Ever have moral issues?

[topdog3853]

Hey guys. Question. Everybody is here for different reasons whether it be to find a good LTR or just to get laid, whatever. The bottom line is to get better with women. Well I have definitely have. Well here's a story but would you guys go for it. One of the new chicks I'm dating is all about my sh*t, you can just tell. Well the bottom line is I an not totally attracted to her. I know I could get her into bed, but I dont' know if I want to because I don't know if I want the emotional baggage from her that my come along with it. She doesnt' know that one of the other girls I'm dating I am much more into than her. The key is do I keep her around for fun and social prof in case the other thing doesn't work out, or do I send her packing. The problem is I not one of those guys who feels like by DJing a woman it is manipulative but I also have a moral dilemma now because I dont' want to f**k a girl over that I am not really attracted to. Its not that she is an UG or anything just one of those you know would click for me in the long run. I guess the only thing I can think of to do is to say that I am not looking for a relationship right up front before sex may happen? Any responses?

 

[Mr. Mystery]

Morals aren't something I think we should get into here since its a subject that would go nowhere.

But if it was me, I would decide whether I wanted sex with the no interest girl and if so, I would be HONEST with her and tell her I am interested in sex but no relationship and tell her what that entails. All the while still seeing the other girl.

Thats my take on it, but you and I may have different morals...

Mr. Mystery

 

[Kwah]

I have moral's coming out my ass. God they get on my nerves most of the time.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Personally, this situation isn't about morals... there's degress of morals you can have. If ya worried about morals, truly, yo ass would wait till ya got married to bang her... so.... lets put morals to the side here.... she likes you, so how do you know that maybe all she wants is a nice romp in the sheets? Before I got in a LTR, this was, believe it or not, normal. They are called 'f*ck buddies'. You will probably get them throughout your life. It all depends how you look at 'em..... whatever you do, make sure you pick wisely. If she looks like she's got potential, give her a shot.... if not, don't give it another thought. Good luck...

 

[Oscar Wilde]

Originally posted by InLawsHateMe
If ya worried about morals, truly, yo ass would wait till ya got married to bang her...

No, I disagree ILHM. Others religous beliefs have nothing to do with my morals, abstenance before marriage is unnatural to me, and I'd be very worried about the stability of said marriage if it was the case. Your case is a false generalisation at the very least.

But yes, I do have some important morals (one of which I feel I have violated to a small degree lately, I feel terrible about that). My conscience kills me sometimes, I give myself some terrible guilt trips which I don't deserve at times, but that's life.

In this case, I would tell the girl the deal just like Mystery there. In fact, I'm in exactly this situation this week, and that's what I planned to do.

Osc.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Originally posted by Oscar Wilde
No, I disagree ILHM. Others religous beliefs have nothing to do with my morals....
But yes, I do have some important morals (one of which I feel I have violated to a small degree lately, I feel terrible about that). My conscience kills me sometimes, I give myself some terrible guilt trips which I don't deserve at times, but that's life.

In this case, I would tell the girl the deal just like Mystery there. In fact, I'm in exactly this situation this week, and that's what I planned to do.

Osc.

I'm sorry, I thought I was answering Topdogs question, not yours Oscar... *shrugs*

Like I said, PERSONALLY , to me, it has nothing to do with morals.... by your reply of 'abstenance before marriage is unnatural to me', you would in fact, be agreeing to my original post.... *shrugs*

You also said, "Your case is a false generalisation at the very least."

This is the same generalisation that has been used when the topic of sex out of wedlock, and morals come about in many discussions in the past. This isn't something new Oscar, and as much as you want to give me the credit for it, I didn't start it.

Just like you tainted your morals 'recently' that your not very proud of, yet you don't really say what it was.... well, some can say your case of morals is a false generalisation... but like myself, I'm sure you were speaking personally, which is not for me to say, it was wrong....

Top was talking about him dealing with HIS personal morals... this chic likes him, but he doesn't like her enough to bang her, he feels there's a degree of morals into play here... which is his personal level.... to me, it's nothing more than two people, one wants to have sex, one doesn't.

 

[Oscar Wilde]

Originally posted by InLawsHateMe
I'm sorry, I thought I was answering Topdogs question, not yours Oscar... *shrugs*

"If ya worried about morals, truly, yo ass would wait till ya got married to bang her..." is a very general statement to be fair... * shrugs*

Originally posted by InLawsHateMe

Like I said, PERSONALLY , to me, it has nothing to do with morals.... by your reply of 'abstenance before marriage is unnatural to me', you would in fact, be agreeing to my original post.... *shrugs*

I do, in fact, agree with your original posts. Well, not the bit I quoted above, but the rest of it I do. But since the subject was morals I just wanted to point out that this has nothing to do with morals, at least for some people.

Originally posted by InLawsHateMe

Just like you tainted your morals 'recently' that your not very proud of, yet you don't really say what it was.... well, some can say your case of morals is a false generalisation... but like myself, I'm sure you were speaking personally, which is not to say, it was wrong....

Yeah, unfortunately I do really say what it was, go check out the FB thread. I violated the bros before ho's rule. And I am not proud.

Damn women.

Well, I guess we are both in agreement, funny argument, but there you go. Be cool.
Oscar.

 

[princelydeeds]

Life is short. I would bone her then be nice but a little distant afterward. Dont call her the next day but remain a gentleman. Keep it light and fun. Stay cool, but get yours. She'll get teh hint but I think its ok for you to have sum fun.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Originally posted by Oscar Wilde
"If ya worried about morals, truly, yo ass would wait till ya got married to bang her..." is a very general statement to be fair... * shrugs* Oscar.

...if ya got issues with something as 'general' as whether to f*ck a chic because you have certain morals that prevent you from doing anyone you don't like as much, maybe you should step back and really ask yourself how much, are you REALLY concerned about morals? What if she was a hot babe? Some of us will check our morals at the door for a hot babe. Why bring morals into this? So you can feel bad later? C'mon!!!

How fair can a brotha get there? LOL!! I know sometimes it's harder to type everything out so EVERYONE can understand clearly but.... I am but one. I mean, I suggested to Top's 'general' question with an answer that pretty much says, 'Hey, do what you feel, but don't hold yourself back from having a good time because you think it's morals, you may regret it later.'

Morals for some of us *cough ~OSCAR~ cough* sometimes is a mental crutch, cleverly disguised as an excuse.

'Oh I f*cked my bud's old gf, I broke the 'hoes before bros' rule, I feel really bad now.' LOL!!! ......not to single you out Oscar but, how's that for generalizing?

Morals, which is what Topdog is looking for..... like I said before, depending on your degree of personal understanding, can either be a symbol of weakness, or strength to you.





*shrugs*

 

[topdog3853]

Well sorry to get you two guys into it here. The only reason why I haven't given her the leathal beef injection is because I know what it feels like to be f**ked over. I only want the sex but I am pretty sure she wants more than that. Now if I'm upfront with her then it probably wont happen, but if I'm not upfront with her then I'll be f**king her over later. I know how that feels from the AFC days, but now I try and tell myself WTF do I care? But I feel it is somewhat wrong doing this to someone else.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Originally posted by topdog3853
Well sorry to get you two guys into it here. The only reason why I haven't given her the leathal beef injection is because I know what it feels like to be f**ked over. I only want the sex but I am pretty sure she wants more than that. Now if I'm upfront with her then it probably wont happen, but if I'm not upfront with her then I'll be f**king her over later. I know how that feels from the AFC days, but now I try and tell myself WTF do I care? But I feel it is somewhat wrong doing this to someone else.

Top, so someone onced used you for sex, and you feel tainted by this? ......brooooooooooooooooooo.

Welp, it's up to you.... you can talk it over with her, tell her 'You know, I like you.... and I think you like me too (whatever) ....but we're both young, and my life is such a mess right now, the last thing I want is to drag someone I like into this clusterf*ck that is my life.... do you understand? ......still, you give me the hardest boner. Lets have sex." ..or something a long those lines...

I think if the chic was hotter than hell, you'd be all over her like buzzard Top, tell me you wouldn't....

In any case, ya only live once, life is too short, have a good time, so long as you don't kill no one, lets get on with it already.

Sometimes bud, it's better to try, than regret not trying later, but whatever you want to do, it's up to you... I don't know how hard pressed you are for some donkey punch.

 

[Oscar Wilde]

Hmm, not sure where we're going with that one ILHM, so I'll just leave it there. I posted about my violation for you to read all about, and yes, I do feel terrible about it, which sucks, but I deserve it.

Top, I actually agree with what the guy is saying so I don't quite understand the argument, text is insufficient for communication sometimes. I think that you should decide for yourself which way to go. I am in a similar situation with Nicki (see Field Report), where I like the girl, but am not into a relationship. I think she's mad about me. So next time I see her I'll have to explain to her what I see happening. If she then still wants to sleep with me, that's cool. If not, I'll still hang out with the girl, if she don't mind.

That's where it's at for me.
Osc.

 

[topdog3853]

I gotch INHM. I didn't mean someone ever used me for sex. Personnaly I wouldn't give a sh*t about that. I'm a man and I like to have sex, period. What I mean is that I have just been F**ked over in general when I wanted something more out of a relationship but she didn't. Of course that was the past and I am much wiser now. Alright forget about it. I'm going to get this over with, tonight or tomorrow night shall be the night. I'll report back. Hopefully an fluid ounce or two lighter.

 

[InLawsHateMe]

Originally posted by topdog3853
I gotch INHM. I didn't mean someone ever used me for sex. Personnaly I wouldn't give a sh*t about that. I'm a man and I like to have sex, period. What I mean is that I have just been F**ked over in general when I wanted something more out of a relationship but she didn't. Of course that was the past and I am much wiser now. Alright forget about it. I'm going to get this over with, tonight or tomorrow night shall be the night. I'll report back. Hopefully an fluid ounce or two lighter.

LOL!! Top, have fun with it, seriously... as crazy as it may sound, some really good friendships come from one-nighters! (So long as both are aware that it's just out of sheer horniness)

Say 'Lets really kick off this summer RIGHT!' and 'I'm going to do you so hard, you're gonna walk funny for two weeks, and it's going to be funny watching you walk.' Look at it as nothing more than f*ck buddies.... if it works out right, you'll have no commitments, and all summer long to find strange and odd places to f*ck.' ... wear a condom.