So over the summer, i have managed to escape from the friend zone of this one girl. after that, we lost contact for a few months and i started talking to her a couple of days ago. one night she asked me if i want to be her partner for this skit that she's performing in and i said sure. it was outta nowhere! maybe she's beginning to take an interest in me? We'll see. But for now, we rarely talk anymore, only during school and recently she's beginning to ask what i'm doing (like over the weekend) and stuff. This is so much different than when i was in her *friend zone. I want to work things out with her now, and make sure that i don't screw up again. So will anyone here advice?
Escaped from friend zone
- Thread starter Oni
- Start date
six-foot AZN '05
Don Juan
hey man. good job. yeh just wanna say that im in the same boat. after puttin on some kino and gettin hot, my friend melted into my gf. now she just wants 2 hang w/ me but i try to keep the suspense + distance
Don't be so sure, tread your ground carefully man. I am thinking about attempting an escape from a long forgotten LJBF relationship (and by long forgotten I mean long forgotten in high school time, which is a few months). If I ever hear that the girl that LJBFed me a while ago before I dove into the ways of DJism brakes up with her current boyfriend I just might go after her. Of course that is on the backburner while I'm getting other girls, LJBF girl has a nice body but the fact that there still are reminisces of all the ideas I had anchored onto her (making her my girlfriend sybolized me becoming the person I always wanted to be, and have now become via DJism) makes it a tricky thing to do.
It's a good thing that you've gotten out of the FZ.Just thinking that you're out of the FZ is half the job done,actually.Most of us think that we're close to the girl because we're her friend,and sooner or later she'll see our inner man whom she'd love.It never happens.Don't ever think you're her friend.
Well,firstly,just don't always be there for her.Drop her a call maybe once a week,and if she calls you,pick it up,talk for a minute,and say that you've gotta run.
Secondly,get to know a lot of hot girls and talk to them while she is around.Treat these girls just the same way you'd treat this ex-friend of yours.Hey,you don't wanna fall into one-itis and its always good to know hot girls.Don't become their friend either!
Thirdly,play around with this girl.Be kind to her for a day and then ignore her for another.This would make her wonder why you're ignoring her.Just dont make it a routine,keep it like kind for a day or two then ignore for 3 or 4 days or vice versa.Just mix them up,they all work.
There's a really good article about this situation though, surely you'd like to check it out.I think it's called 'Girl-friend or Girlfriend'..But I dont clearly remember.
Well,firstly,just don't always be there for her.Drop her a call maybe once a week,and if she calls you,pick it up,talk for a minute,and say that you've gotta run.
Secondly,get to know a lot of hot girls and talk to them while she is around.Treat these girls just the same way you'd treat this ex-friend of yours.Hey,you don't wanna fall into one-itis and its always good to know hot girls.Don't become their friend either!
Thirdly,play around with this girl.Be kind to her for a day and then ignore her for another.This would make her wonder why you're ignoring her.Just dont make it a routine,keep it like kind for a day or two then ignore for 3 or 4 days or vice versa.Just mix them up,they all work.
There's a really good article about this situation though, surely you'd like to check it out.I think it's called 'Girl-friend or Girlfriend'..But I dont clearly remember.
Yea.
Right now, i'm just trying to spark an attraction. My convo skill isnt that great and my C/F skills can either suck or works well at times. So far what i really want is to ask her to the prom. When i asked her last year, she said no because we were "too close" of a friend. Now, i THINK things are different. I was just going to straight out ask her but everyone seems to be coming up with something creative to ask their date to the prom with. How frustrating :nervous: I just want to go up to her and ask her straight out!! BUt now i'm still planning...drawing a blueprint
Does anyone wnat to advice?
So ..
Goal 1: Spark an attraction
I think i'll turn this into a journal..
Right now, i'm just trying to spark an attraction. My convo skill isnt that great and my C/F skills can either suck or works well at times. So far what i really want is to ask her to the prom. When i asked her last year, she said no because we were "too close" of a friend. Now, i THINK things are different. I was just going to straight out ask her but everyone seems to be coming up with something creative to ask their date to the prom with. How frustrating :nervous: I just want to go up to her and ask her straight out!! BUt now i'm still planning...drawing a blueprint
Does anyone wnat to advice?So ..
Goal 1: Spark an attraction
I think i'll turn this into a journal..
There's something I didn't add in my post so I'd do it now,and you have to be careful of this.
Do you think,in any way,the girl considers you more of her brother than anything else,even though you've started the ways of DJ? I mean,are we talking about a girl who'd say to you when you bang a girl,'Im really so happy for you' and mean it?
If it is,then you cannot spark an attraction.I remember reading an article that said its important to know that the girl who's LJBFed you doesn't consider you as her brother now.This usually happens if you become her friend for too long a time.
I'd have to agree to AB500, tread your grounds carefully.Don't make the mistake of not talking to other girls and seeing them as potential lovers when you're courting this one girl.That would ruin you.
Do you think,in any way,the girl considers you more of her brother than anything else,even though you've started the ways of DJ? I mean,are we talking about a girl who'd say to you when you bang a girl,'Im really so happy for you' and mean it?
If it is,then you cannot spark an attraction.I remember reading an article that said its important to know that the girl who's LJBFed you doesn't consider you as her brother now.This usually happens if you become her friend for too long a time.
I'd have to agree to AB500, tread your grounds carefully.Don't make the mistake of not talking to other girls and seeing them as potential lovers when you're courting this one girl.That would ruin you.
She use to be my one-itis, but not anymore. Currently I'm talking to a couple of other girls as well. I remembered once i was flirting with a girl and the class bell rang, she pulled me away form that girl and rushed me off to class telling me im going to be late. Also, i don't think she considers me as a "brother" type because she tends to be shy around me. That was what i observed because when she's around other guy friends, she seemed more open whereas if i'm there, she has a hard time keeping eye contact and speaking with me directly... Furthermore, she is the quiet type of girl, but she is really playful only with her girl friends. As of right now i still have no game plan .. but today my friends and i are gonna go out to eat and she along with her friend are coming along as well. It's going to be an interesting thing because we are going to try some of the spiciest hot wings in our area for fun, i'm trying to think of something to do that will stand out. After, we might chill and play a little bball, that's her favorite sport and we used to play together al the time back then, but now i'm trying to come up with something different as well. What do you guys think :woo:
It's gonna be obvious a lot of my guy friends are gonna ****block and be the ones that standout. In the past i just let them do it because i didnt care, but that was a mistake. I dont want to let it happen again. I'm normally a quiet guy but i dont wnat that anymore.
.. but today my friends and i are gonna go out to eat and she along with her friend are coming along as well. It's going to be an interesting thing because we are going to try some of the spiciest hot wings in our area for fun, i'm trying to think of something to do that will stand out. After, we might chill and play a little bball, that's her favorite sport and we used to play together al the time back then, but now i'm trying to come up with something different as well. What do you guys think :woo:It's gonna be obvious a lot of my guy friends are gonna ****block and be the ones that standout. In the past i just let them do it because i didnt care, but that was a mistake. I dont want to let it happen again. I'm normally a quiet guy but i dont wnat that anymore.
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If your friends are gonna be **** blocking you all over the place (I have a friend that does this a lot.. pain in the ass sometimes) then don't take the girl out with them. Invite her to something where only you and her hang out, here are two of my favorite activitys I like doing with chicks that don't cost much:
-Watch old movies together, the really corny movies of the 70s and earilier, horror movies are great.
-Go ice/roller skating, this works great if your any good at it and she's not, you can get some kino in by balencing her and helping her out.
If she tries to bring friends along with you then it's not a good sign but not nessasarly a bad one ethier. The fact she pulled you away from the hot chick is good, make sure she has to do it more often, in fact make it so bad that anytime she wants to talk to you you will be in the middle of talking to some good looking chick/deeply involved in one of your amazingly interesting hobbies. If you have to go out with friends make sure you show them who's in control, not verbally but just stand out.. as much as I hate saying it due to the fact the words are plastered all over this site "be the alpha-male".
-Watch old movies together, the really corny movies of the 70s and earilier, horror movies are great.
-Go ice/roller skating, this works great if your any good at it and she's not, you can get some kino in by balencing her and helping her out.
If she tries to bring friends along with you then it's not a good sign but not nessasarly a bad one ethier. The fact she pulled you away from the hot chick is good, make sure she has to do it more often, in fact make it so bad that anytime she wants to talk to you you will be in the middle of talking to some good looking chick/deeply involved in one of your amazingly interesting hobbies. If you have to go out with friends make sure you show them who's in control, not verbally but just stand out.. as much as I hate saying it due to the fact the words are plastered all over this site "be the alpha-male".
ok...i mastered getting out of the friend zone with this hb9...if u wanna know how to get out of the friend zone here is how.
This chick wanted me but i had no clue what to do lol. she touched my legs, shoulders, etc. all the right signs.
for the last 3 months of 8th grade i was torchered by her, as we all were. through the whole summer i suffered. and into freshman year. all i could do the first 2 months of freshman year was think about her. much to my disappointment, she wasnt in any of my classes, and i never saw her. this was awful, but it was good for me because it taught me to live without her. by january i had gotten over her and moved on and gotten oneitis for another chick(not even close as bad lol)
so i didnt see or talk to her until april i think. that was when she hit my shoulder after passing her in the hallway. after school that day we small talked for 5 minutes or so. this happened a couple times as the school year finished.
well onto sophmore year now. shes in 2 of my classes. not knowing how to treat her, i simply avoid ALL contact with her. even eye contact, which was difficult cuz she sat facing me on the other side of the room. anyway eventually we would make eye contact once passing in the hallways and once walking into class, both times which she smiled.
so we hadnt conversed in about 5 months now. a very tight relationship jk lol. so we were switching seats in class and i now sit facing her at our table. its quiet for 5 minutes until she accidently touches my foot. she looks up and says sorry with a smile. i say,"someone likes to play with my feet." she laughs. after that she was writing on my folders. also she kept rubbing her legs against mine under the table. it was like we were starting all over
a couple weeks pass and im at our football game. im walking in to meet up with my boys. im walking and someone gives me a light hit on the shoulder. it was her.
a couple more weeks pass and i was at the varsity hoops game. im on the jv team and we just played. at halftime of the game im sitting in the bleechers she comes up and grabs my leg and tells me i played really good. i hardly even played and she told me i played great.
at this point im just thinking, ya whatever she prolly wants me but im over her. my plan here is to keep letting her initiate. at this point i have done zero initiating.
so after one of our games im waiting outside for a ride and she comes out and gives me a hug(awwwww) and we chat for a few and she leaves.
a few days later im walking in the hallway at school and she comes running up to talk to me. i accused her of spending 2 hours on her hair in the morning. she liked the teasing. later that day she asked me when she walked into our second class how long i spend on my hair. i just answered and kinda played it low.
then came semi formal. she came up to me when we grinded(she even initiated when we danced) so we grind for a while and later she grabbed my ass when she walked by. things are goin real good now
the next week she wasnt in school. but the week after in our first class together, she says hi from across the room. in our second class, she came up to me for answers on an assignment. point being, i sit across the class from her and she came up to me when she coulda got answers from someone closer.
2 days later(we have alternating classes every day) she came up to me and asked me if i had a quarter. im like,"no". i offer to give her a piece of gum for an air head. she takes the gum and im like well wheres my air head. shes like "i just wanted a quarter" laughing. im like, "well give me the gum back" and she just seductively licks the gum. im like "o you slut" with my voice trailing off. this really got her cracking up and she went back to her seat
2 days later after 3rd period she was walking behind me with this hb10. the hb10 asks me what happened to my hand. before i could answer she interrupts me and says, "he cut it open at basketball" and she comes running up and wraps both of her arms around my arm.
well this is where it ended. i told someone what i said to her at the semi prior to grindin with her and he told some people, who told some people, and it got out. eventually it got around to her right after she went the opposite way of me after holding my arm. theres an intersection in the school. i was going left, she was going right and right when we turned left i saw this kid going down the same way as her and i knew it was over. he was the one giving me the most **** for what i said to her. obviously he told her cuz after that she really didnt talk to me much.
anyway, at first i was kinda angry at him, wanting to fight him. i got home and thought after i went out one friday. i wanted to get really pissed, but i didnt. i was just waiting for the anger to set in, but it never did. i didnt really care. was i happy? not at all. but i really didnt care too much. it didnt take long for the little anger i had aimed at him to refocus on her. what kind of a shallow b!tch changes her view of a guy based on what someone else told her? definitely NOT someone i want to get involved with.
so i thought about trying to explain to her what the deal was. then i just said to myself that im just gonna move on, and if she wants to follow, she can. i kept telling myself that im better off without her. so its been i think 3 weeks or so since he snitched on me, and for the first 2 weeks i pretty much didnt talk to her. my gameplan from the beginning of the school year was to let her initiate, and im sticking to it. this past monday we were moving around to work in groups made up by the teacher, she came up to my desk and smiled. im like, "you workin with me?' she says no and im like "o sucks to be you" she giggled. later that class she was sitting behind me while i was standing slightly in front of her and she was copying something off of one of the posters. i just wave my hand in front of her view and she smiles.
2 days later i was looking back at my friend and i noticed she started looking at me(she sits next to me). a few seconds later i face her and shes smiling and she just says hi.
friday i said something that i thought was not intended to be funny and she was the only one who laughed.
so thats where it stands. my advice to all you tryin to get out of the friendzone. simple...she has to initiate EVERYTHING.
ill let yall know how it goes with her. gameplan is to keep ignoring her. let her come back.
This chick wanted me but i had no clue what to do lol. she touched my legs, shoulders, etc. all the right signs.
for the last 3 months of 8th grade i was torchered by her, as we all were. through the whole summer i suffered. and into freshman year. all i could do the first 2 months of freshman year was think about her. much to my disappointment, she wasnt in any of my classes, and i never saw her. this was awful, but it was good for me because it taught me to live without her. by january i had gotten over her and moved on and gotten oneitis for another chick(not even close as bad lol)
so i didnt see or talk to her until april i think. that was when she hit my shoulder after passing her in the hallway. after school that day we small talked for 5 minutes or so. this happened a couple times as the school year finished.
well onto sophmore year now. shes in 2 of my classes. not knowing how to treat her, i simply avoid ALL contact with her. even eye contact, which was difficult cuz she sat facing me on the other side of the room. anyway eventually we would make eye contact once passing in the hallways and once walking into class, both times which she smiled.
so we hadnt conversed in about 5 months now. a very tight relationship jk lol. so we were switching seats in class and i now sit facing her at our table. its quiet for 5 minutes until she accidently touches my foot. she looks up and says sorry with a smile. i say,"someone likes to play with my feet." she laughs. after that she was writing on my folders. also she kept rubbing her legs against mine under the table. it was like we were starting all over
a couple weeks pass and im at our football game. im walking in to meet up with my boys. im walking and someone gives me a light hit on the shoulder. it was her.
a couple more weeks pass and i was at the varsity hoops game. im on the jv team and we just played. at halftime of the game im sitting in the bleechers she comes up and grabs my leg and tells me i played really good. i hardly even played and she told me i played great.
at this point im just thinking, ya whatever she prolly wants me but im over her. my plan here is to keep letting her initiate. at this point i have done zero initiating.
so after one of our games im waiting outside for a ride and she comes out and gives me a hug(awwwww) and we chat for a few and she leaves.
a few days later im walking in the hallway at school and she comes running up to talk to me. i accused her of spending 2 hours on her hair in the morning. she liked the teasing. later that day she asked me when she walked into our second class how long i spend on my hair. i just answered and kinda played it low.
then came semi formal. she came up to me when we grinded(she even initiated when we danced) so we grind for a while and later she grabbed my ass when she walked by. things are goin real good now
the next week she wasnt in school. but the week after in our first class together, she says hi from across the room. in our second class, she came up to me for answers on an assignment. point being, i sit across the class from her and she came up to me when she coulda got answers from someone closer.
2 days later(we have alternating classes every day) she came up to me and asked me if i had a quarter. im like,"no". i offer to give her a piece of gum for an air head. she takes the gum and im like well wheres my air head. shes like "i just wanted a quarter" laughing. im like, "well give me the gum back" and she just seductively licks the gum. im like "o you slut" with my voice trailing off. this really got her cracking up and she went back to her seat
2 days later after 3rd period she was walking behind me with this hb10. the hb10 asks me what happened to my hand. before i could answer she interrupts me and says, "he cut it open at basketball" and she comes running up and wraps both of her arms around my arm.
well this is where it ended. i told someone what i said to her at the semi prior to grindin with her and he told some people, who told some people, and it got out. eventually it got around to her right after she went the opposite way of me after holding my arm. theres an intersection in the school. i was going left, she was going right and right when we turned left i saw this kid going down the same way as her and i knew it was over. he was the one giving me the most **** for what i said to her. obviously he told her cuz after that she really didnt talk to me much.
anyway, at first i was kinda angry at him, wanting to fight him. i got home and thought after i went out one friday. i wanted to get really pissed, but i didnt. i was just waiting for the anger to set in, but it never did. i didnt really care. was i happy? not at all. but i really didnt care too much. it didnt take long for the little anger i had aimed at him to refocus on her. what kind of a shallow b!tch changes her view of a guy based on what someone else told her? definitely NOT someone i want to get involved with.
so i thought about trying to explain to her what the deal was. then i just said to myself that im just gonna move on, and if she wants to follow, she can. i kept telling myself that im better off without her. so its been i think 3 weeks or so since he snitched on me, and for the first 2 weeks i pretty much didnt talk to her. my gameplan from the beginning of the school year was to let her initiate, and im sticking to it. this past monday we were moving around to work in groups made up by the teacher, she came up to my desk and smiled. im like, "you workin with me?' she says no and im like "o sucks to be you" she giggled. later that class she was sitting behind me while i was standing slightly in front of her and she was copying something off of one of the posters. i just wave my hand in front of her view and she smiles.
2 days later i was looking back at my friend and i noticed she started looking at me(she sits next to me). a few seconds later i face her and shes smiling and she just says hi.
friday i said something that i thought was not intended to be funny and she was the only one who laughed.
so thats where it stands. my advice to all you tryin to get out of the friendzone. simple...she has to initiate EVERYTHING.
ill let yall know how it goes with her. gameplan is to keep ignoring her. let her come back.
i would do that and start ignoring her, but only to an extend. but time is very limited at the moment, prom is 2 months away from now and im planning on asking her. so i have to make sure i am doing everything right. she talked to me once about how shes saving up for prom, not sure if that means anything.
six-foot AZN '05
Don Juan
For the prom date I got on my computer and then sosuave.com. I thought about how much time I would want to invest in this relationship and how much time she should be thinking about me. So I made a puzzle in about 2 hours that told her to go with me to prom. It was perfect, I spent time making it, she spent more time and brains breaking it. I think it was much better than giving flowers or cards because all those are one way things.Oni said:Yea.
Right now, i'm just trying to spark an attraction. My convo skill isnt that great and my C/F skills can either suck or works well at times. So far what i really want is to ask her to the prom. When i asked her last year, she said no because we were "too close" of a friend. Now, i THINK things are different. I was just going to straight out ask her but everyone seems to be coming up with something creative to ask their date to the prom with. How frustrating :nervous: I just want to go up to her and ask her straight out!! BUt now i'm still planning...drawing a blueprint
So ..
Goal 1: Spark an attraction
I think i'll turn this into a journal..
someone did that at our school already, it was really nice. but i dont know yet, so far i have a couple girls in mind and shes the first on the list. when it comes to this things, i'm not that creative... and it's hard to get some alone time with her. I just wanted to ask her straight out but do you guys think that's lame?
Anyways, a little field report.
Today was alright, we chilled with some friends and nothing much happened between us two. After that we just chilled at my house with some other friends and played some bball after. Nothing special =/
Tomorrow's sunday and im wondering.. should i ask her to go do something with me, this time just both me and her, or stop there and start ignoring her for a bit. Guys?
Anyways, a little field report.
Today was alright, we chilled with some friends and nothing much happened between us two. After that we just chilled at my house with some other friends and played some bball after. Nothing special =/
Tomorrow's sunday and im wondering.. should i ask her to go do something with me, this time just both me and her, or stop there and start ignoring her for a bit. Guys?
six-foot AZN '05
Don Juan
Man, what you say when you ask her to prom is not that important unless its
*please I'm begging you because I'm a pathetic wussy who finds you attractive like a goddess and wants to spend the rest of my life worshiping you, will you go to prom with me?*
Make sure it is your own style and on your terms. In my opinion surprises are not very good when it comes to once in a lifetime stuff. I would lead up by talking about prom and how its special and magical. Then I'd dig deeper and ask how she felt about it. Finally, throw in the bait and kino. Boom if she's still talking then you are in.
One last thing, I'm almost done. I would not spend every living moment around her. Try avoiding her every once in a while. 2 reasons. One so that you pre-DJ wuss does not slip out and 2 so that you still have the power of mystery
*please I'm begging you because I'm a pathetic wussy who finds you attractive like a goddess and wants to spend the rest of my life worshiping you, will you go to prom with me?*
Make sure it is your own style and on your terms. In my opinion surprises are not very good when it comes to once in a lifetime stuff. I would lead up by talking about prom and how its special and magical. Then I'd dig deeper and ask how she felt about it. Finally, throw in the bait and kino. Boom if she's still talking then you are in.
One last thing, I'm almost done. I would not spend every living moment around her. Try avoiding her every once in a while. 2 reasons. One so that you pre-DJ wuss does not slip out and 2 so that you still have the power of mystery
That's exactly what i wanted to do. I'm going to get HER to bring up the subject of prom and how she told me she's saving up for it, then make some clever convo that will get me into asking her to the prom. Currently mapping it out..any suggestions?six-foot AZN '05 said:
One thing that is bothering me that i know shouldn't even cross my mind is her AIM profile. I know, i know, dont bother with those what it's getting into my head. She always has those sad smileys in her pf and say stuff like "its so depressing..." and always saying how shes sad. I found out from a friend that she turned down a guy that digs her a lot for some reason. I also overheard she turned him down for the prom as well. I wonder if there's any correlation. This has been going on for MONTHS, even before i started talking to her again after escaping friend zone. Any ideas on what that tiny thing could be? I hope its nothing.
Okay so today i decided not to go anywhere or speak to her. I will keep this up for probably a week and then ask her if she wants to go visit the college that she is attending after high school with me (1 hour drive away, close to beach..so many possibilities for that day). Then move from there.
Half the stupid women I know have **** like that in their AIM profile. Here is a profile I pulled from some random depressed stupid chick on my buddy list:
want to be a tear born in your eyes to slide upon your cheeks and die upon your lips
\\
Who would have known it would be so hard to go on without you....if only we all would have known before. But then it might be even harder, like it could get that way......
See. All high school girls need to have mysteriously sad quotes in they profile, most of the time they are just lyrics from a ****ty dashboard confessional song. You are over-examining this situation, turning it into some overly complicated game. Don't do that, it's dumb. Ignoring her includes not sitting here fretting over what is in her stupid AIM profile. Ethier she likes you or she doesn't, no need to waste your time trying to make her like you.
want to be a tear born in your eyes to slide upon your cheeks and die upon your lips
\\
Who would have known it would be so hard to go on without you....if only we all would have known before. But then it might be even harder, like it could get that way......
See. All high school girls need to have mysteriously sad quotes in they profile, most of the time they are just lyrics from a ****ty dashboard confessional song. You are over-examining this situation, turning it into some overly complicated game. Don't do that, it's dumb. Ignoring her includes not sitting here fretting over what is in her stupid AIM profile. Ethier she likes you or she doesn't, no need to waste your time trying to make her like you.
Microphone Fiend
Master Don Juan
ummm....if u havent turned around and made her do stuff that she doesnt do with her other friends (make out/bone/head/etc) you are still in the friend zone...
Imo u are still in the friend zone but u can see that you are close to gettin out...then again that is neither here nor there, lol
Imo u are still in the friend zone but u can see that you are close to gettin out...then again that is neither here nor there, lol
Well, she's a shy girl to begin with. If she acts normal around other guys but when it comes to me she gets more shy and is afraid of eye contact, that's something right? Either way, I'm still working on it.Microphone Fiend said:
Thanks AB500 for your advice, that helped a lot.
