Falling for a friend

[Le killeur]

This is probably the most overasked question on the forum but my problem is above.

Over the past 2 months i have become good friends with a girl at university. However i can notice the tell-tale signs of me falling for her which is unusual due to never letting myself get attached or interested in a girl. Perhaps this is because she is extremely kind, has a good personality and seems gf material (She isnt even that attractive, maybe 6/10 at most). In terms of looks, most would consider her out of my league anyway.

Anyway heres the dilemma, ive never had the opportunity to make a move on her and she is a naturally flirty/touchy person and we also hangout with other guys. (She has hardly any female friends REDFLAG?)

Anyway i understand this is unlikely to happen and i just want to detach myself from her and get rid of feelings for her and go back to viewing her as only a friend.

Any suggestions?

 

[( . )( . )]

Why not see it for what it is. You have oneitis for a sunshine girl, then you can act accordingly, all the resources are here.

edited for reading comprehension failure. (it's late)

http://www.mts.net/~bpony/djbible/

 

[Deep Dish]

Anyway heres the dilemma, ive never had the opportunity to make a move on her and she is a naturally flirty/touchy person and we also hangout with other guys. (She has hardly any female friends REDFLAG?)

http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2011/09/08/judging-a-girl-by-the-friends-she-keeps/

Bookmark it.

 

[Packers2010]

falling or fallen?

just count your lucky stars it's not 8 years like me.

i say, go no contact on her for your own good. there no point going after a girl you have oneitis for just lether go man and talk to some other girls.

 

[st_99]

she is extremely kind, has a good personality she is a naturally flirty/touchy person

The flirty touchy part, especially the touchy part, is why you are "falling" for her. She is flipping your primal switches. Chemicals are starting to flow through your brain, etc etc... I sense you're closing in on infatuation. Bad.

Theoretically its ok because these strong feelings are what drive us to throw caution to the wind and act. but realistically its going to cause you to start acting like a puppy dog and lose any natural coolness or sauve that you may have and turn you into a fool.

So, my advice is to get a hold of yourself and hit on her from a position of strengh and prize mentallity not mushy pedestalization. It turns out that females despise that.

 

[isperatus]

The flirty touchy part, especially the touchy part, is why you are "falling" for her. She is flipping your switches. Chemicals are starting to flow through your brain, etc etc... I sense you're closing in on infatuation. Bad.

Theoretically its ok but realistically its going to cause you to start acting like a puppy dog and lose any natural coolness or sauve that you may have and turn you into a chode.

So, my advice is to get a hold of yourself and hit on her from a position of strengh and prize mentallity not mushy pedestalization.

I think st_99 is right. I had oneitis and currently struggling with one.

Don't give in friend. If you start being overly nice and making all that she sais, like i did, she'll play you and she'll get bored by you. Then she'll start raising her value and test you to see how hard she can squeeze your balls, and see how much freedom does she have with you.
By then your brain would be no help at all and you'll fail all her **** tests. Even the cutest nicest girl can deliver a lot of pain. It wouldn't be her fault because you allowed her to.

I initiated a no contact with the one which was the nicest cutest friend i had. But at the same time she was able to deal a great deal of pain, because i was totally frank and she knew best where to push. Add strong emotional attachment to the soup and you get yourself with several months of bad mood (in the good outcome).
No contact and her whole attitude changed in two days.
Also start dating other women, that helps a lot (doesn't need to be sex with your plates in my opinion but it's better). This gives you confidence (a lot of it !) and also makes your brain think about the bad sides of the girl, the ones that you don't see when you're emotionally into her.

 

[foreverAFC]

get her alone and make a move on her, if she isnt into it move on. save yourself a lot of trouble. trust me, i had an attractive female friend for many years. its really pointless.

 

[Mike32ct]

You want to date her, but your ego won't let you because of her looks.

Either drop the ego and invite her for a drink...

Or if you are sure you don't want to date her...

Read my signature thread. No matter how hot or sweet or kind she is, she is either F-ing or wanting to F some loser lol. When you find out who it is (and you will as friends), she won't seem so attractive anymore.