Hey everyone i need some advice. So my now ex gf and i went to high school together and saw each other some in college but we always had SO's at the time.
We randomly rekindled this past may. We are both 25 now. We talked, had a fun time and we decided to hang out in the city she lives in (3 hour drive). So this turned into us talking a lot and hanging out a lot because i would go to her or she would come home and see her family. Fast forward to July and we became official. We continued to see each other on weekends and always had a blast. Went to weddings, out with friends, fun dates and recently i went to a beach vacation with her family who i get along great with. The long distance has been kinda tough but we talked everyday and saw each other a lot. And now recently i ran into a friend in her area who refered me to a great job. She was skeptical about me moving for her but i really was moving for the opportunity. (i got the job Friday btw which im pumped about)
So here's the tricky part- The weekend before this past one we were eating on Saturday and it got kinda awkward and i could tell something was up. She dated a guy i knew in high school for 6 years and on occasion she will say a story and hes involved. So i told her that i understand hes a big part of her past but its kinda awkward for me when she brings him up. She said she was sorry it was just we were so comfortable that she didn't realize. It honestly doesn't happen a lot and i wish i didn't say anything. He has had a girlfriend for 2 years now and she says she will always have love for him but does not have feelings for him anymore, which i understand because i had an ex of 4 years.
So that night it got awkward and we started to talk when we got home. I asked her how she was feeling and she said i need to be honest with you and said that when im there its perfect but sometimes she has a feeling that something is missing. i kinda sat there in silence and shock. She was crying and said she wants to be with me but i kinda couldnt take it. We ended up having sex which was weird but great, and decided to just talk in the morning. She was VERY emotional.
So the next morning we talk and she gets emotional again. She is apologizing and contradicting herself like crazy. I tell her its unfair to me to put in 100% and not get 100% back and maybe we need to take some time apart. Here's the weird part- We had sex twice and did oral a bunch during this whole process and it was amazing. It was some movie scene type ****. She was freaking out and was saying shes never felt that before and etc. Then the kicker- She's crying and tells me she loves me. Of course i said it back cause i honestly do love her. Shes kinda insecure (sorry it helps to type this out) and was saying that i was perfect and i care so much for her and she has never been cared before like that. So it was very emotional for both of us and i finally mustered up to leave. We were saying i love you and had sex one more time which was the best sex we've both ever had.
So last week was tough. She texted me asking if i got home and i texted her the next day yes. I caved and texted her last Wed and said i was thinking about her and she said ive been thinking about you a lot too. The next day i had my final interview and she texted me that night good luck. I texted her the next day that it went well and she called me to ask how it went. i texted her that night saying it was good talking to her and she replied it was great to hear my voice and we chatted a little bit.
So last Friday i got the call and job offer. I texted her along with every friend and family member i had and she called to congrats and all that jazz. Saturday i text her that i would love to see her Sunday if she wants to get some dinner or drinks. she texts back that she would love to and we got to lunch. It went awesome. We were laughing and she was complimenting me and it felt like we were dating again. She told me she missed me a bunch cause i was cracking jokes and we even talked a little bit about how great the sex was last weekend (she brought it up). So she tells me it was a weird week not talking to me like she was used to and i told her that this past week made me realize that i did want her in my life. She said she missed me so much but needs some time because she is moving this weekend and wants to make sure its right and not rushing off emotions. I told her it was okay as i have a lot going on as well with new job, moving, etc. She said she was so excited for me and that i was moving up there and also said she feels like the job is right for me and is relieved i wasnt moving for her.
So we go and get frozen yogurt and hugs me as we are walking and we kiss some. She tells me she thought about me a lot this week and we kiss more. Eat the froyo and go to my car and make out for awhile. Even get in the car and start getting kinda physical. Her parents were in town helping her move and if not we wouldve definitely went to her house and had sex.
So last night im driving home and she asks if im okay and i say yes and she sends a funny inside joke picture and we text a few times. I put in my 2 weeks at work yesterday and she texted last night saying hey hope it went well today. I texted back the next morning and said it did thanks and we had a few flirtatious texts back and forth.
So thats my story and it felt good to type that out. Really helps you see where you couldve done better in situations. Here's my question though- Whats the best route to take? I dont think there is someone else involved and im willing to give her time. I feel like my best bet is to give her time and space, and only contact her back when she contacts me but be short. Im going up to the city this weekend and was gonna see if she wanted to get dinner Sunday again. Is that dumb?
I am just confused as **** about the whole situation and am now on the fence of fight for her and show her i care but give distance or end it completely and avoid not getting strung along because thats happened to me before and sucks. When we were together sunday it went awesome and during our relationship we got along great and didnt have many fights. Thats whats hard about this along with her texting me a lot and me being available. And when i text her she responds in like 1 min every time. I have talked to some friends (females) about this and they all seem to think she is just scared cause it progressed quick and that i should give distance but keep in touch. Last i heard from her was Tuesday and I'm trying not to contact her and let her come to me but my mind has been in a whirlwind.
Lay it on me guys i know i have acted Beta as ****...
We randomly rekindled this past may. We are both 25 now. We talked, had a fun time and we decided to hang out in the city she lives in (3 hour drive). So this turned into us talking a lot and hanging out a lot because i would go to her or she would come home and see her family. Fast forward to July and we became official. We continued to see each other on weekends and always had a blast. Went to weddings, out with friends, fun dates and recently i went to a beach vacation with her family who i get along great with. The long distance has been kinda tough but we talked everyday and saw each other a lot. And now recently i ran into a friend in her area who refered me to a great job. She was skeptical about me moving for her but i really was moving for the opportunity. (i got the job Friday btw which im pumped about)
So here's the tricky part- The weekend before this past one we were eating on Saturday and it got kinda awkward and i could tell something was up. She dated a guy i knew in high school for 6 years and on occasion she will say a story and hes involved. So i told her that i understand hes a big part of her past but its kinda awkward for me when she brings him up. She said she was sorry it was just we were so comfortable that she didn't realize. It honestly doesn't happen a lot and i wish i didn't say anything. He has had a girlfriend for 2 years now and she says she will always have love for him but does not have feelings for him anymore, which i understand because i had an ex of 4 years.
So that night it got awkward and we started to talk when we got home. I asked her how she was feeling and she said i need to be honest with you and said that when im there its perfect but sometimes she has a feeling that something is missing. i kinda sat there in silence and shock. She was crying and said she wants to be with me but i kinda couldnt take it. We ended up having sex which was weird but great, and decided to just talk in the morning. She was VERY emotional.
So the next morning we talk and she gets emotional again. She is apologizing and contradicting herself like crazy. I tell her its unfair to me to put in 100% and not get 100% back and maybe we need to take some time apart. Here's the weird part- We had sex twice and did oral a bunch during this whole process and it was amazing. It was some movie scene type ****. She was freaking out and was saying shes never felt that before and etc. Then the kicker- She's crying and tells me she loves me. Of course i said it back cause i honestly do love her. Shes kinda insecure (sorry it helps to type this out) and was saying that i was perfect and i care so much for her and she has never been cared before like that. So it was very emotional for both of us and i finally mustered up to leave. We were saying i love you and had sex one more time which was the best sex we've both ever had.
So last week was tough. She texted me asking if i got home and i texted her the next day yes. I caved and texted her last Wed and said i was thinking about her and she said ive been thinking about you a lot too. The next day i had my final interview and she texted me that night good luck. I texted her the next day that it went well and she called me to ask how it went. i texted her that night saying it was good talking to her and she replied it was great to hear my voice and we chatted a little bit.
So last Friday i got the call and job offer. I texted her along with every friend and family member i had and she called to congrats and all that jazz. Saturday i text her that i would love to see her Sunday if she wants to get some dinner or drinks. she texts back that she would love to and we got to lunch. It went awesome. We were laughing and she was complimenting me and it felt like we were dating again. She told me she missed me a bunch cause i was cracking jokes and we even talked a little bit about how great the sex was last weekend (she brought it up). So she tells me it was a weird week not talking to me like she was used to and i told her that this past week made me realize that i did want her in my life. She said she missed me so much but needs some time because she is moving this weekend and wants to make sure its right and not rushing off emotions. I told her it was okay as i have a lot going on as well with new job, moving, etc. She said she was so excited for me and that i was moving up there and also said she feels like the job is right for me and is relieved i wasnt moving for her.
So we go and get frozen yogurt and hugs me as we are walking and we kiss some. She tells me she thought about me a lot this week and we kiss more. Eat the froyo and go to my car and make out for awhile. Even get in the car and start getting kinda physical. Her parents were in town helping her move and if not we wouldve definitely went to her house and had sex.
So last night im driving home and she asks if im okay and i say yes and she sends a funny inside joke picture and we text a few times. I put in my 2 weeks at work yesterday and she texted last night saying hey hope it went well today. I texted back the next morning and said it did thanks and we had a few flirtatious texts back and forth.
So thats my story and it felt good to type that out. Really helps you see where you couldve done better in situations. Here's my question though- Whats the best route to take? I dont think there is someone else involved and im willing to give her time. I feel like my best bet is to give her time and space, and only contact her back when she contacts me but be short. Im going up to the city this weekend and was gonna see if she wanted to get dinner Sunday again. Is that dumb?
I am just confused as **** about the whole situation and am now on the fence of fight for her and show her i care but give distance or end it completely and avoid not getting strung along because thats happened to me before and sucks. When we were together sunday it went awesome and during our relationship we got along great and didnt have many fights. Thats whats hard about this along with her texting me a lot and me being available. And when i text her she responds in like 1 min every time. I have talked to some friends (females) about this and they all seem to think she is just scared cause it progressed quick and that i should give distance but keep in touch. Last i heard from her was Tuesday and I'm trying not to contact her and let her come to me but my mind has been in a whirlwind.
Lay it on me guys i know i have acted Beta as ****...
