Ever dated a woman with big student loan debts?

[MatureDJ]

I've been reading various articles about how the young folks of this generation are taking out massive student loans - especially now, since college (especially private) is so expensive these days. Frequently, it is the coeds that get into these large debt situations as young women especially have no concept of money, and are apt to study personally fulfilling, but not marketable courses of study (and even if they did study something marketable, the economy is the sh!ts now ...)

And student loans are non-dischargeable in bankruptcy. I myself am going to be filing Chapter 7, wiping away $140K in unsecured debt, so I can understand how bad it would be to have a huge debt burden that keeps growing.

But I wonder if anyone has ever dated a woman with such huge debts, and thought about the financial consequences if he would consider marriage. Gosh, I think I would run away from a woman with any sizable debt. (As I only date women from Eastern Europe, debt is not a problem.)

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

A friend of mine, then and now, a huge AFC married a woman with substantial debt. That was about 20 years ago. He said it was the worst financial decision he's ever made. Even though he's now earning well into six figures, every single increase in income he's made, she's made a concomitant increase in spending.

If she has debt when you marry her, she'll have debt ten, twenty or fifty years later.

Think of being in debt as like being really fat. If she's fat now, she's gonna be fat later. If your OK with that, then go ahead and get married.

You may think that student loans don't "count" as they are a once in a lifetime deal, but what is her degree in? Is it something that can get her a good paying job that will pay off the debt? Or did she incur a lot of student loans to get a good "experience" of college while getting some useless degree?

How she shops for college will be the same way she shops for houses, cars, kids. (my aforementioned friend's wife spends a TON of of money on useless crap for the kids)

Up to you.

 

[joekerr31]

would you date a woman missing a leg?
would you date a woman with herpes?
would you date a woman who had a mastectomy?

large debt, like the things above, are burdens that will impact your life.

Actually, to be honest, a woman with a large amount of debt presents MORE burdens than any of the other scenarios I mentioned.

I'd be more apt to date a woman with no leg, boobs or with herpes than with large amounts of debt.

I mean, a woman with no debt isn't even that great at my age. I want a woman who has at least SOME net worth built up.

But i avoid women who have debt... or who exhibit excessive spending patterns.... because I'll tell you this... I work damn hard for my money and any chic that thinks I'm going to use it to 'bail out' her lifetime of irresponsible spending is nuts.

the only time debt would be ok would be if she had accrued it while becoming a lawyer or doctor or something.

 

[synergy1]

Frequently, it is the coeds that get into these large debt situations as young women especially have no concept of money, and are apt to study personally fulfilling, but not marketable courses of study (and even if they did study something marketable, the economy is the sh!ts now ...)

And student loans are non-dischargeable in bankruptcy. I myself am going to be filing Chapter 7, wiping away $140K in unsecured debt, so I can understand how bad it would be to have a huge debt burden that keeps growing.

Odd I know a lot of women who are obviously more capable of handling money. One of my friends back home had saved enough to buy her first car with cash, worked all through college as a waitress and can support herself for a couple of years without a job if need be. I would even go as far to point out that my own mother had pretty good financial I.Q as she has managed to retire before virtually every one of my friends parents at the same age.

How did you get 100k into the hole? unexpected medical bills or just poor life choices? You knock on women's inability to spend, yet you are half of a house in the hole yourself?

 

[MatureDJ]

How did you get 100k into the hole? unexpected medical bills or just poor life choices? You knock on women's inability to spend, yet you are half of a house in the hole yourself?

Hurricane Katrina (fronting some costs that I thought I would be able to refinance with a super cheap government loan), inability to restart my computer consulting business because of the cheap foreign computer programmers flooding the market, some huge capital losses in the stock market ...

Besides, my debt is dischargeable. The student loans are not. This is not a knock on women being spendthrift - just that they may have huge student debt.

 

[synergy1]

Hurricane Katrina (fronting some costs that I thought I would be able to refinance with a super cheap government loan), inability to restart my computer consulting business because of the cheap foreign computer programmers flooding the market, some huge capital losses in the stock market ...

Really sorry to hear that. While we may fundamentally disagree about women's spending habits, its no excuse for disrespecting your situation in my other post without knowing all the details. My apologies.

 

[backbreaker]

the girl that brought me here had about 50k in stdent loans and another 20k in medical bills from a kidney problem she had.

the guy she married had spotless credit..like 810-820 credit.

a few months ago she whined about getting a new mercdedes suv until he broke down and did it for her to shut her up. their having to go on vacations and go out to eat 2-3 nights a week... on about a combined 50k-55k salary a year, is hurting.


better him than me lol..


not so much debt.. debt can be good, espically if you have invested in bettering yourself (school and you busted your ass in school for instance.. i have no problem with.. the girl that has had 3 majors in 5 years.. i have a problem with).. medical bills I'm iffy about. sometimes you just can't help it and hell.. you get sick sometimes.


a simple solution to all those problems are to make yourself 100% clear and do not bend; aint' **** happening until you are debt free.

my dad now that I am older, I find out has spotless credit, as does his mom.. my mom's side of the family, who raised me, has very bad credit.. well my mom doesn't have bad credit but it's below avg. if she had to buy something on credit she could but a higher inters rate.

needless to say when i entered the real world I had no idea about the world of credit becuase my mom and her mom didn't. I thought the world of credit revolved around BK's (my grandmother has filed 4bk's) and my mom has filed 2... so I learned what good credit could do and it took me a while but now my credit is above 750...

my fiancee had some pretty high credit card balances.. like 10-13 k (for her high at least) and her utilization was like at 75%. I made the passing comment to her that I dot marry into debt one day.. I knew she was getting serious about marriage when she paid her CC off.


women (and men for the most part) have no idea about credit. to say it's just women that have no idea is being naive.

 

[joekerr31]

there's an old saying... 'failure to plan, is planning to fail.'

people with debt, more often than not, simply fail to plan in life. they live in the moment (in a bad way) and always think that something will take care of their problems down the road.

find me a woman with good credit and odds are you are looking at a woman who will nurture your relationship... just like she does with her credit.

find a woman who doesn't value money... and she probably won't value you much either.

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

Half of people that graduate from college never pay back their student loans.

 

[mrRuckus]

I just read this and thought of this thread.

http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/women-caused-the-subprime-meltdown