Feeling a bit depressed and need help.

[Jmac]

So I know how you guys here say that looks don't mean anything, but that statement isn't all true. Whenever I am with my friends girls tend to approach the "cute" ones. My friend does not even know a thing about talking to girls but yet all these girls just keep throwing themselves at him. Ever since I have been breaking out girls don't really seem interested in me anymore. My breakouts are done but they left behind scars on my face which is not looking good.

How can I get girls if I am not the best looking guy?

 

[eaglez1177]

So I know how you guys here say that looks don't mean anything, but that statement isn't all true. Whenever I am with my friends girls tend to approach the "cute" ones. My friend does not even know a thing about talking to girls but yet all these girls just keep throwing themselves at him. Ever since I have been breaking out girls don't really seem interested in me anymore. My breakouts are done but they left behind scars on my face which is not looking good.

How can I get girls if I am not the best looking guy?

Well first off, anyone who says that looks mean nothing is totally wrong. To an extent, looks do mean something, but they sure as hell are not everything. I'll be willing to bet that although the girls may approach your friend at first, they will very easily be able to tell of his AFCness, and he will be in worse of a boat than you're in.

As long as you're not totally and absolutely hideous (as in like having facial defects from birth or something), the sky will be the limit when it comes to your potential with women.

Theres always a bunch of things you can do to improve your appearance (hygene, hair, clothing, etc). As for your scars, I would absolutely talk to your parents and try to get them to take you to a dermatologist. Scars are not the end of the world and im almost positive that there are numerous methods you can undergo to improve the condition.

You also need to improve your attitude. If your always self conscious about your scars, then girls will notice them more. If you pretend like theyre not even there, then girls wont notice them as much. (Obviously doing this wont make a huge difference but it will help some). Not only that, but you have to get rid of the notion in your head that you're not good looking. Okay we'll be honest, your no Brad Pitt, heck im not and rarely anyone is, but you cant go around with an attitude of "Im not good looking these girls are going to pretend like im not even there and just approach my better looking friend".

 

[freshprince]

Read the dj bible dude if your depressed, it worked for me and its really good so if it worked for me it can work for you too.
eaglez1177 is right ofcourse, i was just going to post something like that when i read your thread, and if you want your scars to go away, i would suggest a cream called cocoa butter formula/proactive its good dude trust me, your not the first to have these facial problems i have been teased about my breakouts
also if your are insecure about the way you look try going to the gym dude, it does help to boost confidence, wear good clothing like eaglez said it helps,you have to see yourself as a prince (take pride in yourself).
peace!

 

[Jmac]

yea Im using this medication to help clear the acne up. Its been recent I started breaking out severly but before it wasn't as much. Also I think I need to use the natural game more that the technical stuff from the DJ bible. I will use the knowledge of the bible but not be so robotic in the way I use my knowledge. A funny story is when I read the article about being a jerk to girls rather than such a nice guy, I tried it and was a complete jerk. Before you know it those girls stopped talking to me =\ guess I over did it.

 

[Jondo]

It's always good to stay healthy. Keep health first. Women is never something anyone should have to worry about. Be confident and satisfied in yourself by staying healthy, Find what you want to do in life, and a fancy woman who wants to join your side in life will come along.

 

[ENIGMA16]

Looks do mean something, as an earlier poster said, but the way women treat it is vastly different to the way guys treat it. I like to sum this up with the simple statement that men primarily initially go for looks and secondarily for personality whereas with girls it's the other way around.

Now, the reason that women "go for" attractive guys like your friend first, is because they don't know anything about your personality so they don't have anything to go on! If you have an awesome personality and your friend has a sh!t one, and they find this out, they'll almost always end up going for you because that's what they're primarily attracted to.

Now, for the scarring, and for your self-consciousness regarding how you look, I can guarantee you that 90% of this issue is due to the fact that you are communicating your insecurity about your looks to women and this is what they are detecting and being turned off by. I've seen pizza faced dudes get mad tail because they just didn't give a **** about it. So you need to change the way you feel about your looks and you need to learn to realize that it doesn't f*cking matter, and that you're just using that as a convenient excuse to blame instead of accepting the fact that you don't have any game. But this should be a good thing to you, because you can change your game much easier than you can your looks; you just have to accept that it's your game that needs work and need to stop blaming your looks.

Now this doesn't mean that you shouldn't try improving your looks, but you need to start from the fact that they matter more to you than to the girls you're going for, and so any attempts at improving your look are being done for the benefit of yourself and not anyone else.

For the scarring, I've found that On-The-Spot helps scarring go away faster (I know, I've been pushing this product like crazy on this forum, but it to me really is f*cking amazing). Also, try sitting with a hot, damp washcloth on your face for 20-30 minutes a day. This opens up your pores, helps your skin breath, and increases the blood flow to your face, which will help the healing process. Plus, it's relaxing as hell. Couple these with the obvious things (showering daily, washing/moisturizing your face, etc...) and you should be able to help minimize the scarring.

 

[Jmac]

Looks do mean something, as an earlier poster said, but the way women treat it is vastly different to the way guys treat it. I like to sum this up with the simple statement that men primarily initially go for looks and secondarily for personality whereas with girls it's the other way around.

Now, the reason that women "go for" attractive guys like your friend first, is because they don't know anything about your personality so they don't have anything to go on! If you have an awesome personality and your friend has a sh!t one, and they find this out, they'll almost always end up going for you because that's what they're primarily attracted to.

Now, for the scarring, and for your self-consciousness regarding how you look, I can guarantee you that 90% of this issue is due to the fact that you are communicating your insecurity about your looks to women and this is what they are detecting and being turned off by. I've seen pizza faced dudes get mad tail because they just didn't give a **** about it. So you need to change the way you feel about your looks and you need to learn to realize that it doesn't f*cking matter, and that you're just using that as a convenient excuse to blame instead of accepting the fact that you don't have any game. But this should be a good thing to you, because you can change your game much easier than you can your looks; you just have to accept that it's your game that needs work and need to stop blaming your looks.

Now this doesn't mean that you shouldn't try improving your looks, but you need to start from the fact that they matter more to you than to the girls you're going for, and so any attempts at improving your look are being done for the benefit of yourself and not anyone else.

For the scarring, I've found that On-The-Spot helps scarring go away faster (I know, I've been pushing this product like crazy on this forum, but it to me really is f*cking amazing). Also, try sitting with a hot, damp washcloth on your face for 20-30 minutes a day. This opens up your pores, helps your skin breath, and increases the blood flow to your face, which will help the healing process. Plus, it's relaxing as hell. Couple these with the obvious things (showering daily, washing/moisturizing your face, etc...) and you should be able to help minimize the scarring.

thats a good point but the thing is that in high school I think girls value
looks more because I have seen guys that had looks and absolutely no game get girls without even trying. most of the good looking Girls in hs won't even want to talk to you like that if you are not good looking because they have "better" options as they say. Its probably different outside of hs.

 

[Coach Marshall]

All Good

Hey, a few of the replies mentioned you need to improve your attitude. That's getting to the core of it. I understand high school girls are all about the external. What you don't realize is that your external is linked directly to your internal state of mind - thoughts, beliefs and emotions.

If you believe you are not attractive, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Just as I believed I was stupid, because of what people told me in elementary school, I somehow found a way to hide my real IQ until my junior year. I then changed my beliefs and became an honors student - after years of getting C's.

You may not realize that you are showing low self-esteem and confidence when you are with the girls. That is a big time repellent to the ladies. Confidence is a big time attractor. I tell ya', if I've seen it once, I've seen 1,000 times - a not so attractive, yet very confident guy, with a hot girlfriend.

Work from the inside out here. Check out my blog, peak achievement coaching, for more info, tips and motivation.