourselves, we get positive emotions, a better self esteem. Inside all of us there is usually something that we believe makes us better than others in a way or another. Most people look for validation everyday. If you act superior to another then that person will start to hate you or at least dislike you very much. When someone seems just a little more superior than another instant connection is formed; the person becomes attached to the other so it can experience the wonderful emotions again.
Another deep level connector is trust. If we trust a person so much so we reveal what we think inside then we feel very strong connective emotions to that person. Think of sometime you were sad and a person comforted you, didn’t you feel more connected to the person you told what troubled you to? Another example of this can be if someone tells you a secret. You are the only one that will know about this and thus you feel special.
Section II – Techniques for connection
A year ago I didn’t say more than hundred words per day. I was introvert, lived in my own world hoping against hope that my life would change to the better. I watched movies and dreamed about me being a star, while I knew I was ugly, asocial and unwanted. At one point I even wanted to commit suicide since I was always alone and bullied by half of the school. One thing changed this.
I was walking down a corridor and suddenly one of the most beautiful girls in the school said hi to me. I fell in love instantly, the first person who validated my existence. I remember that I stopped in her tracks and from that moment I swore to myself that I would change my life to the better. Since I was such an introverted person I started to look for the meaning of connection and the art of conversation everywhere. All the things I will say are the result of this yearlong learning. This story is a good example of seduction in its most simple forms. Fulfilling a need in the other person. I wanted someone to care about me, and she fulfilled my desire. Seduction is just about that, tapping into another person’s needs and fulfilling them; but on to the techniques.
Lecturing
People have a deep knowledge about something in their life, an interest, a hobby or just experience. They all want to talk endlessly about it if they just can find a person who listens. I am not suggestion you to listen for hours about something that bores you, just listen to what the person has to say about it. Seem like you are learning something from what the person is saying. Ask questions and watch the joy on their faces as they answer them with ease. The trick here is not to ask too advanced questions since their knowledge will seem shallower to them then. If you look down at their interest or hobby and they discover it, they WILL start to hate you. You cannot fix this easy, you are insulting their divine knowledge about their innermost interests and that will lead to destruction of any conversation or seduction. People will banish persons who bring them pain.
Tell about beliefs or own ideas
If a person has a belief to talk about, follow the same procedure here too. Do not criticize their ideas or beliefs since they again are so private and intimate. Listen to their ideas and seem enlightened by the logic in their theories, ideas or beliefs. You must seem to be sincere or you will have to use total honesty to restore the relationship to its basics.
Winning arguments
We all like to be right, right? People like to be the winner of an argument since it is extreme compliment to their intelligence. If you in some unfortunate way get yourself into an argument, play along for a while and then do a total surrender where your arguments seems to have vanished and the other persons logic convince you. If you want to be right and win the argument, people will not listen anyway. The only thing you manage to do is to reinforce their own belief instead of convincing them to yours. You will also stir up negative emotions that will bring them pain. We remember what people do with people that bring them pain! And the most fatal, you are insulting their intelligence and seem superior!
Listening to stories
People love to hear stories about the things they like. If the person like romance, then take her out on a walk in the night where the stars shine and tell them the romantic story about Stozyss and Halbo. You should have isolated the desires of the person so that you can make up a story beforehand that includes all this things. This is EXTREMELY effective in seduction since you can tell the story and describe the environment around you and mirror all the actions in the story to what you do yourself. This will create the sense like they are inside the story! And the brain has hard to differ from pictures of fantasy and reality!
“Halbo looked into her eyes *look into her eyes* and grabbed her hands like this *show her how he did* and slowly said with a gentle voice that is passionate to hear. *look into her eyes and talk gentle with passion* “You enchant me, when I look into your eyes I am transfixed. As much as my heart desire, I wish nothing more than to feel the smooth texture of your lips and the fresh taste of a first kiss.” Then he slowly moved towards her *move towards her* and gave her the most wonderful kiss she has ever been given. *kiss her*” (If she is positive then you can start telling her all matter of things after this. She will listen to every word and associate them to her. For example you can say, “and she just felt that her trapped emotions once again could be reawakened, opening the gates to her heart for a spring after the winter.”)
Pretty simple. Oh, by the way, that story will seem very AFC for the most o you. I encourage you that the term AFC is very different from person to person. If a desperate need of a person involves you to be AFC then it is nothing to worry about, the feelings you stir up will cover this for that time. Remember that you are just doing a roll in a play. You are NOT an AFC if you are only playing.
Total honesty
This involves for the person to barren his soul to another in a real or a fake way. I used this technique to restore trust into my friendship with an enemy and former friend. I was very mistrusted and the only way it seemed was that I wanted to tell about everything in my point of view. So I asked him for forgiveness and said that I didn’t want our friendship to die of just one miserable mistake. The key here is to seam dumb and sincere. Tell them a story, which include everything that has happened, in a VERY dumb way of seeing things. I they do not trust you, here’s the key, tell them that they can ask you anything at all and you will answer honestly to everything said. When they ask questions, then answer as you wish, as long as it seem that you are sincere. Try to believe that you are sincere and you will look sincere. I think this is hard to describe like this. I you have questions about it just ask.
Master the art of fluff words
When you talk, try not to just asking questions. It will seem like a cross-examination. Instead try to add some humor, or a short statement of your own perception of the things the other person said. Or tell a little story (funny if you do not know her needs and desires). Never just ask questions.
Use silence
I read a post about silence on this page and I do not know if this is added to that post. Silence is a great tool to use. It makes the conversation calm and easy. Using silence can be a little tricky though. You should not always wait a little before saying anything. Sometimes think for a few seconds if it is a tough question. If you are discussing something that you both agree on then saying things hasty is only good because it heightens connection.
Be aware of the other persons mood
Always talk in a slightly similar way as the other person whom you are talking with. If they are sad, add some sadness to your voice, if they are happy, add some happiness or perhaps a little natural smile, as simple as that.
Comments are warmly appreciated!
